I'm Going To GHOST My Partner After Discovering His 7 AFFAIR PARTNERS r/Relationships

[00:00:03] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you're well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit Stories. And if you do love a Reddit Story, why not consider hitting that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys.

[00:00:22] Now, our first story comes from a variety of subreddits. And it has a warning on it of infidelity, emotional manipulation, mentions of sexual assault, stalking and harassment as well. So if you do want to skip the story please feel free to do so. Timestamps are always down in the description and along the timeline below. And it's titled, Planning To Ghost Him After Finding Out He's Cheating On Me.

[00:00:47] I found out my boyfriend was cheating a few weeks ago. Been spiraling since. Literally only running off of vengeance and pure disgust. Got this weird gut feeling and checked his phone while he was asleep. Those 20 minutes locked in the bathroom felt like years. And the shame keeps me from talking to anyone about it. I moved across the country to be with him. So I'm all alone. No friends or family here.

[00:01:11] He woke up the next morning with kisses and breakfast and has been doing so a lot lately. Probably the guilt. He even bought me flowers for the first time ever. After me hinting at wanting them for years. He thought my quiet crying was out of happiness. He even brought up buying a house for us. Something with enough space for potential future children.

[00:01:33] I'm still going through the motions. I'm still going through the motions. Making his breakfast and protein shake every day. Packing his lunch. Making sure dinner is almost ready when he comes home from the gym.

[00:01:43] What makes me the angriest is that I really, genuinely thought he wouldn't do something like this. He watched his father cheat on his mother and father children out of their marriage. All while she struggled with infertility her entire life.

[00:01:56] My partner isn't her biological son. And never had her own. She dedicated her life to the two of them. And passed away of ovarian cancer shortly before we met.

[00:02:08] Sometimes I think about whether she regretted staying with her husband or not.

[00:02:12] We have a small shrine in her honor and something makes me look at it and expect guidance.

[00:02:17] I love the man she raised and hate the one her husband did. But they are both him. And he's a grown ass man more than capable of self control. So I decided to walk away.

[00:02:27] Next week my car will be picked up and shipped back home. And I got first class tickets for me and my dog on his dime.

[00:02:34] He'll come back home from work and everything I brought will be gone. Along with me.

[00:02:39] The only thing I might regret is not somehow being able to see his reaction when he walks through the door and realize what's going on.

[00:02:46] Law.

[00:02:47] To a commenter says to OP, I'm sorry you're going through this. It's the hardest thing to let go.

[00:02:52] As hopeless as it can feel sometimes, it does get better.

[00:02:56] Take your time in the beginning but I think it's therapeutic to confront him eventually.

[00:03:01] Ghosting doesn't provide closure for you.

[00:03:03] In my experience, confronting the problem head on gave me a sense of closure.

[00:03:07] I tried to take everything that happens as a life lesson.

[00:03:10] Good luck with everything.

[00:03:12] OP says, I personally don't believe in closure.

[00:03:15] I got all that I needed when I realized he was untrustworthy.

[00:03:21] Odd1 says, do you have access to his phone and computer?

[00:03:24] Install a keylogger and you can not only see what he's saying to you but to the other affair partners as well.

[00:03:30] I put a keylogger on my ex's phone and computer when I caught him cheating.

[00:03:33] He was such a dumbass and seeing the shit he was saying, the lies he was spewing made me grateful I dropped his ass.

[00:03:42] OP says, everything from his name, age, college degree, occupation, city height and dick size.

[00:03:47] He even told one he was married and his wife was pregnant with twins.

[00:03:51] I almost had a heart attack thinking I was an affair partner too and he had a family out there somewhere.

[00:03:57] OP says, if he can go after you, you should probably leave a note or a sign that you're leaving him because of his cheating.

[00:04:03] Seeing that you up and left without a known reason, from his point of view, might push him to follow you home.

[00:04:09] If he knows the reason and knows that he has no chance in hell in getting you back, it might delay a possible confrontation.

[00:04:16] OP says, you are right.

[00:04:17] I've been considering just leaving a sticky note with a list of all the different girls' names and the apartment key beside it.

[00:04:23] Simple and effective.

[00:04:25] Suspicious Bear says, fuck, multiple girls.

[00:04:29] Draw a little middle finger beside them while you're at it and make sure there are little to no supplies.

[00:04:34] Two toiletries cleaning stuff left and leave the house dirty so that you can appreciate how much you did for the arsehole.

[00:04:42] OP says seven of them to be precise.

[00:04:44] I'll have to rush and get out with a certain time frame but I might just settle for shrimp in the curtain rods.

[00:04:50] He's really sensitive to smells, lol.

[00:04:54] Seven people he's having an affair with.

[00:04:56] I know this isn't the point of, you know, an infidelity story and I am incredibly sorry that OP's having to find that out that everything has been a fucking lie.

[00:05:06] Must be absolutely devastating.

[00:05:08] But seven people?

[00:05:10] Who the hell's got time for that shit?

[00:05:12] Do they actually get off on the excitement of it just being an affair?

[00:05:15] Because it just sounds terrifying.

[00:05:18] It must be like constantly living on the edge of possibly getting caught between seven people.

[00:05:24] Trying to remember what you told each of these seven people as well as living your everyday life, your job.

[00:05:29] Just, oh my word, it's just exhausting.

[00:05:33] OP came in with another post that said,

[00:05:35] I lied to my boyfriend every day and saved the money he gave me.

[00:05:40] Almost every day my boyfriend sends me money for lunch, gas, something.

[00:05:44] I thought he was just really kind.

[00:05:46] Turns out he was cheating and giving me cash made him feel less guilty.

[00:05:50] As though he didn't beg me to move across the country with him where I know no one.

[00:05:54] Once I found out, I wanted to immediately confront him but was scared of the outcome since the apartment was only in his name.

[00:06:01] And again, I know no one here.

[00:06:04] Now I just save every dime of what he sends to be able to pay for the $3,000 moving fees to go back home without hurting my own pocket too much.

[00:06:12] Breaking my heart, destroying my ability to trust and scaring me off from men I can handle.

[00:06:17] But messing with my finances?

[00:06:20] Nah, never.

[00:06:21] The transport company is coming next Wednesday to take my car.

[00:06:24] My plane tickets for me and my dog have been bought.

[00:06:27] Gonna keep up my happy act and do the usual cooking of dinner and scrub in his bag.

[00:06:32] And poof, on Wednesday, like I never knew him.

[00:06:35] It's the only form of revenge I could do that wouldn't haunt me.

[00:06:39] Good riddance.

[00:06:40] Edit.

[00:06:41] A few of us the details.

[00:06:42] There's seven plus other women.

[00:06:44] Everything he's told them was a lie.

[00:06:46] Name, age, height, city, occupation.

[00:06:48] All of it.

[00:06:49] The only common denominator was that he bought all of us the exact same lingerie set for his birthday in January.

[00:06:56] And specifically requested I hang it up on our closet where it's viewable.

[00:07:00] Forgiveness is not on the table.

[00:07:02] He'd be surprised but I doubt he'll be hurt.

[00:07:05] Pure Jones said to Opie, I look forward to it.

[00:07:07] How did you find out if it's not too personal?

[00:07:09] Which Opie said woke up randomly in the middle of the night and he's up to no good was all I could think about.

[00:07:15] I sleep like a literal baby and never ever wake up like that.

[00:07:18] Took his phone and locked myself in the bathroom while he was asleep and found it all.

[00:07:23] Opie's next post said,

[00:07:25] Friendship breakups are so much worse than relationship breakups.

[00:07:28] And says,

[00:07:30] I'd be single again pretty soon and I'm looking forward to it but also not.

[00:07:34] Like yay, I finally can cook when and how I want to and don't have to split chores and can do everything on my own way.

[00:07:40] But that's the only good part.

[00:07:42] I've been on my own since I was 16 and I've turned out mostly fine.

[00:07:46] I've a paid off house, car, cute dog, debt free and I'm finishing up my master's degree at 25.

[00:07:52] It could be worse.

[00:07:54] But I am lonely.

[00:07:56] I'm not on speaking terms with my family and had a huge fallout with my lifelong friends a couple of years ago.

[00:08:02] I haven't tried making friends since because part of me hopes one day I can find a way to fix that friendship.

[00:08:08] Plus I'm moving around so much that making friends is pointless.

[00:08:11] I'm not good at long distance anything.

[00:08:14] I've never prided myself on romantic relationships.

[00:08:17] Sure, they're cool but loving a group of women was always where I found the most peace and understanding.

[00:08:22] And that's what I want the most.

[00:08:24] I guess I'm just going through things right now and I really wish I had people I trust to talk to.

[00:08:29] Friend breakups hurt the most.

[00:08:32] Someone asked the OP how they had their own house at such a young age.

[00:08:35] OP said neither.

[00:08:36] I lived with my friends and their parents until college started.

[00:08:39] Already had a scholarship.

[00:08:40] Just worked three jobs until I was 22 and lived frugally.

[00:08:44] Doofus Broth says the maths for the time and money aren't working out on this end.

[00:08:48] But there is also a lot of variable slash info that is missing.

[00:08:52] It took me seven years to pay off my house and I was contributing it like it was an emergency.

[00:08:57] Qualifying for a home and paying it off in the amount of time without help seems nearly impossible.

[00:09:02] I'm so curious about the formula here.

[00:09:05] I need a lesson in finance from OP.

[00:09:07] When I broke it down on it, it just doesn't seem possible except from a financial windfall

[00:09:11] counting even a frugal cost of living along with accounting for taxes paid etc.

[00:09:16] And that did not include the cost for transportation, medical, groceries, blah blah blah.

[00:09:23] OP came in and said the house was a 70k foreclosure and is a four bed, four bath.

[00:09:28] It was a golf caddy, gentleman's club bartender, an occasional hostess and notary signing agent.

[00:09:34] Along with selling stationary items on Etsy.

[00:09:36] Also my scholarships paid for quite a bit of my home in general.

[00:09:40] It never specified what kind of housing for them.

[00:09:42] Just housing.

[00:09:42] I lived in one room and rented out the other three.

[00:09:46] Doofus Broth replied saying,

[00:09:48] That's the info I was looking for.

[00:09:50] Thank you.

[00:09:50] That's very smart.

[00:09:51] Good going.

[00:09:52] Good luck with your situation.

[00:09:54] So interested in how he reacts to your departure.

[00:09:57] OP comes in with her next post which says,

[00:09:59] My current relationship has made me realize the thin line between love and hate.

[00:10:04] I found out my boyfriend of almost four years was cheating.

[00:10:08] We lived together for two years and I'm leaving him tomorrow.

[00:10:11] He just doesn't know yet.

[00:10:12] And won't until after I'm gone.

[00:10:15] As mad as I am, as betrayed as I feel, I still love him.

[00:10:18] All I really want is to wake up tomorrow and this all be a nightmare.

[00:10:22] I don't enjoy this slice of reality.

[00:10:24] But the person I love the most has looked me in the eye and lied to me for who knows how long.

[00:10:29] And every time I do it, I'm left wondering how many times he did it.

[00:10:33] How many times did he whine, dine and fuck other women and come home to me?

[00:10:37] How many times have I been the stupid girlfriend who trusted her boyfriend blindly?

[00:10:42] How many times have I been some woman's laughing stock?

[00:10:46] Did he fuck us back to back?

[00:10:47] Did his friends know?

[00:10:49] Did they look me in the fucking eye and really not say anything?

[00:10:52] Did he love them?

[00:10:53] How many times did he tell me he loved me and meant it?

[00:10:56] When did he stop meaning it?

[00:10:57] Did he ever mean it the first time?

[00:11:00] I'm not a master manipulator unlike him.

[00:11:02] I'm just composed because I've never had any other choice.

[00:11:07] Emotions got you beat or worse when it came to my parents and

[00:11:10] I'm more than aware I have a shitload of trauma to unpack.

[00:11:13] But I can't.

[00:11:15] Not in the self-pity, woe is me, it's too hard, but no.

[00:11:19] I probably just can't.

[00:11:21] Therapists here are wildly westernized and

[00:11:23] once I start with the short list, they'll probably just charge me double.

[00:11:27] Maybe triple.

[00:11:28] And the last time I tried, he kept trying to convince me.

[00:11:31] I enjoyed my own assault.

[00:11:34] Maybe I got cheated on because I'm emotionally inept.

[00:11:37] My intimacy levels are quite limited.

[00:11:39] The few times he asked about my childhood, I either A, brushed him off or B,

[00:11:43] he told him one thing I thought wasn't that bad and

[00:11:46] he looked so shocked I held out on the actual bad parts.

[00:11:49] And that's where the hate comes in.

[00:11:51] He knows what it's like to grow up feeling unwanted.

[00:11:54] He knows what it's like to lose your parents young.

[00:11:57] He knows what it's like to feel your entire life has been horrible event after horrible event.

[00:12:01] But he still did this to me and I don't know how he could.

[00:12:05] I could never cheat on anyone, let alone someone who shared such personal things with me.

[00:12:09] I haven't so much as made eye contact with another man since we met.

[00:12:14] Other people were just other people and we were us.

[00:12:17] I don't know.

[00:12:18] I just don't see being able to date again.

[00:12:21] Had deep-seated trust issues long before this and growing old by myself with 30 cats genuinely sounds nice.

[00:12:28] Hell, great even.

[00:12:30] At least I won't always be wondering when the betrayal will come.

[00:12:33] Opie updated again saying leaving partner of four years after finding out he was cheating.

[00:12:38] And Opie said,

[00:12:39] Transport company came and picked up my car.

[00:12:41] Sold whatever big furniture I brought for low prices.

[00:12:44] Took his dog to the park and played with him for a bit.

[00:12:47] Got him a dog cupcake and took him back to the apartment.

[00:12:50] Movers started coming for the rest of my stuff and I hadn't prepared for our property manager thinking we were both moving out.

[00:12:57] And we hadn't given them the required vacancy notice.

[00:13:00] She came to talk to me right as my Uber was coming and I told her what was going on.

[00:13:05] Unfortunately, they had already called him because only his name is on the lease.

[00:13:09] He's called and texted me a few times but I haven't replied.

[00:13:12] His workday won't be over for a couple more hours.

[00:13:15] I left my apartment keys and anything he's ever bought for me that I hadn't sold already.

[00:13:20] Didn't feel like taking that stuff with me.

[00:13:22] While packing, I remembered we bought a pet camera that shoots treats on the entertainment center and turned it back on.

[00:13:28] I promised myself I'd disconnect from it by midnight tomorrow.

[00:13:31] But I have my own predictions about how he'll react and I just gotta know for sure.

[00:13:36] Yeah, it's fucked up.

[00:13:38] Sue me.

[00:13:39] I actually forgot to leave a note and was running out of time before my Uber came and just left the lingerie set he was so obsessed with on the bed.

[00:13:46] He'll figure it out eventually.

[00:13:48] Or not.

[00:13:49] I'm at the airport now with my dog and just waiting on my flight.

[00:13:53] I wish I could say that I feel free but I don't.

[00:13:56] Just tired.

[00:13:57] Thank you all for the well wishes and thank you more to all of the women who reached out with similar stories.

[00:14:02] I think I might have caved and stayed if you all hadn't.

[00:14:06] Suspicious Bear said to OP,

[00:14:12] OP said just that he got a call from property management and asked if I ordered something big and if anything was going on.

[00:14:18] OP said pet cam update.

[00:14:21] Update, I turned it on for about 10 minutes after I got back to my home and unpacked.

[00:14:26] He wasn't there but everything was a mess.

[00:14:28] There was a hole in the wall, furniture flipped over, papers everywhere.

[00:14:32] The kitchen looked like a tornado went through it.

[00:14:35] I deleted all my other social media accounts but didn't block his number.

[00:14:39] The first two days he called me over 200 times.

[00:14:42] Lots of novel ass text messages and him admitting to some shit I didn't even know about yet.

[00:14:47] Quite a few calls from his dad and friends too.

[00:14:50] I didn't reply to any of them.

[00:14:52] When the dad and friends are phoning I always wonder what they've actually been told about this situation.

[00:14:58] Because I'm damn sure he didn't tell his friends and his dad,

[00:15:02] I've been having an affair with seven other people.

[00:15:04] There may have been the chance that they were phoning up to talk to OP to show some empathy towards them.

[00:15:11] Likely not though.

[00:15:12] But OP came in with their last update and says,

[00:15:16] Even though I've seen messages asking about an update,

[00:15:19] I didn't think anyone actually wanted one.

[00:15:21] Life just came full circle and I saw my post on TikTok.

[00:15:25] For you, literally Paige.

[00:15:27] Just a few things.

[00:15:28] I mentioned in a comment that I think his dad was the reason his mum passed.

[00:15:32] Not in a straight up killer way but the,

[00:15:35] I cheated so much and gave my wife an STD that led to her getting HPV.

[00:15:40] And since I didn't allow her to get medical treatment,

[00:15:42] she ended up infertile with cervical cancer.

[00:15:45] I misspoke and said ovarian and died way.

[00:15:49] Of course, no one will ever know that for sure but I doubt it helped any.

[00:15:53] My ex had always claimed he did not respect his father.

[00:15:56] He is their bio nephew, not son.

[00:15:59] As a man due to it.

[00:16:01] When I found out he was cheating, forgiving him was never an option

[00:16:04] because I have no interest in following in his mum's footsteps.

[00:16:07] I did not have any signs.

[00:16:10] Besides, a few months in, he locked down his social media

[00:16:12] because he didn't want to get passed up on a promotion due to politics.

[00:16:16] I did ghost everyone we mutually knew for a month or two

[00:16:20] until I figured out who I could and couldn't trust

[00:16:22] to not just tell him my new socials, phone number and address.

[00:16:26] I never blocked his number but I never replied to any texts or calls.

[00:16:30] He eventually died out two or so months later.

[00:16:33] I ended up finding out anyway and I moved again.

[00:16:36] Out of state this time.

[00:16:37] At the last place he showed up at 7am

[00:16:39] and I saw him on my ring doorbell looking around

[00:16:42] and showing my photo to people.

[00:16:44] One of my dumb ass neighbours confirmed I live there.

[00:16:47] Down to my dog's name.

[00:16:49] They kept coming every day after that.

[00:16:51] I kept finding letters addressed to me that were obviously from him.

[00:16:54] They said a lot of things I didn't know

[00:16:56] but nothing that could ever make me move past what he did.

[00:16:59] I moved before I ever saw him face to face.

[00:17:02] A few of his friends reached out after my second move

[00:17:05] telling me about some erratic behaviour of his going on

[00:17:08] but I ignored them too.

[00:17:10] Not my man.

[00:17:11] Not my problem.

[00:17:12] I've been asked on some dates but no thanks.

[00:17:15] I'm too fragile and trusting for the fucked up morals

[00:17:18] of some of these men have.

[00:17:20] There's nothing about being in a relationship I miss.

[00:17:22] I know I'm probably supposed to say

[00:17:24] that I hope he gets the help he needs and finds happiness

[00:17:27] but I don't.

[00:17:29] I'll have lifelong trauma from what he did

[00:17:31] so at the least he can have lifelong regrets.

[00:17:35] Most importantly I found a great group of women

[00:17:37] that feel like family and always are there for me.

[00:17:40] I'm happier than I've been in years.

[00:17:42] I'm just thankful I got out before I got pregnant or married

[00:17:45] and was tied to him forever.

[00:17:47] I forget he exists most days now

[00:17:49] and didn't even think it was possible.

[00:17:51] I hope this suffices.

[00:17:53] Thank you redditors.

[00:17:55] Edit.

[00:17:55] I did get tested again and did test positive for Trich

[00:17:59] which I did not know existed beforehand.

[00:18:02] All cleared up now though.

[00:18:03] I never did reach out to the other women

[00:18:05] mostly because they used our relationship to bond.

[00:18:08] They all knew he had a girlfriend

[00:18:10] and some he lied and said we were married.

[00:18:13] Three of the other women were in committed relationships as well.

[00:18:16] To whoever social media I could find

[00:18:18] I did message their boyfriends and husbands.

[00:18:20] And I gotta say fair play to Opie after all that

[00:18:23] you know just removing him from her life

[00:18:26] although he's clearly trying

[00:18:28] but Opie just focusing on themselves.

[00:18:31] Meeting up with a great group of women

[00:18:33] that they said that's like family to them

[00:18:35] and you know getting some happiness from that

[00:18:38] which is just wonderful.

[00:18:39] And also just reaching out to the boyfriends and husbands

[00:18:43] who were also affected by the behavior of these affair partners.

[00:18:47] Opie didn't have to do that

[00:18:48] but they went out of their way to do it anyway

[00:18:51] because they've been in that exact same position.

[00:18:53] So all I can say is fair play to you Opie

[00:18:56] and I really hope things continue to be

[00:18:58] the best they possibly can be at the moment.

[00:19:01] It sounds like things are going well for you

[00:19:02] but now I'm gonna turn this one to you guys.

[00:19:06] What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:19:09] Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:19:13] I've got to just say one more thing.

[00:19:15] I found it real creepy that he seemed to have a photo

[00:19:18] and was walking around a neighborhood

[00:19:19] asking people if you've seen this person.

[00:19:22] Real stalkery vibes right there.

[00:19:24] But let us know your thoughts down in the comments below

[00:19:27] and don't forget at the very end of the video

[00:19:28] there'll be a couple of playlists there

[00:19:30] that you can click on

[00:19:30] and we'll automatically scroll through all the videos for you.

[00:19:33] So for whatever you're up to

[00:19:35] maybe you're doing a bit of art today

[00:19:36] I had good old silver yesterday over on X

[00:19:39] send me some pictures of them making grape concentrate juice

[00:19:43] which is awesome.

[00:19:44] I just love to see the things you guys are doing

[00:19:47] whilst you're listening in.

[00:19:48] Thank you so so much

[00:19:49] and hopefully I will see you in the next one.

[00:19:52] Take care and much love.