My Wife Secretly Keeps Giving Away My Things To Her Family r/Relationships

[00:00:00] Hold up, what was that?

[00:00:04] Boring!

[00:00:05] No flavor!

[00:00:06] That was as bad as those leftovers you ate all week.

[00:00:09] Kicky Palmer here and it's time to say hello to something fresh and guilt-free.

[00:00:14] Hello Fresh.

[00:00:15] Jazz up dinner with pecan, crusted chicken or garlic butter shrimps campy.

[00:00:18] Now that's music to my mouth.

[00:00:21] Hello, Fresh.

[00:00:22] Let's get this dinner party started.

[00:00:24] Discover all the delicious possibilities at hellofresh.com.

[00:00:36] Hey, Waffle Gang.

[00:00:37] I do hope you're well.

[00:00:38] My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit Stories and if you do love

[00:00:43] a Reddit Story why not consider hitting that like, subscribe, maybe that notification

[00:00:47] bell too.

[00:00:48] Let's crack on with today's first story.

[00:00:51] Much love guys.

[00:00:52] Now today's first story comes from NoPayment4096 from the MIVR Soul here, SubReddits and

[00:00:57] says I'm IVR Soul here for leaving my wife over a computer.

[00:01:02] My 26 male have been married to my wife Emma for four years.

[00:01:07] She is a social work major who I met in one of my Gen Ed classes.

[00:01:11] I explained to her that I was a mechanical engineer major.

[00:01:15] She then asked if I could tutor her in math and that's how we began dating.

[00:01:19] Afterwards, I decided to get my masters in Japanese to help me gain more career opportunities.

[00:01:25] My wife thought it was a silly idea and she said she wouldn't be funding it so

[00:01:29] then we decided to keep our finances separate.

[00:01:32] It wasn't a big deal since I was still working anyways.

[00:01:35] I just had less free time but she was making more than me during this time.

[00:01:40] It paid off and I recently landed a high paying job and with that came more stress

[00:01:45] due to me having to travel to Japan often.

[00:01:49] I've really been wanting to get into gaming so I invested in computer parts costing around

[00:01:53] 1500.

[00:01:55] Once I took the parts out of the box my wife noticed the receipt and asked how

[00:01:59] I could be so irresponsible with my money.

[00:02:02] She assumed I still made the same amount but when I told her that I make triple that amount

[00:02:07] she began giving me the silent treatment.

[00:02:10] During this time I began to notice my things were going missing.

[00:02:13] I wanted to go fishing with some friends one time and when I was looking for my rods

[00:02:17] she must have noticed and she said she had given them to our uncle.

[00:02:21] I told her not to take my stuff without asking but didn't mind too much because they

[00:02:25] were old so I just bought some more.

[00:02:29] After the time I was about to go to the gym and I was looking for my pre-workout.

[00:02:33] I always keep three jars.

[00:02:35] I luckily had a can of monster and that helped.

[00:02:38] I asked my wife when she got home from work and she said she had given them to her cousin.

[00:02:43] I asked her to reimburse me because they cost like $50 a jar.

[00:02:46] She said I make enough to replace them and just ignored me for the rest of the day.

[00:02:51] One day when she thought I was asleep she was talking to someone on the phone explaining

[00:02:55] how she's going to move my parents into our house.

[00:02:58] She hadn't explained this to me.

[00:03:00] We only have three rooms, one is her office, one is my office slash game room and the other is our bedroom.

[00:03:06] She told the person on the phone who I assume is her sister that she's going to give my

[00:03:10] gaming setup to her brother to make room and that I'll get over it eventually.

[00:03:15] So today I left work early to catch her in the middle of her plans

[00:03:19] and I walked in our apartment and her and her brother were then placing everything into a box.

[00:03:24] I asked her what was going on and my wife whose face was pale

[00:03:27] said she was cleaning when her brother came by.

[00:03:30] I asked him did he plan on taking my computer?

[00:03:33] Of course he denied.

[00:03:35] So I went into the room to get the iPad we share and I looked through the text on there

[00:03:39] and it clearly shows my wife telling him when to pick it up and to deny that he had it.

[00:03:45] I told him to get out and asked her why she thinks she's so entitled to my stuff.

[00:03:50] I've never yelled at her and I guess they scared her because she began to cry.

[00:03:54] She ended up packing a bag and went to stay with her sister.

[00:03:57] While she was out I picked up a lock for my office.

[00:04:00] A sister texted me calling me an asshole.

[00:04:03] I'm beginning to think I could have handled this better.

[00:04:05] I'm looking for advice.

[00:04:07] Now I think the title is slightly off here you're not leaving her over a computer

[00:04:12] but the second paragraph didn't feel right to me as well where it said

[00:04:16] afterwards you decided to get your masters in Japanese to help you gain more career opportunities

[00:04:21] and your wife said it was a silly idea she wouldn't be funding it.

[00:04:25] That in itself didn't make me feel right this is your wife this is someone that you would

[00:04:30] hope would love you right and would support you.

[00:04:33] I know if I was in her position and you know partners said to me that they want to

[00:04:38] get their masters because it might help you gain career opportunities

[00:04:41] even if they was just doing it for a hobby you know.

[00:04:44] I'd be like hell yeah you do you let's get on that kind of thing.

[00:04:49] And the story said move my parents into our house I'm assuming it's her parents.

[00:04:55] Either way doing it without talking to you doesn't make it right and she's stealing

[00:04:59] and giving your stuff away this is so much more than just a computer.

[00:05:04] But in the comments Lord Cheesy Beans what a great name love Cheesy Beans.

[00:05:09] You're not leaving her over a computer you're leaving her for repeatedly stealing

[00:05:14] and lying to you get the fuck out.

[00:05:17] No stairway denies her stealing lying making major life decisions without you

[00:05:22] not being supportive of you when you decide to get more education

[00:05:25] and then punishing you when you get a good job as a result

[00:05:28] not respecting you as a human being yeah saying leaving her over a computer

[00:05:34] is a ridiculous way to put it.

[00:05:37] Limpstar says not the asshole but this is bigger than a computer

[00:05:40] your wife is manipulating things and being selfish

[00:05:43] sounds like she is resentful as well if you want to save the marriage

[00:05:47] insist on counseling otherwise you know what to do.

[00:05:51] Al K Ferrell says you're not leaving her over a computer

[00:05:54] you're leaving her because she is an immature dishonest asshole who's stealing your stuff.

[00:05:59] Change the locks on the exterior doors pack a shit and put it outside

[00:06:03] tell the rest of her thieving family accomplices to come get it.

[00:06:07] Separate your finances utterly new credit cards kill the old joint ones

[00:06:11] new passwords on financial accounts including amazon.com

[00:06:15] file for divorce as soon as you can not the asshole.

[00:06:19] The final comment from Divine Exodus who says it's not about the computer my guy

[00:06:23] she feels snubbed by your success and instead of being happy for you

[00:06:27] she has turned into this skeevy little thief in her mind well he can afford it now

[00:06:32] has probably popped up a few times she never cared to ask about how your career was going

[00:06:37] so she has no idea how much more you are earning

[00:06:39] and finding out the way she did has put her on edge.

[00:06:42] She should have been asking after you it seems like you're just roommates

[00:06:46] I don't know why you didn't share your successes with her but I can't imagine

[00:06:50] why she'd think you'll be jetting off to Japan constantly for work

[00:06:53] if you hadn't had a major career change.

[00:06:55] If I came home and my boyfriend was giving away my PC he'd be on his ass so fast

[00:07:00] he'd break the sound barrier just leave start moving important documents while she's gone

[00:07:05] keep them in a safe place which she doesn't have access to

[00:07:08] Lock down your personal information change passwords add two-factor authentication to

[00:07:13] important accounts and save those messages she sent to her brother before she can delete them

[00:07:18] best of luck my friend congrats on your successes

[00:07:22] So two months later OP updates the post and says after about a week staying at

[00:07:26] her sister's house Emma called me and asked if we could meet up

[00:07:30] I agreed and we met at a park she apologized for everything and said she thought she was

[00:07:34] doing what was best for everybody I asked what if I just gave her expensive makeup to my sister

[00:07:40] she admitted that she would be upset I then asked why did she think it would be any different

[00:07:45] for me she didn't have a reason and her sister told her how unfair she was being to me

[00:07:50] we decided to give her another chance and she moved back in it was good until she started

[00:07:55] moving her things into my office I asked her what she was doing and she explained how she

[00:07:59] needed the room for her parents I told her no and that's not happening

[00:08:03] I grabbed her things and placed them back into her office I told her that they could move in but

[00:08:08] my space has to remain untouched on top of that we need to determine how bills are going to be paid

[00:08:15] she called me a selfish jerk and then ran back to her sisters I guess her sister told her she was

[00:08:20] being inconsiderate once again but apparently they got into an argument because the sister

[00:08:24] refuses to take their parents in and she's tired of hearing about her problems I agreed with

[00:08:29] her the sister has four kids the sister called and told me everything and said that Emma went to

[00:08:34] her parents house I tried to call her but she ignored my phone calls for two weeks I decided I couldn't

[00:08:40] live like this so I filed for divorce and handed to her at her parents house she called and begged

[00:08:46] me to forgive her I told her I'm not sure if I can she refused to sign it until we go to

[00:08:51] counseling I refused and said she has two weeks to suggest that so now I live alone

[00:08:56] she still refuses to sign the papers but that doesn't stop the divorce it just makes it harder

[00:09:01] and a couple of top comments after that post goddess of spice says so she didn't change at all and

[00:09:06] we're still trying to do what she wanted at your expense yeah get that divorce done

[00:09:10] she's a piece of shit she wanted to live with her parents and now she can in their house

[00:09:16] another comment says Emma's inability to respect boundaries and communicate effectively

[00:09:20] led to the dissolution of the relationship sometimes walking away is the only option

[00:09:24] for self-preservation additional hat says in quotes I told her that they could move in but

[00:09:29] my space has to remain untouched and says you're way too nice to suggest something so life changing

[00:09:35] on a whim she's walking all over you and sees you as the monopoly man or something you cannot

[00:09:40] trust her divorce and get it over with make a list of everything she stole in case she wants

[00:09:45] to demand money in the divorce absolutely I couldn't see this going any other way really and like

[00:09:51] that last comment said when op said that they could move in his space has to remain untouched and it

[00:09:57] just felt like it was like a really flippant comment yeah they can move in if they want but

[00:10:00] you need to do this I was like hell no this is a big discussion but like I said I couldn't see

[00:10:06] it ending any other way really but what do you guys make of this situation let me know your

[00:10:12] thoughts down in the comments below and let's move on to another story mom deserves the best

[00:10:21] and there's no better place to shop for Mother's Day than Whole Foods Market they're your destination

[00:10:26] for unbeatable savings from premium gifts to show stopping flowers and irresistible desserts start

[00:10:32] by saving 33% with prime on all body care and candles then get a 15 stem bunch of tulips for just

[00:10:38] 9.99 each with prime round out mom's menu with festive rosé irresistible berry shantilly cake

[00:10:45] and more special treats come celebrate Mother's Day at Whole Foods Market have a catch yourself

[00:10:50] eating the same flavorless dinner three days in a row dreaming of something better well hello fresh is

[00:10:56] your guilt-free dream come true baby it's me giggy Palmer let's wake up those taste buds with

[00:11:02] hot juicy pecan crusted chicken or garlic butter shrimp scampi hello fresh stop dreaming of all

[00:11:10] the delicious possibilities and dig in at hello fresh dot com let's get this dinner party started

[00:11:23] and our next story comes from the am I the arsehole subreddit from unlikely ad it has a

[00:11:27] couple of updates attached to it and it's am I the arsehole for ruining my mom's engagement

[00:11:32] party after she abandoned me when I was 11 I 17 male have a strange relationship with my mom

[00:11:40] 35 female after an incident that happened about six years ago my mom was super strict in

[00:11:45] a helicopter parent so we fought a lot over my grades and the trouble I got into a school

[00:11:50] she had essentially abandoned me signing over custody to my dad after I told her something

[00:11:55] along the lines of I hate you and I wish I lived with dad typical things and angsty preteen

[00:12:01] says to their parent for that fight seemed to have broke her and she cried before dropping

[00:12:05] me off at my dad's apartment I thought it would be a big deal and I would just see her

[00:12:10] the next day after she proved her point but she left me there after that things got essentially

[00:12:16] worse for me my grades dropped and I kept getting into trouble at school almost to the point where

[00:12:21] I was kicked out my dad never had job security so money was tight his girlfriend also wasn't fond

[00:12:27] of me saying I was dumped on them I wanted to go back to live with my mom I thought to

[00:12:33] apologize but my mom had essentially moved on with her life she went back to college to get a

[00:12:38] degree and was always studying and later on was focused on a new work on the weekends I would get

[00:12:44] to see her things were tense between us she tried so hard to be the fun parent eating takeout and

[00:12:51] leave me to do what I wanted but it was so unlike her and we became more estranged three years ago

[00:12:57] she started dating Paul 39 male a widower with two daughters nine female and 13 female

[00:13:05] she started treating his daughter like they were her own and they started calling her mummy

[00:13:10] which irritated me eventually they moved into my mom's house and changed my childhood bedroom

[00:13:15] into one of the daughters rooms I was livid when I found out saying some mean things about the girls

[00:13:21] and refused to go back there my mom's weekends but she was confused on why I was acting this way

[00:13:26] because of this fight she thought I wouldn't be attending the engagement party when she

[00:13:31] announced her and Paul would be getting married besides she didn't want to ruin the perfect picture

[00:13:35] of her new family I made it a point to go for the party and called her out on her behavior

[00:13:41] I wanted to confront her and tell her she wouldn't have to bother with me after I go to college

[00:13:46] but I may have taken it a tad too far everyone kept talking about how Paul's daughters were

[00:13:51] like her children and how it would be when she had more kids and it snapped something in me

[00:13:57] I called her a horrible parent and told her that she was trying to replace me with the

[00:14:01] little brats after she had abandoned me along with some other insults I don't really remember

[00:14:07] Paul kicked me and my dad out saying I was an asshole for making his fiancé and girls cry

[00:14:12] and ruining the engagement party he said I won't be allowed to the wedding unless I called

[00:14:17] and apologized I may have taken it a bit too far but my dad agrees she had it coming after

[00:14:22] abandoning a young child at an age when I needed my mother so am I the asshole and should I apologize

[00:14:30] OP adds an edit which gives some information about the mom and what the fights were all about

[00:14:35] before you know everything happened and OP says it was mostly to do with homework

[00:14:40] she would check my work every day for notes from my teachers whether or not it was neat or

[00:14:45] correct she also wrote to my teachers to have my place in class changed so I was closer to

[00:14:49] the front and would pay attention I wasn't allowed to use the internet unless it was for school and

[00:14:55] she made sure to check for that she was also pretty strict about my sleep schedule and what I ate

[00:15:00] wasn't able to go for any sleepovers either until I started living with my dad OP added an edit

[00:15:06] in the same day and says there's a lot going on here and I haven't had the time to look

[00:15:10] through everything so I still haven't decided on what to do but to answer some questions

[00:15:15] one helicopter parenting I mentioned some of the things my mom did but it didn't give the

[00:15:20] entire picture some people say it was just usual parenting but it felt so constricting

[00:15:25] that was very different from when I was at my dad's I also wasn't the smartest kid out and

[00:15:29] sometimes it felt like I was being punished for that two did we have arguments before

[00:15:35] mom and I were prone to screaming matches if I didn't immediately do what she said

[00:15:39] no I never hit her it was mostly shouting three did I apologize no I didn't I know that would be

[00:15:47] my single biggest regret I don't know if that warrants the rest of what happened or

[00:15:51] if it would have changed anything or what was the trouble at school it mostly had to do with

[00:15:57] phasing out or losing my patience I got into a couple of fights with other kids who teased me

[00:16:02] on my home situation but it was nothing serious as mentioned I'm not an academic so there

[00:16:08] was always trouble with that five therapy I spoke to someone when I was younger and my parents had

[00:16:14] me see the school counselor two years ago but I find it hard to talk to other people I'm also on

[00:16:20] meds which were supposed to help with my moods six dad and mom situation my parents separated

[00:16:26] when I was a baby my dad is 40 and used to work in construction until he got injured and

[00:16:31] could no longer pay child support when my mom transferred custody she began to pay support

[00:16:37] with my dad full-time and my mom on weekends when I feel like going winter breaks my mom takes me out

[00:16:42] of state to grand's where we stay with the rest of the family I can do math I know how old my mom

[00:16:47] was when she had me and that I basically ruined her life so there's no need to point that out

[00:16:52] there is an overwhelming amount of attention on this post that has given me mixed messages

[00:16:57] I regret posting this because of how confused it has gotten me about my parents and childhood

[00:17:01] but I do appreciate the support and advice especially from other people who had similar

[00:17:06] issues I will try to do another update when I figure out what to do so around 11 days later

[00:17:13] opiads that what they call their final update and says so a lot has happened I never expected this

[00:17:18] post to get this much attention with so many mixed reactions and honestly it confused me to

[00:17:23] say the least while this forum was blowing up I had to go to school like normal it's been

[00:17:28] a few weeks since the engagement party the kid who there has been relentlessly mocking

[00:17:33] me for what happened I thought he would eventually let it go but yesterday when he brought it again

[00:17:37] I lost my call and got into a physical fight with him he was given the tension but I was suspended

[00:17:43] the school called my mom and got Paul instead then she was in a meeting he came and got me

[00:17:49] things were awkward in the car ride and we didn't say a word to each other until he asked me if

[00:17:53] I was going to apologize to my mom I told him I didn't even want to go to his stupid wedding

[00:17:59] Paul was so confused when I said this and told me that my mom had gotten mad at him for saying

[00:18:03] I couldn't attend and that she knew I wouldn't apologize if they told me to because I was stubborn

[00:18:08] he said she had called my dad weeks ago and said I could go because she really wanted me to be there

[00:18:13] and my dad said he would talk to me I don't know why but when I heard this I burst out in

[00:18:18] tears embarrassingly enough I don't know if it is the suspension or reading all the comments

[00:18:23] but I really couldn't hold it in anymore it took me way too long to stop and Paul was really freaked

[00:18:29] out so he parked somewhere and tried to calm me down I ended up telling him everything about what

[00:18:34] happened when I was a kid and how I felt about my mom they also confessed that I wish

[00:18:39] he would yell at me or scold me for my outburst because it felt like she didn't care anymore

[00:18:43] and just hated me for what I said just fucked up I know I thought if I ever repeated what I

[00:18:48] wrote on this post to another person they would think I was human garbage but he just

[00:18:53] listened to me and let me get everything off my chest I guess that's what being a girl dad is

[00:18:59] surprisingly he didn't blame me in fact it was the opposite he said he understood me

[00:19:04] he works with her so he knew that my mom was a tough woman and he had never seen a cry before

[00:19:09] until that day and was unsure how to approach her after so he didn't blame me for not knowing

[00:19:14] how to talk to her after what happened when I was a child he didn't give me details but

[00:19:18] he assured me that my mom didn't hate me and the situation is more complicated than what I know

[00:19:24] Paul said I shouldn't bear all the blame and if I was uncomfortable maybe myself and my mom

[00:19:29] could go speak to the therapist he saw after his wife had passed he was mad at my dad though

[00:19:35] apparently this was not the first time my dad had said he would talk to me about something

[00:19:39] and just didn't Paul suspected my dad wanted to get me to have another outburst at the wedding

[00:19:44] because he was still somewhat resentful towards my mother I don't know how to take this because

[00:19:49] while my dad didn't really like my mom I don't think he would actually do something like that

[00:19:54] either way I think I owe it to myself and my mom to at least to try and reconciliation

[00:19:59] and deal with my trauma so I could let go of my anger towards her I at least apologize to

[00:20:04] Paul's girls my dad wasn't home so I spent the rest of the day at my mom's the nine-year-old

[00:20:09] forgave me almost instantly like she didn't actually care and asked me about dinosaurs for

[00:20:14] the rest of the evening the 13 year old is still pretty mad but mostly because Paul had to give

[00:20:19] up a new room and share with his sister I tried to say I was okay if she took back the room

[00:20:24] I wouldn't but it only seemed right to give it to her after what I did but Paul said they make

[00:20:29] a plan when they remodeled I knew I needed to apologize to my mom as well but that seemed

[00:20:34] just so much harder I know you guys recommended writing a letter but I didn't really have enough

[00:20:39] time nor did I know what I was gonna say yet there is these flower bushes in our garden though

[00:20:44] I have a vivid memory of when I was a kid my mom getting mad when I destroyed one only to forgive

[00:20:49] me when I give another flowers from them it's a bit pathetic for a grown child to give her weeds

[00:20:54] but because he couldn't get a word out but I think the gesture meant the same for her like

[00:20:59] it did for me she finally asked me if I was better living at my dad's and honestly I don't know

[00:21:05] I know you guys don't think the best of him and things did seem to be worse when I stayed with

[00:21:09] him but he was a decent dad and I didn't want to just lose him like I did my mom she said she

[00:21:14] would be speaking to him after our meeting with school on Monday for the family therapy

[00:21:18] and if I was open to the idea of staying with her some nights during the week too

[00:21:22] as of now Paul has spoken to her and she already made the appointment for us to see

[00:21:25] the therapist next week she also spoke to me about anger management classes too

[00:21:30] and said she should go with me if that's what I wanted honestly don't know what's going to

[00:21:34] happen with the school if the therapy would work for us and if I'd ever be able to truly let go

[00:21:38] of my belt at resentment but I feel like everything's gonna be okay thanks for all the

[00:21:43] comments even the horrible ones got me thinking just a bit we'll never be posting on reddit

[00:21:48] again but I do appreciate having the space to find the words to say what I needed to

[00:21:52] and everyone who shared their deep and some dark stories that made them relate to my relationship

[00:21:57] hope things turn out okay for you too thank goodness for Paul in this situation actually just

[00:22:02] taking a step back and listening to op open up about their feelings and you know everything

[00:22:08] that's going on and listen to their point of view hopefully with the therapy and stuff it's

[00:22:14] moved things on the right track for them but what do you guys make of this situation

[00:22:20] oh my word it always breaks my heart you know I know I know they're 17 I can remember myself

[00:22:26] as a 17 year old you know confused dealing with all sorts of feelings and I weren't dealing with

[00:22:32] what op was dealing with but had my own issues going on at the time and you know it's just

[00:22:36] it's it's just like a fog around your head all the time I'm so bless op and I really do wish

[00:22:44] them the best but what do you guys make of this situation let me know your thoughts down

[00:22:49] in the comments below now just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved

[00:22:53] in today's stories your love your support your time always means the absolute world to me so

[00:22:58] thank you so so much and hopefully I'll see you in the next one take care I'm much love have a

[00:23:32] catch yourself eating the same flavorless dinner three days in a row dreaming of something better

[00:23:37] well hello fresh is your guilt-free dream come true baby it's me giggy Palmer let's wake up

[00:23:43] those taste buds with hot juicy pecan crusted chicken or garlic butter shrimp scampi hello fresh

[00:23:52] stop dreaming of all the delicious possibilities and dig in at hello fresh.com

[00:23:57] let's get this dinner party started