Wife Says I Have To STOP Going To The Gym Because Colleague Is Attracted To Me r/Relationships

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[00:00:19] Right now, get 15% off your first order at Burrow.com slash ACAST. That's 15% off at Burrow.com slash ACAST. Hence last January I joined the local gym and hired a personal trainer. I lost most of the excess weight and the trainer also helped me gain muscle. I love going to the gym now and working out 3-4 times a week. My wife of course loved my dedication and I sometimes found her staring at me when I was changing, which was cute.

[00:01:40] Overall my confidence improved and I also started dressing nicely and everything just

[00:01:45] fit right. anything inappropriate. My wife checked with her friend, Barb, and she told my wife that Jayce and her friends were discussing my weight loss and how I have completely changed the way I dress. Again, I ignored it as I'm not sure this was raised enough to be reported to HR. The day before yesterday during our Christmas party, Jay approached me twice and asked me to join her on the dance floor.

[00:03:01] I declined and just went about my way.

[00:03:03] By the end of the night, she came to me, and we both cooked a nice breakfast and had a fun family time with our toddler. Afterward, my wife asked me if I could hold off going to the gym for a while. She told me that she feels insecure when other women look at me, and yesterday was a deal-breaker. We never had any similar issues in the 11 years of our marriage. She loved me just the way I was

[00:04:22] and did not care if I became muscular. She told to HR or not because the gym is irrelevant here? OP says yes, also HR person was literally standing 15 feet from where the incident happened,

[00:05:44] so I don't know if things will already be taken care of before I go back after new years. It does not matter who is insecure or who is a problem. The context happily married for 11 years, my family is everything to me. I also understand where insecurity is coming from, as another girl physically crossed a very important boundary with me two nights ago. Want to give her time to work out her emotions before even considering the next steps?

[00:07:00] Thanks for a very insightful comment.

[00:07:02] I think it's the shock of the seconds. I know this JC was there and super drunk and everyone was staring at us. I immediately turned my back towards my teammates to try and ignore her. I am really sorry, you get hit on as I can tell you it was one of the most embarrassing things

[00:08:20] I had to experience. Especially in front of everyone I was dumb and stopped working out. A set you up for more long-term health. Maybe ask her to start coming with you. There is a compromise, but you won't get there without conversation. Ryan Reynolds here from Midmobile.

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[00:11:05] thousands of five-star reviews from customers like 35 female, not feeling comfortable with me, 40 male working out and going to the gym anymore and suggesting I quit. First of all I did not think a million people would read my post and provide me with their perspectives and then share the link to the post.

[00:12:20] To be honest after reading the comments during the few hours or so I realized I was the asshole

[00:12:24] for posting about my wife's reaction in such a sensitive situation. Her examples were a lot of my female friends were complimenting my body and getting hands in. Like pressing my arms and hugging excessively and I didn't stop that. She also said that she caught some of her friends talking to me in a very flirty way, but I just kept on being polite and continued talking as normal. Also, she didn't like her friends talking about me or asking her constantly if I was

[00:13:43] going to come to get togethers.

[00:13:44] When one of her friends expressed some pretty must oblige." And of course, she never intended for me to stop going to the gym and was just upset with the whole situation so that is resolved. As for J.C, the situation is still ongoing. I managed to talk to me the day after the incident and told me that she wouldn't take

[00:15:00] it lightly and I had already contacted HR.

[00:15:03] HR reached out to me yesterday afternoon. but appreciate it. A couple of comments which OP replies to again so someone says so what are you going to do about her friends touching you or flirting with you? I hope you said I honestly did not notice flirting but I did think it's normal for people to compliment you when you lose weight. I would do the same to my friends. I did notice that my friends, guys and girls do touch your arm or poke at the abs sometimes.

[00:16:20] I am of course going to be mindful of it next time.

[00:16:23] As I now know my wife feels uncomfortable about it. Maybe this is a bit strong that the situation between them was a bit swept under the rug. I totally understand insecurity. I understand, you know, potentially not wanting to ruin your relationship over something. But it did feel to me like a lot of fingers were being pointed towards OP yet. OP is just going to the gym and being healthy and looking after themselves.

[00:17:40] But now what do you guys make of this situation?

[00:17:43] Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. going to name her kid Madeline, but spelt different of course, as if that made it any better. Her daughter's name was going to be Madeline with an eye instead of an ear in it. I was completely shocked. Never in my wildest dreams that I expect that Jasmine would want to name her kid Madeline as well. If she told me before we named our daughter, I probably would have

[00:19:01] taken that into consideration before naming her. I asked her why her aunt would want to name her daughter the same name as her. I'm still really upset and hope she changes her mind. This morning my brother-in-law texted me and said I should try to better understand Jasmine

[00:20:20] and her feelings.

[00:20:21] I texted him back and told him that she should stop being such a witch and try to understand

[00:20:26] my feelings instead. different nicknames or you call them both by their first and middle names when they're together. We have multiple instances of some names in my family and it's really not hard to differentiate. Like I have two cousins called Anne, we just call them Anne Louise and Anne Marie. A little bit unrelated but there was a story a couple of months back, maybe I don't know how long ago actually, it might be a year back, so many of these stories.

[00:21:43] Where every, I think it was every Madeline aren't even pronounced the same

[00:23:00] and the kids are so far apart in age they won't ever be playing together.