My Date Beat Up A Homeless Person And Then Just Ran Away

[00:00:01] [SPEAKER_00] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you're well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit Stories. And if you do love a Reddit Story, why not consider hitting that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now this story comes from a string of numbers from the Relationship Advice subreddit and it says,

[00:00:23] [SPEAKER_00] My 27th female blind date, 30s male, beat up a homeless person who called me a name and ran away. Apologies if this isn't the right subreddit, I'm all over the place. I'm kind of in shock a little right now. I've recently gotten into motorcycles and go for rides every day to practice. I pulled up to a spotlight and someone pulled up beside me. We talked for a minute and I gave him my Snapchat invo because he wanted to go riding sometime.

[00:00:51] [SPEAKER_00] We talked for a few days, scheduled a quick ride for this evening. I'm getting divorced from an abusive man and taking social distancing seriously. So this is all I'm comfortable doing. I didn't tell him about the divorce or my past because it's simply a motorcycle ride, you know? We finish up the ride and stop at a gas station so I can get a drink. We both left our helmets on in lieu of masks. And as we're walking out, a homeless person asked me a question. I didn't hear what he said. I wear earplugs and have a helmet on.

[00:01:20] [SPEAKER_00] So I turned and said, huh? He asked me for change. I said, sorry, but I don't have any. Only my card. He then called me a bitch. I turned away to keep walking because who cares? I'm not bothered. It's not even an issue. We walk a few steps and then my date turns around. He kicks the guy in the chest, punches him in the face three times, spits on him and turns to me and says, let's get out of here and runs over to his bike.

[00:01:49] [SPEAKER_00] What the fuck? I went over to the homeless guy and he's leaned over. I don't know what to do. So I call 911 and request an ambulance for an assault and give them the address. My date at this point has took off. I'm currently inside a Starbucks. I was too shaken up to ride my motorcycle all the way home. I don't know this guy's last name or phone number. All I know is his Snapchat name.

[00:02:13] [SPEAKER_00] So I call the police and talk to them. That's absolutely an assault and this guy should be charged with something. Absolutely disgusting and vile. Calling me a bitch is no reason to potentially permanently injure or kill someone. I'm re-triggered because of the abuse I recently left. I'm a mess. The first commenter says to OP, don't go out with people whose name you don't know. OP says that should be obvious, right? I thought this would be a harmless, simple, casual ride.

[00:02:43] [SPEAKER_00] I've been out of the dating scene for quite some time and that thought never crossed my mind. Sinister says, you're a good person. I love your reaction to this. Every step of the way, really. A homeless guy calls you a bitch. It's not the end of the world. You're an adult, so who cares? Bike a guy you're on a date with beats up the homeless guy. You instinctively go to help the person who has been hurt, despite that person giving you no reason to show them sympathy. You're not impressed, turned on or flattered by the violence.

[00:03:12] [SPEAKER_00] You do the right thing and call the police because violence is never okay and should never be an acceptable response to insults or defending the honor of a lady. You're disgusted by violence and have a strong desire to see justice done. And to top it all off, you practice impeccable social distancing. Jesus, you're a fucking model citizen. I want to live in a place just surrounded by people like you. Imagine how awesome society would be if no one was a piece of shit and everyone was like OP. It'd be utopia.

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_00] R slash relationship advice would be boring as shit, but that would be a small price to pay for living in paradise. So OP did update the post and said, hail, my last post got a lot of attention and was quickly logged. Throughout the night, he called me and sent me about 50 messages on Snapchat. As I said in my last post, I recently left an abusive relationship and am going through a divorce. That being said, I know the importance and having backups upon backups.

[00:04:10] [SPEAKER_00] I didn't block him so I was able to gather evidence. I spoke with the police and handed over what information on my date that I could. I looked up his SC screen name and was able to find his Instagram and other social media. I got his phone number too. The officer told me the homeless person went to hospital after all. They took my report and will be keeping all my information anonymous because of my history, which is a blessing and a huge relief. The story is that it was witnessed by bystanders.

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_00] According to the officer, my date is claiming I got my butt grabbed by the homeless guy. Oh honey, if that were the case, I still would have walked away. Does a butt grab equal that amount of violence? I don't think so. It's not his job to serve justice on my behalf. I have a case number and the city is moving forward with pressing charges. Biker guy is blocked on all platforms. I called my domestic violence advocate and moved my therapy appointment up to today.

[00:05:05] [SPEAKER_00] Fred Biter says, thank you for standing up for that guy. Homeless people are one of those that fall through the cracks. If it weren't for your intervention, this would have been another silent crime. You're a wonderful person. Lopi responds saying thank you. The officer told me, most transient slash homeless people do not report these things. Street credits, trying to fly under the radar, among other things. I myself was homeless up until very recently. If something like this had happened to me, I wouldn't know what to do either.

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_00] A name was taken says, hey, this is a bit unrelated but do me a favor okay. In the future, please don't go on any kind of date with someone unless you have their full name and phone number. And I've verified that's accurate by googling the person slash social media that's not anonymous. And I've shared that info with a trusted friend that knows when and where you're going to date. This whole incident was scary, but the scariest part is that you had virtually no info about the guy when it went down. Lopi says, you got it.

[00:06:04] [SPEAKER_00] I don't think I'd be dating anyone for a long time either. I didn't consider this to be a date initially. It was barely even a friendly hangout. It was simply a motorcycle ride. We met at a target and rode around for an hour. My internal scope slash perception of things is definitely off. I'm going to stick to solo riding or maybe with other women riders. The commuter says, does a butt grab equals that amount of violence? The commuter says, yes. Grabbing someone's ass is sexual assault.

[00:06:32] [SPEAKER_00] If you sexually assault random people, you deserve what's coming to you. Lopi replies saying, why is it up to him, the date, to decide what the homeless person deserves? Shouldn't I, the victim, be the one who decides? Edit to add, is there some kind of glitch in the simulation? Or do you believe women truly incapable of making decisions on their own? If I wanted his ass kicked because he grabbed my ass, I would do it myself. Or ask my date to kick his ass for me. Same goes for calling me a bitch.

[00:07:02] [SPEAKER_00] It's not his job or role to unilaterally decide how and to what degree justice would be served. But now I'm going to turn this one straight to you guys. What do you guys make of this situation? How would you deal with it if it was you? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Let's move on to another story. Now before we do get into this next story, I do want to give you a warning. It does contain domestic violence. So if you do want to skip the story, please feel free to do so.

[00:07:31] [SPEAKER_00] Timestamps are always down in the description and along the timeline below. Thank you. This one is from a throwaway account titled, We've been married for a few years and have a baby. We had relationship issues after the baby, but I thought we had resolved them. And he promised he'd be better and all that. He did get better.

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_00] He did his share around the house. The house chores aren't a big issue because he just does what needs to be done without complaint or comment. But something at the back of my head felt off. I never really explored the nagging feeling, but now I realize that he never showed me any extra care. In fact, he gets upset or easily frustrated with me if I cause any extra inconvenience. Not sure how I didn't notice until now. So two days ago, I think I got sick.

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_00] I was feeling that gross thick skin feeling and vertigo, lightheaded, I don't know. And by the time I was shivering and freezing, I was able to function so I didn't think much of it. Complained to my husband about it. And then we went to sleep. Yesterday, I woke up feeling like my bones were lead. I don't know how I functioned yesterday, but it felt like autopilot. My boss messaged me with some tasks, so I did them on my phone before my baby woke up. Rolled out of bed and somehow took my sister to school.

[00:08:57] [SPEAKER_00] Came back and worked some more. Usually, I have the energy to flip between being a mom and working, but yesterday, I just laid on the floor to work while my one-year-old watched some Miss Rachel. Then I had to pick up my sister from school. Come home to make dinner, and by the time my husband came home, I felt dead on my feet. Anytime I moved, it felt like I was lagging and my body couldn't keep up. I told my husband this a few times. We ate, I put away the leftovers, and put the baby to sleep while my husband went to his office to do some quick work.

[00:09:28] [SPEAKER_00] After this, I don't really remember because my brain was foggy. I found myself in his office. We exchanged a few words, but I don't remember what. And the next thing I knew, I woke up alone in his office on the floor. I felt so heavy and out of it. It took so much effort to get up, but when I got out, all the lights were off, the kitchen was not touched, and he was in bed. I just stood in the kitchen and realized he doesn't care. I already knew he wasn't going to clean the kitchen tomorrow, and that he didn't care I felt off.

[00:09:57] [SPEAKER_00] I had a busy day planned, and I didn't have time to wash all the dishes the next day. So, I loaded the dishwasher, and then went to bed. I laid down, and five minutes later, my husband, very angrily, told me to turn off the lights in the kitchen. At this point, I had no energy to deal with him, so I ignored him and fell asleep. The next morning, today, I woke up covered in sweat, but that gross feeling was gone. That's when I realized that I was sick. My husband was upset with me.

[00:10:25] [SPEAKER_00] He wouldn't talk or look at me and was stomping around. I tried to ask him about yesterday, but he just grumbled and said something about me confusing him. Everything from yesterday caught up, but I just can't see him the same. I realized that he has never taken care of me, or done anything that was inconvenient for him. I've been sick before, and every time it's the same thing. He gets upset at me somehow. After I had a baby, he was upset that nothing was kept up around the house,

[00:10:52] [SPEAKER_00] yet got angry with me when I fainted from overexertion at two weeks postpartum. I remembered him yelling at me that I did this to myself, and it's my fault for not taking care of myself. Even though just two days before, he was telling me that he was angry with me for not keeping up with laundry, and that I needed to clean the kitchen because it was starting to smell, and he didn't want to cook anymore. Don't even get me started on how he never woke up at night. All these memories hit me, and I'm just disgusted by him. How did I not see this?

[00:11:21] [SPEAKER_00] What do I even do? I'm going to stop here before the post gets too long. Edit, he just texts me saying he's beat and could barely brush his teeth this morning. I don't even know what to respond. I can't believe I took care of this man every time he got sick and after two surgeries. Now, I don't think I really need to say what most people are going to say in this situation, do I? Because it's bloody obvious. He just left you on the floor, not knowing what happened to you, completely passed out.

[00:11:50] [SPEAKER_00] So, I'm guessing walked around you or walked over you or whatever, turned the lights off and went to bed thinking she can deal with it herself. And I imagine this situation is, well, it sounds like it anyway from what Opie's been saying, is the straw that broke the camel's back. It's something that's been happening for a very long time. I mean, he did it when he was, what, two weeks after giving birth? It's one of those situations that we see time and time again in these subreddits where it's just, the fog is starting to lift from around you and you've simply had enough.

[00:12:18] [SPEAKER_00] But, I do think Opie needs to be careful and look after themselves at the same time, especially with this kind of behavior. It's really worrying, right? Desperate to Not Dream says, You didn't leave the room. He did. That means at some point, you were laying on the floor and he walked out and left you there and just went to bed. Ars of Valhalla says, great name by the way, and turned off the lights on her too. So, he knew she was laying there. Didn't freak out about any of it, just turned the lights off and went to bed.

[00:12:46] [SPEAKER_00] Then got mad at her for leaving a light on. Like this man actively hates her. Elizabeth Reeves says, She could have fucking died there. Worldly Thing says, Opie needs to see a doctor. Opie, you're kind of putting your husband's feelings and convenience and needs before your own and your child. What if you fell with your child and he wasn't there? You need your health. Don't wait for him anymore. Scroll Girl says, Read your post. Reread it again. Print a copy and hang it on the wall if you need to.

[00:13:17] [SPEAKER_00] This man does not care about you. And you know that. At least go stay with a family or friend for a few days to get help with the baby while you recover and get your head together. Refrigerator Fun says, Wait. You passed out in front of him and he just left you laying on the floor. I'm usually a work on things advice giver but not here. Get a lawyer and figure out how to get out of there. Opie says,

[00:13:54] [SPEAKER_00] Refrigerator Fun replies saying, Yeah, none of what you described is okay. And I wouldn't want a child around someone with those beliefs and behaviors. So, It was a month later that Opie did update the post and says, Hi, So, I'm still alive. I've had a surprising amount of people message me a week or two ago. And it's very kind of you people to care. I'll go right into what happened. I went to the hospital that day. Since a shocking percentage of people suspected he could have messed with something but no.

[00:14:23] [SPEAKER_00] The doctor said nothing came up. But he did say I had high blood pressure and recommended me to a cardiologist. I still have a month left before the appointment. When my husband got home from work, he was acting like everything was normal. I wanted to see if he would inquire at all about my faint the night prior but nothing. So after the baby was settled for the night, I asked him why I woke up alone in his office. He got instantly angry with me and seemed annoyed I even brought it up.

[00:14:49] [SPEAKER_00] He said that I was acting confusing and what was he supposed to do? I should have told him what I wanted him to do. I told him about my visit to the hospital. And he said that going to the hospital is a little much. I told him the doctor said I am showing signs of heart issues, likely caused by stress. He blew up on me, yelling that I'm causing my own early grave and that it's my fault for not taking care of myself. With that, he closed himself in the room, leaving me to clean up after dinner alone again.

[00:15:18] [SPEAKER_00] Except I decided that I wouldn't so I went on the couch and watched the movie. He came out suddenly friendly and flirty. He tried to lay with me and ask what I was doing. He kept trying to act cute when I wasn't showing much response to it. He got angry and stormed off, locking me out of the bedroom. The next morning, I woke up to him slamming around the kitchen and cussing about how I couldn't even properly clean the kitchen. I just went to the bedroom and went back to sleep.

[00:15:45] [SPEAKER_00] If you can call it that because he kept doing things to keep me awake. He complained later that day about how he was so hungry because I didn't make him breakfast or lunch. I gave myself a break day. I didn't work, didn't focus on the house. I was just a mum and spent time with our baby. I went to the park, to the library, to my in-laws. I tried to talk to her about the heart thing. And she responded with, Poor husband's name. He's probably going to stress about this. That's when I realized I couldn't do this anymore.

[00:16:15] [SPEAKER_00] I got pizza for dinner and got home right after my husband. He was not happy. And it was different this time. I tried to ignore his obvious tension. He cleaned the kitchen very loudly and was muttering under his breath. I washed up our daughter and put her to bed, trying not to feel anxious. When I came out, he started talking very aggressively about how I've been letting myself get lazy. And he won't take my lack of effort. Our relationship is a two-way street, he said.

[00:16:41] [SPEAKER_00] I started yelling back about how I cook, clean, manage his child and work at the same time. So how is it that I'm the one that's lazy when he keeps expecting me to do more things too? Things escalated and he started throwing dishes at me. When he ran out of things to throw, he strangled me. Then he left the house and I called the police. My baby was woken up. The neighbors were there because they heard yelling and glass breaking. It was chaos. When he came back, he tried to say I did everything.

[00:17:09] [SPEAKER_00] Even the bruises around my neck were self-inflicted apparently. I'm still trying to process everything. It all happened so fast. Sometimes I wonder, what would have happened if I just sucked it up and didn't rebel? Would our relationship be fine? I have my first therapy session scheduled for next Tuesday, so I guess I'll talk about it then. My husband is at his mom's now. I'm at my grandmother's for now and have almost all of my stuff out of our apartment. We have a temporary restraining order.

[00:17:37] [SPEAKER_00] Official hearing is tomorrow morning. I'm scared if I'm honest. I haven't seen him since that night. My daughter keeps asking me where dad is and I don't know what to tell her. There's my update. I feel so numb to it all. I can probably type much more that happened but it already feels so long. Plus, I don't want to cry again. Edits, I re-read this all and I sound like a big whiny baby. Oh my goodness, I'm sorry. I promise I don't sound like this in person. I also wanted to add a thought.

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_00] I don't know if I would have called the police and all if I hadn't posted before. I honestly don't know. This is the most scariest thing he's done to me. But he's done plenty of other things before. When I originally posted, it was more of a vent post. All your caring, kind thoughts moved me. It gave me the little push I needed. I only have my little sister and my grandmother. I can't tell my grandmother any of these details because she's too frail and sensitive. My dad was an alcoholic and died while under the influence. My mom left us after that for a guy in Russia.

[00:18:35] [SPEAKER_00] I don't know how she's doing but she used to treat us very poorly so I don't really care. Point is, thank you. The responses here are too kind and I don't even know what to say. Pink Hart Tower says, Hey, I normally don't actually comment on these things too much. But as a literal therapist, I'm begging you to go through with the official court hearing tomorrow and leave this man. I've counseled countless women who convinced themselves that it wasn't that bad for one reason or another. It was that bad.

[00:19:04] [SPEAKER_00] That man could have killed you and had no problem throwing various things at you intending to cause harm. I know this is difficult and you likely feel terrified at the idea of what comes next. But whatever comes next without him is infinitely better than whatever comes next if you stay with him. I can nearly guarantee that. Both and your child deserve better. Good luck. Calm Chameleon says, As a psychologist, I'm thirding this.

[00:19:30] [SPEAKER_00] This man is extremely dangerous and he already tried to kill you once. Please don't go anywhere near him to give him the opportunity to try again. You are not a whiner or complainer. You weren't verbalizing your trauma and completely justified. It's also completely normal to feel numb and disassociate after such a trauma. Lean on your family and any other positive supports. Stick with therapy and request to file charges against this guy. Reach out to a local domestic violence support agency and request an advocate.

[00:20:00] [SPEAKER_00] I wish you all the best. Professional Kiwi says, I'm not a psychologist, but I've survived an abusive relationship. Please listen to them OP. Imagine someone were treating your child like this or a close friend. This is not okay. It's scary. But trust me, it gets better. I walked out with what I could carry in a paper grocery bag and only saw him again in court. My life is awesome and I'm so grateful for the second chance. And one more comment from Puzzle Headed Pie who says, I hope you see this.

[00:20:28] [SPEAKER_00] My sister was in the same situation three years ago. The death anniversary is in a few weeks. Please leave. They don't change. Oh, gee, bloody whiz. That is an absolutely heartbreaking one. And I really do hope that OP listens to those comments and acts accordingly because, and just to say to OP, you are not a whiny baby. You were strangled by someone, had things thrown at you from someone who was supposed to love you. You're a survivor of domestic violence. Who got herself out of that situation with a daughter. Safety.

[00:20:59] [SPEAKER_00] That's not being a whiny baby. It's incredibly strong to actually take that first step. And I really hope that you do continue down that path and get away from that person. The way OP was describing his behavior from, you know, sweet and flirty to then instantly, you know, getting up and slamming the doors and stuff. It's absolutely terrifying behavior. And what the fuck was mother-in-law's response in this poor husband when you mentioned potential heart problems from the stress that that motherfucker's causing?

[00:21:27] [SPEAKER_00] But once again, I really hope that OP does continues to stay out of that situation because absolutely terrifying. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Just a huge thank you for being here today. Getting involved in the stories, your love, your support, your time. It always means the world to me. So thank you so, so much. And hopefully I'll see you in the next one. Take care and much love.