I Spotted My Sisters Husband With Another Woman And Told her r/Relationships

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[00:00:30] Hey, what's up, I'm Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories. If you do love a Reddit story, why not consider it? And I like to subscribe. Maybe that notification bell too. Let's crack on with today's first story, which comes from the Amideasel here, subreddit from Financial Olive 1586 and says,

[00:00:57] I'm I the asshole for telling my sister that her husband is having an affair. I, 17 female have a sister 25 female married to James 38 male. This happened about a week ago. I was with my friend and we were having lunch in a restaurant. There we saw James with another woman. Normally I thought this was his friend but she was being very clingy. It looked like they were on a date. The woman was whispering something in his ears.

[00:01:27] I felt disgusted. I wanted to confront him there, but my friend said to lay low and start recording so that we can have proof. We recorded everything. After leaving the restaurant, I went straight to my sister's place. I sat her down and showed her the video. Instead of crying, she was angry and started accusing me of ruining her marriage. She screamed profanities at me and said that I'm jealous of her.

[00:01:51] It's not true. I always wanted what's best for her. I tried to explain my side and she kicked me out. I noticed that she blocked me everywhere. Yesterday, my mom came into me and asked what did I do? My sister was pissed off and told my mom that I was trying to break up her marriage. I told mom everything. She was disappointed and said she will talk to her. I haven't heard from her or James.

[00:02:15] My mom told me to not contact her now. My dad doesn't know anything. I just don't know what I did wrong. I was only looking out for her. I was trying to be a good sister.

[00:02:27] So in the comments, happy and love says people tend not to be rational about who they take their anger out on. It doesn't mean you did anything wrong. It's even a phrase for this. Shooting the messenger.

[00:02:40] Comment to reply that saying sounds like the sister was already suspecting or knew something but decided not to act on it to save the marriage. When OP showed the video that was directly against that goal, you're trying to ruin my marriage. Equals your evidence makes my desperate effort to save marriage more difficult.

[00:02:57] Raggedy Ann replies that saying yes, not to mention the fact that now it's in the open with video evidence. It's much harder to ignore.

[00:03:06] OP sister might have been willing to let it slide as long as no one else in her circle knew about it. Now thinks her circle is going to pressurize and evorse him, and she's going to look like a fool if she doesn't.

[00:03:17] I haven't seen the video but I'm not sure that whispering something in Inesia qualifies this cheating either.

[00:03:24] This is not me 15 says you did absolutely nothing wrong. You did exactly what you should have done. Sometimes people just react reflexively when they're in pain and blame the easiest and nearest person.

[00:03:35] This is obviously going to be incredibly painful for her. She's in denial and flailing around for anyone else to blame so she doesn't have to face the agony of her marriage collapsing.

[00:03:45] Obvious her claims about you were your motivations are ridiculous. Just give us some space, don't hold what she said against her. Be ready to offer your support again when she needs you and all comes to her senses. Hopefully she jettisoned the asshole.

[00:04:01] And one more from Tatoo says she's displacing anger. She's furious at him but doesn't want to confront him. Perhaps she knows about his indiscretions and can't stop him. But you definitely did the right thing.

[00:04:13] I once told a friend the minute I found her husband was cheating on her literally while she was having brain surgery. She was shocked but thanked me. Both of us dumped the friends who admitted they knew but didn't tell up.

[00:04:26] So, Opie comes back into the post in updates and says thank you all for the comments and support. And those of you who suggested that I should have sent her that video anonymously. I don't think so. I mean she is my sister. I can expect her to believe me. Anyways.

[00:04:41] Yesterday my sister came to our house with her bags. She had left James. I was in my room but was eavesdropping. My mother was consoling her while she cried. As far as I know she will be divorcing James.

[00:04:53] Then she came into my room and apologized. She said that she already had suspicions when James was hiding his phone a lot but my proof has made her suspicions come true. She reacted badly. She wanted it to be false.

[00:05:06] Because she fought the entire world to be with him. Really. That guy says.

[00:05:11] She even fought dad and dad was right about him. Dad warned her that he is manipulative and she is way too young to be married to him. She was 20. They were thinking about having children. I'm glad she left him. We talked for hours. This was the first time in five years we talked and spent time like this.

[00:05:30] I always felt that she dissonse herself from us and moreover. I'm glad dad didn't slap the I told you so on her face.

[00:05:37] It was extremely supportive of her decision to leave and never spoke about their fights they had before she got married. I'm really happy. I got my sister back.

[00:05:46] G&I had a sleep over. Talk shit about James and cried a lot. I'm not mad at her anymore. I knew what she did was wrong but I get where she was coming from.

[00:05:56] Yes, dad didn't know about it. Mum told him to minute my sister call. I guess I was wrong about that. In fact it was dad who went to her house to help pack her things.

[00:06:06] Opie is a pretty amazing sister in this. A lot of empathy for her own sister and the family in general supporting her through this as well.

[00:06:17] They understood that the sister wasn't acting rationally in that situation especially when her life has just been turned upside down.

[00:06:24] But how would you react in this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below and let's move on to another story.

[00:06:33] Now, Unexory does have an update as well from the MIA so here subreddit and says, am I the ASL here for still not forgiving my brother? The sleeping with my girlfriend.

[00:06:45] I 26 male recently went to a family gathering for my dad's 49th birthday. Before I get into that you need to know the backstory with me and my brother 23 male. This event happened around 3 years ago.

[00:06:58] Back then I was dating this girl that I will call Cara 25 female. Cara and I were high school sweethearts. She was my everything at the time and I thought I was hers.

[00:07:09] It was around Thanksgiving time when I found out. I was shopping for desserts for Thanksgiving after staying at a friend's house since I was helping them move.

[00:07:17] I came home and couldn't find Cara or her stuff. I tried calling her but it went straight to voicemail. I tried her location but it looked like she turned it off.

[00:07:27] I checked my front door cam and I saw my brother helping her move her things into his car and leaving with her. I then tried to call my brother but he wouldn't answer either.

[00:07:37] At this point I started to freak out and assume the worst but then I thought my brother would never do that to me.

[00:07:43] It was honestly like my best friend when we were kids and even though we drifted apart kind of when I went to college I still considered as best friends since we talking go out from time to time.

[00:07:55] I then called my dad and had my dad tell my mom to call my brother and to put it on speaker mode.

[00:08:00] My brother answered and when my mom asked him where but Cara was he said she's living with me now she broke up with OP.

[00:08:08] I felt numb in those words. I thought this was some kind of type of sick joke so I checked this Facebook and Instagram and saw them holding each other and kissing and I broke down.

[00:08:20] I was Cara doing this to me. It was going through my head all night but then I was angry.

[00:08:27] How could my own brother, my best friend do this to me?

[00:08:31] I drove up to his house and banged on his door yelling at him to open up but Cara was the one that opened the door.

[00:08:38] I wish I could say that I held it together but I turned into a crying mess once I saw her.

[00:08:43] Then my brother came from his kitchen until Cara to go upstairs.

[00:08:47] That's when he told me that they were having an affair ever since my second year of college and I apologise to him for it.

[00:08:54] But then Cara just came back from the stairs and said that the whole reason why she left me was because of she was sick of pretending to love me.

[00:09:03] I looked at her and realised that wasn't the person I fell in love with. That was someone else.

[00:09:09] I then wondered if this was still worth it. I then realised that it wasn't and walked out.

[00:09:14] I tried not to be a problematic person and make a scene when I know what I do won't change the outcome of the situation.

[00:09:21] Don't get me wrong, I must be on mad at her and my brother and so cut them out of my life from the spot.

[00:09:28] Now back to the family gathering. I live in California now and still single.

[00:09:33] The family gathering was alright until my brother and his wife walked in with a stroller.

[00:09:38] Apparently they got married and got busy. I really don't care anymore.

[00:09:42] I've been through enough therapy to know I'm not the problem. She is.

[00:09:47] My brother was trying to strike up a conversation with me but I ignored him and went back to the conversation I was having with one of my aunts.

[00:09:54] After a couple of hours I forgot they were even there.

[00:09:57] But when I was heading to the basement to get some more ice cream my brother followed me and nearly gave me a heart attack.

[00:10:04] He then awkwardly tried to apologise for what he did to me three years ago and I walked past him.

[00:10:09] He didn't approach me again that night but the next day I got a multiple text from my mum telling me just to ignore my brother already.

[00:10:16] My mum and dad are heavy on the religious side and I would already forgiven my brother but I can't.

[00:10:22] He's the entire reason why I've trust issues now.

[00:10:25] He knew how much he meant to me and still did what he did and expected me to just be okay with it.

[00:10:30] But I don't think I'll forgive him ever in life.

[00:10:33] I'm either the asshole here.

[00:10:35] First commenter says on this one not the asshole you don't have a brother who has a snake.

[00:10:40] Donnie Peters has exactly cut them off completely I would say.

[00:10:45] Opie has no family. I hope you have some very good friends in California which will be his new family and a nice girl with eight kids in the future.

[00:10:53] And guess what mum and dad don't get to meet them.

[00:10:56] Will your brother get back at him and place an ad which says gang bang at place on date and time.

[00:11:02] Be there soldiers. Winterfront says nope don't forgive him he doesn't deserve it.

[00:11:09] He was banging your girl from behind your back and let you find out by moving her out.

[00:11:13] Coward and a scumbag.

[00:11:15] Tell your mum to inform your brother that the next family gathering needs a stick to his gang and not talk to you.

[00:11:20] Let he does but I have no issue humiliating him.

[00:11:23] He is no longer your brother and I'll tell your parents if they try to push this they will lose you completely.

[00:11:29] Educational ad reply says yep this.

[00:11:33] Mum dad your other son conspired with a girl pretending to love me and having a affair.

[00:11:38] Which culminated in me finding out because they both ghosted me and moved her into his place.

[00:11:43] I do not have a brother I never will there is nothing you can ever do to earn a single word from me but you have a choice.

[00:11:51] You can accept that what your other son did is inexcusable and behave reasonably based on that truth.

[00:11:57] Such as not ever mentioning him to me again or you can continue trying to pressure me to forgive him.

[00:12:02] At which point you will never hear another word from me again either.

[00:12:05] Absolutely not the arse all in this situation for not forgiving him I don't blame you one single little bit what they did was just incredibly cruel.

[00:12:16] And few moments dad say oh we forgiven him so why aren't you kind of thing just takes the piss.

[00:12:21] It seems to be easy for them to forgive because they weren't the ones that was wronged in this situation.

[00:12:26] You're the one who's gone through with this one through the pain of a family member deceiving you in that such a cruel way.

[00:12:32] Absolutely not the arse all at all.

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[00:13:50] So OB does come in with an update and says first off before I start with the update.

[00:13:54] I just want to thank the people who responded to my post.

[00:13:58] There's some of you were very intent with me getting back at my brother with violence and to cut him off.

[00:14:04] I know your hearts were in the right place.

[00:14:06] I do want to clear some stuff up.

[00:14:08] I wasn't trying to paint my parents as the bad guy in my last post.

[00:14:12] I actually forgave him a couple of years before they even announced Kara was pregnant.

[00:14:16] I also believe that nothing would have came from me beating my brother into a pulp besides me probably going to jail and causing rifts in the family.

[00:14:24] Now with that other way let's get into the update.

[00:14:28] I sat my mum and dad down with my brother in my parents living room and finally told all of them how I felt.

[00:14:34] I told him what my brother did was unforgivable.

[00:14:37] Not the type of unforgivable that means I'll hate him for the rest of my life but the type of unforgivable that I want utterly nothing to do with him

[00:14:45] because I don't want a relationship with someone who could sleep with a friend's girlfriend behind his back much less his brother.

[00:14:52] That's not the type of person I want to be around.

[00:14:55] My brother tried to make her bustles by saying that he changed.

[00:14:58] He would never do it again.

[00:15:01] Oh dear cheeky bastard.

[00:15:03] He said it like he didn't marry and have a child of the girl I told him I wanted to marry.

[00:15:08] I then asked my parents how they were able to forgive him.

[00:15:11] And they said they were really disappointed in him for a while but then he got saved and started preaching.

[00:15:17] They forgave him since he turned a new leaf.

[00:15:20] I then asked would they still forgive him if they were in the same position as me.

[00:15:24] And they said that they wouldn't forgive him eventually but I don't believe at all.

[00:15:30] Anyway we went back and forth for a while until my brother said that I shouldn't be holding grudges.

[00:15:36] I then told him that he shouldn't be sleeping with other people's girlfriends.

[00:15:40] He then looked at the ground and started to cry.

[00:15:43] My mom said that what I said is too harsh since he already repented for his sins.

[00:15:48] And then gave him the ultimate and most of you told me to do.

[00:15:51] That they could either accept the fact that I want nothing to do with him and move on

[00:15:55] or I'd be cutting them off along with him and his family.

[00:15:58] My dad then said that I would die with regret if I don't forgive my brother.

[00:16:03] But then asked if that was their final answer and my mom said fine.

[00:16:07] She said they will come to terms with me not wanting to be in my brother's life.

[00:16:12] I then asked my dad if that was how he felt too.

[00:16:15] And he said yeah, I didn't thank them for their time.

[00:16:18] Looked at my brother and told him that no matter what he does there is nothing he could do

[00:16:23] that would get me to spend time with him and told him to have a good life.

[00:16:26] I then walked out and drove to get some in and out and went to bed.

[00:16:31] That whole conversation was really mentally and physically draining

[00:16:35] so I basically passed out a couple of seconds after hitting my bed.

[00:16:39] The next day today I decided to download some dating apps

[00:16:42] to try dating again to really move on from this whole situation.

[00:16:47] Julia X comments on this one straight away saying he actually said he never sleep with a girlfriend of yours again.

[00:16:52] How generous of him.

[00:16:54] Slash slack hasn't because this is Reddit.

[00:16:56] When equivalent says, guessing you realize that would mean he's cheating on his wife in that divorce.

[00:17:01] Alimony and child support are expensive.

[00:17:04] Julia X replies saying, well that's going to happen anyway.

[00:17:07] I'm just not sure which of them is going to cheat first.

[00:17:11] Never understand that kind of logic from the brother's point of view

[00:17:15] that you betray someone in such a way.

[00:17:17] I can't understand that in itself anyway, but even after you've done so

[00:17:21] that you think you're going to get some kind of forgiveness from that person

[00:17:24] that they're going to want to talk to you against.

[00:17:26] Have some kind of brotherly relationship after the shit you've just pulled.

[00:17:30] Come on now.

[00:17:32] Anyway, now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:17:35] What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:17:38] Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:17:41] And let's move on to another story.

[00:17:45] Now, our next story comes from the M.I.V.R.S.O.L subreddit from LeoLayer88

[00:17:50] It doesn't have an update as yet but it's titled M.I.V.R.S.O.L for telling my sister-in-law

[00:17:55] She can't use my bridal suite for her kid.

[00:17:58] My female 31 and my fiance male 35 are getting married.

[00:18:04] His brother, male 41 and his bro's wife, female 34 are due to have a baby any day now.

[00:18:10] By the time we get married, the kid will be seven or eight months old.

[00:18:14] We live an hour away from my in-laws, brosist, mother and father.

[00:18:18] Wedding will be four to five hours away for us all.

[00:18:21] Two months prior to telling us they were expecting,

[00:18:24] we had a combo where in very clear terms, they told us,

[00:18:27] children are not in our immediate future.

[00:18:31] At the time they were living with our parents.

[00:18:33] She's an only child and kids switched jobs.

[00:18:36] So you can imagine, we were happy but also confused as well

[00:18:39] from no kids we aren't ready to, we're cooking up a kid.

[00:18:42] We're having a child-free wedding.

[00:18:44] The only exception we've made is to my future nephew.

[00:18:47] My fiance asked his brother to be his best man.

[00:18:50] My sister-in-law is not involved in any part of the day except to be my bro-in-laws plus one.

[00:18:56] Originally my mother-in-law said that she would plan my bridal shower with my mom.

[00:19:01] She casually mentioned to me one day that she didn't have the bandwidth to host my bridal shower

[00:19:06] and she'll be helping with childcare for sister-in-law.

[00:19:09] I don't understand how the two are related but my mom will plan a perfectly fine bridal shower

[00:19:14] without my mother-in-law.

[00:19:16] I pushed my wedding dress shopping date back because my mother-in-law

[00:19:19] didn't want to spend two weekends traveling for dress shopping and a baby shower.

[00:19:24] My fiance expected that his brother would plan a bachelor party.

[00:19:28] Up until recently the plan was to take an international trip but now that he will be a father

[00:19:33] he won't travel far.

[00:19:35] My fiance is not happy about this and has argued some of the domestic destinations they are selecting

[00:19:40] are further than some international places.

[00:19:43] Now that baby is due to be here any day, my brother-in-law is preemptively requested

[00:19:48] that we give them the bridal suite.

[00:19:50] This space onsite at the venue where we can get ready, refresh, relax.

[00:19:54] Access to care for the baby.

[00:19:56] We were both upset.

[00:19:58] I'm okay with having their child at my wedding because I know how attached parents

[00:20:02] can be but I'm not okay making accommodations for a child that just as easily could not be

[00:20:07] at my wedding.

[00:20:08] My sister-in-law isn't only child so we offer to invite her parents understanding

[00:20:13] that they would set the Airbnb and take care of the baby.

[00:20:16] I didn't like this option even though the Airbnb is booked and I am not exaggerating when

[00:20:21] I say this it is around the corner from the venue.

[00:20:24] We offer them ceremony only options so during cocktail hour they can leave.

[00:20:28] They did not like this option.

[00:20:30] It is clear that the priorities of my fiance's family have become this child.

[00:20:34] I do not want to be resentful of this baby or my sister-in-law yet before we finalized our

[00:20:40] menu we'll be in asked how we can make our wedding comfortable for a baby we didn't expect

[00:20:45] either.

[00:20:46] I'm Ivy Arsol for saying no you cannot use the amenities that are provided to us as a

[00:20:51] bright and groom to give your kids some milk and a nap.

[00:20:55] And we're starting the comments with miffle what who says not the arsol if it gets too much

[00:20:59] you can always tell your sister-in-law that maybe it's best they don't bring the child.

[00:21:03] Prepare for a shit storm, weather it out and when it's all done you'll either find your

[00:21:08] sister-in-law and maybe your mother-in-law will boycott your wedding or they will be grateful

[00:21:12] that you're willing to relent and allow them to bring the child at all.

[00:21:15] Just remember it's not your mom and sister it's your soon to be husband let him worry about

[00:21:21] their relationship you worry about your boundaries and not letting his family walk all over

[00:21:27] you.

[00:21:28] A part ad says not the arsol that's your space they need to use the Airbnb if baby needs

[00:21:34] anything we are having a child free wedding the only exception we've made is to my future

[00:21:38] in f you and says you've also been kind there.

[00:21:42] Next comment says not the arsol this sounds like your fiance's problem my honest assessment

[00:21:47] of the issue is that your fiance needs to uninvite his brother to be his best man at this

[00:21:51] point he should offer his brother and his brothers wife the opportunity to not attend the

[00:21:55] wedding although this is hurtful they're a new family this is a very important part of

[00:22:00] development for your nephew this would seem to be the best solution for both parties involved

[00:22:05] as you would get the wedding you are hoping for and they'd be able to care for their child.

[00:22:10] And marble free says not the arsol and I agree with this of course it's hurtful that

[00:22:15] his whole family is prioritising the baby over the wedding they need to have that conversation

[00:22:19] with his parents he needs to say that you understand they're committed and are excited to help

[00:22:24] with the baby but the wedding is actually about your couple getting married if they aren't

[00:22:29] able to see all the compromises already made and realize they're treating your wedding

[00:22:32] in events like an inconvenience and they will be damaging the relationship going forward

[00:22:37] and will not be included.

[00:22:39] How do people get to this level of entitlement to expect these kind of things that OPs gave

[00:22:45] them so many options so many different compromises and they still don't accept that they still

[00:22:50] demand what they want at your wedding is absolutely bonkers but what would you do in this

[00:22:57] situation is it worth blowing the relationship up over this you never know how other people

[00:23:04] are going to react right?

[00:23:07] Potentially negatively in this one but who knows what do you guys make of this situation

[00:23:11] let us know your thoughts down in the comments below and just a huge thank you from the bottom

[00:23:16] of my heart for getting involved in today's stories your love your support your time always

[00:23:20] means the absolute world to me so thank you so so much and hopefully I'll see you in the

[00:23:25] next one take care.