Mother-In-Law Is Trying To Control What I Wear At My Wedding r/Relationships

[00:00:00] Hey, I'm Ryan Reynolds. At Mint Mobile, we like to do the opposite of what Big Wireless does.

[00:00:05] They charge you a lot, we charge you a little. So naturally, when they announced they'd be

[00:00:09] raising their prices due to inflation, we decided to deflate our prices due to not hating you.

[00:00:15] That's right! We're cutting the price of Mint Unlimited from $30 a month to just $15 a month.

[00:00:20] Give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch.

[00:00:36] Hey, Waffle Gang! I do hope you're well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit

[00:00:41] stories. And if you do love a Reddit story, why not consider hitting that like, subscribe, maybe

[00:00:46] that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now,

[00:00:53] today's first story comes from 1273 Rockefeller who says, I'm either asshole for telling my

[00:00:59] mother-in-law I'll pay for my wedding myself if she can't respect my few wishes.

[00:01:05] I, 25 male, will be marrying my fiancé G, 25 female later on this year. I proposed to her a

[00:01:13] little bit before Christmas and were aiming for a November wedding. G has two older brothers,

[00:01:19] only one of which has gotten married. And for one reason or another, my mother-in-law,

[00:01:23] 68 female was not involved in the planning of the wedding at all. She was pretty hurt over

[00:01:29] this says she always wanted to help plan her children's weddings. So when we got engaged,

[00:01:33] she offered to pay for most of the wedding and in return, we agreed to let her help with the

[00:01:37] planning. In my mind, as long as I'm marrying G, I'm happy. Though I was okay with this.

[00:01:44] The only thing I'm really sticking to that I refuse to change is what I'm wearing.

[00:01:48] My mother died when I was very young and she was the daughter of first generation Scottish

[00:01:53] immigrants. My grandparents moved from the north of Scotland in the 60s and my mother was

[00:01:58] brought up learning about her parents culture. Then she died, I decided I wanted to wear her

[00:02:04] family's kilt when I got married. I talked about this with my fiancé before we got engaged because

[00:02:10] it is an unorthodox idea that she thought it was sweet and like the idea. A few days ago,

[00:02:16] my mother-in-law came up to me and told me I'd have to wear a more traditional tux instead

[00:02:21] of a kilt. When I asked her why, she said it went against the view she had of G's wedding

[00:02:27] and that the colours of my mother's tartan clashed with the colours she had chosen for the wedding.

[00:02:32] When I told her this was pretty much the only thing I'm unwilling to budge on,

[00:02:36] she brought up how she's paying for most of the wedding and wearing a tux is the least I could do.

[00:02:42] When I brought this up to G, she echoed the sentiment her mother had made about

[00:02:46] paying for the wedding. I'm able to pay for it myself and I told G that I thought she

[00:02:51] understood how important this connection to my mother was to me, especially since

[00:02:56] she can't be there. And if she wasn't able to accept that, then I'd pay for the wedding myself.

[00:03:02] She told me I was being a bit of a dick for being this stuck to what I want to wear.

[00:03:06] And once my mother-in-law heard that I would just pay for the wedding myself,

[00:03:10] she got really upset because it's always been her dream to plan G's wedding.

[00:03:14] I'm feeling like a bit of a dick right now and was wondering if I should just wear a standard

[00:03:19] tux. My family's kilt is really important to me but this is causing more conflict than

[00:03:24] I thought it would. Now alarm bells were going off in the first paragraph to me when it says

[00:03:31] the brother's only one of which has got married and for one reason or another mother-in-law was

[00:03:36] not involved in the planning of the wedding at all, which you know may have just been one of those

[00:03:41] things but after this post it says a lot to me. And in the stories we see a lot of where one

[00:03:49] partner defends like the mother-in-law or the father-in-law of this, it's a worry for your future

[00:03:55] isn't it? That you know she's calling you a dick in this situation wanting to wear something that

[00:03:59] means the world to you. Imagine if your partner came up to you I'd be like oh yeah absolutely we

[00:04:05] need to include that within the wedding. It just says to me that your fiancee values her mother's

[00:04:10] opinion and choices and possibly money more than you but Raymond Beaumont says this

[00:04:17] should be a really good learning lesson and the point of it is should the wedding take place.

[00:04:22] The only opinions and wants that matter in this relationship seem to be of your mother-in-law

[00:04:27] and so are you willing to be an afterthought in your own marriage? Argonis says red flag in my

[00:04:34] opinion it appears fiancee is focused more on the wedding than on the marriage. You've been

[00:04:38] relegated to the back row with your preferences cast aside like you said your fiancee knows

[00:04:44] the importance and apparently just doesn't care. Famous tap says tell mother-in-law that if she

[00:04:51] wants to see a standard tux at your wedding so much she should wear one. Sassy I love it.

[00:04:58] Noir Shield says not the asshole but I bet fiancee would sing a different tune if her

[00:05:02] mother picked out her wedding dress that she didn't like and played the she's paying card.

[00:05:08] See beside the seaside says and replied to that too right if you're getting married

[00:05:13] why would you want to wear something so common and overdone like this is about two individuals

[00:05:18] coming together the preferences of one person shouldn't be completely ignored in order to have

[00:05:23] some aesthetic it's not about fucking photographs it's about people. Redo Raptor says not the

[00:05:30] asshole and you're getting a glimpse right now of how life will be if you marry this person.

[00:05:35] You told her one thing was important to you and she could do whatever she wants for everything

[00:05:39] else she ostensibly agreed and now your needs are immaterial and you're a dick for wanting

[00:05:44] anything at all your way. You'll be making a huge mistake marrying this person your mother-in-law will

[00:05:51] stomp all over your boundaries and more importantly your wife doesn't give a crap how you feel and

[00:05:56] will happily join her mom in stomping on them and then go dave her on you and make it like

[00:06:00] she's the victim and you're being an asshole to any wants or needs at all this is red flag

[00:06:07] walk away or you will regret it I absolutely guarantee it so op does come in with an update and says

[00:06:16] so the past 24 hours or so have been a vent for I took most people's advice and talked to my

[00:06:22] fiancee about this issue before going forward her siding with a mother like this and going

[00:06:26] against me was really at a character so I felt like I really needed to figure out what was on the

[00:06:31] go along on the short of it comes down to money she doesn't make as much of a salary as I do

[00:06:37] I make almost two and a half her salary despite this she's pretty insistent on things being 50 50

[00:06:42] between us our finances aren't combined into after marriage because of some weird tax issues

[00:06:48] and legal things in our home region but even with me making more she insists we're a team

[00:06:52] and have to go 50 50 on big things rent car payments electrical wedding etc but even though

[00:06:59] I'm able to pay for the wedding myself she's not able to pay for the half she feels like she

[00:07:03] would want to pay because of this she's really clinging to the idea of a mother paying for our

[00:07:08] wedding even though I'd be more than happy to pay for it all myself we talked yesterday evening

[00:07:13] and she said that since she accepted her mother paying for the wedding their relationship has

[00:07:17] become pretty strained with mother-in-law pretty much taken over the wedding planning

[00:07:22] apparently mother-in-law was initially pushing for a tropical destination wedding in Jamaica

[00:07:27] an idea G put down quickly as she knows I hate the idea of destination weddings

[00:07:32] and mother-in-law had even tried to get a final say on the dress G was going to wear as well as

[00:07:37] she wanted a final say over who the bridesmaids were she wanted her friends daughters who G is not

[00:07:43] close with in the party had a pretty good relationship with mother-in-law so far so they

[00:07:48] found it kind of odd how she went total mom zilla but I've noticed her and G drifting

[00:07:54] a bit although I never thought it was related a few people thought that G actually hated the idea of

[00:08:00] the kilt and had mother-in-law acting as the bad guy to try and change my mind and you are not

[00:08:05] completely wrong she doesn't hate the idea but really doesn't like the other male members of

[00:08:10] the bridal party will be wearing tuxes while myself and my cousin would be wearing kilt

[00:08:15] she wanted consistency across the board and had expressed this to her mother mother-in-law

[00:08:20] took this as an opportunity to get me to wear a tux instead of getting the groomsman to wear kilt

[00:08:25] and had the wedding colors changed without G's knowledge to contrast with my family's tartan

[00:08:30] when I talked to G yesterday she said that she had just gotten out of a massive fight with her

[00:08:35] mother over changing the colors and really wasn't in the mood to start another argument

[00:08:39] with her she acknowledged she was in the wrong for siding with her mom and seemed genuinely

[00:08:44] sorry she said that in the stress of planning a wedding while having an overbearing mother

[00:08:49] she had thought of the kilt as another detail that's forgotten the significance of it to me

[00:08:55] and that she was really sorry in the meantime a few changes have been made my mother-in-law is no

[00:09:01] longer paying for the wedding and no longer involved in planning I'm going to pay half

[00:09:05] as G never wanted me to pay more than half by myself for something that's for both of us

[00:09:10] my father-in-law is covering the parts that G is going to have some trouble covering

[00:09:15] mother-in-law is unaware of this father-in-law and mother-in-law are still together

[00:09:19] however he's not telling her he's helping pay we're still getting married in November

[00:09:24] wedding colors have been changed back to match my kilt and we've decided to rent kilt's our

[00:09:28] regional tartan for the rest of the groomsman so they match the aesthetic thankfully no deposits

[00:09:35] were put down on things like tux rentals brice mace dresses or decorations so no money lost

[00:09:40] I know a lot of people told me to reconsider marrying G and going into our talk last night I

[00:09:45] really was but I'm happy with how things turned out since this really was an anomaly in her behavior

[00:09:52] I'm really excited to marry her now I'm glad that they're able to sort of navigate their way

[00:09:58] out of the situation and get mother-in-law to stop planning because clearly she was causing

[00:10:03] major issues within their relationship but I can also see like I'm not trying to be a downer

[00:10:09] on this as well the whole 50-50 thing causing further issues down the line because clearly she

[00:10:15] wants 50-50 but can't afford it so it's going to cause some issues and one of the things that I've

[00:10:20] seen in the past mentioned in these stories is like 50-50 but based on your annual income kind of

[00:10:25] thing so basically you're using the same percentage of money as each other but anyway I really hope

[00:10:32] things do work out for you in the future much love to you and let's move on to another story

[00:10:41] millions of people have lost weight with personalized plans from noom like evan who can't stand

[00:10:46] salads and still lost 50 pounds salads generally for most people are the easy button right for me

[00:10:53] that wasn't an option I never really was a salad guy that's just not who I am but noom worked

[00:10:58] for me get your personalized plan today at noom.com real noom user compensated to provide their story

[00:11:06] in four weeks the typical noom user can expect to lose one to two pound per week individual results

[00:11:10] may vary neat new glasses or want a fresh new style warby parker has you covered glasses started

[00:11:16] just 95 bucks including anti-reflective scratch resistant prescription lenses that block 100

[00:11:21] percent of UV rays every frames designed in house with a huge selection of styles for every

[00:11:26] face shape and with warby parker's free home try on program you can order five pairs to try at home

[00:11:31] for free shipping is free both ways to go to warby parker.com slash covered to try five pairs of

[00:11:37] frames at home for free warby parker.com slash covered now our next story comes from the am I

[00:11:46] wrong subreddit from realistic gas 7711 and says am I wrong for canceling our wedding

[00:11:54] we have been engaged for three years my fiance went on a trip of a lifetime six weeks in Europe

[00:12:00] she decided that we would take a break in our relationship allowing me no input in the decision

[00:12:05] I called her the day she left and had me blocked though I cancelled our marriage and

[00:12:10] her moving in with me in March she called me today to inform me of her arrival time on

[00:12:15] Thursday morning which I answered what does that have to do with me they've since blocked

[00:12:20] edit I should explain better I was fine with a trip in her old college sisters in fact I

[00:12:26] dropped at the airport and took her to boarding that is when she dropped the whole break thing on

[00:12:30] me didn't explain it just told me matter of fact and left I called her the rest of the day

[00:12:36] and tried to call her when I was able to the rest of the week after five days of ignoring

[00:12:40] me I had enough that the wedding was off she could move in with someone else because

[00:12:45] it's not going to be me left me with so many questions like why you've been engaged for three

[00:12:50] years is this normal behavior for her a partner saying to me they're going on a six week trip and

[00:12:57] oh just before I do go on this trip I let's just put our relationship on hold while I go

[00:13:02] you know it says it all really doesn't it and then the audacity to call you on return and

[00:13:10] happy pecs and have everything ready for me but the first commenter says she blocked you for six

[00:13:15] weeks to go to Europe on a break so she could bang people I'm so sorry that happened to you

[00:13:20] I'd broken up with my partner if you block me just because he goes on the trip if she wants

[00:13:25] to be free before the marriage she would do it again not wrong a commenter called dark moon

[00:13:31] struck says not wrong at all she decided that she wanted to screw away through Europe

[00:13:35] before getting married gave you no say in the matter and broke up well only one side has to

[00:13:40] decided end a relationship for it to be over she ended it and now you're decided to keep it that way

[00:13:46] I wish I could see her face when she realizes all the wedding plans have been cancelled

[00:13:50] I do hope you informed everyone of what was going on and why you were cancelling before

[00:13:54] she had the chance to start trying to claim you cheated on her or making up whatever other

[00:13:58] excuses she wanted six weeks to go bang as many men as she could without any concern for you

[00:14:04] now she gets to face the consequences of that she's not the kind of woman you want to put a ring on

[00:14:09] end of so op had some comments of their own which served as kind of little updates so they said

[00:14:15] told my parents immediately and they were shocked it says our friends I waited I shouldn't have

[00:14:19] maybe it means our friends said I shouldn't have maybe but I was embarrassed and depressed

[00:14:25] at most of the last few weeks feeding sorry for myself from pain shopping I sent out a message

[00:14:29] to our group chat informing them that our wedding and relationship are off and my phone

[00:14:33] has been blowing up ever since hope you had another comment sent update ish we have a group chat amongst

[00:14:40] people close to us today I informed them all that our marriage is cancelled and our relationship

[00:14:44] is over did that about 10 am chat quite literally exploded starting with questions about what

[00:14:50] happened which I answered honestly about 2 pm she just started asking me to call us so we

[00:14:56] could discuss this I told her that talking on chat is perfectly fine and she said no this is

[00:15:01] something between just us still not spoken with her the last message at 6 pm these picked me up

[00:15:07] at the airport so we can talk about this is planned I answered her that was your plan not mine

[00:15:12] none of this was my plan a flight is at 9 am I wish her luck hope you had another update and

[00:15:19] says first I got my ring back and it's safe with my mom secondly I would like to thank

[00:15:24] everyone for keeping me grounded while I was doubting myself I'm not sure who said it but someone

[00:15:28] said that I shouldn't bother with what she did on a trip and focus on her breaking up with me at the

[00:15:33] airport which I did and was not what she was prepared to argue about so now she knows how it

[00:15:38] feels to be blindsided also seems her college sister's told her I would be insecure and fight

[00:15:43] about something I couldn't hope to prove so when I didn't she didn't know what to do

[00:15:47] at one point she excused herself to go to the restroom and didn't come back for 20 minutes

[00:15:52] seems the brain trust was at a loss too so have any vacation ideas so my first thoughts was she

[00:15:58] going to the bathroom to cry or was she going to get some contact or some advice and op suggested no

[00:16:06] I imagine she is calling an emergency meeting with a coven of witches and there was a lot of

[00:16:11] chat about op going to visit various countries to get away from it all because they've been

[00:16:16] saving for a house themselves so they got plenty of money stashed away but op came with another

[00:16:21] comment that said spoke with her parents last night woke me up they must have forgotten about

[00:16:26] the time difference between coasts they offered to pay for couple's therapy to help us work through

[00:16:30] this rough patch as her mother called it told them no thank you she ended our relationship

[00:16:37] someone asks op if they told their parents op said told my parents in the first week

[00:16:41] my parents told me to calm down and don't do anything out of anger so I sat on it spoke

[00:16:46] with my work buddies in the fourth week or so when she called and acted like nothing bad had happened

[00:16:52] it shook me and I posted on reddit that I just been reading on cheating stories and seeing what the

[00:16:56] outcomes of stories like mine op adds it's not resolved she is not given up she thinks she can

[00:17:02] fix this followed by she went by my work I was at a job site thank god so you can see this one

[00:17:09] isn't at a complete end right now I pretty much think that the relationship is over from what

[00:17:14] it sounds like and rightfully so that it's never going to be fixed whether she will continue to

[00:17:20] try and make it up to op is another thing but even though op said he's let people know do they really

[00:17:26] know the full truth of this surely anyone looking from the outside is going that's a red flag what

[00:17:31] she did right there because the parents talking about like it's just ah it's just a blip in the

[00:17:35] road you know one of those relationship problems no she broke up with you to go

[00:17:40] what we're all assuming is to sleep around gave you no choice in the matter and put you on block

[00:17:46] that was the end of the relationship right there but what would you do in this situation

[00:17:53] some people suggesting you know if she continues down this path of you know turning up at places

[00:17:58] where you are see if you can get some kind of you know restraining order put on a keeper away

[00:18:02] from you imagine doing that and think that you can still you know make this up somehow

[00:18:08] madness and for our next story but i've been missing it a little bit we're gonna go to the

[00:18:14] entitled people subreddit little bit of neighbor drama going on around from milas to says neighbor

[00:18:20] offered my mom one dollar for part of her property after expanding his driveway into part of her

[00:18:26] front yard this might be in the wrong place for this is a combo of entitlement and general

[00:18:31] terrible nests my 74 year old mom's neighbor mid 60s male decided he needed a bigger driveway

[00:18:38] so it could fit four cars including the ones belonging to his two children who no longer

[00:18:43] lived there my mom somewhat reluctantly agreed under the condition that she pay for everything

[00:18:48] built over the property line and maintain the right to remove or build on top of the

[00:18:53] unreasonably large driveway a few years went by the neighbor wanted to sell the house and

[00:18:58] asked my mom to sell him part of the property he had built on to the part which she had also paid for

[00:19:05] a one dollar when she said no all hell broke loose he started showing up at her house with

[00:19:12] a video camera screaming at her for being a cruel woman who didn't want him to see his kids

[00:19:17] there is permit street parking and all residents on the block have two parking passes and you

[00:19:22] can request up to six temporary guest parking passes eventually she decided to have a surveyor

[00:19:27] come to determine the property line and built a fence to keep him and his family away from her

[00:19:33] when workers started pulling up part of the driveway on her side of the property line

[00:19:37] he got even more aggressive and ridiculous his wife showed up crying over how they can't live

[00:19:42] without the extra driveway space they started strategically parking their cars to make it

[00:19:47] difficult on the workers as possible they threatened to report the workers to ice

[00:19:52] despite having no knowledge of the immigration status of the workers in response they rather

[00:19:57] hilariously pulled up everything around and under the son's car so only the cars were still in the

[00:20:02] driveway and the son showed up at the door and told my mom I just made my first million dollars

[00:20:07] I'm going to buy the house and make your life miserable one day I was in the backyard and the

[00:20:13] guy was leaning over the fence yelled fuck you when I turned around he said oh I'm so sorry

[00:20:20] I thought you were your mother they eventually sold the house for nearly 500k under asking

[00:20:25] the new neighbors are lovely someone said to opi I hope you have some choice words for him when he

[00:20:30] explained his fuck you hope he says I wish I had some awesome response that made him run off crying

[00:20:35] but I was so shocked I just told him to go fuck himself I think that's a good response so do you

[00:20:42] think that was part of like a long game he was trying to pull you know get the drive extended

[00:20:47] you can get more cars on the drive therefore increasing your house price not sure if it

[00:20:50] works like that it did pop in the old noggin there and I'm sorry for laughing at the fuck you bit but

[00:20:56] it sort of took me by surprise at the same time as well you know it must have been shocking for

[00:21:01] someone to suddenly peer over the fence and shout fuck you but it was also like the apology afterwards

[00:21:06] he went oh I'm sorry I thought you were your mother like they're expecting to opi and turn

[00:21:10] around so oh yeah absolutely no problem then carry on neighbor drama man I absolutely love it

[00:21:20] now I'm going to turn this one to you guys do you have your own neighbor drama do you have maybe

[00:21:24] some of your own favorite neighbor drama stories that you'd like us to cover you could share them

[00:21:28] over on r slash mark narrations and hopefully we'll cover them at some point in the future you

[00:21:32] know how much I love that stuff anyway just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for

[00:21:36] getting involved in today's stories your love your support your time always means the absolute

[00:21:41] world to me so thank you so so much for being involved and hopefully I'll see you

[00:21:45] in the next one take care I much love tired of ads intruding into your favorite comedy podcasts

[00:22:21] good news ad-free listening is available on amazon music for all the music plus top podcasts included

[00:22:26] with your prime membership dive into a world of laughs by downloading the amazon music app for

[00:22:31] free or go to amazon.com slash comedy ad free that's amazon.com slash comedy ad free to

[00:22:37] catch up on the latest episodes without the ads