I'm Worried To Tell My Wife About An Incident With Her Best Friend r/Relationships

[00:00:03] [SPEAKER_00]: Hey, what's all going on? I do hope your well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories

[00:00:09] [SPEAKER_00]: And if you do love a Reddit story why not consider? And I like to subscribe maybe that notification bell too

[00:00:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Unless crack on with today's the story. Much love guys

[00:00:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Now today's story comes from TA Wife friend from the MIVRs all here subreddit

[00:00:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Before we do get into the story

[00:00:27] [SPEAKER_00]: I do want to give you a warning that we're talking about domestic violence and abusive relationship within the

[00:00:32] [SPEAKER_00]: story so if you do want to skip it please feel free to do so timescams are always down in the description

[00:00:36] [SPEAKER_00]: and long to timeline below. Thank you

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_00]: This titled MIVRs all here for not telling my wife about an incident with her best friend

[00:00:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Want to be very sensitive when writing it here but I've been dealing with unbearable guilt

[00:00:50] [SPEAKER_00]: and wanted to know what I am doing is wrong

[00:00:53] [SPEAKER_00]: I really do not want to trigger anyone but I will be writing about a very sad situation

[00:00:58] [SPEAKER_00]: I 33 male have been married to my wife 31 female for six years and we have a three year old kid

[00:01:06] [SPEAKER_00]: We are very happy together and I'm lucky to be married to a very kind and smart woman

[00:01:11] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife's best friend Anna fake name for an animity has been living with us for the last six months

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_00]: I wanted to talk about Anna and give full context of why I'm making my decision

[00:01:23] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna is my wife's best friend since school days

[00:01:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna was living in the city with her boyfriend and we live in the suburbs of that city

[00:01:32] [SPEAKER_00]: They seemed happy together and we're in a relationship for two years

[00:01:36] [SPEAKER_00]: However my wife noticed bruises on Anna's hand last year

[00:01:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Now asked her about it

[00:01:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Initially Anna dismissed it as work related injuries

[00:01:45] [SPEAKER_00]: A wife kept on probing and we learned that Anna was in an extremely toxic and abusive relationship

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_00]: A boyfriend lost his job last year and became extremely controlling and abusive to water

[00:01:57] [SPEAKER_00]: It constantly accused her of cheating

[00:02:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna denies it

[00:02:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Made her link her phone messenger to his computer and started micro managing finances

[00:02:07] [SPEAKER_00]: It was an incident of domestic violence that was the final straw

[00:02:11] [SPEAKER_00]: And my wife and I had to rush the hospital to look after Anna

[00:02:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Since Anna's parents are mostly absent from her life

[00:02:18] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife asked me if Anna can stay with us for a few days

[00:02:22] [SPEAKER_00]: We're three people living in a four bedroom house and have two spare guests rooms

[00:02:25] [SPEAKER_00]: I of course agree to it. The total of that Anna can stay with us as long as she wants

[00:02:30] [SPEAKER_00]: I think the incident completely broke Anna and she would just start crying randomly and completely shut down

[00:02:37] [SPEAKER_00]: I was really sad to see Anna in that state

[00:02:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Check the lever job, you to mental issues and stay at home in the room all day

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife is very kind and took care of Anna like she was family and made sure she felt loved

[00:02:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna is also thankful to my wife and I, a helper in our worst time

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Helps around the house with our kid

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Though we never leave Malone with Anna

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna now is coming back to normal

[00:03:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Smile sometimes and has started looking for a job again

[00:03:05] [SPEAKER_00]: Now onto the incident

[00:03:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Last Friday my wife and I went to work as normal and dropped our son at daycare

[00:03:12] [SPEAKER_00]: Added doctors appointment at noon and came straight home from there

[00:03:15] [SPEAKER_00]: As I did not have a lot of work in the office

[00:03:18] [SPEAKER_00]: I made some lunch and I went to my room to sit on my bed and reply to all the emails

[00:03:22] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna was in her room and I did not talk to her after I came home

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Around 2pm, I heard Anna's room door open and her walking in the hallway

[00:03:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Suddenly, I bedroom door opened and Anna walked in topless in just in her underwear

[00:03:37] [SPEAKER_00]: I was shocked and not sure how long I was staring at her

[00:03:41] [SPEAKER_00]: But after a few seconds I blurted out. I'm sorry and she quickly covered herself with her hands

[00:03:45] [SPEAKER_00]: She was a apologetic and started explaining herself

[00:03:49] [SPEAKER_00]: She said she just wanted to borrow my wife's clothes because her laundry was unwashed

[00:03:53] [SPEAKER_00]: It was super embarrassing to have a conversation with her in that state and I looked away

[00:03:58] [SPEAKER_00]: She again apologised and then went out of the bedroom

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_00]: The incident lasted less than two minutes

[00:04:04] [SPEAKER_00]: After a while, she came back again into our bedroom

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Will he dressed and apologize for the incident

[00:04:09] [SPEAKER_00]: She said it was really embarrassing and she did not know anyone will be home

[00:04:13] [SPEAKER_00]: I said it's okay and I should have told her I'm back early from the office when I came home

[00:04:18] [SPEAKER_00]: She asked me not to mention about the incident to my wife

[00:04:21] [SPEAKER_00]: She said she feels embarrassed. She walked around the hallway without clothes and that I saw her in that state

[00:04:27] [SPEAKER_00]: I said it's okay and let's forget about it

[00:04:31] [SPEAKER_00]: I have not told my wife about the incident and it's been five days

[00:04:34] [SPEAKER_00]: It was just a benign incident, but I somehow feel guilty about the whole thing

[00:04:39] [SPEAKER_00]: I feel more guilty that I'm lying to my wife by a mission of the truth

[00:04:43] [SPEAKER_00]: However, I feel that if my wife takes it the wrong way it may strain her relationship with Anna

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_00]: I feel really bad for Anna what she had to go through

[00:04:52] [SPEAKER_00]: I also do not want to make Anna uncomfortable in our house by telling my wife about her

[00:04:56] [SPEAKER_00]: Baging into our bedroom in that state

[00:04:59] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm either asshole in this case for not talking about this incident to my wife

[00:05:03] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm afraid that if Anna tells it to her first

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Or make me look really bad in guilty

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_00]: However, if I tell her I do not want her to blame Anna for any of this and not help her in a time of need

[00:05:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Can someone please help me on how I can tell my wife about this

[00:05:19] [SPEAKER_00]: Now I think first thing for me as always in these situations you need to speak your wife your relationship takes top priority here

[00:05:27] [SPEAKER_00]: And you need to tell her about it before it comes out either from Anna's lips

[00:05:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Or you slip up and then if you've hidden this from your wife your wife's gonna be fucking super concerned

[00:05:37] [SPEAKER_00]: Then she could be like what the hell and whether this was just an embarrassing accident or not

[00:05:43] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not sure I believe it one because there's two other updates on this of course

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_00]: But too you heard her walking around the house when you heard her open the door and walked down the

[00:05:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Walk down the landing yep she didn't hear you and of course there's always the chance it could be just a genuine mistake

[00:06:01] [SPEAKER_00]: But I'm not sure I believe it at this moment in time assuming she had permission to borrow the clothes in the first place

[00:06:07] [SPEAKER_00]: You'd afford you to cover that top up just in case someone else was in the house or walking around

[00:06:12] [SPEAKER_00]: You know one of the common areas of the house and once you open the door and saw you instead of immediately closing the door and going

[00:06:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, sorry she stood there and just sort of like put a hands over us out here and kept the apologise

[00:06:22] [SPEAKER_00]: I think it would just felt a bit weird to me at the same time as well again

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not saying it's not possible that it was just an embarrassing mistake, but at the moment it's on the side of not just a mistake

[00:06:33] [SPEAKER_00]: But I see doctor says you would be the asshole if you did not tell your wife

[00:06:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Never keep secrets as a team with your houseguest against your wife

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Another comment is says tell her gently just as you say or tell her before she tells your wife

[00:06:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Make sure you tell her you truly believe it was an accident as the conversation may just end up

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_00]: Helping her to at least keep her shirt on when out of her room if the friend is vindictive or think she wants to try and break up you and your wife

[00:07:01] [SPEAKER_00]: She may be the first to tell her and the story may change to you come into a room while she was sleeping topless

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_00]: And you creeping her the first stories are always the one to believe

[00:07:11] [SPEAKER_00]: But if it wasn't malicious what she did

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_00]: You aren't trying to kick her out and could have been an honest mistake, and it doesn't have to be anything more than that

[00:07:20] [SPEAKER_00]: All in to polka dot says if she really was walking into getting item of clothing

[00:07:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Assuming that she and your wife have that kind of clothes sharing friendship and she was truly not a

[00:07:30] [SPEAKER_00]: Where that you were home and this really doesn't sound like a big deal at all

[00:07:33] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a bit concerning that Anna is so worried about it

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_00]: Brantage is coming out of an abusive relationship

[00:07:39] [SPEAKER_00]: It really shouldn't have needed to be kept secret and it's clearly bothering you to do so

[00:07:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Say, this week the an awkward moment with Anna the other day that she felt really embarrassed about and didn't want to tell you

[00:07:51] [SPEAKER_00]: And I tried to honor that but I feel weird about keeping such a benign snap required

[00:07:56] [SPEAKER_00]: I came home from work early that one day and went straight to the bedroom to hang out

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_00]: A new Anna was home, but I haven't said anything to her to let in though I was home too

[00:08:04] [SPEAKER_00]: Was mining my own when she came into boron item of your clothing and she was topless because she didn't know it was home

[00:08:10] [SPEAKER_00]: In our bedroom, it was extremely embarrassed I've heard to my eyes immediately

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Explain about the clothes and apologize

[00:08:18] [SPEAKER_00]: It was awkward all around and then she exited and got dressed

[00:08:21] [SPEAKER_00]: You have any questions or concerns

[00:08:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Hope you reply, saying thanks. That is really helpful

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe I am overthinking this but I've read that in these situations the victims trust in men is very fragile

[00:08:34] [SPEAKER_00]: What if you horrible if I tell my wife after I told Anna or not mentioned about this incident

[00:08:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Should I talk about this with Anna first master maintenance says she tried to talk to you for nearly two minutes while topless

[00:08:46] [SPEAKER_00]: Sounds like she wanted to see what kind of time you're on

[00:08:49] [SPEAKER_00]: You need to tell your wife she deserves better

[00:08:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Blingeyems has your the asshole you're prioritizing another woman's wishes over your wife's right to know her husband

[00:08:59] [SPEAKER_00]: Seeing another woman nude in her home no less

[00:09:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Are you sure she didn't know you were in there who state you were cooking in the kitchen in home for an hour

[00:09:08] [SPEAKER_00]: Surely you are making noise

[00:09:10] [SPEAKER_00]: It's not uncommon for people with trauma to seek out comfort especially with someone they may see as a savior

[00:09:15] [SPEAKER_00]: And no brass seems really subtle. Are they even the same size if this were me? I would probably laughed with my friend

[00:09:23] [SPEAKER_00]: Not ask you to lie

[00:09:26] [SPEAKER_00]: The OPE comes back into the post with their first update says I wrote a post yesterday about an embarrassing situation

[00:09:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Happened between my wife's best friend was currently staying at our house

[00:09:36] [SPEAKER_00]: It was not sure how to bring it up to my wife and you guys really helped me a lot and understanding the urgency of telling my wife

[00:09:43] [SPEAKER_00]: I got some cool ideas on how to bring up the subject without making it awkward for anyone

[00:09:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Everyone saying Anna was doing it on purpose. I did not agree with it as I am extremely average looking person

[00:09:54] [SPEAKER_00]: And women don't chase me. I will have a thing since last night. I've just been crazy

[00:09:59] [SPEAKER_00]: Nothing I'm spiraling a bit

[00:10:01] [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry for the long post

[00:10:02] [SPEAKER_00]: So I decided to tell my wife last night as soon as you came home in about the incident

[00:10:07] [SPEAKER_00]: I liked the idea of jokingly bringing up cat bringing it up casually

[00:10:11] [SPEAKER_00]: So we both can laugh about it and then forget it

[00:10:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Last night when my wife came home. I made sure I stayed in our bedroom

[00:10:18] [SPEAKER_00]: I asked Anna if she could stay with my kid downstairs as my wife was changing

[00:10:22] [SPEAKER_00]: I asked her if Anna still borrow so close

[00:10:25] [SPEAKER_00]: And I had to borrow them regularly when she first moved long story

[00:10:29] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife told me yes and she has told Anna she can take anything from her closet if she needs it

[00:10:35] [SPEAKER_00]: They asked my wife if Anna told her about the funny incident from Friday

[00:10:39] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife said no and I told her the whole story about how I came home early

[00:10:44] [SPEAKER_00]: And Anna came into the room almost naked together close and how embarrassing it was for both of us

[00:10:50] [SPEAKER_00]: As my wife was listening to this she completely froze and turned pale

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_00]: She started murmuring in Spanish

[00:10:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Which is her and Anna's native language

[00:10:59] [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't understand Spanish very well, but I understood the words apologies about this pronunciation as always

[00:11:06] [SPEAKER_00]: One break a saddle and what a vase

[00:11:09] [SPEAKER_00]: And from a very quick google to again, you're going to have to forgive me here

[00:11:13] [SPEAKER_00]: The one break a saddle apparently means a married man who has a family tie

[00:11:18] [SPEAKER_00]: And then the other there means like again again. Thank you for Spanish made easy

[00:11:23] [SPEAKER_00]: For that

[00:11:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Hope you continued I asked her if she is okay

[00:11:28] [SPEAKER_00]: And she sat next to me and asked me to explain everything in detail

[00:11:32] [SPEAKER_00]: I just told her it was nothing and she must not have heard me coming in

[00:11:36] [SPEAKER_00]: I was trying to laugh at off but my wife had water in her eyes

[00:11:40] [SPEAKER_00]: I kept on telling her it was not a big deal, but she kept on asking me for more details

[00:11:45] [SPEAKER_00]: She asked me how Anna talks to me

[00:11:47] [SPEAKER_00]: I told her that Anna barely talks to me since she moved in

[00:11:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Except a few words here and there

[00:11:52] [SPEAKER_00]: By wife then asked me about three weeks ago

[00:11:54] [SPEAKER_00]: But my wife had gone to visit her parents for four days

[00:11:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna did not want to go with her and stayed back

[00:12:00] [SPEAKER_00]: I told her that Anna was just acting normal

[00:12:02] [SPEAKER_00]: She or I would cook dinner after I got home from work

[00:12:05] [SPEAKER_00]: While the other took care of the kid

[00:12:07] [SPEAKER_00]: The only thing different was Anna generally spending her evening in their room

[00:12:12] [SPEAKER_00]: However, when I was sitting in the living room watching TV after the kid slept

[00:12:16] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna came and sat on the sofa next to me but did not talk to me

[00:12:20] [SPEAKER_00]: I asked her if she wants me to change their channel or stream something she likes

[00:12:24] [SPEAKER_00]: And she said she just wanted to get out of a room

[00:12:27] [SPEAKER_00]: However, she did not flirt with me or do anything unusual

[00:12:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Canst du das? Do best morgens in Eilertzies, schnelldine, leapling, shirt and snubs the

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[00:12:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Keine Panik, per seel discs, reddened in-tag

[00:12:42] [SPEAKER_01]: With their craft-formal, besides themselves, the hard-nacchixens flaking

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[00:12:50] [SPEAKER_01]: And the rest, that makes a washing machine

[00:12:53] [SPEAKER_01]: While you always do your best, try the best discs from Pesir

[00:12:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Also, I tried to find a way to get out of the room

[00:13:03] [SPEAKER_00]: I kept on telling my wife that it was just an accident

[00:13:06] [SPEAKER_00]: I really did not understand why she reacted to emotionally to it

[00:13:10] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife refused to answer and just said, okay, I agreed with me

[00:13:14] [SPEAKER_00]: However, she told me she'd have told her about the incident sooner

[00:13:17] [SPEAKER_00]: And should not keep any secrets from her and gave me a big lecture

[00:13:21] [SPEAKER_00]: I told her that I did not think it was a big deal and thought Anna would tell her

[00:13:25] [SPEAKER_00]: But glad I brought it up

[00:13:27] [SPEAKER_00]: After dinner, my wife messaged Anna to join us and she came out

[00:13:31] [SPEAKER_00]: While talking, my wife brought up the incident and told Anna that I mentioned about the incident

[00:13:36] [SPEAKER_00]: And she does not need to feel embarrassed

[00:13:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Such things happen when we're all in the same house and it's not a big deal

[00:13:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna was first taken by surprise but then told my wife that she was just scared to tell her

[00:13:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Because she thought my wife would judge it because of her past

[00:13:51] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife gave her a stare and she quickly changed the topic

[00:13:55] [SPEAKER_00]: At night I asked my wife what the hell was going on?

[00:13:59] [SPEAKER_00]: I told her, please not keep any secrets from me

[00:14:01] [SPEAKER_00]: And if she does not tell me, we'll directly ask Anna about her past

[00:14:05] [SPEAKER_00]: What her past has got to do was anything

[00:14:07] [SPEAKER_00]: My first guess was Anna might have a thing for me before we got married or something

[00:14:11] [SPEAKER_00]: But my wife was very reluctant to answer and get on trying to change the subject and cuddle

[00:14:17] [SPEAKER_00]: However, I kept being persistent and she finally spilled the beans

[00:14:21] [SPEAKER_00]: Apparently when Anna was in her early 20s

[00:14:24] [SPEAKER_00]: She was in a relationship with a married co-worker who was twice her age

[00:14:28] [SPEAKER_00]: It was kind of a sugar daddy relationship

[00:14:31] [SPEAKER_00]: And he told her that he was in an open relationship

[00:14:34] [SPEAKER_00]: Well that's what Anna told my wife

[00:14:36] [SPEAKER_00]: And he would leave his wife in a few years once the kids go to college

[00:14:39] [SPEAKER_00]: This makes sense now because Anna is very pretty

[00:14:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Like Miss USA level

[00:14:45] [SPEAKER_00]: I never understood why she was single for most of the time I knew her

[00:14:49] [SPEAKER_00]: She eventually ended that relationship and started dating a boyfriend Jim

[00:14:53] [SPEAKER_00]: We turned out to be an abusive asshole

[00:14:55] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife said she suspects Anna was still involved with the older guy

[00:14:59] [SPEAKER_00]: While in a relationship with Jim

[00:15:01] [SPEAKER_00]: Which explains why he kept on accusing her of cheating

[00:15:04] [SPEAKER_00]: This is why my wife became emotional when I told her what Anna did

[00:15:08] [SPEAKER_00]: It was worried Anna has no boundaries regarding married men

[00:15:11] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife said that Anna always looks up to her some praises me for being such a loyal partner

[00:15:16] [SPEAKER_00]: And how lucky my wife is

[00:15:18] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife was worried initially when she brought Anna home

[00:15:22] [SPEAKER_00]: But her actions from the time when my wife was away

[00:15:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Early shows she respects the boundaries

[00:15:26] [SPEAKER_00]: And it must have been an accident

[00:15:28] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife told me she is grateful I let Anna live in our house and observe what a healthy

[00:15:33] [SPEAKER_00]: The happy marriage looks like

[00:15:36] [SPEAKER_00]: This morning was even more weird

[00:15:38] [SPEAKER_00]: I got up as I could not sleep well and went down for a cup of coffee

[00:15:41] [SPEAKER_00]: After five minutes Anna walked into the kitchen

[00:15:44] [SPEAKER_00]: And told me she was relieved my wife did not overact a Friday's incident

[00:15:48] [SPEAKER_00]: She said I'm a good husband and gave me a hug and a peck on the cheeks

[00:15:53] [SPEAKER_00]: She's never hugged me in the last six months

[00:15:55] [SPEAKER_00]: She seemed to be in a happy mood and was making small talk with me while having coffee

[00:16:00] [SPEAKER_00]: I cannot believe my wife did not tell me such a huge detail about Anna for all these years

[00:16:06] [SPEAKER_00]: It's completely possible she cheated all through the relationship with Jim

[00:16:10] [SPEAKER_00]: And my wife is just covering for her all along

[00:16:13] [SPEAKER_00]: She even kept it a secret from me

[00:16:15] [SPEAKER_00]: After giving me a lecture about how she never had secrets

[00:16:18] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know what else she is hiding

[00:16:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Everything just seems very confusing at this point

[00:16:23] [SPEAKER_00]: I feel angry at my wife lying to me all these years for Anna

[00:16:26] [SPEAKER_00]: I also now see Anna differently

[00:16:28] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm also worried that me trivialising the incident to my wife

[00:16:32] [SPEAKER_00]: might have sent wrong signals to Anna

[00:16:34] [SPEAKER_00]: Now firstly, I was a little bit annoyed at the same time that you got this big lecture which you know

[00:16:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely shouldn't be keeping secrets but then she was keeping this secret at the same time

[00:16:45] [SPEAKER_00]: It seems like it's a pretty big piece of information that was left out from the wife here

[00:16:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Something that's been at the forefront of her mind, but never told O.P about it

[00:16:56] [SPEAKER_00]: But again, I would tell this information this hug and the kiss

[00:16:59] [SPEAKER_00]: Certainly feels like testing those boundaries, you know after this incident happened

[00:17:04] [SPEAKER_00]: Immediately comes up to you gives you a hug and a kiss on the cheek something that's never happened before

[00:17:10] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, this is getting sus. I know you've said about Anna's history and what she's gone through

[00:17:15] [SPEAKER_00]: But it's time for Anna to go I think

[00:17:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Under Queen says Anna needs to go before our own messed up issues leader to further mess with your marriage

[00:17:24] [SPEAKER_00]: She was testing O.P again with the hug and kiss on the cheek and I didn't see O.P writing that he told his wife that new

[00:17:30] [SPEAKER_00]: Development she's got to go before she pushes to the next level

[00:17:34] [SPEAKER_00]: O.P says yes, I'm also a bit mad at myself for trying to casually describe the event as some of the

[00:17:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Regiders advise and not talk about the fact that she was in the room for a lot longer

[00:17:43] [SPEAKER_00]: I was worried that my wife would be pissed at me, but I wish I told her all the details and did not make it sound trivial

[00:17:49] [SPEAKER_00]: I wife now trust Anna and I'm getting more uncomfortable

[00:17:53] [SPEAKER_00]: To all the interviews says is clearly time for Anna to move out

[00:17:57] [SPEAKER_00]: I suggest you talk it over with your wife to set a date

[00:18:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Then both you sit down and let her know

[00:18:03] [SPEAKER_00]: She needs to know that this is coming from both of you

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_00]: Then be very careful to not be with Anna

[00:18:07] [SPEAKER_00]: If that's not possible have video cameras recording in your bedroom and the living room

[00:18:12] [SPEAKER_00]: It should help a lot in case of any incidents or accusations

[00:18:17] [SPEAKER_00]: Another comment to suggest that she's definitely testing the boundaries and O.P says

[00:18:22] [SPEAKER_00]: I've not told my wife yet

[00:18:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Things are a bit icy between us since yesterday as

[00:18:26] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm still upset at her for keeping secrets from me for all these years

[00:18:30] [SPEAKER_00]: I know it's Anna's personal life, but I feel a bit betrayed that for all these years

[00:18:35] [SPEAKER_00]: She knew Anna was with a married man and never even mentioned it to me

[00:18:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Get a talk in the evening and she apologized, but then we both dropped the subject and took

[00:18:43] [SPEAKER_00]: our son to the playground as the weather was finally nice and had an amazing time

[00:18:48] [SPEAKER_00]: However, I plan to tell her as soon as we are both our alone at night

[00:18:52] [SPEAKER_00]: As I said in the comments, I do not think she will mind is it's not uncommon for a friend to give a quick pick on the cheeks

[00:18:58] [SPEAKER_00]: When saying hello

[00:18:59] [SPEAKER_00]: In fact, I was not comfortable with it at the start

[00:19:02] [SPEAKER_00]: And now I'm used to it

[00:19:03] [SPEAKER_00]: Among cousins friends, everyone kisses me

[00:19:06] [SPEAKER_00]: There are also weird rules where married women like my wife just hug

[00:19:10] [SPEAKER_00]: But non-married friends give a kiss unless you're family

[00:19:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Also only girls give a kiss, but men don't kiss girls from the cheeks

[00:19:17] [SPEAKER_00]: I learn that the hard way

[00:19:19] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not Latino, well I'm being to be exact

[00:19:21] [SPEAKER_00]: And maybe someone who is familiar if I can explain the rules here so

[00:19:25] [SPEAKER_00]: People who don't know the tradition won't misinterpret it as anything sexual

[00:19:28] [SPEAKER_00]: Also I never keep anything from my wife and hence I felt so guilty about my actions

[00:19:33] [SPEAKER_00]: Last week, I'm sure I'll mention it to her before the end of the day

[00:19:38] [SPEAKER_00]: So six weeks later, O.B. comes in with another update and says

[00:19:42] [SPEAKER_00]: I like a few posts a month ago regarding my wife's friend Anna

[00:19:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Accidentally walking into our bedroom topless to get my wife's clothes while I was in the room

[00:19:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Be dressed the issues in the next day

[00:19:51] [SPEAKER_00]: I learn more about Anna's past and why my wife was uncomfortable due to the situation

[00:19:56] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife and I talked to Anna and told her it's not a big deal

[00:19:59] [SPEAKER_00]: We all decided to move on from the incident

[00:20:01] [SPEAKER_00]: After I posted the update a lot of you advised me to tell my wife about Anna hugging and kissing

[00:20:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Me on the cheek for following morning

[00:20:09] [SPEAKER_00]: I found uncomfortable with a situation in the comments really made me nervous

[00:20:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Most of you were reading my posts as a telenavela or a start of a poor movie

[00:20:18] [SPEAKER_00]: In the comments were really not helping me calm down

[00:20:21] [SPEAKER_00]: You may not like this part, but I just decided to get off Reddit for a while and try to think through the

[00:20:26] [SPEAKER_00]: situation on held to tell my wife

[00:20:29] [SPEAKER_00]: Very dear to me. I found that my wife treats Anna as family and just like her sisters

[00:20:35] [SPEAKER_00]: I've known my wife's sister since they were in their early teens

[00:20:39] [SPEAKER_00]: I've had similar incidents happen with them all the time and I never made a big deal out of it

[00:20:44] [SPEAKER_00]: There was so many times we had to tell them to keep their tops on when sitting in our backyard

[00:20:48] [SPEAKER_00]: All area when they were younger and God knows how allergic they are to wearing pants around the house

[00:20:54] [SPEAKER_00]: However, I just treat them as they are my sisters

[00:20:56] [SPEAKER_00]: I decided I need to do the same with Anna and treat her like my wife's sister

[00:21:01] [SPEAKER_00]: I also wanted to communicate that clearly to both Anna and my wife so they don't get in such uncomfortable situations anymore

[00:21:08] [SPEAKER_00]: At night, I was talking to my wife and decided to put a positive spin on the incident that happened early morning

[00:21:14] [SPEAKER_00]: I asked my wife if she noticed anything different with Anna

[00:21:17] [SPEAKER_00]: I told her that she woke up early with me today

[00:21:20] [SPEAKER_00]: And greeted me with a hug in a kiss and also helped me make breakfast

[00:21:23] [SPEAKER_00]: I told her that I'm glad she finally looks happy and is returning back to her old self

[00:21:28] [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm proud I am of my wife, but she has such a kind heart of person who helped the friend in need

[00:21:33] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife seemed happy with my comments and started saying that

[00:21:37] [SPEAKER_00]: She also noticed Anna was chat year in the morning

[00:21:39] [SPEAKER_00]: I was cleaning a room and talking about applying for jobs again

[00:21:43] [SPEAKER_00]: I tell my wife that I feel like Anna is like one of her sisters

[00:21:46] [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm happy she also considers us as family and it's comfortable around us

[00:21:51] [SPEAKER_00]: The next few weeks were great and I started waking up early in the morning around the time I woke up

[00:21:56] [SPEAKER_00]: By the end

[00:21:57] [SPEAKER_00]: He always had a coffee together and had nice chats

[00:22:00] [SPEAKER_00]: She also helped me with breakfast and get in lunch boxes ready

[00:22:03] [SPEAKER_00]: Just me if she can join my gym and if I can teach her some resistance training exercises

[00:22:08] [SPEAKER_00]: The therapist told her it'd be good for her to work out

[00:22:12] [SPEAKER_00]: So we started going to the gym three to four times a week in the evening before picking my son from daycare

[00:22:17] [SPEAKER_00]: It's nice to have a regular gym partner and someone to geek out about the daily protein intake

[00:22:22] [SPEAKER_00]: We also told her when we were cooking that she is so much less annoying than my sister in

[00:22:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Lawson but was she was my sister in law? She just smiled at that comment

[00:22:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna had already had a few interviews and also contacted her old job who seemed interested in hiring her back

[00:22:38] [SPEAKER_00]: She told us two weeks ago that she'd be looking for apartments

[00:22:41] [SPEAKER_00]: We already told her apartments in our suburb and hopefully should finalize her soon

[00:22:46] [SPEAKER_00]: My wife jokingly told her that her dating prospects are going to be bleak if she stays in our suburb

[00:22:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Anna told us she's going to stay away from relationships at least for a while now

[00:22:56] [SPEAKER_00]: And work on herself

[00:22:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Bush enjoys our gym and loves spending time with our son

[00:23:01] [SPEAKER_00]: About the hugging and kissing I think I've decoded it

[00:23:05] [SPEAKER_00]: Hug from Anna is normal and I get one every morning however

[00:23:08] [SPEAKER_00]: I think she kisses people on the cheeks as a way to say thank you

[00:23:12] [SPEAKER_00]: Things are really looking positive for Anna and we're really happy that she's able to get through a bad patch in her life

[00:23:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Should I slay to this out from everyone after the incident seven months ago?

[00:23:22] [SPEAKER_00]: However, she plans to join my wife and son when I sum her trip to my in laws in a few weeks

[00:23:27] [SPEAKER_00]: But let's say we're at any updates on the employment front

[00:23:29] [SPEAKER_00]: I just hope the best for her and I'm glad I did not make a big deal out of the situation

[00:23:35] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm also glad to have such a kind in understanding wife who is there for her friend in need

[00:23:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Come on man

[00:23:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe this is just reddit brain coming out but it went from like walking in accidentally topless too

[00:23:49] [SPEAKER_00]: Hugging a kiss on the cheek to hugging every day waking up at 5 a.m. the same time as you get up to having coffee and nice chats together

[00:23:56] [SPEAKER_00]: Joining your gym

[00:23:58] [SPEAKER_00]: It can't be just me with a red flags right here right picking up the kid from school

[00:24:03] [SPEAKER_00]: And it's a we already sold to apartments. I mean what is this dude just got us headed in the clouds or what

[00:24:10] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, what do you guys make of this situation?

[00:24:16] [SPEAKER_00]: Someone said the more they read it remind them of the movie the hand that rocks the cradle

[00:24:21] [SPEAKER_00]: I always remember watching that film with my mom when I was younger than what the fuck

[00:24:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Anyway now I'm gonna turn this one to you guys what do you guys make of this situation?

[00:24:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. I'll see you in the next one

[00:24:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Much love guys