My Partner EXPLODED When I Said I'd Cheat On "My Wife" For More Money & A Better Job r/Relationships

[00:00:02] Hallo zusammen, ich bin Janne, Host vom Podcast Unter uns gesagt und dort spreche ich jeden Dienstag mit prominenten Menschen wie Emilio Sakraja, Betty Taube, Valentina und Sheen Pade und vielen mehr über Themen, die uns wirklich beschäftigen. Und das mache ich auf eine besondere Art. Alle meine Gäste bringen ein Foto ihres Kühlschrankinhaltes mit und von dort wird es persönlich. Es wird gelacht, es wird geweint, es wird aber ganz sicher immer sehr echt. Wenn ihr also wissen möchtet, was bei euren Lieblingsstars so im Kühlschrank abgeht und ihre ganz persönliche Seite kennenlernen möchtet, dann kommt doch mal auf die Kühle.

[00:00:32] darüber zu unter uns gesagt, ich freue mich auf euch.

[00:01:05] Please excuse any poor grammar. English is my first language, I just don't like it. Fair enough. I, 23 female, and my girlfriend, 21 female, recently went to a family's house for an early Thanksgiving. My family are all amazing cooks and like to assign other people with stuff to bring. I, being a horrid cook, was assigned board games and paper plates.

[00:01:29] This was my first time being told to bring something and the first time girlfriend would be meeting my parents. So I decided to go all out. Me and my girlfriend went out to a local game store and bought a few things. Here's the important bit. I got the game of life. Call me nerdy, but I like the game so much because I role play and act as my character in game. My family likes to join in too sometimes. It escalates into full blown improv with a board game.

[00:01:59] However, I failed to tell girlfriend that I would be acting. That was definitely my bad. The evening was going great. I was introducing girlfriend to my family and they really seemed to like her. Then we busted out the games. We first played Monopoly, which I was also role playing with my brother, 28 male. Then we played life. I was a struggling French man who abandoned college to pursue his dreams. My brother was now my sister who went to college and hated me.

[00:02:28] My aunts and my brother's wife, BW, were a gang and girlfriend was just soaking it all in. At some point, brother's wife started to harass me because I married a pink peg. I can't quite remember how it devolved into me saying I'd cheat on the pink peg for more money and a better job, but I'm very aware I said it. And in a very poor French accent at that. I didn't think much of it, given that brother's wife was saying worse things about her blue peg.

[00:02:58] But on the drive home, girlfriend absolutely blew up on me. Not just loud stern talking too bad, but I had to pull over in a gas station parking lot because I couldn't focus bad. The girlfriend was mad because if I could do that to a pink peg, then what would I do to her for a better life? She also thought the French accent was offensive. My family is fully French and so am I, so that really confused me. Maybe it was offensive because it was bad.

[00:03:26] Since we were already at the gas station, I offered to go inside and grab her some snacks, but she denied and said she would come inside with me. I hoped we could talk it out while we shopped, but instead every time I'd pick something up, girlfriend asked if I would cheat on her for said item. We got home and she's been giving me the silent treatment ever since. This is the first time she's ever acted like this towards me. I asked some of our friends about it and I've got mixed opinions. Am I in the wrong here?

[00:03:55] Any advice on how to get her to talk to me again? For me reading this, I absolutely love the idea of role playing in a game like that and getting involved. And I think that's awesome. I'd be fully invested in that. I gotta tell you. But clearly your girlfriend has some major insecurity and control issues going on. The fact that she can't distinguish between you playing a character in a game of life and is questioning your values over it is concerning.

[00:04:24] Followed by a little bit of manipulation with the silent treatment. And also, let's not forget the meltdown where you had to actually pull over to a gas station because you couldn't concentrate she was going on so much. Yeah. Unique Aberration says, maybe you should have explained beforehand but it's literally a fucking plastic peg. I would cheat on it too. And I'm asexual. Not the arsehole. Ghost says, I hate cheaters but for the game, I would too.

[00:04:54] It's not reality. For the game, I would put a pink peg in and I'm straight because it's a game and doesn't reflect reality. What's Paul Playing says, yeah. This feels like a mountain of insecurities wrapped up in a person. Someone who could do with a good, long bout of therapy and self-examination. Asriel Woods says, your girlfriend's a fucking moron. Who either cannot separate fact from fiction or is looking for a fight.

[00:05:22] She's going to do this again and she's going to do it a lot. Do you want this? Because it's unlikely you can change her. I'd dump her. She sounds toxic as hell and dumb as a brick. How long until she does this in front of your family? No girl is worth that stress. And one more comment from neither entrance who says for real. Bad relationship compatibility. OP, you want to play board games and have fun acting. Girlfriend can't handle separating board gameplay from reality.

[00:05:51] I was willing to give girlfriend a chance if it was a reality based questions game. But you were playing life. Pegs in a car. I put my real life children, ages 6 and 7 at the time, into medical debt. Go to college. Become a doctor. Destroy lives. My actual children were more mature than your girlfriend. That's embarrassing. Better to find someone who vibes with you than fights with you over a simple board game.

[00:06:17] And before we go into the update, what would you roleplay as in the game of life? I'm really curious. Randomly, my roleplay character that popped into my head would be some like, you know, the New York style gangsters that you see in the movies. And they go, hey! Usually called like Big Frank or Big Tony or something like that. But gets very emotional about everything he bumps into. Like he gets a new family.

[00:06:45] With a gangster talk kind of ways. All about family, you know, Vin Diesel style. Don't ask me why my head went down that road. But anyway, six weeks later, OP comes in with an update and says, Hello, I posted here around Thanksgiving about a situation between me and my girlfriend. Thank you guys for the advice. It helped me have an important talk that girlfriend and I needed to have. Here's a super quick rundown of the original posts.

[00:07:12] I, 23 female and my girlfriend, 21 female, went to my family's house for an early Thanksgiving. Her and I brought the game of life instead of a dish. And the game ended up with me and my family acting as our game characters. In character, I said I'd cheat on the pink peg I married for more money and a better job. On the way home, girlfriend started screaming at me for what I said and then gave me the silent treatment. Am I the asshole? A few days after the original post, I asked girlfriend to sit down on the couch with me and discuss the situation.

[00:07:41] It was like talking to a rock. She just sat there with her arms crossed as I talked how much I disliked the silent treatment. I ended up with saying, if refusing to talk to me is the only way you'll face problems, then it may be best if we break up. That caught her attention because she started screaming at me again about how breaking up over something so little was immature and that I was blowing this entire thing out of proportion. The entire argument ended with her storming out of our house and screaming that we were over.

[00:08:11] That happened at the beginning of this month. And I wasn't going to update but something happened last night that made me post this. She hadn't moved her stuff out and asked me to come over while I was gone to collect it. I told her she could come over that evening. When I returned home, multiple of my things, books, clothes, hair products, jewelry and dishes were gone. Including my cat and none of his stuff. I'm so stressed. He's an F1 Savannah cat. I just googled that cat.

[00:08:41] Google it if you're able to. It looks like a bloody leopard. And Google says they can be worth between $1,000 up to $20,000 with the F1 being at the higher end. Holy moly. OP continues. And since she's staying at a friend's apartment, I know he has no space and zero enrichment. I'm thankful that he had tear the place to shreds, but they don't have the means to take care of him and he may be in danger. If you have any advice on how I get my cat back, I would greatly appreciate it.

[00:09:10] I'm devastated that I may spend new years without him. I'm trying to imagine a situation where someone took Poppy and I think there would be only two options for me. And you know, first, well the second option may come first, but first what you should do is call the police. Tell them the situation. Get your cat back ASAP. But second and more likely would happen straight away as I'd be through that door and getting the cat back immediately. Or Poppy in my scenario.

[00:09:37] And I'm sure many people would be doing the same with their pets as well. But mini reader says police non emergency line. Dave says call the police have proof of ownership of the cat ready for them and ask for an escort to collect your property. Just in case you didn't learn the lesson. Never allow someone into your dwelling while you're not there. I do love the word dwelling. I use that more often in conversation. Anyway, what do you guys make of this situation? Like I said before, I've got two questions for you on this one.

[00:10:07] Who would your character be in the game of life? And what would you do about OP situation? How would you deal with it? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And let's move on to another story. Now our next story comes from the co-worker stories subreddit from AJ who says, Coworker appears to be using my traumatic emergency to undermine me at work. I've 29 female officially had it.

[00:10:33] I'm commencing a campaign of relatively benign psychological warfare against one of my co-workers. I call him Dan. Dan started at the company in November 23rd and seemed cool at first, but I've slowly grown to find him very annoying. There are too many examples to get into, but I'll describe him as an entitled impertinent sourpuss with a nicotine addiction and a self-professed problem with following the rules. What the fuck?

[00:11:02] Why would you brag about this at work? He's my same age and role. For the record, I also arguably have a nicotine addiction, but I don't make it obvious in my fucking place of work. So, a few days ago I regrettably had a horrifying emergency on my way into work. The whole ordeal unfolded very quickly and while I was unmuted on a work call with my whole team. I don't want to go into details of the emergency, but it involved me getting caught up in an altercation that had nothing to do with me.

[00:11:31] It resulted in me having a very public panic attack that my entire work team also heard over the phone. I'm diagnosed with panic disorder. Wenn ihr Fans von True Crime und mehr seid und ihr früher vielleicht sogar X-Faktor das Unfassbar geguckt habt, dann wird euch unser Grusel- und Mystery-Podcast zum Mitraten Geschichten aus dem Altbau sicher gefallen. Josh und ich erzählen in jeder Folge zwei gruselige oder übernatürliche Geschichten

[00:12:00] und ihr dürft am Ende jeder Folge miträtseln, ob die Geschichten einen wahren Kern haben oder ob wir uns die ausgedacht haben. Die Auflösung gibt es dann immer in der Folge-Episode. Anhören tut sich das Ganze dann in etwa so. Moin und herzlich willkommen bei Geschichten aus dem Altbau. Ich bin was ganz perfidem auf der Spur. Dem Grusel-Podcast mit dem X-Faktor. Ihr lernt hier auch einfach was. Voller schauriger Ereignisse. Mysteriöser Vorkommnisse. Und unerklärbare Phänomene. Meine Geschichte trägt den Titel Quid.

[00:12:29] Quo. Stubenarrest. Du bist hier der Liebling. Ich bin immer nur der zum Draufhauen. Es war ihr Vater. Ein Mark erschütternder Schrei in Folie. Er grinste sie an. Ich sag, du hast es ausgedacht. Kann so eigentlich nicht passiert sein. Die Geschichte ist falsch. Das ist kein Wort, das sagt man so nicht.

[00:12:54] Das ist ein Moment. Das ist kein Mal. Das ist kein Mal. Das ist ein Mal. I had access to my prescribed medications. You can pass your judgment on whether I deserved it,

[00:13:22] but you don't fucking know me. My other co-workers, my family, my friends, and the larger local community, not the cops, have been extremely supportive. Think what you want, but fuck the police, and I'll probably never be able to trust them again. I was indisposed, edit, in jail, for a couple of days after the emergency. And once I was able to return, my work computer was still in my office building, which I ultimately never reached. So I couldn't do any actual work

[00:13:49] beyond sending emails and messages off my phone. Almost all of my co-workers, who I've worked with for about seven years now at this company, were incredibly supportive, sent me kind messages, and were generally concerned for my well-being. I haven't directly heard me go through this ordeal in real time, and I still feel mortified, so the support really means the world. A few co-workers even contacted every single person I'd scheduled meetings with to let them know I had

[00:14:15] an emergency. They seamlessly picked up my critical work tasks and offered to drop off my computer at home for me. I mean, these people rock, and that's why I've been at the company for seven years. Dan, however, has appeared to have seized upon this opportunity, my traumatic emergency, to highlight my shortcomings. In the immediate aftermath of the emergency, when my co-workers were exchanging messages of support and concern about me.

[00:14:41] Dan sent no such messages, and he didn't ask how he could support. Instead, he inserted an absolutely useless recommendation into the team group chat about how I could have avoided this emergency in the first place. He immediately tried to turn my trauma into a learning moment, as if it was so obvious that this would have happened to me because of the choices I made leading up to it. Very, she was asking for it in that dress, if you ask me. Gross.

[00:15:09] Then, I am finally recuperated enough, edit, out of jail, to look at my phone a couple of days after the emergency. I get a message from a PM that I work with, asking me about the status of a report that I had put Dan in charge of. The PM tells me that they spoke with Dan yesterday, and that Dan said the report was in my court. But interestingly enough, Dan conveniently failed to mention to the PM during that conversation that I had suffered a major emergency, that Dan had witnessed just the

[00:15:38] day before, that I was presently indisposed, and that I would likely need some time to recover. Not to mention, Dan had never communicated to me prior to the emergency that the report was ready for me to review. He kept saying he had one more task to complete, so fuck him. Despite the chaos and trauma of that terrible event, I feel a renewed sense of gratitude for my life, my freedom, and the everyday privilege of being alive and surrounded by a supportive community. And I feel even more

[00:16:07] protective of it now. Things can change in an instant in ways that you couldn't possibly imagine. I truly do not have any more time for bullshit. And for this reason, I feel absolutely justified in cancelling Dan from my life. I'm not going to try to get him fired or anything like that, but I refuse to spend my days in close proximity to him in the office. We currently sit right next to each other in a two-desk office space. But there are other desks in an adjacent office space that I can use,

[00:16:35] so I plan to move my desk away from his. He can say goodbye to any and all opportunities to support me on my projects. I no longer trust him to be a reliable and respectful team player. And most importantly, if he decides to confront me, which he might because he's actually alarmingly confrontational, I will calmly explain to him that I find his professionalism and working style to be unaligned with what I'm looking for on my projects and in my career. He'll have to find someone else to work

[00:17:02] with. Good luck, you piece of shit. That's all. Thanks for listening. So some of the comments on this one said, DaveCG says fuck it, sink him. Communicate to the PM his messages about one more task to complete and express your surprise that he didn't mention this when the PM asked him about it, especially with his awareness that you'd be unavailable for several days and disengage from him in the workplace. Opie says this is precisely the plan. Thank you for your

[00:17:30] support. Pleasant Mouse says crucify him the first chance you get. Throw him under the bus every chance you have. Shine a light on his mistakes, failures, shortcomings, and make him look as bad as he tried to make you look. Good luck, and I hope you're doing better now. Opie says absolutely diabolical. I love it. Thank you. I am feeling much better. A few more tough days ahead, I'm afraid, but I'm taking it day by day. Mountain Girl says you're an inspiration. I'm sending grandma hugs your way.

[00:18:00] Opie says ah, thank you so much, and Mountain Girl replies saying you're very welcome. I'm so sorry you had to go through such a traumatic event, and honestly, as a mother of three daughters, I'm so incredibly impressed with how you're handling all of this. Well done. Opie responded saying oh my god, I'm an oldest sister of three daughters. I was almost like wait, mum? My mum isn't a grandma quite yet. Soon though. Mountain Girl replies saying I'm not actually a grandmother either. My daughters are

[00:18:27] more than old enough, but I have two of them that are like no way at all, and my oldest is like maybe in the next couple of years. So I always say I'll send your grandma hugs because I'm old enough to be one. But I honestly could care less if I ever become, not because it makes me feel old or anything. But I absolutely don't want my kids to think somehow my life revolves around them and or what they do with their lives or me being a grandma. If they want kids, I want them to have them. If they don't, I couldn't care less. Which I must admit seems so shocking to ladies my age,

[00:18:57] because when I tell them this, they look at me like, how can you say that? I just have a great time with my daughters. I think they are funny and smart and intelligent. They're amazing people in their own right. I just love spending time with them. Opie says you sound just like my mum. Thanks for your words of encouragement. Then Opie goes on to clarify about what got her arrested. They said it definitely wasn't an accident, but I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I was profiled as

[00:19:25] someone the police wanted to target and they targeted me without bothering to check themselves. Then quote saying, having spent 36 hours in jail talking with multiple other women, you would be surprised at how many are there that haven't any idea why. And it's not because they're on drugs. And then says, since you asked, I was trying to help someone and was mistakenly and forcibly arrested by the police while they're raiding a protest that I was not taking part in. The protest

[00:19:51] was right outside my office building, which I was trying to get to. I was thrown in jail for 36 hours, which is why I was indisposed. I wasn't given access to my prescribed medication. And in addition to the panic attack, I suffered during the arrest, I had about five more over the next 12 hours, all while being totally ignored and laughed at by officers who were supposed to keep me safe. By the time I got out of jail, I was a zombie and I couldn't even spell my own name.

[00:20:18] Also, my job does involve manual labor. I work on construction sites, install wells and perform sampling. I'm trained to operate man lifts, nuclear density gauges and handle hazardous substances. Man, you're just wow. Opie comes in with an update two months later. And says, felt like posting an update. See original post. All my charges for misdemeanor for resisting

[00:20:46] arrest were dismissed because the police arrested me unlawfully. I'm also moving forward with civil litigation against the police department. Thought about just dropping it and moving on with my life. But then I saw the police body cam footage and it is disturbing to say the least. Worse than I even remembered. It brought my partner and father to tears. They're not criers. My mother was simply hysterical and couldn't even get through the first few minutes.

[00:21:12] She said watching her child being held down and beaten while I was crying and screaming for help was entirely too much for her to bear. I'm shaking again and even recounting it now. Dan still works at my company. But we don't work together on anything anymore. I heard he just got to put on a pip but no one really confirmed that with me. Which is probably the appropriate course of action. I'd just stay out completely of his business. I'm doing great at work. I've always felt

[00:21:38] good about my job slash performance because as I mentioned in the original post, I love my co-workers and my work really matters to me. I also stopped drinking and smoking and I'm currently 10 days sober which has been amazing for my productivity and my mental health. Still addicted to nicotine? Amzins? But that's the next thing to go. Taking it one step at a time. Thanks to all the kind internet strangers for your support. Apparently my story will soon be made public to the media

[00:22:05] but hopefully you don't hear about it because the video is still mortifying for me. Even though I clearly did nothing wrong. Other than panic. Which isn't really wrong given the circumstances. Plus then my identity will be exposed and I'll have to make a new reddit account. Hope Dan doesn't have reddit and find this but at this point he knows what I think about him. Hi Dan. Reasonable Star says it will all work out. You have a good attitude despite the awful ordeal you

[00:22:32] experienced. If it happens to be made public, the people who care about you are who matter. Great view for quitting drinking and smoking. That's amazing. Keep on one step at a time. One day at a time. Take care. We're pulling for you. Now I know it's not kind of the point of the whole post and the topics covered here but if I was a higher up in that company and Dan was playing games with you know potential clients

[00:22:57] I'd be really pissed off about that. It just sounds like a fast track way to lose clients but what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories. Your love, your support, your time. It always means the absolute world to me. So thank you so so much for being involved and hopefully I'll see you in the next one. Take care and much love.