My Sister-In-Law KICKED OUT Her Teenage Sons, I'm Going Nuclear r/Relationships

[00:00:03] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories. And if you do love a Reddit story, why not consider that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys.

[00:00:20] Now today's first story comes from the amiv.asshole here subreddit. Quick warning, it does contain violence as well. And it says, amiv.asshole for wanting to go nuclear after my sister-in-law kicked out her teenage sons. Hey everyone, my husband 34 and I 36 are in a tough situation with my sister-in-law, Barbara 41. And we need an outside perspective on whether we're overreacting or if our stance is justified.

[00:00:47] We're leaning towards the latter but are open to thoughts. Thanks in advance.

[00:00:53] Barbara has four boys. L, 17. O, 14. R, 13. And C, 7. Despite her having a rough history with bad relationships, her kids have always been well behaved. The only constant man in her life has been Reese, 48. Her on and off husband who does nothing for her or the kids except work. He blows his money gambling.

[00:01:17] Cheats on her openly and relies on her for everything else. For seven years, she's come to us, venting about him, swearing it's the last time but always goes back.

[00:01:28] In 2020, after yet another huge fight, the entire family intervened. We sat her down, told her we were here to help with anything she needed. Lawyers, a safe place for her and the kids, even handling the legal stuff if necessary.

[00:01:43] She agreed to kick him out, but within six months, he was back because he couldn't find a place to stay.

[00:01:50] This grown man has worked a steady job for 20 years, somehow needed help.

[00:01:56] Since then, things have gotten progressively worse. Barbara decided to stick with marriage counseling, even though the whole family urged her to leave.

[00:02:04] She's clung to the idea of honoring her marriage despite the toxic environment.

[00:02:09] As a result, her kids have started to suffer. The eldest, Elle, started skipping school and smoking heavily.

[00:02:17] A few months ago, my husband got a 2am call from Elle, who said he was suicidal and afraid to act on it.

[00:02:23] When we got to their house, we learned he has told his stepdad the same thing, and Reese told him, just do it because no one would care.

[00:02:31] My husband understandably punched him in the face. We took Elle to the hospital and, after his release, brought him home with us for three weeks to help him recover.

[00:02:41] Eventually, Elle returned to his mum's house, thinking things had smoothed over, but they quickly fell apart again.

[00:02:49] Soon enough, the oldest, Elle, began having issues too. For months, they'd been fighting constantly, and we didn't realize how bad it had gotten until we couldn't get in touch with either of them.

[00:02:59] Barbara had gone silent.

[00:03:01] My husband showed up at her house unannounced, something our family often does for fun, only to find out that she had washed her hands of Elle and Elle for being disrespectful and kicked them out.

[00:03:12] She'd even turned off their phones and didn't know where they were staying.

[00:03:15] We found out they'd been crashing with friends for weeks, trying to stay under the radar because they were embarrassed.

[00:03:22] We picked them up from school and brought them home with us again.

[00:03:25] They told us that their mum and stepdad had been bullying them, constantly fighting, and they didn't feel safe going back.

[00:03:31] Barbara admitted that she put them out, but insisted things weren't as bad as they made it sound.

[00:03:37] Now, my husband and I want to go full nuclear. Report this to CPS, the police, and anyone who can intervene.

[00:03:43] But the rest of the family wants to handle it internally.

[00:03:47] We feel like two minors were abandoned, and that deserves an extreme response, but the family is now saying we're overreacting, and at the end of the day, these are not our children.

[00:03:56] So, are we the assholes for not wanting to report this situation and not leave it to family discussions?

[00:04:02] The two oldest boys are with us for now, but we're ready to escalate this.

[00:04:07] And straight after, like in the same post, they updated with a small brief update saying,

[00:04:11] We called the police. Thank you for the support.

[00:04:14] And yeah, immediately, my thoughts were, report this absolutely straight away.

[00:04:20] She washed their hands of a 17 and a 14 year old.

[00:04:24] And screw those people who saying that they want to handle it internally when they've done nothing up to this point anyway.

[00:04:30] They're just quite happy to sit on the sidelines and watch this shit show happen while there's child abuse going on.

[00:04:36] Hell no, report it.

[00:04:38] 74 Magic says, escalate it Monday morning.

[00:04:41] Good grief, what a mess.

[00:04:43] Not the asshole.

[00:04:44] Snarky replies saying, no, don't wait for a business day.

[00:04:47] This needs to be handled now.

[00:04:48] A call to CPS and police.

[00:04:50] You can't kick your kids out of your home.

[00:04:52] There are still two kids in the home.

[00:04:54] They need to be checked on too.

[00:04:56] Julia says, not the asshole.

[00:04:58] You don't handle crimes internally.

[00:05:00] Like how churches in college protect rapists and police precincts protect dirty cops and families protect child abusers.

[00:05:06] This is child abuse.

[00:05:08] Reporter.

[00:05:10] Catmo Catmo says, 100% abuse.

[00:05:13] And although the oldest two were the only ones kicked out, we all know that it was only because they pushed back.

[00:05:18] All four of those kids are suffering the same abuse.

[00:05:22] The oldest two are the only ones who have the ability to stand up against it.

[00:05:26] This has been going on for far too long while the family stood by and watched.

[00:05:30] They had a chance to handle this.

[00:05:32] And yet they did nothing.

[00:05:33] This isn't about appeasing the family.

[00:05:36] This is protecting those poor defenseless children and advocating for them all.

[00:05:40] When they can't do it for themselves.

[00:05:43] So around 13 days later, OP comes in with an update and says,

[00:05:47] it's been nearly two weeks since I made my original post and it's been a wild ride.

[00:05:52] I have to be incredibly vague because of the newly opened case.

[00:05:55] But here's the most important thing.

[00:05:57] All of our nephews are safe with us.

[00:05:59] The boys have always had a safe place here and visited often since they were tiny.

[00:06:03] Long before any of this chaos started.

[00:06:06] So while the transition has been emotionally jarring for them, the move itself was thankfully smooth.

[00:06:11] Now as for Barbara and Reese.

[00:06:14] They're facing charges regarding their treatment of the boys.

[00:06:17] It was worse than we originally thought.

[00:06:19] Barbara seems remorseful but my husband is still livid.

[00:06:23] He believes she's only feeling sorry now that everything's out in the open and consequences are on the table.

[00:06:28] Whether her remorse is genuine or not, I'm just relieved we took action when we did.

[00:06:33] Because it's terrifying to think how much worse things could have gotten if we hadn't.

[00:06:37] Family wise, everything is a mess.

[00:06:40] The entire family is split over this and it's not even worth the text to go over the thoughts of those who oppose us.

[00:06:46] Those who have sided with us however, have been a tremendous help.

[00:06:50] Even though there are a lot of family issues and the logistics are complicated.

[00:06:54] Fuck it.

[00:06:54] We made the right decision.

[00:06:56] What I can share in more detail is that, soon after I posted, Reese showed up at our house, demanding that the boys return home with him.

[00:07:04] They refused.

[00:07:05] I told him to leave but he escalated things, got loud, aggressive and started cursing at me and the boys.

[00:07:10] My husband wasn't home at the time.

[00:07:12] He was out picking up clothes and toiletries for L and O.

[00:07:15] I can only assume Reese felt emboldened by my husband's absence because out of nowhere, he sucker punched me right in the mouth.

[00:07:22] And Reddit, I'm not ashamed to admit.

[00:07:24] I saw red.

[00:07:25] I swung back.

[00:07:27] It wasn't smart but I did.

[00:07:29] He wasn't expecting that.

[00:07:31] I'm nice and really, really easygoing but I guess I forgot that.

[00:07:35] I jumped on him and let's just say he didn't expect the fight.

[00:07:38] I might not have landed the best hits but he wasn't prepared for one at all.

[00:07:42] He scrambled out of there and sped off.

[00:07:44] I immediately called 911 while the boys called my husband who thankfully was just around the corner.

[00:07:50] I'm fine, just ended up with a busted lip that looks worse than it was.

[00:07:53] Then my husband insisted I go to urgent care.

[00:07:56] The police met us there and that's when we reported everything.

[00:08:00] Reese's assault and the whole situation with the boys.

[00:08:03] Reese and Barbara were picked up the next day.

[00:08:05] And in the middle of all this shit, I found out I'm pregnant.

[00:08:09] Yep.

[00:08:10] While I was at urgent care, they ran a routine test and boom.

[00:08:13] Positive.

[00:08:14] I had no idea.

[00:08:15] No symptoms or anything but it's still super early.

[00:08:19] All things aside, thank you for all your comments, advice and ideas.

[00:08:22] Your support made a difference and my nephews are safe.

[00:08:26] The top comment on this one said,

[00:08:27] Anyone else think of the woman who took a hammer to a guy's window when he threw hot coffee on her

[00:08:32] in the fast food drive-thru?

[00:08:34] In her interview where she said,

[00:08:35] Women are allowed to have responses other than crying.

[00:08:38] Bravo to this woman taking a stance for her nephews and most importantly herself.

[00:08:42] It's disgusting there are people like Reese who will attack people who they think won't defend themselves.

[00:08:48] Sieb says,

[00:08:49] Not a symptom.

[00:08:50] I bet those pregnancy hormones are part of the reason you fought back.

[00:08:53] Good for you.

[00:08:55] Profession Sanity says,

[00:08:56] Yep, that's what I was thinking.

[00:08:58] Mama Bear was activated.

[00:09:00] First, congratulations on your pregnancy by the way.

[00:09:03] And of course, I'm extremely sorry that you're going through all of this to begin with.

[00:09:08] And I'm also incredibly glad, and I'm not sure if that's the right words to say in this situation,

[00:09:12] but I'm glad that a person like you is the one dealing with it because, you know,

[00:09:17] some of your family is willing to sit by while this was going on,

[00:09:19] where you took a stand for these children.

[00:09:22] You helped them out of it.

[00:09:24] You and your husband, of course, absolute champs.

[00:09:27] But all I can say is I wish you all the best going forward.

[00:09:30] You and the children as well and your pregnancy, of course.

[00:09:34] But I must certainly keep an eye out for an update on that one.

[00:09:37] But what do you guys make of this situation?

[00:09:40] Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:09:43] And let's move on to another story.

[00:09:47] Now, our next story comes from For The Good Times from the Am I The Arsehole here subreddit.

[00:09:52] And warnings on this one.

[00:09:53] It contains mentions of miscarriage, violence,

[00:09:55] and it also has a warning of possible sexual assault as well.

[00:09:59] And it's titled Am I The Arsehole for telling my sister I won't be her surrogate?

[00:10:04] Excuse my errors in etiquette.

[00:10:06] I'm not frequent to Reddit.

[00:10:08] My friend suggested I use her throwaway account to make this post.

[00:10:11] So please be gentle with me as much as strangers on the internet can be.

[00:10:15] I, Celeste, 30 female, have an identical twin sister.

[00:10:19] We call her Stacey for the sake of the story.

[00:10:22] Our mother unfortunately passed in child labor and we were raised by our father.

[00:10:27] Stacey has been married to Jeff for eight years.

[00:10:30] And I've been in a relationship with Mike for three years now.

[00:10:33] One thing I've always known about my sister is that she wanted to be a mom.

[00:10:38] Even when we were children, she was always thinking about wedding ideas, nursery themes, baby names, etc.

[00:10:45] I was always more focused on books and having fun.

[00:10:48] I'm now a flight attendant.

[00:10:50] I'm also attempting to become a published author.

[00:10:53] My sister has not worked.

[00:10:55] Ever, honestly.

[00:10:56] When we graduated high school, we went straight to college.

[00:11:00] She met her boyfriend in college and once she graduated became a stay-at-home girlfriend until she became his wife.

[00:11:05] I've known for a while that my sister has been attempting to become pregnant, unsuccessfully.

[00:11:11] She has experienced a single miscarriage and has been unable to become pregnant again after thousands and thousands of dollars spent on IVF

[00:11:19] and pretty much anything they could do because she wanted to experience pregnancy.

[00:11:24] After five years of no success, they have started to discuss other options.

[00:11:29] My sister isn't interested in adoption and is very adamant on having a child that has both her DNA.

[00:11:35] Her words, not mine.

[00:11:37] About three weeks ago, she came to my house and we're hanging out as we usually do,

[00:11:42] just chatting and watching modern family.

[00:11:44] She told me she has a serious question and needed to ask me while she still had her nerves.

[00:11:49] It scared me but she asked if I could be her surrogate.

[00:11:53] I was frozen for a second and asked what she meant.

[00:11:56] She told me that I know what a surrogate was.

[00:11:58] She needed me to be her surrogate.

[00:12:01] I expressed that she knew I wasn't interested in having children.

[00:12:05] This could definitely be due to how we came into the world.

[00:12:08] But I'll be honest and say I have never found the thought of having children appealing in any way.

[00:12:13] I told her I would have zero issue with donating my eggs to her.

[00:12:17] However many she needed, she could have them all.

[00:12:19] But I could not carry her child.

[00:12:21] Upon hearing that, she became so angry.

[00:12:24] Her face was so red.

[00:12:25] She was just yelling about how it's obvious, how jealous and hateful I am because this is a small task.

[00:12:31] I didn't want to bring it to her attention that she's always spoke about having more than four kids.

[00:12:36] Would the expectation be for me to do this every time?

[00:12:39] I don't know.

[00:12:40] I'm starting to feel so bad.

[00:12:42] She ended up telling me that if I couldn't do this one thing for her, how could I ever call myself her sister?

[00:12:48] She broke a picture of us I have sitting on my mantle and stormed out.

[00:12:52] Since then, she's only texted me pictures of her diaries from when we were kids and all of their vision boards saying that I'm stopping her from creating a family for no reason and to think about the bigger picture.

[00:13:02] My boyfriend refuses to give me advice saying that it's my sister and he doesn't feel comfortable attempting to sway me in either direction because it's such a touchy subject.

[00:13:11] Honestly, this is the longest I've ever gone without communicating with my sister and I'm seriously on the verge of giving in.

[00:13:18] Am I the arsehole for not wanting to be a surrogate for my identical twin sister?

[00:13:24] Edit.

[00:13:25] I'm reading all the comments and I want to say thank you so much.

[00:13:28] I feel so much better knowing I'm not the villain.

[00:13:30] But I would be lying if I said I am not leaning towards just doing it.

[00:13:34] This disconnect with my sister brings immense discomfort in ways I cannot verbally express.

[00:13:39] But I see two frequent questions I want to answer to hopefully get different answers.

[00:13:43] Money.

[00:13:44] My mother did not die of natural causes.

[00:13:47] It was provider error.

[00:13:49] My father sued the hospital and my sister and I have sizable trust with that money.

[00:13:53] So money is not an issue for either of us.

[00:13:55] And her husband is financially well off as well.

[00:13:58] So not working for nine months or paying for the egg retrieval process etc.

[00:14:02] isn't an issue in any way.

[00:14:03] It's more so her stubbornness for the baby to share our DNA and for one of us to be carrying it.

[00:14:09] Because we're identical.

[00:14:10] If she can't have a baby, how can I?

[00:14:13] Her lack of being able to have a child is due to a car accident we were in.

[00:14:17] Which is also the source of the miscarriage she experienced.

[00:14:20] Due to her being in the front seat with our father, they took the brunt of the crash unfortunately.

[00:14:25] Her body is now unable to carry a child and she has had extreme complications with egg retrieval.

[00:14:30] I'm not sure about the details of how that has gone wrong.

[00:14:33] Just that is not working and not an option.

[00:14:35] It is hard to get her to discuss non-viable options so I can gain a better understanding.

[00:14:41] Doctors will not allow me to be a surrogate due to me not having a child.

[00:14:44] Thank you so much for this information.

[00:14:46] We have a family dinner this upcoming Thursday because we always watch football with our dads and significant others.

[00:14:52] We're sure this topic will come up if she decides to attend.

[00:14:55] I'm hoping I can bring this up to her.

[00:14:59] And look, I don't want to play down what the sister's going through with her thought process and all this kind of thing.

[00:15:05] She must be in a bad mental space.

[00:15:07] You know, coming to terms with not being able to have children.

[00:15:10] But the level of manipulation towards OP in this.

[00:15:13] Making them feel so bad that they're going to go through with this.

[00:15:15] This isn't a small thing.

[00:15:17] This is huge.

[00:15:17] And the fact that she got angry at you for when you said no the first time.

[00:15:22] You know, it's just wrong.

[00:15:24] She should have backed off immediately right then.

[00:15:28] And to say it's a small task is just like, it's mind-blowing to be quite honest.

[00:15:34] Nine months and, you know, the changes in your body and the way pregnancy can go.

[00:15:39] All sorts of different directions.

[00:15:41] The thoughts, the feelings, the hormones.

[00:15:43] Everything involved.

[00:15:44] It's huge.

[00:15:47] But DuckDuckGo says most doctors would refuse to allow you to be a surrogate if you not previously had children.

[00:15:53] She'd be hard-pressed to find one that would.

[00:15:56] Not to mention she's asking her sister to sacrifice her body and potentially her life to fulfill her dream.

[00:16:03] That's not fair at all.

[00:16:04] If she can afford IVF, she can afford a surrogate.

[00:16:07] Not the arsehole.

[00:16:09] SirHP says I'd also add that her losing her temper in this way

[00:16:13] scream she's not stable enough to enter this sort of relationship with.

[00:16:16] Not the arsehole.

[00:16:19] Delta Diva says she did it to manipulate her sister.

[00:16:22] If she has a kid, she'll manipulate its whole life to match her vision boards.

[00:16:26] Seductive Norma says not the arsehole.

[00:16:29] You are not the arsehole for refusing to be a surrogate for your sister.

[00:16:32] It's your body and you have the right to decide what to do with it.

[00:16:35] Your sister's reaction is unreasonable and manipulative

[00:16:38] and you shouldn't feel pressured into doing something you're not comfortable with.

[00:16:43] So, Opie comes in with their update and says,

[00:16:46] So, I promised an update tomorrow, but my dad actually ended up calling me while I was hanging out

[00:16:51] and told me to come over for dinner yesterday night so we could talk.

[00:16:54] I want to start by saying thank you all so much for all the comments and advice.

[00:16:58] Some of you were jerks to not only me, but my sister and boyfriend as well.

[00:17:02] I still appreciate the help.

[00:17:03] I didn't even ask about what when my dad called.

[00:17:06] I figured he had spoken to Stacy.

[00:17:09] Based on comments, I know you guys won't be happy,

[00:17:11] but I spoke with my boyfriend about where his head was if I were to go forward with it.

[00:17:16] He told me that he loved me and would support me through any and everything,

[00:17:19] but he would not continue to sit by while my sister made me feel like trash.

[00:17:23] And if I was doing this under coercion, he would not be able to support me,

[00:17:27] which I honestly completely understand.

[00:17:30] When we went over to my dad's for dinner, my sister and brother-in-law were already there.

[00:17:34] I spoke to them both when we walked in, but only my sister replied.

[00:17:37] My brother-in-law gave me the most disgusting look and greeted my boyfriend only.

[00:17:42] My dad sat us down at the table and there was just this awkward silence and tension I could cut with a butcher knife.

[00:17:48] He said,

[00:17:49] Somebody talk.

[00:17:50] We need to get this resolved before the game tomorrow night.

[00:17:53] My dad loves football lol.

[00:17:55] I started off the conversation by telling her that I did some research and atop of my initial concerns,

[00:18:01] I now had a few more and needed to know exactly what she needed from me.

[00:18:05] I first asked her what being a surrogate would look like.

[00:18:09] She said,

[00:18:09] Are you agreeing to it?

[00:18:11] When I told her no, I just needed more details, she broke down crying.

[00:18:15] I asked her if she knew that a doctor would deny me from being a surrogate

[00:18:18] given that I've never successfully carried a child to term.

[00:18:21] And she said she knew that and she would just send my brother-in-law and I to a center of excellence.

[00:18:27] We can pretend we're a couple and once I'm successfully inseminated,

[00:18:30] then I will request a transfer from that provider to her, Objin, with a continuation of care.

[00:18:36] My father intervened and said that asking me to do something a doctor wouldn't sign off on

[00:18:40] was a terrible way to attempt to begin motherhood.

[00:18:43] You could tell he wasn't on board with any of it, but didn't want to pick a side.

[00:18:47] He asked her why she was so uncomfortable with the idea of a surrogate.

[00:18:51] And that's when my brother-in-law interjected and said,

[00:18:54] Don't try to berate my wife with these stupid questions.

[00:18:57] Talk to your selfish bitch of a daughter about why she can't help her sister.

[00:19:01] That immediately shifted the mood.

[00:19:04] My boyfriend started to yell at him for calling me a bitch.

[00:19:07] My dad told him he could not disrespect his daughters in his home.

[00:19:11] Everything just went up in flames.

[00:19:12] My sister was crying asking me to do her this favor, practically begging.

[00:19:18] I told her that if I could trade places with her, I would.

[00:19:21] But I was scared and just didn't want to die.

[00:19:24] I think that was the first time I had said that out loud ever.

[00:19:27] We couldn't get more sold after that.

[00:19:29] My dad asked my brother-in-law to leave because he couldn't control himself and refused to apologize.

[00:19:34] When he was walking out, my sister told him she would meet him in the car.

[00:19:38] Asked me to come and talk to her on the porch, just the two of us.

[00:19:41] I went out with her and she apologized for her husband calling me a bitch.

[00:19:45] Said that they were just on edge and it's been stressful.

[00:19:48] I told her that she shouldn't apologize for him and that we're to figure something out.

[00:19:52] She asked me to reconsider and just kept saying,

[00:19:54] You don't get it. You don't understand.

[00:19:56] When I pressured her for more, she admitted that her in-laws made a cruel joke

[00:20:00] at one of their dinners recently about how she was a murderer,

[00:20:04] referring to the child she lost.

[00:20:05] She said she'd asked him why he didn't stand up for her when they made the joke

[00:20:09] and he said because it's true.

[00:20:11] He made some weird comments about her not being able to make up for it

[00:20:15] and how he was so excited to see what their child would look like

[00:20:18] and how we'd never be able to look into a child and see pieces of both of them.

[00:20:22] So she had the idea of me carrying the child and he was super on board.

[00:20:26] But the way she said it was like he planted a seed

[00:20:29] and she seems to believe it was her idea.

[00:20:31] She said she hadn't seen him that excited since the baby

[00:20:34] and she just needed my help to get everything back to normal.

[00:20:38] I tried to explain to her nothing would ever be normal again

[00:20:40] and that what she was trying to do was the wrong thing.

[00:20:44] But he just started blaring the horn and rushing her to the car

[00:20:47] and said she'd call me later.

[00:20:49] I feel like I may lose my sister,

[00:20:51] but I now am not even willing to donate my eggs for her to have the baby with him.

[00:20:55] I took your guys' advice and looked up the egg donation process

[00:20:58] and wow, not at all what I expected.

[00:21:01] I want her to divorce him.

[00:21:03] I'm never going to help her procreate with that man.

[00:21:05] I genuinely think I'd be a surrogate for her to be a single mum

[00:21:08] before I'd ever allow her to place his child in me

[00:21:11] or take my eggs to even create a child with him.

[00:21:14] I had no clue that his family was pushing so much guilt onto her.

[00:21:18] I've literally been jumping at my phone every time it rings

[00:21:21] because I know she'd be calling soon

[00:21:23] and I have to tell her that I'm terrified I'll lose my sister,

[00:21:26] but I can't and won't do this.

[00:21:28] Probably won't update anymore,

[00:21:30] but thanks for all your help.

[00:21:31] I'll probably create my own Reddit now

[00:21:33] because I'm kind of obsessed with this site.

[00:21:36] Jimmy Gregg says,

[00:21:37] What a manipulative bastard he is.

[00:21:39] Your sister should divorce and stay away from her in-laws.

[00:21:42] No wonder that man is that way.

[00:21:44] He needs therapy.

[00:21:45] ASAP.

[00:21:46] Owing says,

[00:21:47] OP showing some healthy backbone,

[00:21:49] about which there was some doubt in the first post.

[00:21:52] Assuming this is real,

[00:21:54] it's a super stressful situation,

[00:21:56] but she appears to be rising to the occasion.

[00:21:59] Arsehole seemed like an inadequate word

[00:22:01] to describe her sister's husband and his family.

[00:22:05] Hello, Junebug says,

[00:22:06] Wow.

[00:22:06] Can't believe her own husband called her a murderer

[00:22:08] for having a miscarriage.

[00:22:10] Hope she wakes up from the brainwashing.

[00:22:13] OP comes in with another update and says,

[00:22:15] I know I said I wouldn't update anymore,

[00:22:17] but so much has happened

[00:22:18] and I can't explain the weird relief I feel

[00:22:20] typing my madness onto this website.

[00:22:22] My friends did say that,

[00:22:24] my friend did say that I could have just had this,

[00:22:28] that I could just have this Reddit page,

[00:22:30] which,

[00:22:31] my friend did say that I could just have this Reddit page,

[00:22:33] or account I assume,

[00:22:34] which relieves so much stress

[00:22:35] because Lord knows I wouldn't have made one

[00:22:37] if I had to do it myself.

[00:22:39] I had to watch a YouTube

[00:22:40] on how to properly use this site

[00:22:42] and some of the things,

[00:22:43] and what some of the things mean

[00:22:44] because people kept on commenting

[00:22:45] that I was karma farming.

[00:22:47] That's neither here nor there.

[00:22:49] Onto the update.

[00:22:50] A lot of you suggested

[00:22:51] that I'd be more careful around my brother-in-law

[00:22:53] for fear that he would become violent.

[00:22:55] I did not listen

[00:22:56] and I kicked myself now for not doing so.

[00:22:58] I thought I knew my family well enough

[00:23:01] and this was just a bump in the road.

[00:23:03] How extremely naive of me.

[00:23:05] My sister called me back the next morning,

[00:23:07] the day after he called me a bitch.

[00:23:09] I unfortunately missed the call

[00:23:11] because I was in the shower.

[00:23:12] When I called back,

[00:23:14] no answer.

[00:23:15] It was a normal day

[00:23:16] until we got to my father's house

[00:23:17] that night for football.

[00:23:19] Kick-off had just happened

[00:23:20] when my sister walked in.

[00:23:22] She asked my dad

[00:23:23] if he could come outside

[00:23:24] and talk to her husband.

[00:23:25] My dad said no

[00:23:26] because the game was on

[00:23:28] and he could either wait

[00:23:29] until the commercial break

[00:23:30] or he could come in

[00:23:31] and apologize like a man

[00:23:32] in front of everyone

[00:23:33] who witnessed him disrespect me.

[00:23:35] She took a breath

[00:23:36] and told him

[00:23:37] how he wasn't being completely fair.

[00:23:39] She tried to bring up

[00:23:40] the previous situation

[00:23:41] drawing likeliness

[00:23:42] and it infuriated my father.

[00:23:45] He told her,

[00:23:46] how he didn't raise her

[00:23:47] to make herself small

[00:23:48] and weak for a man

[00:23:49] and said whatever he did

[00:23:50] that made her think

[00:23:51] this is how you have

[00:23:52] a healthy relationship.

[00:23:53] He was sorry for failing her

[00:23:55] as a father.

[00:23:56] Her eyes started to water

[00:23:57] and she just stormed out

[00:23:58] without another word.

[00:24:00] When I went out to my car

[00:24:01] after the game was over,

[00:24:02] I had two flat tires

[00:24:03] and a broken passenger front window.

[00:24:06] My dad put two donuts

[00:24:07] on the car

[00:24:08] and used his truck

[00:24:09] to tow the car

[00:24:09] into his garage

[00:24:10] and told me to take

[00:24:11] his other vehicle

[00:24:12] and he would get the car fixed

[00:24:14] and I could come

[00:24:15] and get it whenever I wanted.

[00:24:17] Whenever I had time

[00:24:18] but not to worry.

[00:24:19] He asked if I wanted

[00:24:20] to stay the night.

[00:24:21] I declined.

[00:24:24] I called my sister.

[00:24:25] She didn't answer

[00:24:26] so I texted her

[00:24:27] and said a lot.

[00:24:28] But for the sake of some

[00:24:39] some of it staying private.

[00:24:40] It was just a

[00:24:41] I can't believe

[00:24:42] this is where we are.

[00:24:44] Loving a man

[00:24:44] should never call

[00:24:45] for destroying your family

[00:24:46] in the process.

[00:24:47] She responded by saying

[00:24:49] that's the problem.

[00:24:50] My family is already destroyed

[00:24:51] and you aren't willing

[00:24:52] to help me put it together.

[00:24:54] I again tried to call her

[00:24:55] after that.

[00:24:56] No answer.

[00:24:57] On the drive home

[00:24:58] I noticed a car following me.

[00:25:00] When I was able

[00:25:01] to get a better view

[00:25:01] I realized it was

[00:25:03] my sister's

[00:25:03] mother-in-law's car.

[00:25:05] I know this only because

[00:25:06] she has a very distinct

[00:25:07] car decal

[00:25:08] that I had literally

[00:25:09] never seen anywhere else.

[00:25:11] I freaked out

[00:25:11] and called my boyfriend

[00:25:12] asking him to meet me

[00:25:14] back at my place.

[00:25:15] When I pulled up

[00:25:16] at my home

[00:25:16] into the driveway

[00:25:17] the car pulled in behind me.

[00:25:19] Luckily

[00:25:19] my boyfriend

[00:25:20] was turning down the street.

[00:25:22] By the time

[00:25:22] my brother-in-law

[00:25:23] got out of his mom's car

[00:25:24] and tried to

[00:25:24] and tried to walk to me

[00:25:26] my boyfriend

[00:25:27] was running out of his car

[00:25:28] to run out of his car

[00:25:29] yelling at him.

[00:25:31] Jeremiah immediately

[00:25:32] started yelling

[00:25:33] I just wanted to apologize

[00:25:34] I just wanted to apologize.

[00:25:36] Him and my boyfriend

[00:25:37] got into a small scuffle

[00:25:38] before he got into

[00:25:39] his mom's car

[00:25:39] and sped off.

[00:25:40] He did hit my boyfriend's car

[00:25:42] in the process.

[00:25:43] It didn't appear

[00:25:44] to be intentional

[00:25:44] and his car is still drivable.

[00:25:47] After this

[00:25:47] I obviously didn't feel

[00:25:48] too comfortable

[00:25:49] with my home anymore.

[00:25:50] I packed the bag

[00:25:51] and went to my boyfriend's house

[00:25:52] and haven't really

[00:25:53] been back home since.

[00:25:54] My dad did add a camera

[00:25:56] and floodlight

[00:25:56] to the back door

[00:25:57] and driveway.

[00:25:58] But I'm honestly

[00:25:59] not too sure

[00:25:59] I want to go back

[00:26:00] although I know

[00:26:01] I will have to

[00:26:02] at some point.

[00:26:03] Yes,

[00:26:03] I reached out

[00:26:04] to my sister.

[00:26:05] No,

[00:26:05] she did not answer

[00:26:06] or respond at all

[00:26:07] that night

[00:26:07] or the day following.

[00:26:10] After that

[00:26:10] I would notice

[00:26:11] that on one day

[00:26:12] a red car

[00:26:13] would be following me

[00:26:13] the next

[00:26:14] a black one.

[00:26:15] I know you may say

[00:26:16] I was scared

[00:26:16] and just thinking

[00:26:17] people were following me

[00:26:18] but I would notice them

[00:26:19] begin to drive

[00:26:20] to the police station

[00:26:21] per instruction

[00:26:22] from my dad

[00:26:23] just for them

[00:26:24] to then

[00:26:25] just for them

[00:26:26] to then turn

[00:26:27] once

[00:26:27] once the station

[00:26:28] was inside.

[00:26:29] On Sunday

[00:26:30] I went to brunch

[00:26:31] with a few friends

[00:26:32] to celebrate

[00:26:33] one's upcoming wedding

[00:26:34] and discuss

[00:26:35] bridal shower details.

[00:26:36] The waiter came to me

[00:26:37] and told me

[00:26:37] my husband was up front

[00:26:39] and it was emergency

[00:26:40] thinking it was my boyfriend

[00:26:41] and she was just mistaken.

[00:26:43] I go up

[00:26:43] to find my brother-in-law.

[00:26:45] I approached him

[00:26:46] in an attempt

[00:26:46] to not make a scene

[00:26:47] speaking low

[00:26:48] asking him to leave

[00:26:49] or I'd call my dad.

[00:26:50] He told me

[00:26:51] that everything

[00:26:51] just went too far

[00:26:52] and he just wanted

[00:26:53] to apologize.

[00:26:55] We were kind of

[00:26:56] in the doorway

[00:26:56] and it was just awkward

[00:26:57] people funneling in

[00:26:59] saying excuse me

[00:27:00] so I suggested

[00:27:01] we step out of the way.

[00:27:02] When we went outside

[00:27:03] he apologized

[00:27:04] for calling me a bitch

[00:27:05] and said he didn't

[00:27:06] feel that way.

[00:27:07] He told me

[00:27:07] I didn't understand

[00:27:08] how hard it was for him

[00:27:09] and I cut him off there

[00:27:10] saying that how hard

[00:27:11] it was for him

[00:27:12] didn't matter to me

[00:27:12] because his behavior

[00:27:13] was becoming too chaotic

[00:27:14] and abusive

[00:27:15] to not only my sister

[00:27:16] but everyone else.

[00:27:18] He told me

[00:27:18] that he understood

[00:27:19] how I could feel like that

[00:27:20] but asked me

[00:27:21] to again

[00:27:21] reconsider.

[00:27:23] It reached for my stomach

[00:27:24] and I instantly

[00:27:25] stepped back

[00:27:26] and told him

[00:27:26] he needed to leave

[00:27:27] and we could set up

[00:27:28] a time to talk

[00:27:29] with my dad

[00:27:29] but him stalking me

[00:27:30] was an issue

[00:27:31] and we could talk later

[00:27:32] or I would call the police.

[00:27:34] He grabbed a fistful

[00:27:35] of my hair

[00:27:36] as I was walking

[00:27:36] back into the restaurant

[00:27:37] saying don't you

[00:27:39] fucking walk away

[00:27:39] from me.

[00:27:41] Honestly

[00:27:41] I don't remember

[00:27:50] two days ago

[00:27:51] he tried to come up

[00:27:52] to my airport terminal

[00:27:53] telling them

[00:27:54] he was my husband

[00:27:55] and there was an emergency

[00:27:56] saying BS

[00:27:57] he pulled at the restaurant

[00:27:58] he was arrested

[00:27:59] after refusing to leave

[00:28:00] he was of course

[00:28:01] bailed out

[00:28:01] and has since

[00:28:02] taken to messaging me

[00:28:03] the most vile messages.

[00:28:05] My sister did leave

[00:28:06] after the show

[00:28:07] he put up my job

[00:28:08] she's currently

[00:28:09] staying with our dad

[00:28:10] but has been asking me

[00:28:11] to drop charges

[00:28:12] making excuses for him

[00:28:13] and has been very adamant

[00:28:14] that he didn't hit me

[00:28:15] at the restaurant

[00:28:15] despite my literal

[00:28:16] scalp bleeding

[00:28:17] because of how hard

[00:28:18] he yanked my hair

[00:28:19] and the small scratches

[00:28:21] I have in my neck

[00:28:21] and arms

[00:28:22] from him continuing

[00:28:23] to escalate aggressively

[00:28:24] when strangers

[00:28:25] tried to help.

[00:28:26] Some of the texts

[00:28:27] are him telling me

[00:28:27] the vile thing

[00:28:28] he's going to do to me

[00:28:29] how he'll get me pregnant

[00:28:31] and I'll be stuck

[00:28:31] with him for the rest

[00:28:32] of my life

[00:28:33] how he knows

[00:28:33] that I'm the woman

[00:28:34] who's going to bring

[00:28:35] him a son

[00:28:36] and if I don't make

[00:28:37] it easy for him

[00:28:37] we'll both die

[00:28:38] before he gives up

[00:28:39] just really concerning

[00:28:41] I blocked his number

[00:28:42] so all of these

[00:28:43] are coming from

[00:28:44] random text now apps

[00:28:46] told the police

[00:28:48] prove it's actually him

[00:28:49] so until he acts

[00:28:50] on it

[00:28:51] nothing can be done

[00:28:54] I am literally

[00:28:55] scared all the time

[00:28:57] my boyfriend drives

[00:28:58] me to work

[00:28:58] and on top of

[00:28:59] the regular precautions

[00:29:00] I think more

[00:29:01] and I can barely

[00:29:01] sleep now

[00:29:03] I send my sister

[00:29:04] a screenshot

[00:29:04] every time

[00:29:05] her husband

[00:29:05] messages me

[00:29:06] and she has taken

[00:29:07] to no longer

[00:29:08] interacting

[00:29:08] my dad has asked

[00:29:09] me to stop doing

[00:29:10] this because

[00:29:11] it's beating her

[00:29:11] down

[00:29:12] but I told him

[00:29:12] that I can't

[00:29:13] even believe

[00:29:13] she defended him

[00:29:14] during some of this

[00:29:15] and she needs

[00:29:16] to see the harassment

[00:29:17] that her husband

[00:29:17] is committing

[00:29:19] I feel defeated

[00:29:20] I don't even know

[00:29:21] if me and my sister

[00:29:22] can come back from this

[00:29:23] I feel like I've

[00:29:24] basically taken over

[00:29:25] my boyfriend's life

[00:29:26] and I feel terrible

[00:29:27] about it

[00:29:27] he hasn't said anything

[00:29:29] but his regular gym

[00:29:30] visits are cut

[00:29:31] sometimes if he has

[00:29:31] to pick me up

[00:29:32] or drop me off

[00:29:33] when I go to work

[00:29:34] or go anywhere else

[00:29:35] because I'm scared

[00:29:36] being gone for a day

[00:29:38] due to flights

[00:29:39] being gone for a day

[00:29:40] due to flights

[00:29:40] I know allows him

[00:29:42] to do more of his routine

[00:29:43] but now we're

[00:29:44] basically forced

[00:29:44] to live together

[00:29:45] which I enjoy

[00:29:46] but I'm not sure

[00:29:47] that he does

[00:29:48] we got into

[00:29:49] an argument

[00:29:49] the other day

[00:29:50] about the AC

[00:29:50] temperature

[00:29:51] I feel like my life

[00:29:53] is slowly devolving

[00:29:54] into madness

[00:29:55] and I can't breathe

[00:29:58] Actual apartment

[00:29:59] says I would unblock him

[00:30:00] and silence his number

[00:30:01] so you don't get

[00:30:01] notifications

[00:30:02] that way the police

[00:30:04] would know

[00:30:04] he's the one

[00:30:05] sending messages

[00:30:05] if he uses his number

[00:30:06] again

[00:30:07] and for your sister

[00:30:08] your relationship

[00:30:09] will never be the same

[00:30:10] again

[00:30:11] even if you find

[00:30:12] your way back

[00:30:12] to each other

[00:30:13] it will still be different

[00:30:14] and even though

[00:30:15] your father

[00:30:16] is helping you

[00:30:16] if he says

[00:30:17] something again

[00:30:18] about you messaging

[00:30:18] your sister

[00:30:19] what a husband

[00:30:19] is writing to you

[00:30:20] make him remember

[00:30:21] that your brother

[00:30:22] in law actually

[00:30:23] threatened to rape you

[00:30:23] and your sister

[00:30:24] is still with him

[00:30:25] a potential rapist

[00:30:27] Capo K says

[00:30:28] I wouldn't even say

[00:30:29] potential

[00:30:30] this is a future rapist

[00:30:31] he's completely unhinged

[00:30:32] you're so right

[00:30:34] Opie should unblock

[00:30:35] and mute his number

[00:30:36] I wonder if a lawyer

[00:30:37] would consult

[00:30:38] with her actions

[00:30:38] so she can take

[00:30:39] to make a proper

[00:30:40] legal paper trail

[00:30:41] cops will still

[00:30:42] not likely intervene

[00:30:43] until he causes

[00:30:44] physical harm

[00:30:44] even with threats

[00:30:46] I agree with

[00:30:47] absolutely everything

[00:30:48] you said

[00:30:48] quite literally

[00:30:49] took the words

[00:30:50] out of my mouth

[00:30:51] Jazz says

[00:30:52] your brother in law

[00:30:53] is stalking you

[00:30:54] and his delusion

[00:30:54] is that you

[00:30:55] will have his baby

[00:30:56] let that sink in

[00:30:57] because it's time

[00:30:58] for no contact

[00:30:59] I don't know

[00:31:00] for how long

[00:31:01] but long as it takes

[00:31:02] your brother in law

[00:31:03] is violent

[00:31:03] abusive

[00:31:04] and delusional

[00:31:05] your sister

[00:31:06] is beaten down

[00:31:07] because her husband

[00:31:08] wants her sister

[00:31:09] to have his baby

[00:31:09] and is stalking her

[00:31:11] like an episode of you

[00:31:12] can't reason with

[00:31:13] violent and delusional

[00:31:15] and that was Opie's

[00:31:17] last post on the

[00:31:18] matter so far

[00:31:19] absolutely terrifying

[00:31:21] and I know laws

[00:31:23] vary from country

[00:31:24] to country

[00:31:25] but it just again

[00:31:26] shows that

[00:31:27] laws on stalking

[00:31:28] and other things

[00:31:30] that we're seeing

[00:31:30] in this story

[00:31:31] the laws are just

[00:31:32] not where they need

[00:31:33] to be right now

[00:31:34] in regards to

[00:31:35] this stuff

[00:31:35] that guy clearly

[00:31:37] with his behavior

[00:31:38] the way it's

[00:31:38] escalating

[00:31:39] is a danger

[00:31:40] he is a danger

[00:31:42] there's no way

[00:31:42] about that

[00:31:43] whatsoever

[00:31:44] what he's already

[00:31:44] done so far

[00:31:45] he's pulled

[00:31:45] Opie's hair

[00:31:46] the threats

[00:31:47] he made

[00:31:48] terrifying

[00:31:49] that in itself

[00:31:50] should be enough

[00:31:51] right there and then

[00:31:52] but now

[00:31:53] I'm going to turn

[00:31:54] this one to you guys

[00:31:55] what do you guys

[00:31:56] make of this

[00:31:57] situation

[00:31:58] let us know

[00:31:58] your thoughts

[00:31:59] down in the

[00:32:00] comments below

[00:32:00] and just a huge

[00:32:02] thank you for

[00:32:02] being here today

[00:32:03] getting involved

[00:32:03] in the stories

[00:32:04] your love

[00:32:05] your support

[00:32:05] your time

[00:32:05] always means

[00:32:07] the absolute world

[00:32:07] to me

[00:32:08] and hopefully

[00:32:09] I'll see you

[00:32:09] in the next one

[00:32:10] take care

[00:32:11] and much love