I Cut Off My Family Years Ago And Now They Want Back Into My Life r/Relationships

[00:00:03] [SPEAKER_00]: Hey Waffle Gang I do hope you're well, my name is Mark, entered, they were checking out

[00:00:08] [SPEAKER_00]: some more Reddit stories and if you do love a Reddit story why not consider in that like

[00:00:13] [SPEAKER_00]: subscribe maybe that notification bell too and let's crack on with today's first story.

[00:00:19] [SPEAKER_00]: Much love guys, now today's first story comes from their relationship advice subreddit

[00:00:23] [SPEAKER_00]: from a throwaway account and says I female 25 went no contact with my family. Male

[00:00:30] [SPEAKER_00]: 54, female 50 and male 20 when I was 18. Now they're reaching out what should I do?

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever reason my parents didn't want me. Once they had my brother who well called Adam

[00:00:46] [SPEAKER_00]: I was pretty much ignored. They didn't abuse me but I was pretty neglected. Everything

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_00]: was about Adam and how smart he was or how athletic he was or how he was just

[00:00:57] [SPEAKER_00]: the best thing since sliced bread. And there's me, a pretty average kid who got decent grades,

[00:01:03] [SPEAKER_00]: didn't play sports, wasn't super popular and liked to read books. I can't tell you

[00:01:08] [SPEAKER_00]: how many times I heard but I can't you be more like Adam. What made me cut off my

[00:01:14] [SPEAKER_00]: family was when they didn't attend my high school graduation. Adam had gone hurt that

[00:01:19] [SPEAKER_00]: morning, a sprayed ankle I was eventually told and our parents rushed into the ER

[00:01:24] [SPEAKER_00]: because he swore up and down he broke his leg. Only got one text from my mom telling me that

[00:01:30] [SPEAKER_00]: they would make it up to me with a dinner to some family restaurant I mildly enjoyed.

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_00]: I was done after that. I'd been used to being neglected or forgotten about but

[00:01:39] [SPEAKER_00]: I thought they would at least attend my graduation. I moved out that summer to

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_00]: go live with my cousin, female 30 and her wife in Arizona. Then I blocked them and

[00:01:50] [SPEAKER_00]: haven't been in my life since. My family did try to get in contact with me after I left but

[00:01:55] [SPEAKER_00]: was mostly just telling me I was a bad daughter and overly sensitive and didn't care about Adam.

[00:02:01] [SPEAKER_00]: Years later, I still didn't have any contact with them. I'm now married to my husband John,

[00:02:07] [SPEAKER_00]: male 26 who loves me and treats me like I matter. He also have a daughter,

[00:02:12] [SPEAKER_00]: two female that I love more than the world itself. I have a close-knit group of friends

[00:02:17] [SPEAKER_00]: and a job that makes decent money that I enjoy. I'm not saying my life is perfect or a dream or

[00:02:23] [SPEAKER_00]: anything but it definitely leagues better than my childhood. Which brings me to last week when

[00:02:29] [SPEAKER_00]: my cousin called to tell me they had a message from my parents and my brother. This isn't

[00:02:34] [SPEAKER_00]: anything new but the message itself was. Instead of the usual blame game,

[00:02:39] [SPEAKER_00]: my cousin told me that they wanted to apologize for everything. With Father's Day coming up,

[00:02:44] [SPEAKER_00]: they were hoping I could come down to visit with my family and we could have a discussion.

[00:02:50] [SPEAKER_00]: I know most people would scream, don't, is a trap, they want something from you. But I'm not so

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_00]: sure. For one thing none of them have ever reached out to apologize for anything towards me

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_00]: but I still have connections to my extended family. So I have info about my parents and Adam

[00:03:05] [SPEAKER_00]: from them. None of them are sick or dying or need an organ. They're not in debt and need

[00:03:11] [SPEAKER_00]: help with finances. My parents aren't hoping to retire and want to be supported. Adam doesn't

[00:03:16] [SPEAKER_00]: need help with student loans, scholarship kid. So it could be genuine. But at the same time,

[00:03:22] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if I care enough to have a discussion. My life has been great without them.

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_00]: So why do I need them now? I wanted them as a kid but not anymore. However,

[00:03:32] [SPEAKER_00]: John says this could be a genuine olive branch since they never apologize.

[00:03:36] [SPEAKER_00]: You might be right. Even if I don't agree to have contact, I might finally get some closure or at

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_00]: least some answers as to why they didn't want me or why Adam was so much better than me.

[00:03:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Should I hear them out or just tell my cousin to tell them go step on Legos?

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_00]: I'll take any advice at this point. These ones are always, I find anyway,

[00:03:58] [SPEAKER_00]: incredibly hard to comment on because it all depends on your individual feelings.

[00:04:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Like you said, you could go and it might give you some closure if you think that's what it's

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_00]: going to do. Then fair play to you. You don't have to forgive them. You can hear them out.

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_00]: You can ask them questions about what the fuck happened in your past, why they treated you like

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_00]: that. Or at the same time, you can ask yourself the question about what have they brought your

[00:04:21] [SPEAKER_00]: life? They brought nothing and I'm suspecting that they want in your life now because you

[00:04:26] [SPEAKER_00]: have a child. That's what popped into my mind initially, that they want to be involved

[00:04:30] [SPEAKER_00]: in the grandchild's life. My mind and because you know, God knows how many of these Reddit stories

[00:04:36] [SPEAKER_00]: now is that they're doing it for some shitty reason. You've covered a lot of the usual bases about

[00:04:41] [SPEAKER_00]: the organs and stuff like that, but I suspect this going to be something crappy. Now, if I was

[00:04:47] [SPEAKER_00]: in your position and I'm not saying OP should do this at all, as I said, they should make their

[00:04:52] [SPEAKER_00]: choice, make their own choices. I'm always super curious in my mind about I want to

[00:04:58] [SPEAKER_00]: ask the questions. I quite I like the closure. I don't think it would change my view of them.

[00:05:03] [SPEAKER_00]: I would like to hear what they have to say just because the trash cat attack says from someone

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_00]: who is also no contact with immediate family members, I suggest you weigh the cost and benefit.

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_00]: What will it cost you emotionally financially physically? And is it worth the risk? Walk

[00:05:20] [SPEAKER_00]: through possible outcomes best case and worst case scenarios for me if they wanted to apologize

[00:05:25] [SPEAKER_00]: and talk. I wouldn't be willing to take the time and money fly to them and do it on their terms.

[00:05:30] [SPEAKER_00]: They could have sent a letter right. The answer is yes. Due to the gaslighting and

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_00]: psychological manipulation my family has put me through. I'd want it all in writing.

[00:05:41] [SPEAKER_00]: I'd hear them out but want to see it before I even gave it a chance.

[00:05:46] [SPEAKER_00]: OP says they don't actually have my address so they couldn't send a letter directly to me.

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_00]: They could send it to my cousin and she could always give it to me.

[00:05:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Square half says I would not contact them. I highly doubt they're remorseful. It's likely that

[00:06:00] [SPEAKER_00]: they want something. You have your family now husband and child. Why allow your parents to

[00:06:05] [SPEAKER_00]: say anything? OP says if they did want something, I feel like my cousin would have

[00:06:10] [SPEAKER_00]: told me or warned me that something was going on then yet there aren't any signs that they

[00:06:15] [SPEAKER_00]: need anything other than have a discussion with me apparently.

[00:06:20] [SPEAKER_00]: ET says they want access to your daughter. I would be cautious. OP says I thought that too

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_00]: but my husband said that if they just wanted access to our daughter

[00:06:29] [SPEAKER_00]: they would have tried to reach me when she was born unless my brother is suddenly sterile.

[00:06:34] [SPEAKER_00]: It's not like they won't have any more grandkids. Scuppersplug says girl you just

[00:06:39] [SPEAKER_00]: got past the most miserable babysitting years slash the years where you're most exhausted

[00:06:43] [SPEAKER_00]: and likely to need a break. Makes total sense for self-absorbed grandparents to only reach out

[00:06:49] [SPEAKER_00]: now that she's a precious two year old in their minds now they can be fun grandparents instead

[00:06:54] [SPEAKER_00]: of helpful ones. OP says reading this remind me of what my mother used to say to me all the time.

[00:07:01] [SPEAKER_00]: You were a difficult baby always crying and whining and needy. Your brother was so easy

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_00]: and such an angel OP then continues now I'm thinking you might be onto something like maybe

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_00]: they didn't want to see my baby in her infancy because they thought you'd be just like me

[00:07:17] [SPEAKER_00]: and god forbid they deal with that again slash sarcasm. So OP came back into the post some days

[00:07:26] [SPEAKER_00]: later and says hey guys a lot of you gave solid advice on my first post I really appreciate it

[00:07:32] [SPEAKER_00]: I did ask my friends for their own advice too but they had more plus their kneecap school of

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_00]: thought funny but not so helpful at the time anyway even though a lot of you warned me I was

[00:07:44] [SPEAKER_00]: just too curious to not talk to my family still I told my cousin to tell them that I was not

[00:07:49] [SPEAKER_00]: meeting them for father's day I'd always intended to reject the idea I wanted to celebrate John

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_00]: and my father-in-law for being awesome and I wanted to do a zoom meeting instead I was

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_00]: expecting them to pitch a fit but they agreed yesterday we met on zoom I made sure to have

[00:08:06] [SPEAKER_00]: a meeting at my cousin's house because my cousin is my space and I don't like intruders

[00:08:10] [SPEAKER_00]: whether in person or virtual John was hiding in the room at a site and my daughter was with my

[00:08:16] [SPEAKER_00]: cousin's wife long story short my mother is a revolving door and both my parents are idiots

[00:08:23] [SPEAKER_00]: to make it a longer story my mother had an affair with my uncle Rick

[00:08:28] [SPEAKER_00]: male 60 my dad's older brother I got caught after she found out she was pregnant

[00:08:33] [SPEAKER_00]: my dad forgave her and agreed to raise me as his as long as they never did a paternity test

[00:08:39] [SPEAKER_00]: apparently was easy to act as my father if he didn't have confirmation that I was his brother's child

[00:08:46] [SPEAKER_00]: spoiler alert I'm not Rick's kid unfortunately for me I've always been my dad's bio-daughter

[00:08:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Rick apparently can't have kids and my dad only found out on mother's day when Rick's wife

[00:08:57] [SPEAKER_00]: made a joke about it so my parents just resented me all this time because they were convinced

[00:09:02] [SPEAKER_00]: I was Rick's child despite not having proof it didn't help that I was just so mediocre compared to Adam

[00:09:10] [SPEAKER_00]: like how Rick is compared to my dad what I mean by that is my dad has a fancy desk job in a

[00:09:17] [SPEAKER_00]: titled position and Rick is just your average truck driver so clearly that must have meant

[00:09:21] [SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't be my father's child slash sarcasm they beg for forgiveness my mom tried to blame

[00:09:28] [SPEAKER_00]: my dad for not taking the test my dad tried to blame it on my mom for being a truck stop for Rick

[00:09:34] [SPEAKER_00]: but they both wanted me to forgive them because they were sick with the regret of how they treated

[00:09:39] [SPEAKER_00]: me over a misunderstanding they swore up and down even if they were always there for me they

[00:09:46] [SPEAKER_00]: still loved me and were still my parents and we can be a real family now that the misunderstanding

[00:09:51] [SPEAKER_00]: was finally cleared up even Adam was pushing hard for it people asked about our relationship in my

[00:09:58] [SPEAKER_00]: last post but there's not really much to say he was like a roommate I was never bullied by him and

[00:10:05] [SPEAKER_00]: he didn't really interact with me though he definitely reveled in our parents' favoritism still

[00:10:10] [SPEAKER_00]: they were all very sorry but I had to understand why my parents acted like they did now everyone

[00:10:16] [SPEAKER_00]: wants to make it up to me and be a part of my life again and be the best grandparents and uncle

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_00]: they can be my daughter I obviously told them no anyone with eyes could see they just wanted

[00:10:27] [SPEAKER_00]: forgiveness to make themselves feel better I told them that my life was better without them

[00:10:31] [SPEAKER_00]: and I didn't need them anymore they got mad at that and called me heartless and cruel and a

[00:10:37] [SPEAKER_00]: bad daughter for being so unforgiving and for not being more understanding towards them

[00:10:42] [SPEAKER_00]: because it was just a mistake that had a shitty childhood and had to play second fiddle to Adam

[00:10:47] [SPEAKER_00]: I just told them to forget I existed and ended the call then I burst into tears and my husband had

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_00]: to comfort me their insults didn't hurt me even after all this time of no contact I'm used to

[00:10:59] [SPEAKER_00]: that but all that time feeling like shit and suicidal and wondering what I did to deserve

[00:11:05] [SPEAKER_00]: my mistreatment was just a waste or because my parents were massive douche canoes with chicken

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_00]: nuggets for brains I'm glad I didn't waste money to go see them I'm also glad I heard them out from

[00:11:17] [SPEAKER_00]: my enclosure they're trying to aggressively reach out and contact me even getting other relatives to

[00:11:23] [SPEAKER_00]: do so I've already got a bunch of emails and texts this morning ranging from please to just hear

[00:11:28] [SPEAKER_00]: them and insults about being cruel and heartless I've been ignoring them because I've washed

[00:11:33] [SPEAKER_00]: my hands in my family and will continue to remain in no contact so yeah thank you for all

[00:11:38] [SPEAKER_00]: your advice it meant a lot my word I am so pissed off for you op that after all this they got mad at

[00:11:48] [SPEAKER_00]: you and called you heartless and cruel and a bad daughter again after what they fucking put you

[00:11:54] [SPEAKER_00]: through are you kidding me you're not wrong about them having chicken nuggets for brains

[00:12:00] [SPEAKER_00]: and look I'm not saying you should reply to any of these other relatives but what have they

[00:12:05] [SPEAKER_00]: been told in this situation if they know the full story here and they're still backing them up they're

[00:12:09] [SPEAKER_00]: just as bad as them and petty me petty me this is would want to like just have like a

[00:12:16] [SPEAKER_00]: a scripted response to all these people outing exactly what happened to you and what went on

[00:12:23] [SPEAKER_00]: the mom the uncle rick the dad thinking that you weren't his and then i'm treating you like

[00:12:29] [SPEAKER_00]: shit to the point of suicidal thoughts what you had to go through then cut these ourselves off

[00:12:34] [SPEAKER_00]: and enjoy your life like you said at the beginning if they offered you nothing they bring nothing to

[00:12:40] [SPEAKER_00]: your life you have good life a good support system around you go and enjoy that and forget about

[00:12:45] [SPEAKER_00]: these people there was a couple of top comments on this one so prior benefit said I'm sorry you

[00:12:50] [SPEAKER_00]: had to go through this what a cluster of curious says your daisity of saying you were so mediocre

[00:12:57] [SPEAKER_00]: clearly there was no way would ever think you're biologically dad's so really it's your own

[00:13:01] [SPEAKER_00]: fault for being so mid you owe them forgiveness and understanding because you suck too much to be

[00:13:06] [SPEAKER_00]: treated well by your parents hmm you know what at least you got an answer it's a moronic answer but

[00:13:13] [SPEAKER_00]: it's an answer now you know that your family remains shit good for them they have each other

[00:13:18] [SPEAKER_00]: stay on course you've clearly nothing to gain from mending fences except being called too

[00:13:24] [SPEAKER_00]: average to be some fancy successful arseholes kid mele dramatic mouth says I kind of wonder

[00:13:31] [SPEAKER_00]: if they ever did a paternity test on the golden child that would be interesting and I bet possibly

[00:13:36] [SPEAKER_00]: somewhat surprising I think that if anyone wants to get a hold of opium in the future she should

[00:13:41] [SPEAKER_00]: demand one as a stipulation it'd be hilarious if Adam ends up not being dad's kid didn't even

[00:13:48] [SPEAKER_00]: consider that holy moly what do you guys make of this situation let us know your thoughts down in

[00:13:55] [SPEAKER_00]: the comments below and let's move on to another story now our next story comes from the entitled

[00:14:03] [SPEAKER_00]: people subreddit it does have an update as well from kinder deadly who says brother complains

[00:14:08] [SPEAKER_00]: about family using his inherited summer cabin while staying at our home for free it starts off

[00:14:14] [SPEAKER_00]: like grunt for fuck's sake he's 40 and has no idea how to spend or save money

[00:14:20] [SPEAKER_00]: he's got dad's cabin worth a hundred thousand and is now bitching that we the other siblings

[00:14:25] [SPEAKER_00]: got money ten thousand and he wants cash too to buy a new guitar because he still thinks he can

[00:14:32] [SPEAKER_00]: make it big in music lol no meanwhile spending hundreds on designer clothes for his teen son

[00:14:39] [SPEAKER_00]: we often yells and cusses at he stays with us many weekends when he has band practice in our town

[00:14:45] [SPEAKER_00]: because our terminally ill mom lives with us and wants him by and because I'm the scapegoat

[00:14:51] [SPEAKER_00]: who was just ready to buy a house with my husband when dad died two years ago

[00:14:55] [SPEAKER_00]: and mom has been dying for years now well she's kicking cancer and inviting my asshole

[00:15:01] [SPEAKER_00]: brother over every chance she gets we my family haven't even used the cabin once since dad

[00:15:07] [SPEAKER_00]: passed and I know mom still pays a lot towards it but I'm getting very mildly infuriated about my

[00:15:13] [SPEAKER_00]: golden child brother and narcissistic mother I've decided to ban him from here since his last stupid

[00:15:19] [SPEAKER_00]: outburst no more visits here without his wife who I adore in kids it really sucked having to

[00:15:26] [SPEAKER_00]: live with your narcissistic mom who's so obviously favors your brother so can't live with him

[00:15:32] [SPEAKER_00]: she can't live with him because obviously he doesn't want that nor can he afford the

[00:15:37] [SPEAKER_00]: money or time plus it seems his marriage is failing soon too so helpful our assess to OP

[00:15:43] [SPEAKER_00]: you don't have to live with your narcissistic mother who so obviously favors your brother

[00:15:49] [SPEAKER_00]: they made you the scapegoat growing up and that's a shitty thing for parents to do

[00:15:53] [SPEAKER_00]: but you don't have to spend your whole life in that role OP says that's so fucked

[00:15:58] [SPEAKER_00]: it wasn't supposed to be this long because she was told by doctors she might only have

[00:16:03] [SPEAKER_00]: weeks like three years ago and again maybe a year ago but she won't let anyone else into these

[00:16:09] [SPEAKER_00]: appointments so who knows now I can't toss her out without becoming an asshole myself I think

[00:16:15] [SPEAKER_00]: she's living on for spite lol sorry for my dark humor now it seems like a hole I dug myself into

[00:16:21] [SPEAKER_00]: but it's mostly my brother that this post was about anyway and if I'm being straight up I

[00:16:27] [SPEAKER_00]: didn't want to say it straight away after the post because it seemed like a really shitty thing to

[00:16:31] [SPEAKER_00]: you've already said how much of a narcissist she is and she just said this so she can live with you

[00:16:38] [SPEAKER_00]: and keeps coming up oh yeah making out she's going for an appointment oh yeah the doctor saying oh

[00:16:42] [SPEAKER_00]: it's not long now and just stringing you along so you continue to care for her in this way

[00:16:47] [SPEAKER_00]: nurse penguin said pretty much the same to OP they said yeah pretty sure she lied about

[00:16:52] [SPEAKER_00]: her impending death to convince you to buy the house so she has somewhere to live without

[00:16:56] [SPEAKER_00]: having to pay for it time to put your foot down and tell her guests are at your discretion

[00:17:00] [SPEAKER_00]: as the homeowner and he is no longer welcome unless he pays for the privilege and respects you

[00:17:05] [SPEAKER_00]: in your rules she got me thinking about the whole cancer side of things like if she's told that basically

[00:17:11] [SPEAKER_00]: she's terminal or imagine and I know it depends on the type of cancer and and stuff like that but

[00:17:17] [SPEAKER_00]: she'd have a lot of medication I remember my dad pretty much as soon as he was told he was terminally

[00:17:23] [SPEAKER_00]: ill the amount of medication he had holy shit but again he had mesothelioma and you

[00:17:30] [SPEAKER_00]: were in the UK so I don't know but hiking says sounds like you could use a vacation

[00:17:35] [SPEAKER_00]: idea offer your brother $10,000 to buy the cabin outright go up there and relax for a week or two

[00:17:41] [SPEAKER_00]: then sell the cabin for 100k step 4 profit hope he says oh that's an absurd idea my brother

[00:17:49] [SPEAKER_00]: is insane and thinks he should somehow be able to profit from his inheritance even though dad's

[00:17:54] [SPEAKER_00]: dying wish was that the whole family could still use it together well maybe he should have

[00:17:58] [SPEAKER_00]: focused more on being a better dad not cheating every chance he got no gene says definitely tell

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_00]: your mom that if she invites him again she'll be leaving with him hope he says we're told

[00:18:09] [SPEAKER_00]: her that he needs to ask us it's funny sad to me though that my brother is too scared to ask

[00:18:14] [SPEAKER_00]: text me instead of always asking my husband because he knows I don't mince my words I guess

[00:18:19] [SPEAKER_00]: my husband is more diplomatic but maybe it's just because my brother is such a

[00:18:25] [SPEAKER_00]: sogynistic narcissist that he'd rather talk to my husband than me his sister I even told my mom

[00:18:30] [SPEAKER_00]: earlier last week that he's welcome to come if his wife and children come too which was fine

[00:18:36] [SPEAKER_00]: until the last minute my stupid brother informed mom only he was coming with his teenager because

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_00]: he doesn't have to look after him he fucked off for most of the time to go play guitar

[00:18:45] [SPEAKER_00]: anyway so op updates their post and says my mother who lives with me and my family and

[00:18:51] [SPEAKER_00]: is going through cancer supposedly dying and I already talked about my idiot brothers 40 male

[00:18:57] [SPEAKER_00]: and her plan to get him in my house for one night so he can get free babysitting from her

[00:19:02] [SPEAKER_00]: and a place to sleep after his guitar gig this weekend I told her no I didn't think so like

[00:19:08] [SPEAKER_00]: three weeks ago then my idiot brother texts my husband today asking to come because his wife

[00:19:13] [SPEAKER_00]: is going to a music festival and he has this hobby gig so he tried to invite himself over again

[00:19:18] [SPEAKER_00]: my husband responded no not possible because of our reasons like him traveling and wanting to be

[00:19:24] [SPEAKER_00]: alone after had my brother asked me which he never does because he's scared of my snarky responses

[00:19:29] [SPEAKER_00]: out of our stuff like when's the last time we're invited to your place or your summer house did

[00:19:36] [SPEAKER_00]: we invite you guys over no it's always been you inviting yourself well no more

[00:19:42] [SPEAKER_00]: and how fucking dare you think you're entitled to come anytime you please

[00:19:46] [SPEAKER_00]: or complaining that people family are using your cabin like dad wanted

[00:19:50] [SPEAKER_00]: or staying at our place so often you guys he had all of our family over at his cabin and didn't

[00:19:57] [SPEAKER_00]: even invite us for one day not that we would have gone because fuck him but the audacity

[00:20:02] [SPEAKER_00]: and self delusion not only from him but our mom too I think my idiot brother reported back

[00:20:08] [SPEAKER_00]: to our mom about our refusal but she huffed them puffed and then locked herself in our room

[00:20:13] [SPEAKER_00]: long four day before she was being so nice but I saw right through that BS and knew the ask was

[00:20:19] [SPEAKER_00]: coming I'm actually surprised my idiot brother asked today usually he waits until last minute

[00:20:25] [SPEAKER_00]: he's banned we just haven't said that outright to them because there's a lot going on and I do

[00:20:30] [SPEAKER_00]: like his wife but I wonder how long it's gonna take my idiot brother and mother to realize

[00:20:37] [SPEAKER_00]: so some people will question the OP about the extended family going to the cabin and

[00:20:41] [SPEAKER_00]: ignoring OP OP said he invited all the other siblings and their whatever's a mom not sure who

[00:20:47] [SPEAKER_00]: else just like dad's funeral when my family sat together and excluded me and my family to sit in

[00:20:52] [SPEAKER_00]: the far end corner man I'm getting angrier by the minute thinking back on all the BS and then

[00:20:59] [SPEAKER_00]: someone says so why are you letting your mother have access to you like that OP says this past

[00:21:04] [SPEAKER_00]: year I've started therapy and I've come to realize that I'm the scapegoat I've been bullied

[00:21:09] [SPEAKER_00]: and ostracized and ridiculed by my family all my life when I tried and very nearly succeeded in

[00:21:15] [SPEAKER_00]: ending my life none of them gave a damn my therapist has helped me build boundaries and

[00:21:20] [SPEAKER_00]: it's a shock to my mom and idiot brother I've built the coffin now I'm hammering the last nails in

[00:21:27] [SPEAKER_00]: another commenter says to OP if your family doesn't want to be a part of yours and you

[00:21:31] [SPEAKER_00]: make your own family OP says and I even say that myself we're planning to move far away

[00:21:38] [SPEAKER_00]: in a couple of years and I fully expect to go no contact with all my family then why not start

[00:21:43] [SPEAKER_00]: already fuck them they never give a shit about me my SO and I are just trying to figure out the

[00:21:48] [SPEAKER_00]: best way to navigate this it's clear my mom cannot and will not understand how bad the situation

[00:21:54] [SPEAKER_00]: is for me and my husband's mental health and like I've said in other comments we're dealing

[00:21:59] [SPEAKER_00]: with a lot of other stuff too I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant and there was a lot of other

[00:22:05] [SPEAKER_00]: comments and I agree with these comments as well I think it's time for mum to go to the cabin

[00:22:09] [SPEAKER_00]: with a golden child so you can live your life especially you're gonna need the room soon

[00:22:15] [SPEAKER_00]: but I'm super glad to hear that you're seeking therapy and you're getting therapy as well and

[00:22:20] [SPEAKER_00]: you're starting to get the realizations about how you was treated in the past growing up

[00:22:24] [SPEAKER_00]: you know it's not always easy to see when we come into these stories and we see comments

[00:22:28] [SPEAKER_00]: like grow a spine or whatever it's never that easy it's easy for us when we're reading like a small

[00:22:36] [SPEAKER_00]: part of someone's life but when you lived it you it's all been normalized for you it's a lot more

[00:22:41] [SPEAKER_00]: difficult to continue to set them boundaries ship her off with her golden child son if I wish you

[00:22:49] [SPEAKER_00]: and I really do wish you all the best for you and your family OP

[00:22:54] [SPEAKER_00]: much love but now I'm gonna turn this one to you guys what do you guys make of this

[00:22:59] [SPEAKER_00]: situation let me know your thoughts down in the comments below

[00:23:02] [SPEAKER_00]: and just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories

[00:23:06] [SPEAKER_00]: you'll love your support your time always means the absolute world to me

[00:23:10] [SPEAKER_00]: and I will see you in the next one take care and much love