My Dad Stole My Identity And Opened Credit Cards In My Name r/Relationships

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[00:00:46] [SPEAKER_01]: Hey, what's up, Gengai?

[00:00:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I do hope your world, my name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories

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[00:01:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Much love guys.

[00:01:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Now today's first story comes from where are my pants?

[00:01:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Tiled Dad stole my identity and opened three credit cards in my name.

[00:01:10] [SPEAKER_01]: He told me since I'm young, I can do without for a few years.

[00:01:14] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm trying to buy a house and I'm freaking out.

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_01]: I found my dad used my information to open three credit cards over the last year.

[00:01:23] [SPEAKER_01]: But I went to get a pre-approval from mortgage.

[00:01:26] [SPEAKER_01]: I was told by the lender that they wouldn't be able to give me a home loan

[00:01:29] [SPEAKER_01]: because of the defaulted credit card.

[00:01:31] [SPEAKER_01]: They also said I probably wouldn't be able to get a loan from any lender

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_01]: because of it and gave me a sheet of paper explaining what I'd need to do in order to fix it.

[00:01:40] [SPEAKER_01]: And I tried to speat the cards, one of which is already in collections.

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_01]: The dispute has got closed out as the debts were verified.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I told my divorce parents about it and their answers were pretty wildly different.

[00:01:53] [SPEAKER_01]: By Dad said that these things happen and I should be more careful in the future with my social security number.

[00:01:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Things I've always been careful.

[00:02:01] [SPEAKER_01]: That made me pretty mad.

[00:02:03] [SPEAKER_01]: My mum says she thinks my dad might have something to do with it,

[00:02:07] [SPEAKER_01]: since him opening credit cards in her name had a part to play in their divorce.

[00:02:12] [SPEAKER_01]: She told me he ran up about $50,000 in credit card debt on secret credit cards.

[00:02:18] [SPEAKER_01]: A few days ago I ended up casually telling my dad,

[00:02:21] [SPEAKER_01]: and going to have to file a police report for the credit cards.

[00:02:23] [SPEAKER_01]: He told me I probably shouldn't do that because $15,000 isn't that much in the grand scheme of things.

[00:02:31] [SPEAKER_01]: When I told him it was keeping me from buying a house.

[00:02:33] [SPEAKER_01]: He said I could just wait a few years until they fell off with my credit score.

[00:02:38] [SPEAKER_01]: He said it would only take another four and a half years.

[00:02:41] [SPEAKER_01]: When I told him I obviously couldn't wait that long,

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_01]: so I have to file a police report. He straight up told me not to.

[00:02:49] [SPEAKER_01]: And I had to just be more careful in the future.

[00:02:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Once I told him I already got the paperwork together from the credit agencies,

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_01]: he told me he had opened the cards to pay for living expenses over the last year.

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_01]: He said his works slowed down a little bit,

[00:03:02] [SPEAKER_01]: but he'd do what he could to help pay it off.

[00:03:04] [SPEAKER_01]: He said it would ruin his life if he went to jail.

[00:03:07] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm leaning towards going to the police anyway,

[00:03:10] [SPEAKER_01]: but I didn't write that minute.

[00:03:12] [SPEAKER_01]: I've everything in front of me today to make that report.

[00:03:15] [SPEAKER_01]: I guess I should have made sure,

[00:03:16] [SPEAKER_01]: then I'll go over to the police and the right things I do here.

[00:03:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Especially if I'm wanting to buy a house this year.

[00:03:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Now obviously, I'm sure the comments in everyone else is going to tell you that you need to report this ASAP,

[00:03:28] [SPEAKER_01]: because you know he said to you,

[00:03:30] [SPEAKER_01]: he said it would ruin his life if he went to jail,

[00:03:33] [SPEAKER_01]: whereas he's ruining your life right now.

[00:03:36] [SPEAKER_01]: He's doing that to his child right now.

[00:03:39] [SPEAKER_01]: And as a history of doing it with his wife clearly,

[00:03:43] [SPEAKER_01]: in famous ad says, report him.

[00:03:45] [SPEAKER_01]: The same thing happened to me after my Paris de Somme man.

[00:03:48] [SPEAKER_01]: I was in undergrad.

[00:03:50] [SPEAKER_01]: I learned a lot about personal finance and got it sorted out

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and paid off the credit card bills.

[00:03:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Then I find my dad trying to do it again.

[00:03:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Hold my family to stay away from me and gathered evidence

[00:04:00] [SPEAKER_01]: that I would take them to court for the debit in identity theft.

[00:04:04] [SPEAKER_01]: The fact that your dad is so non-shallonth his give me PTSD.

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Sign up for credit checking and slash or credit monitoring service

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_01]: to prevent any further activity and definitely follow the police report.

[00:04:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Curious is the George says,

[00:04:18] [SPEAKER_01]: My father didn't report my grandfather when he did the exact same thing.

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Even if the debt gets paid, that's much longer impact than five years.

[00:04:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Also, if you don't report, you will do it again.

[00:04:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Better hurt but report him for fraud now.

[00:04:33] [SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't love you enough to not fuck you over.

[00:04:35] [SPEAKER_01]: He's just looking to see if he can get away with it.

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Rude veterinarian says,

[00:04:39] [SPEAKER_01]: it's a lot more than just buying your house.

[00:04:42] [SPEAKER_01]: These days landlords want 700 plus credit scores just to rent.

[00:04:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Many jobs require decent credit scores.

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_01]: I had to have a credit check recently for a practical placement

[00:04:51] [SPEAKER_01]: because I'm updating my nursing degree for a medical legal position.

[00:04:55] [SPEAKER_01]: What if you need a car or to finance major car repairs?

[00:04:59] [SPEAKER_01]: For all intents and purposes, your dad has sabotaged your life.

[00:05:03] [SPEAKER_01]: File the police report and one more comment from altruistic lock

[00:05:07] [SPEAKER_01]: who says, then your father in for identity theft.

[00:05:10] [SPEAKER_01]: This is absolutely unforgivable.

[00:05:12] [SPEAKER_01]: This is a felony, so three counts at least of identity theft.

[00:05:16] [SPEAKER_01]: And yes, it is that serious.

[00:05:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Identity theft is a form of murder.

[00:05:21] [SPEAKER_01]: The credit report will be scarred for life.

[00:05:23] [SPEAKER_01]: If you barred you from getting a house for at least 10,

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_01]: if not 15 years at least, some banks will never borrow to you.

[00:05:30] [SPEAKER_01]: You will always have at least two times higher interest rates.

[00:05:33] [SPEAKER_01]: You need to get this wiped off your credit report.

[00:05:36] [SPEAKER_01]: There's BS about you can do without it for a few years as an outright lie.

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_01]: This will cost you jobs, promotions, and it's security rates job.

[00:05:43] [SPEAKER_01]: No, this is very serious.

[00:05:45] [SPEAKER_01]: I would call the FBI.

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Affordable cars, what else is this man doing for money that is illegal?

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Get a lawyer.

[00:05:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Relation or not, this is highly illegal.

[00:05:55] [SPEAKER_01]: You want to home.

[00:05:56] [SPEAKER_01]: If you want to home, do it today.

[00:05:58] [SPEAKER_01]: What your father did not tell you is even after seven years.

[00:06:01] [SPEAKER_01]: A large mortgage company will still look at you.

[00:06:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Your RSS number is a fraudster.

[00:06:07] [SPEAKER_01]: It problems in his life, so you decided to screw his kid for decades.

[00:06:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I wish you luck.

[00:06:12] [SPEAKER_01]: This will get ugly.

[00:06:14] [SPEAKER_01]: You may want to tell your boss at work.

[00:06:15] [SPEAKER_01]: You're a victim of fraud.

[00:06:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Credit theft.

[00:06:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Many people who's jobs in today's world with this on their credit report.

[00:06:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Even though it is not your fault.

[00:06:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Your father sounds like he's going to let them all go to collections also.

[00:06:27] [SPEAKER_01]: And absolutely, I agree with his comments, especially with the non-sharp attitude towards it

[00:06:32] [SPEAKER_01]: or like he said, it would only take four and a half years

[00:06:35] [SPEAKER_01]: in.

[00:06:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Also says stuff like, it do what he can to help pay it off.

[00:06:40] [SPEAKER_01]: It just says it all to me about his attitude, especially with his past history of this

[00:06:44] [SPEAKER_01]: at the same time.

[00:06:46] [SPEAKER_01]: I hope he comes back in with their first update and says I spent about half of the day reading

[00:06:50] [SPEAKER_01]: everyone's comments and it pretty much solidified what I was going to do.

[00:06:54] [SPEAKER_01]: The process itself was pretty easy.

[00:06:56] [SPEAKER_01]: I went to the police department and the person at the front desk had me worried

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_01]: about 10 minutes before an officer came out.

[00:07:01] [SPEAKER_01]: We talked for about 15 minutes and he made copies of all the paperwork I gave him.

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_01]: He told me the case would be assigned to a detective on Tuesday, gave me a pamphlet.

[00:07:11] [SPEAKER_01]: They have about how to contact the credit agencies.

[00:07:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Was given a report number and was told I could use that now to start disputing the accounts.

[00:07:19] [SPEAKER_01]: The detective is going to follow up with me in the next couple of weeks.

[00:07:23] [SPEAKER_01]: I asked what would end up happening to my dad and the officer said it looked pretty clear

[00:07:26] [SPEAKER_01]: cut to him but the charging decision is 100% with the state attorney's office.

[00:07:31] [SPEAKER_01]: He said if they decide to pursue charges, you'd like to get a warrant put out for his arrest.

[00:07:36] [SPEAKER_01]: He also said typically if this is his first felony.

[00:07:39] [SPEAKER_01]: He's probably going to get some sort of free trial diversion with court supervision or probation.

[00:07:44] [SPEAKER_01]: He probably won't go to jail for years but he gets picked up on a warrant.

[00:07:47] [SPEAKER_01]: He's going to spend at least a little bit of time behind bars.

[00:07:51] [SPEAKER_01]: I've decided I'm okay with that because it's obvious to me he did this purposely.

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_01]: He's never been arrested before so hopefully this is a wake-up call for him.

[00:07:58] [SPEAKER_01]: At the same time he completely did this to himself.

[00:08:02] [SPEAKER_01]: I'll update whenever I learn more.

[00:08:05] [SPEAKER_01]: So there was a lot of congratulations in the comments on that update,

[00:08:09] [SPEAKER_01]: you know just saying well done for people making that step saying they know it's difficult

[00:08:12] [SPEAKER_01]: but something that needed to be done.

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_01]: OPP came in with another update and says there's been some good,

[00:08:19] [SPEAKER_01]: a little bad and a little real bad progress the past few days.

[00:08:23] [SPEAKER_01]: The good, I use my report number and disputed every account.

[00:08:26] [SPEAKER_01]: When I checked my credit last which everyone should be doing regularly,

[00:08:31] [SPEAKER_01]: one of the lowest balance was already off of my account.

[00:08:33] [SPEAKER_01]: The other cards in the collection account are still showing.

[00:08:36] [SPEAKER_01]: They have hoped they'd be falling off in the next few weeks.

[00:08:39] [SPEAKER_01]: They also received a call from someone at the Prosecutor's Office

[00:08:42] [SPEAKER_01]: where a couple of extra questions for me.

[00:08:45] [SPEAKER_01]: And I asked if I'd be willing to testify if they charged him.

[00:08:48] [SPEAKER_01]: I said yes and they said they would be making a decision on their charges before the end of the month.

[00:08:53] [SPEAKER_01]: The bad? Obviously someone talked to my dad about this because the last time he talked,

[00:08:58] [SPEAKER_01]: he scolded me for going to the police and hasn't talked to me since.

[00:09:02] [SPEAKER_01]: When my brother was also pretty mad at me about it and hasn't talked me in over a week.

[00:09:07] [SPEAKER_01]: The rest of my siblings and my mom understood where I was coming from.

[00:09:10] [SPEAKER_01]: The real bad? When my other brothers,

[00:09:13] [SPEAKER_01]: not the one who was pissed found two open credit cards on his credit which weren't his.

[00:09:19] [SPEAKER_01]: He checked his credit score for the first time in a couple of years

[00:09:21] [SPEAKER_01]: and he said it was down about 150 points from where it used to be.

[00:09:26] [SPEAKER_01]: He's now in the process of dealing with that.

[00:09:28] [SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't have any positive proof yet, but the thing is appointing in that direction.

[00:09:35] [SPEAKER_01]: It still blows my mind that that could do this to his own children.

[00:09:39] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm moving forward though.

[00:09:40] [SPEAKER_01]: I still hope to be able to purchase a house before the end of the year.

[00:09:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Hope you added a comment below that one saying also,

[00:09:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I think all of my other siblings, there are six of us are checking their credit too.

[00:09:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Probably for the best.

[00:09:54] [SPEAKER_01]: The second top comment on this one from Doctor says,

[00:09:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not a psycho analyst but something tells me here as an addiction of one kind or another.

[00:10:02] [SPEAKER_01]: I've seen this baby in others.

[00:10:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Mainly friends, family members or significant others

[00:10:07] [SPEAKER_01]: and there is always a root cause related to addiction,

[00:10:10] [SPEAKER_01]: whether it's gambling, drugs, alcohol or all of the above.

[00:10:13] [SPEAKER_01]: If you, your siblings or your mom have a relationship with your dad in the future

[00:10:18] [SPEAKER_01]: is absolutely needs to be addressed before moving forward.

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm glad you sorted the situation out for yourself and I'm certain it wasn't easy to do so.

[00:10:26] [SPEAKER_01]: You also paved the way if your family members managed to manage the effects of this on there

[00:10:31] [SPEAKER_01]: as well as your dad to correct his ways.

[00:10:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Whether or not he has deeper issues or this was just a really shitty thing he did.

[00:10:39] [SPEAKER_01]: An OP came in with what they titled their final update.

[00:10:43] [SPEAKER_01]: This is going to be my final update as it seems this has gone viral

[00:10:46] [SPEAKER_01]: and hit a few different big websites.

[00:10:49] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm happy to say my credit has completely returned to normal.

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_01]: All of the disputed accounts are now gone.

[00:10:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Obviously I'm excited about this since he gives me a solid financial future.

[00:11:01] [SPEAKER_01]: I also received a letter from the prosecutor's office two weeks ago

[00:11:04] [SPEAKER_01]: and they said they're going forward with a charge of what is basically identity theft.

[00:11:09] [SPEAKER_01]: I spoke with an assistant prosecutor and explained that they'd be putting a warrant shortly

[00:11:14] [SPEAKER_01]: but that has a first time offender.

[00:11:16] [SPEAKER_01]: They probably offer a Mr. Meena charge in a plea.

[00:11:19] [SPEAKER_01]: My dad was arrested last Friday after a traffic stop.

[00:11:22] [SPEAKER_01]: He got out of jail the next day,

[00:11:24] [SPEAKER_01]: that's a new court date in late August according to the Public Records website.

[00:11:29] [SPEAKER_01]: He called me and told me I'm dead to him and to never contact him again.

[00:11:33] [SPEAKER_01]: I'd rather you found credit cards opened in his name as made a police report as well

[00:11:37] [SPEAKER_01]: but apparently the addresses are different on the accounts.

[00:11:40] [SPEAKER_01]: It was told it was unlikely he would be prosecuted but he's working on getting them off of his credit.

[00:11:47] [SPEAKER_01]: OP, I don't a comment below that and said,

[00:11:49] [SPEAKER_01]: just wanted to give everyone who commented in my other poster shoutout

[00:11:53] [SPEAKER_01]: you've all given me the courage to do this.

[00:11:56] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to be deleting this throw away because I really hope to put all of this behind me

[00:12:00] [SPEAKER_01]: between the news articles and having to go no contact with my dad.

[00:12:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Don't let things like this sneak up on you.

[00:12:06] [SPEAKER_01]: It breaks my heart to do this to my dad but he did this to himself.

[00:12:12] [SPEAKER_01]: OP, you did nothing to him.

[00:12:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Like you said, he did all of this himself.

[00:12:17] [SPEAKER_01]: He's the one who stole your identity open credit cards in your name.

[00:12:21] [SPEAKER_01]: His child, whether it be his like some other comment said addiction or not,

[00:12:26] [SPEAKER_01]: it's not an excuse for what he did to you.

[00:12:28] [SPEAKER_01]: So the him to get in contact with you and say,

[00:12:30] [SPEAKER_01]: you're dead to him.

[00:12:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Which I know is going to be difficult for you because you don't lose feelings for people instantly like that.

[00:12:39] [SPEAKER_01]: But this is someone that was willing to go out and damage you like that.

[00:12:44] [SPEAKER_01]: So in the end screw them and I really wish you the best future and your siblings too.

[00:12:49] [SPEAKER_01]: I hope the brother who was angry with you comes around to seeing the correct way about things

[00:12:55] [SPEAKER_01]: because I think not only have you protected yourself here,

[00:12:59] [SPEAKER_01]: you've protected your other siblings at the same time.

[00:13:02] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm making that step to report him.

[00:13:04] [SPEAKER_01]: He's done this to his wife, he's done it to you, he's going to continue to do it to other people as well.

[00:13:09] [SPEAKER_01]: So fair play to OP.

[00:13:11] [SPEAKER_01]: But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys, what do you guys make of this situation?

[00:13:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below and let's move on to another story.

[00:13:24] [SPEAKER_00]: It's just kind of a kindness that's guys who are currently in hand-in-hand.

[00:13:28] [SPEAKER_00]: They all are still a good work life balance.

[00:13:31] [SPEAKER_00]: And the best future and wellness and wellness are available and are ready for the ultimate motivation.

[00:13:38] [SPEAKER_00]: As a fourth of the month of the 5th of Firmand Fitness in Germany,

[00:13:41] [SPEAKER_00]: the fourth part of the work is going to be done.

[00:13:44] [SPEAKER_00]: With an 8.500 partners, the 15 different sports partners,

[00:13:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Firmand Fitness and Yoga Studio, Swimbehran and Bolderhine are available for a bit of wellness temple.

[00:13:53] [SPEAKER_00]: beat the Tanzafet Jede Netwas.

[00:13:55] [SPEAKER_00]: For more information, visit Tanzafet.de

[00:13:58] [SPEAKER_00]: and fill in with the things that are worth the time.

[00:14:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Anna, A, who is from another country.

[00:14:30] [SPEAKER_01]: A sister B is dying of cancer.

[00:14:33] [SPEAKER_01]: It is heartbreaking.

[00:14:34] [SPEAKER_01]: She is a young mother and wife.

[00:14:37] [SPEAKER_01]: The diagnosis was about four years ago.

[00:14:39] [SPEAKER_01]: When she was first diagnosed, she was given one to two years.

[00:14:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Since we're in a different country as she, B, remained in a home country with her family

[00:14:48] [SPEAKER_01]: after a sister A immigrated.

[00:14:50] [SPEAKER_01]: We saved up some money and travelled to say goodbye to her.

[00:14:53] [SPEAKER_01]: It was about the one and a half year mark when we went to say goodbye.

[00:14:57] [SPEAKER_01]: And we had gotten engaged soon beforehand.

[00:15:00] [SPEAKER_01]: But we also went over to visit some of the family who asked how long they needed to

[00:15:04] [SPEAKER_01]: save to come across for our wedding.

[00:15:06] [SPEAKER_01]: As our dollar is much stronger than theirs.

[00:15:09] [SPEAKER_01]: They said two years, so that was agreed.

[00:15:12] [SPEAKER_01]: We spent a month with her, laughing, lamenting, spending it as much quality time as possible

[00:15:17] [SPEAKER_01]: with her.

[00:15:18] [SPEAKER_01]: By the end of the trip though, and with the chemo, she was exhausted.

[00:15:22] [SPEAKER_01]: We said a heart-breaking goodbye is assuming to never see her again.

[00:15:27] [SPEAKER_01]: And then she made a miraculous recovery, with a less than 1% chance of happening, which

[00:15:33] [SPEAKER_01]: was awesome.

[00:15:34] [SPEAKER_01]: We along with our other family members, they also immigrated, such as a father and brother.

[00:15:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Decided to put money together and support her to move over here to spend the rest of her life

[00:15:44] [SPEAKER_01]: with us.

[00:15:45] [SPEAKER_01]: That was about a year ago.

[00:15:46] [SPEAKER_01]: Now, my partner and I get married in two weeks.

[00:15:49] [SPEAKER_01]: All of her family are coming to visit.

[00:15:51] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a big joyous occasion with lots of travel.

[00:15:54] [SPEAKER_01]: We fought out thousands to help her family get here and they're all staying for a month

[00:15:59] [SPEAKER_01]: or so to celebrate our wedding and spend time with us.

[00:16:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Two weeks ago, we got a bad diagnosis.

[00:16:06] [SPEAKER_01]: They found lumps, and they said she has about a year left to live.

[00:16:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Chief obvious reasons didn't handle this well, lashed out at us in our wedding telling us

[00:16:16] [SPEAKER_01]: not to talk about it around her.

[00:16:18] [SPEAKER_01]: My partner has always kind of lived in her older sister's shadow, so she was really

[00:16:23] [SPEAKER_01]: excited to be celebrated and made a fuss of for once.

[00:16:26] [SPEAKER_01]: But be as told everyone about a diagnosis and has started saying,

[00:16:30] [SPEAKER_01]: this is the last time I will see most of you.

[00:16:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Now the focus is completely off my partner and I'm not wedding and it's absolutely

[00:16:37] [SPEAKER_01]: about me.

[00:16:39] [SPEAKER_01]: I feel heartless and heartbroken but I'm frustrated by this.

[00:16:43] [SPEAKER_01]: She's been going out of her way to make sure that people who are coming across, we have

[00:16:47] [SPEAKER_01]: a thousand for flight.

[00:16:48] [SPEAKER_01]: But a lot of that matters that much, our spending is much time with her as possible

[00:16:52] [SPEAKER_01]: as this is the last time she will see them.

[00:16:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Now this period of joy and celebration has an undeniable black cloud hung over it and

[00:17:00] [SPEAKER_01]: people very obviously have stopped making my partner feel special.

[00:17:04] [SPEAKER_01]: On top of this, be as maintained as a stance that we will not talk about our wedding around

[00:17:08] [SPEAKER_01]: her.

[00:17:09] [SPEAKER_01]: But the big issue is that be got married during COVID.

[00:17:13] [SPEAKER_01]: So never got a father slashed all to dance.

[00:17:16] [SPEAKER_01]: She wants to have one at our wedding after my partner has a father and daughter dance.

[00:17:21] [SPEAKER_01]: With her own song which to be honest, saddest fuck.

[00:17:25] [SPEAKER_01]: I have said no, because my partner wanted to say no but felt too guilty so I had to

[00:17:30] [SPEAKER_01]: be the bad guy.

[00:17:32] [SPEAKER_01]: I told my partner that if we're not to talk about our wedding around her sister then

[00:17:36] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't want her sister talking about her dying around us.

[00:17:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Now I'm being called an asshole.

[00:17:41] [SPEAKER_01]: I do absolutely feel like one but I also feel like this is grossly unfair to ask us

[00:17:46] [SPEAKER_01]: to brush our wedding under the carpet because of this.

[00:17:49] [SPEAKER_01]: I am I, yeah so at it.

[00:17:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Sorry I just woke up more work through the many comments as fast as I can.

[00:17:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I really appreciate all the views and discussions.

[00:17:59] [SPEAKER_01]: It's precisely why I came here.

[00:18:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Genuinely, thank you.

[00:18:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Consistence of reward says in fact saturate the before with her so it can't be a topic

[00:18:09] [SPEAKER_01]: during the wedding.

[00:18:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Rahu's all dinner?

[00:18:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I just want to say how happy I am that my sister can be here and as a gesture

[00:18:15] [SPEAKER_01]: do you have this dance right after we leave?

[00:18:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Urban land mindset is if the sister doesn't want to hear about the wedding then she can't make

[00:18:24] [SPEAKER_01]: any plans regarding the wedding.

[00:18:26] [SPEAKER_01]: If she is requesting a father daughter dance and she can have it after the celebrations are done

[00:18:30] [SPEAKER_01]: but everyone is out on the dance or dancing.

[00:18:33] [SPEAKER_01]: That way the focus will still on you as a couple and she still gets her wish.

[00:18:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Cancer sucks and people who dying from it are understandably upset.

[00:18:42] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm sorry that it spilled out on you but getting mad at her will only reflect poorly on you.

[00:18:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Miseen von Muffling says if true and she was given a year to live,

[00:18:53] [SPEAKER_01]: she could give her sister that one fucking day and stay quiet.

[00:18:57] [SPEAKER_01]: But no she makes it about herself.

[00:18:59] [SPEAKER_01]: A missed dance, her missed whatever and ruins the day for you guys that way assuming

[00:19:03] [SPEAKER_01]: she's telling the truth. I get weird vibes.

[00:19:06] [SPEAKER_01]: If I were you, I'd go to the courthouse slash a lot without telling anyone and cancel the celebration

[00:19:11] [SPEAKER_01]: and have one way later. OPP says we considered this.

[00:19:16] [SPEAKER_01]: I partant I had to break down over it and said she wanted to do this.

[00:19:20] [SPEAKER_01]: I asked her if she was sure better conversation and she changed her mind.

[00:19:24] [SPEAKER_01]: We've done too much prepared too much, gotten too excited for the whole time together to just pull

[00:19:28] [SPEAKER_01]: up the clock. And there were several commenters really questioning

[00:19:32] [SPEAKER_01]: those she have the cancer again.

[00:19:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Obviously saying this is a shitty question to ask, etc etc, but OPP was responding to them and

[00:19:41] [SPEAKER_01]: said you're right, I'm really struggling with this thought. But if she makes another miraculous

[00:19:46] [SPEAKER_01]: recovery, I'm going to feel like a massive dig because everyone will be celebrating and to be honest,

[00:19:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I'll be furious, jaded and distrusting. My father is a very distrusting man.

[00:19:57] [SPEAKER_01]: He raises his exact same point and he said he's not sure if he believes the diagnosis is bad

[00:20:02] [SPEAKER_01]: as she is saying it is, but we're C in the worst way possible.

[00:20:07] [SPEAKER_01]: So OPP comes in with her out there and says people are asking for updates about my post

[00:20:12] [SPEAKER_01]: a couple of weeks ago. The lead up to the wedding was a bit nigh marriage.

[00:20:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Just to end law tried to tell someone that they couldn't come to the wedding because of

[00:20:20] [SPEAKER_01]: something they said. They told sister and law she could only afford a really nice new carb because

[00:20:24] [SPEAKER_01]: in a partner are staying with her dad and he's paying all her medical bills.

[00:20:30] [SPEAKER_01]: We curb that by changing our seating plan last minute. Asking the person to comment,

[00:20:35] [SPEAKER_01]: he still came thankfully. And the plan was to go up to the town the wedding was in for a few

[00:20:39] [SPEAKER_01]: days for my wife to spend time with her family. We paid for a little brother and little cousins

[00:20:44] [SPEAKER_01]: accommodation because they couldn't afford it. We've been waiting sister and law convinces

[00:20:48] [SPEAKER_01]: both little brother and cousin to only travel up but only the wedding. Not to stay with family.

[00:20:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Sister and law wasn't travelling up because of some vague and chaining reason.

[00:20:58] [SPEAKER_01]: There was a fight on their family side. It supposedly got resolved in sister and law

[00:21:02] [SPEAKER_01]: got given the hard word. But then little cousin didn't come up with family and stayed home

[00:21:07] [SPEAKER_01]: with sister and law. I told my partner if I wrecked the past as on sister and law.

[00:21:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I was in a different accommodation for the lead up. If there is a medical event,

[00:21:16] [SPEAKER_01]: I'll call and cover the cost for an ambulance at the smallest hiccup. If she plays up,

[00:21:21] [SPEAKER_01]: husband will take a home immediately from without argument. Or myself and the other two

[00:21:26] [SPEAKER_01]: expounds of groomsmen will kick them out. If a family don't want this to happen,

[00:21:31] [SPEAKER_01]: then they will get this sorted before I do because they disappointed me with their soft approach.

[00:21:35] [SPEAKER_01]: And now they've all been warned. Edit. The dance happened but on our terms. It was when the

[00:21:42] [SPEAKER_01]: dance fought open to everyone and was a happy song. And the day went off without a hitch. It was

[00:21:47] [SPEAKER_01]: beautiful, perfect, happy fun and everything we wanted it to be. No drama, no major issues.

[00:21:55] [SPEAKER_01]: My new wife loved every moment. She was spoiled and made to feel special.

[00:22:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you all for the suggestions and kind words. We signed mother and daughter's sister in

[00:22:05] [SPEAKER_01]: law for the day. It was almost a hiccup when sister and little uncle reversed her brand new car

[00:22:10] [SPEAKER_01]: into my ring bearous car. And sister and little started firing up. But it was curved.

[00:22:16] [SPEAKER_01]: A beautiful day because of your guy's support. So truly thank you.

[00:22:22] [SPEAKER_01]: O.P. later comes back into the comments about if cancer was real and said they did have

[00:22:28] [SPEAKER_01]: confirmation on the diagnosis but not the severity. But they're just not sure how bad it is yet.

[00:22:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Well I can say it is that I'm glad that things did go in a positive way for O.P. And that

[00:22:39] [SPEAKER_01]: made the dance on their terms. And you know they're wedding just was a positive experience and

[00:22:45] [SPEAKER_01]: O.P. and wife was made to feel special and not overshadowed on that particular day. But now I'm

[00:22:53] [SPEAKER_01]: going to turn this one to you guys. What do you guys make of this situation? Let me know your

[00:22:58] [SPEAKER_01]: thoughts down in the comments below. That's just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart

[00:23:01] [SPEAKER_01]: for getting involved in today's stories. You'll love your support your time. Always means the absolute

[00:23:06] [SPEAKER_01]: world. Thank you so so much and hopefully I'll see you in the next one. Take care. I'm much love.