I'm The Kid Of One Of Those Travelling RV Families On Social Media And I Hate Them r/Relationships

[00:00:01] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit Stories. And if you do love a Reddit Story, why not consider hitting that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now today's first story comes from EducationalArmy915 and it says,

[00:00:23] I'm the kid of one of those travelling RV families online and I hate them for it every day. My parents decided when I was only around 7 years old, far too young to get an opinion on anything, to pack us up and move into an RV to travel around the US. My dad works online and my mum makes content online. She's not huge by any means but big enough that we get recognised sometimes and big enough that I've had a camera shoved in my face for as long as I can remember.

[00:00:54] For my privacy sake, I won't say anything else on that and I'm using a throwaway account because I've gotten enough attention already and I'm sick of it. I sleep in a tiny bunk bed that I outgrew years ago. And the other bunk is the only space I have to put anything I own. I don't even have a room, just a curtain. And thank God I'm an only child or else I would have to share the small space I have already. I was homeschooled for most of my education and then switched to online school at my own insistence for high school.

[00:01:24] I'm an 18 year old girl. I didn't have a single friend in person because the longest I've ever stayed anywhere is a month. I didn't have a job and no way to get one because of not being stationary unless I find one online, which also means I have no way to move out and get away from them. I've had conversations with them about all of this countless times and they are so delusional and genuinely believe that a nomadic existence is the best way to live. So why would I ever need anything else?

[00:01:53] I hate them for treating me like some pet they can just drag along in their plans rather than their child. I hate traveling. I don't like heat. I hate dealing with bugs and I'm so sick of hiking.

[00:02:06] I can't wait for the day that I finally figure out a way to get away from them with their morning hikes and cameras in my face. I've traveled around the US, but yeah, God forbid I want to have a normal life, go to college or maybe even make some friends. That's asking too much.

[00:02:24] So OP followed it up with an update around 10 days later, which said, hello, barely over a week ago. I made a post talking about my very negative experience living in an RV with my parents for around 10 years now. Despite it being such a short time since I've posted, a lot has changed for me since then. I don't know how many people here will be interested in an update on my situation, but I know quite a few people were very concerned and will probably appreciate an update. So here it is.

[00:02:52] Also fair warning, this is a fairly lengthy post. I have a tendency to ramble, so there is sort of a TLDR at the end. I have a lot of people give me really helpful advice, resources, as well as even offers to try and help personally. Some being questionable admittedly, but a majority being genuinely concerned, wanting to try and help, and I very much appreciate that. It was slightly overwhelming to be honest, and I ended up not responding to a lot of people.

[00:03:19] So you all have to forgive me for that. But even if I didn't respond much, I've been doing research on a lot of the information people gave me. Something that stood out to me was people asking if I had any family I could stay with, to which I had to respond, not that I know of. Because I don't know anyone on my dad's side of the family, and my mom's strictly no contact with her family.

[00:03:40] I did not know they were alive, if they cut her off, if she cut them off, or even any details about them, and my mom had never wanted to talk about it. What information I did have was my mom's maiden name, which is pretty uncommon, and where she was born. Which, in terms of trying to find family, can actually get you surprisingly far, I've come to realize. I've always had a slight hatred for the internet, because I never had any choice in my life being public knowledge.

[00:04:08] And I know that once something is out there, it's out there. But for the first time, I'm actually really grateful for the internet. I was able to find some information on my mother's side of the family, and specifically was able to find my grandma's Facebook account. Though it did take some effort. After a lot of stressing on how to approach messaging her, if I even should, as well as potential outcomes, I messaged her explaining my mom's life, who I was, and my situation.

[00:04:35] I won't go into details on why my grandma and my mom are no contact, because that is not my story to share. But my grandma was appalled that she has a granddaughter she didn't even know about, and even more so, the way in which her daughter raised me. I found out to have an aunt and uncle, both of which my grandma told them about me and my situation. I've been in pretty much constant contact with all of them since just learning about each other.

[00:04:59] All of them want to help me get out of this living situation with my parents, and luckily, with me being 18 now, it's actually possible. Again, I don't feel entirely comfortable going into details, but I have arrangements to go stay with my aunt, who lives in a big city on the west coast, that had a lot of potential opportunities for me to start college or whatever I see fit, which I do plan on figuring out college, happy to announce.

[00:05:23] My uncle has kids, but my aunt lives on her own and has a spare bedroom, which has no problem letting me stay in for as long as necessary. I have a train ticket scheduled and purchased by my aunt, and enough money to get to the station. I'm talking with my family, still feels weird to type, currently, and trying to plan out the details like how or if I'm going to tell my parents. My mum doesn't know any information on where any of her family lives, so even if I were to tell my parents who I'm going to live with,

[00:05:52] they wouldn't know where I was specifically. Someone pointed out that if I did leave without telling them, I should leave a note or some form of proof that I left willingly. So if I do opt out of a conversation, I'm planning on either leaving a note or filming a video explaining my plans and why I'm leaving, which would be kind of ironic, wouldn't it? Regarding my mum filming, I've been very quiet around my parents and just refusing to talk when the camera is on, but neither one of them has mentioned it yet so far luckily.

[00:06:20] Also speaking of my mum's content, I would like to very much emphasize something quickly. Almost everyone was genuinely trying to help, but I had a few people replying trying to guess who I was. Luckily, the few I saw were basically torn to shreds and ended up deleting their comments. I also had a few people who messaged me privately trying to make a guess at who I am, which at least is not public I guess, although I can understand being curious. I posted anonymously with very little personal information for a reason.

[00:06:49] As I stated in my previous post, I've gotten enough attention and I'm very much sick of it. I would very much appreciate if you guys could respect that. Even if you think you might know who I am, please, please don't make public guesses and understand that I don't want this to be even more public information tied to my name. Very long story short, I've set plans to leave as well as a safe place to go with my aunt once I do, and I very much appreciate so people for being so willing to help.

[00:07:15] If you had told me not even two weeks ago that not only do I ever plan to move away from my parents, but contact with family members I didn't even know existed, I don't think I would have believed it. I'm currently not planning on making another post updating this, but I wanted to let anyone who was concerned about me to not worry. Genuinely, thank you. And two months later, OP says, Hello, it's been a while and I wanted to check in on here to hopefully give a few people some peace of mind.

[00:07:43] In my last update, I explained that I'd got in contact with my mother's side of the family and had a place to go stay. I can proudly announce that I did it and I'm in a safe space now, totally away from my parents with absolutely zero contact. My aunt is an absolute angel, truly. She's so kind and that's not even including my grandma and uncle. When I first got here, my aunt as well as my grandma took me out on a little shopping spree, bought me clothes, decor and furniture for my room, because I have one of those now.

[00:08:13] And honestly, anything they thought I would need. My uncle has introduced me to my cousins. He has a younger son and daughter who's very close in age to me. And I would say that we've become friends. I've been able to go out and do a lot of fun little things with her. My aunt is currently helping research colleges near us, but has reassured me I can do everything at my own pace. And there really is no rush. But her home will always have a spot for me. My aunt in general is such a cool person.

[00:08:42] She's someone I very quickly have started to look up to and have gotten close to. The more time we spend together, the more we learn that we actually have a lot in common. I'm just so grateful to all of them for being here and being so supportive. My aunt is also really helping me figure out who I am as an individual. For the first time, I'm in charge of my identity, what I share and who I share it with. I dyed and cut my hair, got a nickname and have been exclusively going by it.

[00:09:11] My cousin is currently on a journey to help me learn about what makeup I like. She's also introducing me to her favorite music groups as a self-proclaimed cringe but free K-pop fan. I have an entirely private Instagram account with all of five followers and I plan on keeping it that way. I just feel like a normal teenage girl for once and I've never felt happier. When I look in the mirror or just think about my life in general, I'm actually happy with it.

[00:09:38] I guess I never realized that I wasn't comfortable with my identity as a person because honestly, I have bigger things to worry about. This is more than I could ever have imagined and honestly, I have a hard time even processing it sometimes. I'm officially in therapy though, so maybe I can start working that as well as processing my past and how it plays into my identity in the future. My new therapist is actually the part of the reason I'm making this update. She thinks that posting this could be a good way to get closure to a certain extent

[00:10:07] as a way of sort of acknowledging what I went through but also moving on to my new life because I have my whole future ahead of me and one that I'm very excited to experience. So keeping that in mind, this will be my final update on here. I want to be able to enjoy my life and future while keeping my privacy. A lot of people really wanted me to share my story more, expose my past but at least for now I've decided against that. It's my story and I can choose to share it or not.

[00:10:34] For once I have control who gets to know what information about me and I'm not willing to give that up yet. But I suppose I don't know what the future holds, so I'm asking as nicely as possible that people please respect that. Absolutely appreciate the support and advice so many have given me and just know that I'm safe. I can honestly say that I'm happy. I'm planning out my future, what I want to do with my life and who I am beside just a persona on camera. Just thank you so much for everything and goodbye.

[00:11:06] I'm so glad things have turned out well for OP in the end. You know, most things that us when we were teenagers or if you're a teenager now, take for granted is like sort of completely new to her. And she's getting full control over her own identity. Just small things like picking a nickname, choosing your own hair, your own clothes, having a private social media account, having supportive people around you that's letting you discover yourself at your own pace.

[00:11:34] It wasn't just about escaping a bad situation for OP, but also about finding her own path in life at the same time. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Let's move on to another story. Now our next story comes from AT's wedding dress throwaway and it says, Am I the arsehole for saying I would wear my mum's wedding dress under one condition?

[00:12:02] So this came up during dinner the other night and I'm wondering if what I had requested makes me come across as an arsehole. My mum thinks so, or at least like a bridezilla. When my parents got married back in the 80s, my mum wore a big poofy white gown that was in style at the time. Just like Princess Diana's dress, but with more lace and frills. After the wedding, she had it packed up with the intention of saving it for any future daughters to use. I.e. me.

[00:12:31] It's 2019. We're talking about weddings at the dinner table. Boyfriend has been hinting at it for a while now. When my mum says that when the time comes, she would love to see me wear her old dress. I understand why she would want to see me in it, but I'm not keen on the idea. One of the reasons is because it's just not my taste. And the other is because when you look at the dress, you know it came from the 80s. It is what you imagine the quintessential 80s wedding dress would look like.

[00:13:00] Minus a teased hairstyle and frosted lipstick. It would look anachronistic in a setting with more modern fashions and wedding styles. As if the bride accidentally walked into a time slip and came out of it into 2019. Here's how things went. Opie said, sure, I'll wear it. Mum says, great. And Opie replies to him, but on one condition. That the bridal party and the groomsmen wear clothes based on 80s wedding fashion. With an 80s themed wedding reception to follow.

[00:13:30] I'm a history teacher who loved doing research into different time periods and eras. So, researching wedding trends, music, tech and fashion from the 1980s. And then recreating it would be fun. And I'm not so worried about my boyfriend and friends being opposed to the idea. Because they know how much I love history and historical reenactment. Not to mention some of them partake in it themselves. One used to work at Williamsburg and boyfriend is a civil war reenactor. My mum wasn't big on the idea.

[00:13:59] She thinks that the idea of an 80s themed wedding is stupid. And that I sound like a bridezilla for suggesting that the wedding party go through with the idea. Absolutely not bridezilla-ish at all. And it's your day. You do you. You just be happy with what you want to do. It's as simple as that really, isn't it? But a user says to Opie, not the arsehole. I think that's amazing. Especially if you have a 16 candles-ish first dance. Opie was saying, I was thinking dirty dancing. I love that movie.

[00:14:30] Two Pink Giraffe says not the arsehole. It's your day. You do you. Another option is to take it to a talented seamstress to de-puff the sleeves. Take the bow off the arse, I'm guessing. And see what else can be done to bring the dress into this century. If that's possible. Opie says there is a bow on that arse. And it's a big one too. What happened? Says not the arsehole. That's very kind of you to find a way to compromise. Your mum is the arsehole for making this about her dream of seeing the dress worn by a daughter.

[00:14:59] But the thing is, you're offering that to her. I don't see why this period costume context is problematic either. I would hate to wear my mum's dress for that reason. Not my style. I would not be as generous as you are being. A user says to Opie, not the arsehole. It's entirely your day. Can't tell if you actually want to wear the dress or if you're just doing it for your mum. But you don't even have to do that. And if you do want to wear it, it's on your terms. You could throw a Nordic themed wedding and her opinion wouldn't matter.

[00:15:29] It's your day girl. Don't let nobody tell you how to do it. Opie's saying, I was hoping to do my own dress shopping. But I knew growing up that my mum would like me to wear her dress. I didn't realise she was serious. Plus, I was kind of joking about the 80s themed wedding. But the more I'm reading the replies, the more I want to have it. I kind of felt like reading that first part of the story as well. That the comment was right. That it did feel like Opie was just doing it for their mum.

[00:15:58] And I think if Opie wants to go wedding dress shopping for themselves, which, you know, I think many, many people do, don't they really? Then they should absolutely do that. If you put yourself into the mum's position and, you know, your child came up to you and said, oh, I'd like to go and pick my own dress. You'd go, absolutely. That'd be the right thing to do, right? I'm sure mum got to pick her own dress for her wedding day. So you can't start getting angry because she wants to pick her own dress. But Opie comes in with an update and says,

[00:16:27] hey guys, it's that 80s bride with an update for you. Before we begin, let me just say that it is crazy how my first post blew up. I never expected this response. Thank you guys so much for weighing in with your opinions. A lot has happened since I made that post nearly a month ago. To begin with, no. So boyfriend still hasn't proposed, but that's okay. I know it's going to happen. Some of my friends figured out it was me behind that post. When I mentioned the kerfuffle,

[00:16:58] I love a kerfuffle with my mum. One of them said, you wouldn't happen to be the one with the, am I the asshole post, would you? While we aren't engaged yet, boyfriend and I did talk about what we want our wedding to look like. While we have a couple of ideas in mind, he was on board with the 80s wedding idea and joked that if I was to wear my mum's dress, then he wanted to find a replica of his dad's tuxedo and grow his hair out into a mullet and stash. Guys, here's a keeper.

[00:17:28] If ever there was one. But seriously, 80s weddings is now in our top five list of wedding ideas. And when we brought up the idea with the people we want in our wedding party, they were all enthusiastic for the idea. So it looks like our, that 80s wedding might be a reality now. That leads me to my mum. I sat her down and we got to her dress. And some of you were right. She thought that I would just be using her dress as a prop in a tacky theme wedding.

[00:17:56] Instead of treating it as a treasured possession that it is. We did get to talking about how we could pull it off. I brought over some bridal magazines and pointed out how the dress would look like next to the more modern bridesmaids. I actually did start doing my own research and made a Pinterest board to show her how I envisioned the new 80s wedding to look like. I'm not gonna lie. She was pretty impressed with the amount of research I did into a time period she lived through. The bridezilla comment came from the fact she thought I was going to dictate

[00:18:26] what everyone was going to wear. Turns out she was referring to a few more infamous cases including the bride who wanted orange suede, labutins and soda hats at her beach wedding. Again, had to tell her I already ran that idea with the prospective bridesmaids already and they all loved the idea. The most important update. Actually tried on the dress while over at my parents for Thanksgiving. It actually fits. It's a bit tight in the belly but nothing that cutting out booze and burgers

[00:18:55] for a couple of weeks can't fix. I looked a little overdone in it but I loved it. There is no way I'm going to want to turn it into a new dress now. I want to preserve it. But this is coming from the diehard history buff. While I may go dress shopping as well, the dress is a solid contender to be my future wedding dress. Hope you edit it and said stupid me I forgot to take pics. God dang it. And edit 2 says I'm really sorry guys. This was the closest I could find to something that looked like my mom's dress.

[00:19:24] For starters, her puff sleeves and skirt were more poofy and the latter would definitely be because it looks like she had on a petticoat underneath that day. But here is the closest I could find. And then links a pic. Yep, and that's very 80s. And then says the hem of her skirt had some kind of frilly detail as well. And here is approximately what the back most resembles. And she has another pic. Yeah, it's got that big ass bow on it and like a big train as well for you podcast users.

[00:19:53] Again, I'm really sorry guys. Kids, take notes. Always have photographic evidence because you never know when you're going to need it. And I just want to read out Lady Norbert's comment on this one as well because it's so true. They just said, oh my gosh, it's Barbara's wedding dress from Beetlejuice. The one they use for the exorcism. It is. I watched Beetlejuice again a couple of weeks back. And it's the first time I've seen it since I was a kid. And that is some trippy shit, isn't it? It's good though.

[00:20:24] And I think all's well, that ends well. I'm glad that they were able to talk about it, resolve their problems without exploding. But what do you guys make of this situation? Have you ever been put in the position where a wedding dress or something similar has been saved for you and they want you to wear it but it's not quite your style, etc? How did you approach that situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Now, just a huge thank you for being here today, getting involved in the stories, your love, your support,

[00:20:53] your time. It always means the absolute world to me. So thank you so, so much. And hopefully, I'll see you in the next one. Take care and much love.