My Boyfriend Insinuated His Ex Was "The One That Got Away" Then Called Me Insecure r/Relationships

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[00:00:30] Hey, Hey Waffle Gang.

[00:00:37] I do hope you're well.

[00:00:38] My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories

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[00:00:51] Now today's first story comes from throwawayaccount and says,

[00:00:55] I the asshole here for how I reacted when my boyfriend confirmed

[00:00:59] that his ex was the right person wrong time.

[00:01:03] My boyfriend and I are in our late 20s

[00:01:05] and have been seriously together for one year now.

[00:01:08] We were hanging out with some of his friends

[00:01:09] and they fondly talked about his ex who he dated for over four years

[00:01:14] and broke up because she got a job in a new city and broke up.

[00:01:17] I thought everything was fine until a girlfriend told me

[00:01:20] that she heard my boyfriend say that his ex was the right person wrong time

[00:01:25] and cautioned me.

[00:01:27] When we got home, I asked him this and he confirmed they said that

[00:01:30] and I just hated how cavalier his response was.

[00:01:34] He said sure, she was the right person at the wrong time

[00:01:36] but I've moved on and love you now like he doesn't get it.

[00:01:40] I don't want to be someone he has to move on to.

[00:01:44] I didn't see why he didn't see a problem with what he said.

[00:01:46] Sure, might be faithful to me,

[00:01:49] but it gave me the egg that for him that she's the one who got away.

[00:01:53] I told him all of my feelings and accused me of being insecure.

[00:01:57] I said that I needed some space to think about our relationship

[00:02:00] and whether I can continue being with someone who still considers an ex

[00:02:04] that one great love of his life and not his current partner.

[00:02:08] Am I the insecure one here?

[00:02:10] Look, I've been in relationships before and yes,

[00:02:13] I did love them at the time,

[00:02:14] but meeting my current partner trumps all of those past feelings

[00:02:18] and I never had this philosophy that the right person breaks up with you

[00:02:21] because I believe in the saying that if they wanted, they would.

[00:02:25] Makes it easier to move on.

[00:02:28] What it feels dense my trust in this relationship

[00:02:30] and makes me feel like I'm not worthy of being his biggest love.

[00:02:34] Am I the asshole here?

[00:02:37] So the first commenter says many, many people have the one that got away.

[00:02:42] That shouldn't in any way affect their love or their feelings for those

[00:02:45] in their lives in the present.

[00:02:47] Opie says the problem is he verbalized that his ex was the right person for him

[00:02:52] to others and to his own partner.

[00:02:54] We are all allowed to have private feelings about who we thought we could have ended up with.

[00:02:59] In my case, I had a serious relationship too

[00:03:02] and it also ended because of external factors.

[00:03:04] I didn't want us to break up then.

[00:03:06] Even I thought they were the right person for me so to speak,

[00:03:10] but I'm glad we separated because nothing trumps the feelings of gratitude

[00:03:14] of being with your current partner.

[00:03:16] The matter is, does he feel grateful looking back that he is no longer with her

[00:03:21] because he's with me?

[00:03:23] Because that's the only thing I care about at this point.

[00:03:25] I want alignment here.

[00:03:27] If he isn't glad he broke up with her, then it's a no go for me.

[00:03:31] Someone responds to that and says, what do you mean by that?

[00:03:33] Him being glad is a no go.

[00:03:35] Opie says you can be perfectly happy about a heartbreak you experienced in the past

[00:03:39] because a much better person came along.

[00:03:42] Opie continues saying speaking in hindsight of course.

[00:03:45] I may not be happy when I was experienced in the heartbreak,

[00:03:48] but I am now happy that I experienced the heartbreak in the past

[00:03:51] because I found a better partner in my present because of that.

[00:03:55] Time will tell if I really want to be with him given the shaky grounds here.

[00:03:59] You can be happy about sad events in the past

[00:04:01] if that leads to much better outcomes.

[00:04:04] For example, you can be happy your dream company turned you down from a job

[00:04:08] because you found something even bigger and better

[00:04:10] which you wouldn't have got had you not gone through the heartbreak

[00:04:14] of being rejected from that job.

[00:04:16] You can be happy that you got cheated on in the past

[00:04:18] because it saved you from building a life with that person.

[00:04:21] You can be happy you broke up with that boyfriend who dated you for five years

[00:04:25] and didn't propose to you because being in that relationship

[00:04:28] kept you from finding your husband.

[00:04:30] This isn't about being happy in the sense that

[00:04:33] you're going all out partying throughout as you are experiencing heartbreak

[00:04:37] but making peace with the fact and knowing in your heart

[00:04:40] that you will always choose the present if given the choice.

[00:04:42] What reality you get to have?

[00:04:44] Someone says to OP,

[00:04:46] Roncom's where he winds up with the XR based on less.

[00:04:49] You deserve to be his only choice.

[00:04:52] OP says if we are really talking about Roncom's

[00:04:54] all I want is that if he sees himself in the third perspective

[00:04:58] he should want to ship himself with me and not as exes.

[00:05:01] Like not even say I ship myself with both A and B

[00:05:04] because both relationships have different strengths etc.

[00:05:07] I don't want him to entertain any other girl in mind

[00:05:10] even in that sense.

[00:05:11] Does that make sense?

[00:05:13] A commenter replies in 100%

[00:05:15] I also believe that they wouldn't have worked out.

[00:05:18] They let each other go because something was missing

[00:05:20] or they would have fought to stay together.

[00:05:23] Now does he know that?

[00:05:25] I don't know.

[00:05:25] That is a very interesting way to think.

[00:05:28] He made it clear to me that he won't do long distance

[00:05:30] because he can't do it.

[00:05:32] If I were to move away,

[00:05:33] he'd break up with me likely just the way he and his ex broke up.

[00:05:37] If let's say the right woman came in his life

[00:05:40] would she change this condition of his?

[00:05:44] Someone says to OP

[00:05:45] unsure of the context of him telling others

[00:05:47] but he only told you because you asked him

[00:05:50] would you rather have him lie?

[00:05:52] OP says

[00:05:53] I believe I did right by myself

[00:05:54] by asking him to confirm what he said

[00:05:57] because what he said isn't appropriate

[00:05:58] when verbalized to his own partner

[00:06:00] judging by the cavalier attitude he had.

[00:06:03] What matters the most is

[00:06:04] what he feels truly about me

[00:06:06] and what happened in his life.

[00:06:08] Maybe she's a nice girl who he once knew

[00:06:10] but that's all she is to him now

[00:06:12] and is he happy?

[00:06:13] He is no longer with her

[00:06:14] because he gets to be with me as a consequence of that breakup.

[00:06:18] I doubt he feels that way.

[00:06:19] A commenter replies to OP saying

[00:06:21] it isn't a competition.

[00:06:23] He can say he wish they could have worked it out

[00:06:25] while being glad he ended up with you.

[00:06:28] Feelings are complex.

[00:06:29] Look at it this way

[00:06:30] what if instead of them breaking up

[00:06:32] she died?

[00:06:34] You wouldn't expect him to be glad that she died

[00:06:36] just because he is happy to end up with you.

[00:06:38] Unless he is saying he wants her back now

[00:06:40] then it shouldn't be an issue.

[00:06:42] OP says

[00:06:43] I didn't prefer dating a widower for the same reasons

[00:06:46] I don't think it's appropriate for him to wish that they worked out

[00:06:50] and people were questioning OP on their thoughts about that

[00:06:52] so OP added some additional information and said

[00:06:55] I feel that dating a widowed person comes with many challenges

[00:06:59] blurring and bending of many rules

[00:07:01] that are applicable in normal relationships

[00:07:04] such as keeping photos, mementos, constantly talking about the late partner etc

[00:07:08] and those things make me uncomfortable.

[00:07:11] It's awful to wish that you're happy they died

[00:07:13] and that's exactly the reason I stay away from dating people with that kind of baggage.

[00:07:17] I don't expect these people to wish that they are happy their partner died

[00:07:20] and I shouldn't

[00:07:21] but I can always wish someone with living Xs to wish

[00:07:24] they're content with the fact their previous relationships ended

[00:07:27] and that those relationships ending is ultimately a good thing

[00:07:31] because those ending allowed him to find me

[00:07:35] then someone says to OP you need therapy because you're so insecure

[00:07:39] and trying to dictate how he feels.

[00:07:41] OP says I can't control what he feels

[00:07:44] but I can control who I choose to be with

[00:07:47] this is why I made this post

[00:07:49] to use it as a sounding board as whether him and I have the same feelings about each other

[00:07:54] have no intentions of changing his feelings

[00:07:56] just exploring what matters to me

[00:07:58] and assessing whether he feels the same way

[00:08:00] and decide whether to break up or to continue

[00:08:03] and the comments were back and forth on this

[00:08:06] between people arguing with each other about who's right and who's wrong

[00:08:10] but OP did come in with an update and said hi guys

[00:08:13] thanks for everyone who participated here

[00:08:15] I had already made up my mind about the relationship

[00:08:18] however just wanted to use Reddit as a sounding board to confirm what most people think

[00:08:22] and most of you agree with me so I felt secure in my decision

[00:08:26] Ian I had a talk

[00:08:28] it was clear that we're not aligned in the sense in

[00:08:31] how we feel about past relationships ending

[00:08:33] I asked him what he thinks that things ending with his ex is a good thing

[00:08:37] ultimately in hindsight because that allowed him to find me

[00:08:40] he disagreed with me and yet said is happy

[00:08:43] he has me and loves me

[00:08:45] but can't admit he's grateful for his past relationship ending

[00:08:48] I just can't reconcile the two statements

[00:08:50] it's too contradictory

[00:08:52] and I find it will eat away at me if I stay in this relationship

[00:08:55] we broke up

[00:08:57] like I said I don't condemn him for how he feels

[00:09:00] I simply think he isn't the man for me

[00:09:03] maybe he needs a girl who can understand him and probably has a history of being with someone

[00:09:07] she regrets leaving too

[00:09:09] anyway

[00:09:09] some people try to trick me into thinking that I am the insecure one

[00:09:13] when I ironically was the one who proposed at first

[00:09:16] I remembered what my therapist said about boundaries and feelings

[00:09:20] they're not right or wrong

[00:09:22] they're personal to each person and each relationship

[00:09:24] and if they work for two people

[00:09:26] why should anyone outside of you to have the right to comment on that

[00:09:30] condescending therapy to anyone is a bad thing

[00:09:33] because one of the most important reminders in therapy is

[00:09:37] you are there to figure out your own needs and feelings

[00:09:39] rather than accept something that's unacceptable to you

[00:09:43] my boundaries and feelings with the right person for me

[00:09:46] will clearly not harm anyone

[00:09:47] as I have no intent changing anyone's feelings or personality

[00:09:52] I will walk away

[00:09:53] so yes I conclude I am not insecure

[00:09:56] I'm just a person with differing needs in a relationship

[00:09:59] who needs to find someone whose values align with mine

[00:10:03] I'm not looking for a virgin or anything

[00:10:05] I've had enough experience with heartbreak myself

[00:10:08] I just want someone who only prefers to be with me

[00:10:11] regardless of how meaningful their past relationships were

[00:10:14] and I'll give them the same

[00:10:16] and I think that the breakup was inevitable in this situation

[00:10:20] and probably the best thing because their views don't align at all

[00:10:23] by the sounds of it

[00:10:25] but now I'm going to turn this one to you guys

[00:10:27] what do you guys make of this situation

[00:10:30] let me know your thoughts down in the comments below

[00:10:33] let's move on to another story

[00:10:50] with hot juicy pecan crusted chicken

[00:10:52] or garlic butter shrimp scampi

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[00:11:30] without the ads

[00:11:34] now before we do get into our next story

[00:11:36] there is homophobia within the story

[00:11:38] so if you do want to skip the story

[00:11:39] please feel free to do so

[00:11:41] timestamps are always down in the description

[00:11:43] add along with timeline below

[00:11:45] thank you

[00:11:46] and it's from am I the asshole throw away from the am I the asshole

[00:11:49] subreddit it does have an update as well

[00:11:51] and says am I the asshole for abandoning my siblings

[00:11:55] I'm not so sure how to format this other than just jumping right into it

[00:12:00] I female 17 and the oldest of three living with my two siblings

[00:12:05] female 14 and male 10

[00:12:07] and our mother

[00:12:09] a father left when my brother was born

[00:12:11] and afterwards we moved states closer to family for help

[00:12:14] since then I've been helping my mom with raising my siblings

[00:12:17] the best I can

[00:12:18] we've had family come over to help when I was busy

[00:12:21] and my mom was at work

[00:12:22] but for the most part it was just the four of us

[00:12:25] when we moved

[00:12:26] I was placed back in school as soon as I could be

[00:12:29] I've always been more quiet than most and living in a new state

[00:12:32] only made the social awkwardness worse

[00:12:35] but eventually I met another girl around my age

[00:12:37] and we started to become good friends

[00:12:39] the girl Alana and I started doing a lot together

[00:12:43] it only took a couple of years if not less

[00:12:45] to be considered like family

[00:12:47] a little over five months ago

[00:12:49] Alana and I started dating

[00:12:51] we took it very slow and kept it to ourselves

[00:12:54] last month when we hit five months

[00:12:56] she convinced me to tell my mom

[00:12:58] she was fine with the ex-boyfriends I've had

[00:13:00] and are based off prior comments

[00:13:02] seemed to support the LGBTQ plus community

[00:13:05] last Sunday

[00:13:06] I decided to tell her

[00:13:08] Alana spent the night

[00:13:09] because she wanted to be with me when I told my mom

[00:13:12] so in the morning we both sat her down with us at the dining table

[00:13:16] when we told her she freaked out

[00:13:18] she said all sorts of angry things at us

[00:13:22] my girlfriend and I tried to keep our cool

[00:13:24] but before the conversation was over

[00:13:26] I was in tears and she was clearly pissed

[00:13:29] that was the only time I've ever swore at my mother

[00:13:32] I left the house for a few hours

[00:13:34] I needed to relax and calm down

[00:13:36] before making any hasty decisions

[00:13:38] when I returned later

[00:13:39] I opened the door to see my suitcase packed

[00:13:41] and sitting next to the couch

[00:13:43] I took the hint, grabbed it and left again

[00:13:46] I've been staying with Alana since

[00:13:48] but it's difficult because her parents don't know about us either

[00:13:51] and they just know my mom and I got into an argument

[00:13:54] this week my phone's been blowing up with family members

[00:13:57] criticizing me for leaving my siblings and mom like that

[00:14:00] I can only assume they've been given one half of the story

[00:14:03] but maybe I'm wrong

[00:14:05] my mom hasn't called or messaged since

[00:14:08] I feel sorry but at the same time

[00:14:10] I don't know if she understands how she hurt me

[00:14:12] so read it

[00:14:13] am I the jerk here?

[00:14:16] So as always some people were asking questions

[00:14:18] someone said why did Alana convince you to tell your mom?

[00:14:22] Opie says she wanted to start easing into who we told

[00:14:25] our friends knew but that was them more finding out than being told

[00:14:29] she wanted to tell hers too

[00:14:31] but because of the remarks my mom made before

[00:14:33] which made it seem like she supported the community

[00:14:36] thought it'd be better to start with her

[00:14:38] now that I think about it

[00:14:39] my mom didn't yell at Alana as much as she did me

[00:14:43] I guess she's one of those

[00:14:44] they're fine just not related to me people or something

[00:14:48] seeing the number of comments about this

[00:14:49] I guess I should have clarified better

[00:14:51] Alana wanted to tell her parents too

[00:14:53] but thought it'd be easier to tell my mom first

[00:14:55] because she seemed like she'd be more supportive

[00:14:58] it's also easier to tell one before telling two

[00:15:01] wasn't so much convincing me to tell my mom

[00:15:03] but the two of us started coming out together

[00:15:05] starting with my mom

[00:15:07] now we're both scared to tell anyone else

[00:15:11] someone says is it possible your mom was more upset

[00:15:13] about you sharing a bed than anything else

[00:15:16] Opie says well a lack of a platonic relationship

[00:15:19] doesn't imply a sexual one

[00:15:21] we didn't say anything like that

[00:15:22] just that we're now romantically involved

[00:15:25] another commenter also said that

[00:15:27] we probably should have told her first and they're probably right

[00:15:30] hindsight is 2020 and all

[00:15:32] I've mentally blocked out a lot of what was said

[00:15:35] truth be told

[00:15:36] I'd love to give direct quotes for context but I just can't

[00:15:39] I have to believe that

[00:15:40] if it was mentioned during the start of the argument

[00:15:42] that her issue was us not telling her

[00:15:44] it wouldn't have ended up with me in tears and

[00:15:46] on someone else's couch

[00:15:49] so we have two updates on this one

[00:15:51] the first update comes one week later and says

[00:15:53] in my last post a lot of you sent some sweet comments my way

[00:15:57] I appreciate all the support

[00:15:58] even some of the more controversial comments did provide some great insight

[00:16:02] I took a lot of ease to heart and

[00:16:04] went to see if I can fix things

[00:16:06] firstly I called my father

[00:16:08] our relationship is strained being separated and not seeing each other often

[00:16:12] but he's made it to some of my bigger events since the divorce

[00:16:15] double digits sweet 16

[00:16:17] mostly birthday stuff but sometimes other things

[00:16:21] he never wanted us to move away

[00:16:23] just felt he couldn't handle a third kid at the time

[00:16:26] I digress

[00:16:27] I called him and it went to voicemail

[00:16:29] I found myself crying into the phone as I relived the past two weeks

[00:16:33] but I made sure to word it as

[00:16:35] mom kicked me out because I have a girlfriend

[00:16:38] he called me back a few hours later and said

[00:16:40] it's the what he can do to help

[00:16:41] and will keep me updated

[00:16:43] and asked me to do the same

[00:16:45] secondly on Tuesday

[00:16:46] I talked to a learner about us telling her parents

[00:16:49] between people saying I should to get their support and

[00:16:52] those saying I shouldn't in fear of more backlash

[00:16:55] it wasn't an easy choice

[00:16:57] I was hoping worst case scenario

[00:16:59] my dad would be able to help and

[00:17:00] in the best case would have three adults rooting for us

[00:17:03] she was hesitant

[00:17:04] seeing how things went with my mom but ultimately agreed

[00:17:10] we sat her parents down similarly to my mom

[00:17:12] when I say we

[00:17:13] I really mean she did most of the talking

[00:17:16] I was still worried things would go wrong

[00:17:18] she started off by simply explaining why I've been here

[00:17:21] for over a week during class finals

[00:17:23] we tried coming out to my mom

[00:17:25] which created an argument and

[00:17:26] led to me getting kicked out

[00:17:29] my father said he wished we had told him sooner

[00:17:31] and I'm sorry for failing you to

[00:17:33] for making this feel like an unsafe

[00:17:35] an unsafe place to be who you are

[00:17:38] Alana stepmom and dad talked for a few minutes before coming back with the new rules

[00:17:43] they wanted their couch back

[00:17:44] if that meant dusting off the air mattress from when we were kids

[00:17:47] or just getting some extra blankets

[00:17:49] they didn't really care

[00:17:50] we do us

[00:17:51] so as long as it isn't illegal

[00:17:53] and we don't get into any trouble

[00:17:55] but that said

[00:17:56] since I was now under their roof

[00:17:57] in a slightly less temporary way

[00:17:59] I'd have to start following the same rules Alana did

[00:18:02] curfew, grades, things like that

[00:18:04] all of which I agreed to

[00:18:06] her parents are going to take us back to my house today

[00:18:08] I want to give my mom another chance

[00:18:11] I mean I don't get how you can just walk away from someone

[00:18:13] after your entire life

[00:18:15] I'm either going to get documents I need

[00:18:17] or my mom back

[00:18:18] in the latter case

[00:18:19] I still don't know if I'm going back to sleeping there quite yet

[00:18:23] I'm still hurt

[00:18:24] after talking to my sister

[00:18:26] she understands and would rather me stay away if needed

[00:18:29] my brother's a little confused

[00:18:30] but says he just wants us all to be happy

[00:18:33] thank you all again for your overwhelming support and advice

[00:18:37] Opie adds a clarification to that post and says

[00:18:39] this was something I wanted to clarify in the post

[00:18:41] if I wasn't limited to 3000 characters

[00:18:44] after seeing people's reactions to the first post

[00:18:47] she wanted the two of us to start coming out together

[00:18:50] that's why she was with me when we first told my mom

[00:18:52] my mom seemed supportive

[00:18:54] and her parents never really hinted one way or the other

[00:18:57] until we told them

[00:18:58] telling one supportive person is easier than trying to tell

[00:19:01] two unknown people

[00:19:03] neither of us knew how it had to go

[00:19:04] so I don't fault her

[00:19:06] she feels awful about it still

[00:19:07] but I'm trying to reassure her

[00:19:09] that there was no way of knowing

[00:19:13] someone asked Opie then

[00:19:14] how did it go picking up your stuff

[00:19:15] Opie says

[00:19:16] she wasn't even there

[00:19:18] she was at work

[00:19:18] but all the documents we needed were left on the table

[00:19:21] so

[00:19:21] I guess that's that

[00:19:23] yes and my dad called ahead to make sure everything was ready

[00:19:26] so five months later

[00:19:28] Opie adds another update

[00:19:29] and says good evening friends and enemies

[00:19:32] all 209 of you who follow this account

[00:19:34] looking for an update

[00:19:35] lucky for you

[00:19:36] I was able to remember my password again

[00:19:38] and by the asshole doesn't allow for more than one update

[00:19:41] but on that note

[00:19:42] I can follow up more thoroughly here

[00:19:44] all the comments talking about legal action

[00:19:46] well none of those really got much input from me

[00:19:49] it just seemed like so much at the time

[00:19:51] and I knew the best way I could help my siblings

[00:19:53] was to be their escape when they need me to

[00:19:55] but also not to do anything to leave their residency

[00:19:58] as questionable as mine

[00:20:00] Alana and I are still together

[00:20:02] I'm very happy

[00:20:03] should be hitting 11 months at the end of this month

[00:20:06] by far the longest

[00:20:07] and most authentic relationship

[00:20:09] either of us have been in

[00:20:10] it's had some rough moments with family drama and all

[00:20:13] but frankly

[00:20:14] I wouldn't trade it for the world

[00:20:16] she even had me pitch in my thoughts

[00:20:18] when redecorating her room this summer

[00:20:20] trying to make it feel more like our room

[00:20:22] I guess

[00:20:23] lol

[00:20:24] a family has been incredibly sweet as well

[00:20:27] I feel like I've been such an inconvenience

[00:20:29] but they hardly seem to notice

[00:20:31] or at least try not to let me think I am

[00:20:33] and aren't all grandparents siblings here and there

[00:20:36] who don't agree with our lifestyle

[00:20:38] but they don't get shumored much by the rest of them

[00:20:41] heaven knows our biggest fighter

[00:20:43] is right by my side half the time

[00:20:44] my dad's been trying to help the best he can

[00:20:47] as little he can really do after all

[00:20:48] but he's trying

[00:20:50] I don't know how much he's talking to my mother in all of this

[00:20:52] if at all

[00:20:53] but I still appreciate his efforts

[00:20:55] and I wish it didn't take this to hear from him more

[00:20:58] but it's nice to know that he's looking out for me after all these years

[00:21:02] my sister and I have been doing things more now

[00:21:04] that school started back up

[00:21:06] I try to help her with her homework

[00:21:07] or just hang out to help blow off some steam

[00:21:10] she still wishes I was home for all of this

[00:21:12] but knows she wouldn't be either

[00:21:14] if she were in my shoes

[00:21:16] she also has been keeping me up to date with my brother

[00:21:18] he's starting to understand things more

[00:21:20] but she told me something I don't think I can forget

[00:21:23] she told me about my mom

[00:21:24] my mom has not taken things so well

[00:21:26] according to my sister

[00:21:27] she's a mess

[00:21:29] not as happy as she used to be

[00:21:30] is the easy way of putting it

[00:21:32] still taking care of my sister and brother

[00:21:34] trying not to let it affect them

[00:21:36] but noticeably not well

[00:21:38] apparently my sister has caught her

[00:21:39] lingering by my door a couple of times

[00:21:41] but she still hasn't messaged me

[00:21:43] since our falling out

[00:21:45] well apparently there's been a whole lot of miscommunication

[00:21:49] my mother packed my suitcase after our fight

[00:21:52] yes

[00:21:53] however she seemed to record

[00:21:54] hearing me say something about

[00:21:55] leaving before I stormed off

[00:21:58] after she calmed down and processed her emotions

[00:22:00] she packed the case and wrote a note

[00:22:02] the note was supposed to be on the coffee table next to my suitcase

[00:22:05] but I just must have missed it

[00:22:08] my sister paraphrased the note

[00:22:09] but she records it saying something along the lines of

[00:22:12] my mother apologizing for the argument

[00:22:14] saying she hopes I can forgive her

[00:22:16] but if not

[00:22:17] she wanted to make it easier for me to not be stuck in such an awful home

[00:22:20] for any longer than I needed to

[00:22:22] this had me confused because

[00:22:24] if that were the case

[00:22:25] why didn't she have a text or call me

[00:22:27] not even a letter or email

[00:22:30] why did nobody know of this note

[00:22:31] until my sister found it a couple of weeks ago

[00:22:34] what about the initial family blowback

[00:22:36] I'm honestly quite confused

[00:22:38] it's been some time though

[00:22:40] so I might try to establish some contact with my mother again

[00:22:43] to get some answers for myself

[00:22:45] I don't know what I'd do with them

[00:22:47] if anything

[00:22:48] I might update you again

[00:22:49] I might not

[00:22:50] only time will tell

[00:22:52] thank you guys for the support

[00:22:53] with the initial two posts of melodrama

[00:22:56] take care

[00:22:57] now if I was just going off my initial thoughts after that update

[00:23:00] I would say that that note didn't exist

[00:23:03] it all just feels too strange and convenient

[00:23:05] that there was a note next to the suitcase

[00:23:06] that said oh I don't want you to leave etc etc

[00:23:09] but if you do want to on my note

[00:23:10] I want to make it easy for you

[00:23:12] whether she's doing that to protect herself

[00:23:14] if you know word gets out that she kicked out a 17 year old

[00:23:17] her child who should be able to trust her mother

[00:23:20] and do what's best for her

[00:23:21] support her

[00:23:23] and has failed to do so at every turn

[00:23:25] and whatever she's told the family in between all this

[00:23:27] it's all going to be broken down when

[00:23:29] when OP speaks up and that's why this

[00:23:31] note is just come out of nowhere

[00:23:33] like I did give her the choice

[00:23:35] I just wanted to make things easier for her kind of thing

[00:23:37] but

[00:23:38] yeah I don't believe that note was there

[00:23:40] I hope OP continues to thrive in

[00:23:42] in what they're doing and getting the support that they need from

[00:23:45] you know her partner and that family

[00:23:47] but now I'm going to turn this one to you guys

[00:23:50] what do you guys make of this situation

[00:23:53] let me know your thoughts down in the comments below

[00:23:56] just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart

[00:23:58] for getting involved in today's stories

[00:23:59] your love support and time

[00:24:00] always means the absolute world to me

[00:24:02] so thank you so so much

[00:24:03] and hopefully

[00:24:04] I'll see you in the next one

[00:24:06] take care

[00:24:07] and much love

[00:24:12] music

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