I Overheard My Dad Tell Another Kid He's The Son He Wished He Had r/Relationships

[00:00:36] [SPEAKER_00]: Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you're well.

[00:00:38] [SPEAKER_00]: My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories.

[00:00:42] [SPEAKER_00]: If you do love a Reddit story, why not consider hitting that like subscribe, maybe that notification

[00:00:47] [SPEAKER_00]: bell too and let's crack on with today's first story.

[00:00:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Much love guys.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Now today's first story comes from the amithearselhere subreddit from fearlesshornet5302 and says

[00:00:59] [SPEAKER_00]: Am I the arsehole here for not forgiving my dad for what he said?

[00:01:03] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad, 45 male, is really into cars.

[00:01:07] [SPEAKER_00]: His dad, my grandpa, is also into cars.

[00:01:10] [SPEAKER_00]: My grandpa used to work in a mechanic shop and my dad learned to work on cars with him.

[00:01:14] [SPEAKER_00]: They can talk for hours about different car models and engines and tell stories about

[00:01:19] [SPEAKER_00]: cars they've worked on.

[00:01:20] [SPEAKER_00]: I, 17 male, am not really into them.

[00:01:23] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad tried to get me into fixing up cars with him but it just doesn't click with

[00:01:27] [SPEAKER_00]: me.

[00:01:28] [SPEAKER_00]: I know basic stuff like how to change a tire or oil and how to jumpstart a battery because

[00:01:33] [SPEAKER_00]: he taught me and I'm glad for it.

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_00]: But talking about cars and working on them for fun, I'm just not into.

[00:01:40] [SPEAKER_00]: I always thought my dad was okay with me not being a car guy.

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Five months ago we got these new neighbors that moved next door.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a married couple and their nephew, Mason, 16 male, lives with them.

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Mason and I go to school together.

[00:01:54] [SPEAKER_00]: At first I helped show him around school until he got comfortable and made his own friends.

[00:01:59] [SPEAKER_00]: He and I talk still but we don't hang out.

[00:02:01] [SPEAKER_00]: Mason is like my dad and grandpa.

[00:02:04] [SPEAKER_00]: He's obsessed with talking about cars and has a whole list of cars he wants to drive

[00:02:08] [SPEAKER_00]: and own one day.

[00:02:10] [SPEAKER_00]: He would come over with his aunt and uncle and a lot of times Mason and his uncle would

[00:02:14] [SPEAKER_00]: hang out with my dad in the garage.

[00:02:16] [SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes I'd be there too but usually it's just them.

[00:02:20] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad usually works on his project car in the garage every other weekend for a couple

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_00]: of hours.

[00:02:25] [SPEAKER_00]: For Father's Day this year, he said he wanted to be able to work on his car all day uninterrupted

[00:02:30] [SPEAKER_00]: which my mom agreed to.

[00:02:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Whenever he works on his car, he leaves the garage door open.

[00:02:36] [SPEAKER_00]: Mason had been coming by when my dad worked on it for the past couple of months and he

[00:02:40] [SPEAKER_00]: talks to my dad and sometimes helps him out with smaller stuff related to the car.

[00:02:44] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't really care.

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad does other stuff with me but on Sunday I went to go ask him something when he was

[00:02:49] [SPEAKER_00]: in the garage with Mason.

[00:02:51] [SPEAKER_00]: The door from the house to the garage was open and him and Mason were talking.

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_00]: I was waiting by the door for a chance to speak but I didn't want to interrupt their

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_00]: conversation.

[00:03:01] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad was praising Mason for whatever he did.

[00:03:04] [SPEAKER_00]: Mason said he had done that with his dad and my dad told Mason his dad would be proud of

[00:03:09] [SPEAKER_00]: him.

[00:03:10] [SPEAKER_00]: Then he said Mason is the kind of son that he wanted to have.

[00:03:14] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know why but that really fucking hurt to hear.

[00:03:18] [SPEAKER_00]: I never thought that me not being into cars was an issue for my dad.

[00:03:22] [SPEAKER_00]: I knew he still loved me but I guess it's not enough.

[00:03:25] [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't say anything and just went back to my room.

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_00]: He doesn't know that I know what he said.

[00:03:30] [SPEAKER_00]: I've been ignoring him since then.

[00:03:32] [SPEAKER_00]: I still answer him when he asks me questions or tells me to do something but I just don't

[00:03:36] [SPEAKER_00]: want to talk to him just because anymore.

[00:03:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Him and my mom 43F have asked me if something is wrong but I lie and say no.

[00:03:44] [SPEAKER_00]: I thought they would just let it go but a few days ago I messed up and told my older

[00:03:48] [SPEAKER_00]: sister 19F what happened because she kept asking.

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Now she's not talking to my dad either and she's being a lot meaner to him about

[00:03:57] [SPEAKER_00]: it but I made her promise not to tell anyone the reason so she's keeping her word.

[00:04:02] [SPEAKER_00]: It's really tense in our house right now.

[00:04:04] [SPEAKER_00]: My parents keep asking us why we're mad at our dad but neither of us are answering

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_00]: and I don't know, I feel like maybe I should just let it go and go back to the way things

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_00]: were.

[00:04:13] [SPEAKER_00]: I really don't want to though but my dad is disappointed in who I am.

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_00]: Am I the asshole here if I don't forgive my dad?

[00:04:21] [SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely I can't blame you for feeling the way you do.

[00:04:24] [SPEAKER_00]: I can't imagine walking in and hearing those words.

[00:04:28] [SPEAKER_00]: It's something you can't take back.

[00:04:30] [SPEAKER_00]: It's something OP said themselves it's going to hurt to hear.

[00:04:34] [SPEAKER_00]: They want you to be someone else.

[00:04:36] [SPEAKER_00]: And look, you don't owe him forgiveness if you don't want to give that.

[00:04:40] [SPEAKER_00]: But part of me says that you should tell him that you did hear this just so he knows how

[00:04:46] [SPEAKER_00]: much those words did hurt.

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Again, you don't have to forgive him for it.

[00:04:51] [SPEAKER_00]: This is simply the truth of what you've heard.

[00:04:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Beck says,

[00:04:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Say, Dad.

[00:04:56] [SPEAKER_00]: I get you're disappointed that I'm not into cars like you and Grandpa.

[00:05:00] [SPEAKER_00]: It's just not my thing, but I do appreciate how you taught me the basics.

[00:05:04] [SPEAKER_00]: But when I went to the garage to see you on Father's Day, I heard you tell Mason that

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_00]: he was the kind of son you wanted or wished you had.

[00:05:11] [SPEAKER_00]: Do you have any idea how hurtful that is?

[00:05:13] [SPEAKER_00]: On Father's Day, I got to hear my dad tell someone else that they were the type of kid

[00:05:18] [SPEAKER_00]: he wanted.

[00:05:19] [SPEAKER_00]: So yeah, I'm hurt.

[00:05:20] [SPEAKER_00]: You said it so casually.

[00:05:22] [SPEAKER_00]: And on Father's Day.

[00:05:23] [SPEAKER_00]: Not the arsehole.

[00:05:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Another commenter says,

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Not the arsehole for anything that you were feeling or not being able to forgive him.

[00:05:30] [SPEAKER_00]: However, you should probably give him the chance to apologize and make amends for hurting

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_00]: you.

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_00]: From what you described, you know he never wanted to hurt you this way.

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_00]: He cares or he wouldn't be concerned about why you're upset.

[00:05:42] [SPEAKER_00]: So give him the chance to make it up to you.

[00:05:44] [SPEAKER_00]: He might mess it up.

[00:05:46] [SPEAKER_00]: You know him better than I do, but you'll feel better about not being able to forgive

[00:05:50] [SPEAKER_00]: him if he messes up again or doesn't feel the need to apologize or make amends.

[00:05:55] [SPEAKER_00]: If you don't feel comfortable taking it to him directly, start with your mom or request

[00:05:59] [SPEAKER_00]: a session with a family therapist.

[00:06:02] [SPEAKER_00]: A commenter replies saying,

[00:06:03] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm more upset at him saying it in the first place.

[00:06:05] [SPEAKER_00]: Even if he felt that way, why couldn't he just keep that thought to himself?

[00:06:09] [SPEAKER_00]: If I tell my mom she's going to confront him, I know it.

[00:06:13] [SPEAKER_00]: A commenter replies saying,

[00:06:14] [SPEAKER_00]: You're absolutely right to be upset.

[00:06:17] [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't mean to downplay what he said and I'm sorry if I came off that way.

[00:06:21] [SPEAKER_00]: Your father should be ashamed for even thinking such a thing, let alone voicing it.

[00:06:25] [SPEAKER_00]: He owes you an apology and an attempt at making amends.

[00:06:29] [SPEAKER_00]: As a member of a family, the only thing you owe him is communication.

[00:06:33] [SPEAKER_00]: To be clear, that means you do not owe him forgiveness no matter how good his apology

[00:06:36] [SPEAKER_00]: or amends are.

[00:06:37] [SPEAKER_00]: If it was unforgivable to you, then it's unforgivable.

[00:06:40] [SPEAKER_00]: But wouldn't you rather live in a world where your father found a way to make this

[00:06:44] [SPEAKER_00]: okay?

[00:06:44] [SPEAKER_00]: It might not be possible, but you can and, in my opinion, should give him the chance

[00:06:49] [SPEAKER_00]: to try.

[00:06:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Opie responds saying,

[00:06:51] [SPEAKER_00]: You didn't downplay anything.

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_00]: To be honest, I'm just here to complain because I keep hearing what he said playing

[00:06:56] [SPEAKER_00]: on a loop in my head.

[00:06:58] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know how he's supposed to make it okay.

[00:07:00] [SPEAKER_00]: He can't make me unhear it.

[00:07:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Understand what you're saying though and thank you for taking the time to say it.

[00:07:06] [SPEAKER_00]: A commenter replies saying,

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_00]: He can't unsay anything.

[00:07:08] [SPEAKER_00]: He can say and do a heck of a lot of stuff to replace that reoccurring thought with though.

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Give you the memory of a sincere apology that you can play over when it crops up, for example.

[00:07:18] [SPEAKER_00]: You could do it for yourself starting right now.

[00:07:21] [SPEAKER_00]: He also meant you were proud of yourself for backing your dad's voice.

[00:07:23] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, well I'm the fucking GOAT at chemistry, fortnite, whatever.

[00:07:27] [SPEAKER_00]: His apology would probably be better ammo, but letting this hurtful words play on repeat

[00:07:31] [SPEAKER_00]: isn't doing you any good.

[00:07:33] [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry, my wife's a therapist.

[00:07:35] [SPEAKER_00]: I hand out her skills like candy.

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_00]: So 3 days later, Opie comes in with an update and says,

[00:07:41] [SPEAKER_00]: So I guess my post was put up on TikTok and my inbox was flooded with a bunch of new comments

[00:07:45] [SPEAKER_00]: and DMs.

[00:07:46] [SPEAKER_00]: There's too many to read but thank you for everyone telling me that I'm not wrong for

[00:07:50] [SPEAKER_00]: not wanting to forgive my dad because it hurts knowing that he said that regardless of why

[00:07:54] [SPEAKER_00]: he said it.

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_00]: I got a lot of questions but our answer to important ones.

[00:07:58] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad did ask to be left alone to work on his car.

[00:08:01] [SPEAKER_00]: But it's not because he didn't want to spend father's day with us.

[00:08:03] [SPEAKER_00]: He had a special breakfast for him and we gave him his gifts in the morning.

[00:08:07] [SPEAKER_00]: The incident happened in the late afternoon.

[00:08:10] [SPEAKER_00]: My mom usually wants to be left alone to work on her art projects or read one of her books

[00:08:14] [SPEAKER_00]: on Mother's Day too.

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_00]: It's not that they don't want to spend the day with us, they just like to be able

[00:08:18] [SPEAKER_00]: to focus on their hobbies without having to worry about household or family duties for

[00:08:22] [SPEAKER_00]: a few hours.

[00:08:23] [SPEAKER_00]: It's normal in my family for my mom and dad to give each other breaks or a day off

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_00]: sometimes.

[00:08:28] [SPEAKER_00]: Another thing is, my dad didn't invite Mason to work on the car with him.

[00:08:31] [SPEAKER_00]: He did tell Mason a while back that if the garage door is open, then Mason is free to

[00:08:36] [SPEAKER_00]: walk in and chat.

[00:08:37] [SPEAKER_00]: That's what Mason usually does.

[00:08:39] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad doesn't talk to him outside of when Mason comes over by himself or with his aunt

[00:08:44] [SPEAKER_00]: and uncle.

[00:08:45] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't think my dad even has Mason's number.

[00:08:47] [SPEAKER_00]: They're not really close, they just both like cars.

[00:08:50] [SPEAKER_00]: I know most people told me to tell my mom or dad or both about what I heard.

[00:08:54] [SPEAKER_00]: I was kind of hoping the tension would go away and just be forgotten.

[00:08:58] [SPEAKER_00]: What I know is dumb and not realistic, but I really didn't want to have that awkward

[00:09:02] [SPEAKER_00]: conversation so I just kept quiet.

[00:09:05] [SPEAKER_00]: Things got really bad today.

[00:09:07] [SPEAKER_00]: My sister and I still were mostly ignoring our dad.

[00:09:10] [SPEAKER_00]: My mom would keep asking us a bunch of questions and guessing reasons why we were mad.

[00:09:14] [SPEAKER_00]: I thought she gave up, but earlier today she said we're going to have a family game night

[00:09:18] [SPEAKER_00]: tonight, which we never really do.

[00:09:21] [SPEAKER_00]: I really didn't feel like doing that, but I was going to sit there and just deal with

[00:09:24] [SPEAKER_00]: it.

[00:09:24] [SPEAKER_00]: But my sister told mom we won't be joining if dad is there.

[00:09:28] [SPEAKER_00]: My mom asked why, but my sister just said he knows what he did.

[00:09:32] [SPEAKER_00]: So my mom went to talk to our dad and like an hour later she made us all sit down in

[00:09:36] [SPEAKER_00]: the living room to talk.

[00:09:38] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad was mad now.

[00:09:40] [SPEAKER_00]: He told us we need to say whatever is on our minds because now our mom is asking us if

[00:09:44] [SPEAKER_00]: we caught him cheating on her or something.

[00:09:46] [SPEAKER_00]: She was running out of theories for why we were mad.

[00:09:49] [SPEAKER_00]: To be fair, she guessed it right on the second day asking if he had something to make me mad

[00:09:54] [SPEAKER_00]: or upset, but I lied and said no at the time.

[00:09:57] [SPEAKER_00]: She says she knows it has something to do with me because I was mad at him first, so

[00:10:02] [SPEAKER_00]: I finally told her what I overheard my dad say.

[00:10:04] [SPEAKER_00]: My mom was shocked and my dad immediately denied it which really sucked, because if

[00:10:09] [SPEAKER_00]: he thought it and said it out loud he could at least also have the balls to admit it,

[00:10:14] [SPEAKER_00]: but he didn't.

[00:10:15] [SPEAKER_00]: He kept saying he didn't say that, but I told him I know what I heard.

[00:10:18] [SPEAKER_00]: He tried to lie and say that what he said was that Mason's dad would be proud of him.

[00:10:23] [SPEAKER_00]: That's true, and that if Mason was his son he'd be proud of the kind of person he was.

[00:10:28] [SPEAKER_00]: That's a lie.

[00:10:30] [SPEAKER_00]: He didn't say that.

[00:10:31] [SPEAKER_00]: My sister got mad and told him to stop gaslighting me.

[00:10:35] [SPEAKER_00]: Then they argued for a couple of minutes until my mom stopped them.

[00:10:38] [SPEAKER_00]: My mom asked me if I was sure what I heard and I said yes.

[00:10:41] [SPEAKER_00]: I told her exactly what he said to Mason.

[00:10:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Your dad would be proud of you.

[00:10:45] [SPEAKER_00]: I know I would be.

[00:10:46] [SPEAKER_00]: You're exactly the kind of son I wanted to have.

[00:10:49] [SPEAKER_00]: I know that because I keep hearing my dad's voice saying it over and over in my head.

[00:10:52] [SPEAKER_00]: I've been hearing it whenever I look at him since that day.

[00:10:56] [SPEAKER_00]: And my mom turned to my dad and started yelling at him for saying that.

[00:10:59] [SPEAKER_00]: So my dad finally admitted it, but said that I misunderstood him.

[00:11:03] [SPEAKER_00]: He says he was trying to make Mason feel better because Mason was sad and kept talking about

[00:11:08] [SPEAKER_00]: his dad that died because it was father's day.

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_00]: My dad wasn't trying to put me down or say that I was a disappointment to him.

[00:11:14] [SPEAKER_00]: He said he was sorry and tried to hug me, but I was honestly mad that he denied it first

[00:11:19] [SPEAKER_00]: so I didn't let him.

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[00:12:18] [SPEAKER_00]: My mom didn't accept his reasoning either.

[00:12:24] [SPEAKER_00]: She said that Mason, his aunt and uncle aren't invited anymore and that we're just gonna

[00:12:29] [SPEAKER_00]: be neighbors from now on and that's it.

[00:12:31] [SPEAKER_00]: I feel bad because they didn't do anything wrong.

[00:12:34] [SPEAKER_00]: But my mom kept going and telling my dad that he needs to stop spending so much time on

[00:12:38] [SPEAKER_00]: his stupid car and start paying more attention to his family.

[00:12:41] [SPEAKER_00]: He really doesn't spend a lot of time on it.

[00:12:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe like 2 days out of the month for 3-4 hours.

[00:12:47] [SPEAKER_00]: I think she was just really mad at him.

[00:12:49] [SPEAKER_00]: Which is what I was worried about.

[00:12:50] [SPEAKER_00]: So my dad shouted that he'd just get rid of the car then since everyone suddenly has

[00:12:54] [SPEAKER_00]: a problem with his hobby.

[00:12:56] [SPEAKER_00]: He left to my uncle's house, his brother, after that and I don't think he's coming

[00:13:00] [SPEAKER_00]: back tonight.

[00:13:01] [SPEAKER_00]: I feel really bad.

[00:13:03] [SPEAKER_00]: I should have just let it go.

[00:13:04] [SPEAKER_00]: I really want to but I can't.

[00:13:06] [SPEAKER_00]: If he hadn't tried to lie and just said sorry maybe I would have accepted his apology

[00:13:10] [SPEAKER_00]: and this would be done.

[00:13:12] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not even really mad anymore.

[00:13:14] [SPEAKER_00]: I just feel like a failure.

[00:13:15] [SPEAKER_00]: I wish I could have just been more into cars.

[00:13:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Then this whole thing would have never happened.

[00:13:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry it's not a happy update but a lot of people were asking for one.

[00:13:24] [SPEAKER_00]: I hope he comes back home soon.

[00:13:25] [SPEAKER_00]: So the first commenter on that update said it's not your fault.

[00:13:28] [SPEAKER_00]: That's a whole mess of issues here that might need some family therapy to help resolve.

[00:13:33] [SPEAKER_00]: Material Tree says You are who you are and like what you like.

[00:13:37] [SPEAKER_00]: You shouldn't have to force yourself to like your dad's hobbies for his approval or anything

[00:13:40] [SPEAKER_00]: else.

[00:13:41] [SPEAKER_00]: You are not a failure and there's nothing for you to feel bad about.

[00:13:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Your dad is the failure in this situation and a tantrum throwing liar too.

[00:13:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Hoppy says everyone was ganging up on him so I don't know if I blame him for leaving.

[00:13:54] [SPEAKER_00]: I'd probably do the same thing if I was him to be honest.

[00:13:56] [SPEAKER_00]: The leaving part not the lying and denial part.

[00:13:59] [SPEAKER_00]: My mum says he's probably just embarrassed about the whole thing and that we all need

[00:14:03] [SPEAKER_00]: to cool off right now but he'll be back tomorrow.

[00:14:06] [SPEAKER_00]: But you said you don't blame him for leaving you would do the same thing if you were him

[00:14:10] [SPEAKER_00]: and everyone was ganging up on you.

[00:14:13] [SPEAKER_00]: But at the same time you wouldn't have done what your dad did in that situation so you

[00:14:18] [SPEAKER_00]: wouldn't have found yourself in that situation to begin with.

[00:14:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Which poku says dude everyone was ganging up on him cuz what he said is super messed

[00:14:24] [SPEAKER_00]: up and refused to admit to do it.

[00:14:26] [SPEAKER_00]: He's a coward.

[00:14:27] [SPEAKER_00]: I know he's your dad and you love him but you are finally seeing his faults and as

[00:14:31] [SPEAKER_00]: a kid that idolizes his dad yet can't connect with him like other kids I know that hurts

[00:14:36] [SPEAKER_00]: that it tears you inside.

[00:14:38] [SPEAKER_00]: That it's your father's fault kid not yours.

[00:14:40] [SPEAKER_00]: It's on your father to find a way to work on his own feelings but not letting them

[00:14:44] [SPEAKER_00]: affect his kids.

[00:14:45] [SPEAKER_00]: It's the bare minimum of what any good father does.

[00:14:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Now he's mad cuz he knows he's wrong but he's stubborn so the last thing he'd do

[00:14:52] [SPEAKER_00]: is admit that.

[00:14:53] [SPEAKER_00]: So he needs to be the victim for the behavior to be justified so he makes himself the victim.

[00:14:58] [SPEAKER_00]: Poku says I'm not saying he didn't deserve to have everyone telling him he was wrong.

[00:15:02] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm just saying having your whole family taking turns yelling at you is a lot even

[00:15:06] [SPEAKER_00]: if it is his fault.

[00:15:08] [SPEAKER_00]: So I don't blame him for leaving.

[00:15:09] [SPEAKER_00]: I just want him to come back now.

[00:15:11] [SPEAKER_00]: And I hate that it turned into an issue of him working on his car cuz it wasn't even

[00:15:14] [SPEAKER_00]: about that.

[00:15:15] [SPEAKER_00]: It was supposed to be about what he said.

[00:15:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Prompter says from the way your mom reacted it seems like it was a bigger issue than just

[00:15:21] [SPEAKER_00]: that.

[00:15:22] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe you helped your mom finally put her foot down on this.

[00:15:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Material Tree says Your mom is probably right.

[00:15:29] [SPEAKER_00]: He was embarrassed his lies didn't hold up.

[00:15:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Embarrassed he was caught saying that and embarrassed that your mom was rightfully calling

[00:15:35] [SPEAKER_00]: him out.

[00:15:35] [SPEAKER_00]: Hopefully once emotions are cool you guys can talk things out and he gives you the apology

[00:15:40] [SPEAKER_00]: he owes you.

[00:15:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Please remember that the fault here is with one person and you are not him.

[00:15:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Opie responds saying this might sound stupid because no one here really knows my dad or

[00:15:51] [SPEAKER_00]: our relationship but he did mean the apology he gave me.

[00:15:54] [SPEAKER_00]: He said hey I'm sorry bud and tried to hug me.

[00:15:58] [SPEAKER_00]: He only calls me bud when he's being 100% serious about something like telling me someone's

[00:16:02] [SPEAKER_00]: in the hospital kind of serious and he sounded completely genuine when he said that.

[00:16:07] [SPEAKER_00]: I just hate that he didn't start there instead of trying to lie his way out first.

[00:16:11] [SPEAKER_00]: Prompter says nah that doesn't sound stupid at all you know him and experienced him in

[00:16:15] [SPEAKER_00]: that moment so I do believe you.

[00:16:18] [SPEAKER_00]: But as a parent and as a daughter with a dad like that I can't help but be angry for you.

[00:16:23] [SPEAKER_00]: I spent most of my life doing what I thought would earn his admiration or at the very

[00:16:27] [SPEAKER_00]: least his attention.

[00:16:29] [SPEAKER_00]: Nothing worked and it sucked because none of it fit my interests.

[00:16:33] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't want that for anyone else.

[00:16:34] [SPEAKER_00]: You are absolutely right that he should have owned up to his mistake instead of compounding

[00:16:38] [SPEAKER_00]: it.

[00:16:39] [SPEAKER_00]: You deserve so much better than his words and actions and I hope he can be better from

[00:16:43] [SPEAKER_00]: now on and that your relationship with him gets better in time.

[00:16:47] [SPEAKER_00]: The final comment says hey I know you might not feel true yet but you did some brave important

[00:16:52] [SPEAKER_00]: things in that conversation.

[00:16:54] [SPEAKER_00]: You told the truth and you stood up for yourself.

[00:16:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Your dad lied and deflected and stormed off for reasons that have nothing to do with you

[00:17:01] [SPEAKER_00]: and everything to do with his emotional maturity.

[00:17:04] [SPEAKER_00]: That's a tough thing to learn because as kids it feels safer to believe that we're

[00:17:07] [SPEAKER_00]: the problem because then we can fix it but this isn't on you.

[00:17:12] [SPEAKER_00]: Try to be kind to yourself and maybe spend some time with your mom or sister or friends

[00:17:16] [SPEAKER_00]: who make you feel good.

[00:17:17] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe he says thank you for saying this I really needed to hear some of that.

[00:17:21] [SPEAKER_00]: And some of the comments talking about the immaturity of him stomping off there and it

[00:17:25] [SPEAKER_00]: always brings me back to that book now.

[00:17:27] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a really great book if you haven't read it before from Lindsay C Gibson, Adult

[00:17:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Children of Emotionally Immature Parents.

[00:17:35] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not saying it's directly linked to this particular situation but it always pops

[00:17:39] [SPEAKER_00]: into my head and I always like to give it a plug when I can because it's a great book.

[00:17:44] [SPEAKER_00]: NOP if you ever do get to hear this you did absolutely nothing wrong in this situation.

[00:17:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Remember that you didn't cause this all you did is tell the truth and you have to

[00:17:55] [SPEAKER_00]: think what the alternative was here that you sit on this information and let it fester.

[00:18:00] [SPEAKER_00]: That's not healthy at all.

[00:18:01] [SPEAKER_00]: So getting this information out there and confronting it is a great way maybe family

[00:18:06] [SPEAKER_00]: therapy like one of the comments has said.

[00:18:08] [SPEAKER_00]: But can I just say a sister in this scenario what a legend definitely need someone like

[00:18:13] [SPEAKER_00]: her in your corner don't you?

[00:18:14] [SPEAKER_00]: But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:18:17] [SPEAKER_00]: What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:18:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below and let's move on to another story.

[00:18:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Now our next story is from kindplane7403 from the am I the arsehole subreddit no update

[00:18:32] [SPEAKER_00]: is yet but it says am I the arsehole for doing a half ass job taking family pictures at a

[00:18:38] [SPEAKER_00]: wedding after being told to shut up and stop being a smart ass.

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_00]: I was taking pictures at a family wedding as a favor.

[00:18:45] [SPEAKER_00]: I was being paid about half of what I normally charge and I was fine with it.

[00:18:49] [SPEAKER_00]: The bride is my favorite cousin and her husband is amazing.

[00:18:53] [SPEAKER_00]: During the formals the wedding party was great and I got lots of great shots.

[00:18:57] [SPEAKER_00]: When it came time to take pictures of different family groups with the couple people were

[00:19:02] [SPEAKER_00]: assholes.

[00:19:03] [SPEAKER_00]: They wouldn't stop talking or looking away from the camera.

[00:19:06] [SPEAKER_00]: I tried politely reminding everyone that the camera was the big black thing on the tripod

[00:19:10] [SPEAKER_00]: and that it took still images not video.

[00:19:13] [SPEAKER_00]: I was repeatedly told to shut up and stop being a smart ass and that they knew what

[00:19:17] [SPEAKER_00]: a camera was.

[00:19:19] [SPEAKER_00]: I asked my wife to record video of the responses for me.

[00:19:22] [SPEAKER_00]: My cousin was delighted with the pictures from the ceremony, the formals and the reception.

[00:19:27] [SPEAKER_00]: She laughed her ass off at the family pictures.

[00:19:29] [SPEAKER_00]: In about half of them people are looking off in all directions instead of at the camera.

[00:19:34] [SPEAKER_00]: In most of those there are also people with their mouths open.

[00:19:36] [SPEAKER_00]: She thought they were hilarious and her husband agreed.

[00:19:40] [SPEAKER_00]: I started getting shit on social media from my family about the terrible pictures.

[00:19:44] [SPEAKER_00]: I replied that I had tried to explain to them that the camera was the big black thing on

[00:19:48] [SPEAKER_00]: the tripod and it only took still pictures.

[00:19:50] [SPEAKER_00]: They said I should have waited for them to be ready.

[00:19:53] [SPEAKER_00]: So I started posting the short video clips of people being jackasses towards me.

[00:19:58] [SPEAKER_00]: My mom said I went too far and that they won't ask me to take pictures for them again.

[00:20:02] [SPEAKER_00]: I did a fake cry and said boo hoo and she called me a smart aleck.

[00:20:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Please let me state that I do not think I'm the asshole in this situation but many people

[00:20:12] [SPEAKER_00]: do.

[00:20:13] [SPEAKER_00]: They're upset because they don't often dress up and get together and they didn't

[00:20:16] [SPEAKER_00]: get good pictures.

[00:20:19] [SPEAKER_00]: In the comments Bulbasaur Ranch says not the asshole.

[00:20:22] [SPEAKER_00]: The photos are an accurate reflection of their behavior on the day.

[00:20:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Only people that opinions matter about the photos is the bride and groom that hired you.

[00:20:29] [SPEAKER_00]: They like it then no issues.

[00:20:31] [SPEAKER_00]: They've embarrassed themselves and don't like that their online tantrum turned around

[00:20:35] [SPEAKER_00]: on them.

[00:20:36] [SPEAKER_00]: It's easier to be right until the evidence comes forward.

[00:20:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Engineer Huge says not the asshole.

[00:20:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Sounds like they're your family members and they were ignoring you and being rude.

[00:20:46] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe they thought they were being funny.

[00:20:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe they don't take you seriously as a professional.

[00:20:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever.

[00:20:51] [SPEAKER_00]: That's their problem.

[00:20:52] [SPEAKER_00]: You tried to keep them on task.

[00:20:54] [SPEAKER_00]: If they wanted nice professional photos of themselves they could have paid attention

[00:20:57] [SPEAKER_00]: when photos were being taken.

[00:20:59] [SPEAKER_00]: What did they think was going on?

[00:21:01] [SPEAKER_00]: Another commenter quotes a bit about their cousin laughing her ass off and says this

[00:21:05] [SPEAKER_00]: is all that matters.

[00:21:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Not the asshole.

[00:21:08] [SPEAKER_00]: The others are experiencing textbook fuck around and find out.

[00:21:11] [SPEAKER_00]: That's their problem.

[00:21:13] [SPEAKER_00]: When you post proof of their misbehavior it's just more of that.

[00:21:16] [SPEAKER_00]: You aren't the asshole for defending yourself at all, particularly when the couple doesn't

[00:21:20] [SPEAKER_00]: mind either.

[00:21:21] [SPEAKER_00]: But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:21:25] [SPEAKER_00]: What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:21:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below.