My Family Betrayed Me And Then Gave Away A Family Heirloom Intended For Me r/Relationships

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[00:00:36] Hey, waffle gang. I do hope you're well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more

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[00:00:52] Much love guys. Now today's first story comes from the entitled parents subreddit.

[00:00:58] Yeah, we're going there. From miserable piglet 847 and says my parents want to give my sister

[00:01:04] the earrings my grandma left for me. This story is so weird. When I 27 female was 20 years old,

[00:01:14] I was in a relationship slash friends with benefits situation with a guy now 40 male.

[00:01:20] It was messy. We were on and off for almost five years. It was always clear he wasn't ready for

[00:01:26] a relationship. And I was always clear. I was madly in love with him. Every time I got tired

[00:01:32] of the situation and wanted to leave somehow, it convinced me to stay because love is free.

[00:01:39] We have so much time together and he wasn't ready for commitment. I asked advice of my sister,

[00:01:45] now 42 female, and she gave me some crappy advice that made him compromise, leave stuff at his

[00:01:53] place and basically turn him into a boyfriend until it was too late for him to say no.

[00:01:58] I never managed to do that because I wanted him to love me as much as I loved him, not trap him.

[00:02:05] During the last night I spent at his place, he said he wanted to try something more serious with me,

[00:02:11] talked about some dates he planned, etc. Only to ghost me forever. It was hard. This was the first

[00:02:19] person I loved and he treated me like crap. Six months passed and my sister came home.

[00:02:26] We both lived with our parents. Saying she wanted to introduce her brand new boyfriend.

[00:02:32] She's had a ton of boyfriends but she said this was the one. It was a dinner only with my parents

[00:02:38] at our home so I was excluded and expected to just go chill out or chill in my room.

[00:02:43] The day came and while they were dining, I ordered a pizza and came downstairs only to find the guy

[00:02:49] I was with 6 months prior with my parents and sister. I was shocked but paid for my pizza and

[00:02:57] went to my room again to cry. After dinner was over, I confronted my sister in front of our

[00:03:02] parents and begged her not to be with him. To be loyal to me, her little sister. There was no way

[00:03:08] she didn't know who he was. I showed her pictures of him, his social media, where he worked and

[00:03:15] she even knew where he lived. They never met because he didn't want to meet my family and

[00:03:20] never introduced his. But she knew who he was and she excluded me from that dinner because she knew.

[00:03:28] She said they met by chance after we stopped seeing each other. She knew how hard that rupture

[00:03:34] was. She knew how painful it was to not have even closure. He just stopped replying,

[00:03:41] not even blocking me, just left me there wondering after 5 years. She knew that during

[00:03:46] those 6 months I was still hurting. I know how it was my fault. I was too naive and thought that if

[00:03:51] I stayed long enough he would be ready for the relationship I wanted and would learn to love me.

[00:03:57] Stupid, I know. She defended herself saying it was a coincidence and chemistry was there. She

[00:04:04] loved him and she wasn't going to lose the love of her life. This stuff only happens once in a lifetime.

[00:04:11] I was in my early 20s, I would believe that. However, now I know that there are 8 billion people

[00:04:17] in this world. There's no one love of your life. You can find the love of your life multiple times

[00:04:22] if you look for it. My parents sided with her and said I should get over it since we never had

[00:04:28] a real relationship. 1 and a half years have passed. I've been excluded from multiple family

[00:04:34] gatherings because he would be around and my family thinks I will bring negative vibes since

[00:04:39] I'm still bitter about everything. I have no feelings for him but I feel betrayed by my sisters

[00:04:45] and my parents. He is just a piece of shit in my eyes now. My sister is now 6 months pregnant.

[00:04:52] Due to her age she has been extremely pampered by my parents. She still lives at home and is

[00:04:57] going to move with him maybe 2 months after the baby is born, then she's going to marry.

[00:05:03] My culture is normal if a woman gives birth and moves back or stays with her mom so the mom will

[00:05:09] help with the baby for the first months. A week ago my sister's friends made a surprise baby

[00:05:15] shower. I happened to be at home and tried to talk to them, I don't know why, maybe because

[00:05:20] my sister and I were so close before and I'm sad we're no longer friends. But her friends acted

[00:05:26] like I wasn't there and only replied to me with hmm yes no or silence as I was the one that created

[00:05:33] this mess or I was a homewrecker or I tried to seduce my sister's man. I was planning to move

[00:05:40] already, I was saving money etc but after that I left immediately to a friend's house. I'm in the

[00:05:46] process to find my own place. 2 days ago I received a call from my parents asking me to have a talk.

[00:05:53] I went to their house and they informed me that the diamond earrings my grandma left me will be

[00:05:57] given to my sisters. Those earrings have been in my family for 4 generations and before my grandma

[00:06:04] died she said the earrings will be mine and my sister will receive a gold necklace. Grandma trusted

[00:06:10] my parents with the earrings, there was no will or anything she just asked to give it to me when I was

[00:06:15] mature enough to appreciate and take care of a family heirloom. Now my parents think my sister

[00:06:21] is going to get married first and is having my grandma's first great grandchild and my sister

[00:06:26] should have it. I'm really mad now, they're robbing me of something my grandma left to me.

[00:06:34] I don't think my parents are evil, I think they were worried my sister wouldn't marry due to her

[00:06:39] age. Again in my culture a single woman in her 40s is something to worry for a family and now that

[00:06:46] she's forming a family they want to reward her with everything. But I was the closest to my grandma

[00:06:53] she made it clear the earrings will be mine not my sisters, not the first one to marry or have a

[00:06:58] child but mine. After 2 years of being excluded in favor of my sisters I gave the ultimatum to

[00:07:04] my parents, they give the earrings to me as my grandma intended or I'll cut them from my life

[00:07:09] forever. Not gonna lie the idea of cutting my family off is too painful but I feel they already

[00:07:15] made me and still makes me so wrong I don't want them in my life anymore. I feel a little shallow

[00:07:21] fighting over this but those are the only things my granddad left so they are not entitled to them.

[00:07:27] Now Opie talked a lot about culture in this one particular story I wonder what culture

[00:07:33] accepts infidelity because I'm fairly confident that this is the reason he ghosted you that

[00:07:39] he started sleeping with your sister or something along those lines. Again I don't know the full

[00:07:46] in and out it's just one of those you know spider senses tingling there. But the level of betrayal

[00:07:53] in one post I know it's going to be difficult for Opie so I don't want to downplay that at all you

[00:08:00] know we grow up with these people we're normalized by these people but these people have still

[00:08:05] betrayed you massively they've been abusive towards you by the sounds of it and they continue to treat

[00:08:12] you shitty. You know your sister brought this man who everyone knew was your ex into life and instead

[00:08:18] of you know trying to support you and say hell no this can't be happening they sort of welcomed him

[00:08:23] in and pushed you to the side. It just shows you where you stand with these people and that's

[00:08:30] absolutely heartbreaking for you and I'm so sorry that you are having to deal with that especially

[00:08:35] with the heirloom as well that's rightfully yours. Part of me just wants to say and I know it's very

[00:08:41] easy for me to say as always I'm not in that position I don't know the ins and outs of every

[00:08:45] small detail that's going on what you've been through etc. A part of me just wants to say

[00:08:50] if you're able to like likes always suggested in these posts getting all your important stuff

[00:08:55] getting those earrings and you know just getting out of that situation if you can. These people

[00:09:01] aren't showing you any love they're absolutely awful and it breaks my heart for you but Library

[00:09:07] Mouse says get your hands on those earrings and keep them safe. They're yours and should be in

[00:09:11] your possession by now ask nicely and if she doesn't give them up tell her you will sue and do

[00:09:18] it. Just popped into my head part of me would want to ask them and you know I'd probably still get a

[00:09:24] rubbish answer from them but just out of my curiosity I'm not saying OP should do it I'd

[00:09:29] want to confront them and say what would grandma think of your behavior right now? What are you

[00:09:33] doing? It'd probably still be a negative outcome but I'm always wondering about that kind of thing

[00:09:38] but Messy Red Panda says your parents and your sister are acting horribly towards you. Those

[00:09:43] earrings are yours and you should put your foot down and get them. I understand they're doing

[00:09:49] everything they can to get her married and situated because it's shameful that she is single

[00:09:53] at her age. For your culture not in the real world and for me. But they are throwing you out and

[00:09:59] disrespecting you in the process. As painful as it will be for you to cut them out they have

[00:10:04] already discarded you. Slab Beef Punch says I'm going to say it your parents are shitty and abusive

[00:10:11] they will not give you those earrings I guarantee it. You're still in the fog so you won't believe

[00:10:17] me even though deep down you know it's true. If I sound harsh it's because I'm incredibly angry

[00:10:23] on your behalf. I'm also sad for you. You deserve loving, kind, supportive parents.

[00:10:29] Unfortunately you didn't get that. You're craving that so strongly that you force yourself to

[00:10:34] pretend they love you despite the many ways they've proven you don't matter to them.

[00:10:39] They're about to throw you away and it will destroy you. And that is just so awful and sad.

[00:10:45] I hope you have close friends who can support you emotionally. Aroma Lover says my opinion

[00:10:50] he ghosted you when she started to sleep with him. I was wondering what culture approves of

[00:10:55] a single woman getting pregnant and giving birth before marriage. The real fear is that after he

[00:11:01] walks away from her after the kid is born he's not going to marry her. Which ones will be selling

[00:11:07] those earrings? Opie Respond saying I'm not saying my culture is extremely strict but there are

[00:11:12] things that mostly old people hold. You live with your parents until you leave your house in a white

[00:11:18] dress to marry and you must be a virgin. But since nobody marries virgin it's okay if you just

[00:11:23] married. But if you don't marry yet at least have a child until it is late. Like I'm 27 and my grand

[00:11:29] aunt called me to say happy birthday and remind me since I was turning 27 my train is about to

[00:11:34] depart. And this great aunt who had two kids who did not know their father because she was 30 and

[00:11:39] childless. So it was better to be a single mother than to say dress as saints. This is something

[00:11:45] in younger generations are leaving behind for sure. But a big part of our culture is that

[00:11:49] your own blood comes first no matter what family is family. I guess my sister and my parents chose

[00:11:55] to ignore this. It's morally grey or hypocritical because you take what suits you. T64 says I guess

[00:12:04] you didn't get any of the jewelry. Your parents and sister showed you what kind of people they

[00:12:08] are and how they felt about you. Do you still live near them? I would have moved with no forwarding

[00:12:14] address and cut all ties. If you do get married I would think twice about letting anyone in your

[00:12:19] family know about it. If you have children I think your parents will always treat their first

[00:12:23] grandchild better. How could your sister have started seeing this man knowing that he was your

[00:12:28] ex? Also I think your parents are assholes for going along with this. Is the only reason they

[00:12:33] didn't care about your feelings is because they wanted grandchildren and were afraid that your

[00:12:38] sister would be an old maid. Hopi says they probably were too worried my sister was getting

[00:12:44] old for babies and I was only 25 so I had more time. I don't know. Every time I asked why they

[00:12:50] sided with her without having some sympathy for me, they said my relationship with this man wasn't

[00:12:55] anything formal but still this man was fucking me for 5 straight years and then went for my sister.

[00:13:01] And a final comment from Nearly Pointless who says while I agree that your sister dating and

[00:13:06] marrying your shitty ex is distasteful, it doesn't play into the equation about the earrings.

[00:13:11] Grandma said they were for you. Anyone choosing to ignore that memory of your grandmother yet

[00:13:16] saying the birth of the grandchild will please grandmother so we're going to dishonor her desires

[00:13:20] by ignoring her wishes is lying. They're doing this to please themselves about this grandchild.

[00:13:26] I'm sorry your parents' integrity is compromised on this topic. The logic just doesn't hold up.

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[00:14:23] A couple of bits of relevant information which I left. Opie said grandma left no will.

[00:14:27] She handed her jewelry and most of them were family heirlooms to everybody.

[00:14:31] My grandma was the fourth generation with them. I was 12 when my grandma died. She gave the

[00:14:37] earrings to my mom so I could have them when I was ready to take care of them properly.

[00:14:41] I always thought I would wear them on my wedding day or a very special day.

[00:14:45] Since I lived with my parents not so long ago, I never asked them because mom has them in a safe

[00:14:50] in her room with other important stuff. I don't know if they would care. I think they don't believe

[00:14:56] they are doing nothing wrong handing the earrings to their sister that is having grandma's first

[00:15:01] great grandchild. But if grandma wanted that, she would have stated the sister that has the

[00:15:06] first child must receive the earrings. She said they were mine. Honestly, entitlement.

[00:15:13] On the back of that, Opie started talking about if she had access to the safe. Opie says yes,

[00:15:18] I still have keys from the house. I'm worried that if I take them there will be legal consequences.

[00:15:24] I have a text from my mom admitting the earrings were meant for me. I could use our extended family

[00:15:29] that knows our grandma's last wishes and I don't think it will be enough. Opie updated the post

[00:15:35] 5 months later and says this is old but I keep receiving messages every once in a while

[00:15:40] asking for an update. Yes, I got the earrings. After my post, I went to my parents house,

[00:15:46] opened the safe, took the earrings and left. Then after that I went again. Told my parents I needed

[00:15:52] time to process stuff and be on my own, gave their house keys and said I was leaving for good.

[00:15:57] There were some tears from my mom saying she couldn't believe I was such a bitter person.

[00:16:02] She raised me better. I was turning my back on my family over nothing. And finally that it was

[00:16:09] shameful that I left the family house without being married or anything. So it was never about

[00:16:14] me or she loving me or anything but social pressure to keep an outdated tradition. My dad

[00:16:21] was very neutral, gave me a hug and wished me luck. For 2 months nothing happened and I barely

[00:16:28] had contact with my family. Found a place to live and tried to heal. Had real fun decorating my new

[00:16:34] home, your normal stuff. And then everything happened at once. For 2 months my sister and mom

[00:16:41] never reached out to me. Only my dad sent me a text once a week asking how I was and wishing

[00:16:47] I was doing well. And then my sister's boyfriend slash future husband slash also my ex started to

[00:16:53] follow me on instagram again. I found it weird but anyway after all he's my sister's boyfriend and

[00:17:00] father of my niece, future brother in law, future my ex friend with benefits. Then he started to

[00:17:06] like my stories and then replying to them with heart emojis and looking good. This happened

[00:17:13] 3 times maybe? When I received the voicemail from my mom calling all sorts of names for going after

[00:17:19] a man that I knew was engaged. This was some kind of revenge over my poor sister that I was causing

[00:17:25] her so much stress, her blood pressure level was over the moon. I was an inconsiderate femme fatale

[00:17:32] and she raised me better. Later I learned through a cousin that my sister took her fiance's cell

[00:17:38] and found several conversations with several women including his attempts to talk to me.

[00:17:43] So of course she went to my mom crying about me trying to steal her fiance. All messy to be honest.

[00:17:51] Less than a week later another voicemail from my mom asking me where the fuck are the earrings.

[00:17:56] She went looking after them and when she couldn't find them deduced it was me. She called me a thief,

[00:18:02] a disgrace, dishonored me and said they didn't consider me family anymore. I was dead to them

[00:18:09] and she will be taking legal actions against me for the theft if it was possible. I had no option

[00:18:15] but to block her and my sister and other family members that sided with them. My dad later texted

[00:18:21] me to let me know my mom went nuts and they won't take any legal action. By the end of the last month

[00:18:28] my cousin texted me saying my sister had given birth to my niece. I know I shouldn't but I did

[00:18:34] it. I went to the hospital with a gift while wearing my beautiful and fancy earrings. I was

[00:18:39] kicked out of course but it was worth it. I have no plans to see them ever again, well maybe my dad.

[00:18:46] Also my cousin big gossiper that girl let me know my sister is getting married in May so she will

[00:18:52] have a happy ever after after all. But I'm also living my best life right now.

[00:19:00] Man just the absolute level of denial from that family.

[00:19:05] Opie said in their very last line that they're living their happy ever after but are they really?

[00:19:12] Is this guy really going to stay faithful? It doesn't sound like it to me.

[00:19:18] Opie also mentioned that they may keep in touch with their dad which when I read it I was like

[00:19:23] yeah I could probably see that but then I thought no this guy has also enabled this behavior hasn't

[00:19:28] called anyone out for treating Opie in this way at all. And has just passively sat in the background

[00:19:35] while his daughter has been treated in this in this way. Maybe there's more to that that's going

[00:19:41] on with his side of things I don't know but from what I've read there it kind of just felt like

[00:19:47] he was just happy to sit back and let this happen. But absolutely Opie is better off out of that

[00:19:54] situation and they said that they're living their best life and that is what should be happening for

[00:20:00] them. Opie needs to absolutely stay no contact with these people and I wouldn't even be letting

[00:20:05] any family members know your address any of your phone numbers or anything like that as soon as

[00:20:11] someone adds you on social media block them immediately maybe even keep those profiles

[00:20:15] private as you can because they don't sound like a family that's going to let up. They're going to

[00:20:20] find a way to accuse you of ruining things for whatever even if you're out of the picture you

[00:20:26] still did this. When this guy does decide to finally cheat again Opie is going to be the

[00:20:32] one that's going to be blamed for it in some weird twisted logic I imagine. But now I'm going to turn

[00:20:40] this one to you guys. What do you guys make of this situation? How would you deal with it if it was

[00:20:47] you? Would you stay no contact? Would you maybe contact the dad? Let us know your thoughts and

[00:20:52] just a huge thank you for being here today getting involved in the stories your love your support

[00:20:57] your time always means the absolute world to me so thank you so so much and as always I've been

[00:21:02] absolutely loving your pictures of your pet tag and sending me your various hobby pictures etc

[00:21:08] like Caleb did yesterday sending me their Warhammer miniatures and their painting

[00:21:13] absolutely amazing level of detail always love to see this sort of stuff so please keep it coming

[00:21:18] even if you're just going out for a walk and you see something nice I love to see what you're up to

[00:21:22] whilst you're listening in thank you so so much and I will see you in the next one take care and much love

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