I Cut My Fiance From My Will When He Used A Laundry Detergent I'm Allergic To r/Relationships

[00:00:01] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit Stories. And if you do love a Reddit Story, why not consider a like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys.

[00:00:18] Now today's first story comes from the Am I Overreacting subreddit and says, Am I overreacting? My fiance used a laundry detergent I might be allergic against, so I changed my will.

[00:00:30] My fiance and I recently bought a house together. We got basic things from his family as housewarming gifts. His grandmother gifted us a huge package of laundry detergent. Now, here is where the problem starts. I am and I used to be highly allergic against most laundry detergents. I'm not talking about some uncomfortable itchiness or whatever, but vomiting, diarrhea, losing my eyesight temporarily, and at the end of my consciousness.

[00:00:57] I've been hospitalized for this multiple times already. We are using two brands. I am not allergic against. He keeps complaining that they don't smell that good. Which might be true. They aren't really fragrant and I know he used to drown his clothes in fabric softener to make them smell nice.

[00:01:15] I offer to slowly start trying new laundry detergents because he keeps complaining about those two uneasily accessible in his home country, but definitely not in the foreseeable future.

[00:01:26] As I am eight months pregnant and very afraid of the possible consequences, we still have more than enough of the safe ones.

[00:01:34] He agreed and I thought the topic was done. But then his brother gifted us baby clothes. My fiance kept commenting how good they smelled and how badly he wants our clothes to smell like this.

[00:01:44] I sorted through them and after I was around halfway done, I noticed that I felt kind of off. My hands felt weird. My body felt wrong. So I washed every part that touched those clothes and refused to touch them without gloves.

[00:01:57] My fiance bought them for me. So he definitely knows that I'm allergic against some detergents.

[00:02:03] Well, he decided to use the gifted laundry detergent on our towels. I didn't notice it until I started folding them and putting them away. My hands started to get hot and kind of numb and itchy.

[00:02:15] At first I was afraid that I am now allergic against one of the safe ones until I noticed the gifted one was opened and kind of shoved in a corner.

[00:02:23] Our other two are also open and readily available. I just don't get it.

[00:02:28] I texted him and asked if he used the gifted laundry detergent for anything else. He said yes, what's the big deal?

[00:02:35] I told him that's not funny and he's potentially playing with the life of our unborn son and mine and why he thought now of all times is the right time to test my allergy again.

[00:02:45] He called me a drama queen and ignored me after.

[00:02:49] So, I changed my will. My fiance gets nothing now. Neither my part of the house nor my other assets. Everything goes to my son. With my family as trustees until he is of age.

[00:03:01] If something were to happen to both my son and me, my cousins will be the sole inheritors.

[00:03:06] My fiance was originally meant to be the trustee with different guidelines to make my son's life and his pretty comfortable.

[00:03:12] I trashed the old will, sent the new version to my lawyer to make him look over it and plan to get to a notary as soon as possible.

[00:03:20] Now, my first thoughts on this is like if you're at that point where you're changing the will and you don't want him to have any part of it because you don't trust him,

[00:03:27] why are you even continuing in the relationship?

[00:03:30] I'm not sure if that sounds too extreme to say already, but the fact that he's calling you a drama queen when he knows how bad your allergies are,

[00:03:38] you being pregnant as well is just wild.

[00:03:43] And I think it's certainly something to consider seeing as you're going to be getting married at some point in the future

[00:03:48] and the lack of trust there is just screaming at me, but...

[00:03:52] I'd rather be sewing, says. Are you sure you want to marry this person?

[00:03:56] Opie says, honestly, I'm not quite sure at the moment.

[00:03:59] He changed completely after I got pregnant.

[00:04:01] He used to take safe sheets and blankets to friends so I could sleep there without worrying.

[00:04:06] Opie says, then he will probably get worse after birth.

[00:04:10] You really want to have that guy washing your sheets while you're recovering from giving birth?

[00:04:14] What would happen if your son inherits your allergy?

[00:04:17] Opie says, I don't even want to imagine that.

[00:04:20] Some of my cousins are allergic too.

[00:04:23] Thankfully, only rashes and not the other things.

[00:04:25] But if our son and his tiny body would have the same reaction?

[00:04:29] Oh man, I guess I have to find a way out of this mess.

[00:04:32] Yes. Beneficial Bat says, Opie is the bar so low that you'd put yourself in danger because it is an inconvenience to fiancé.

[00:04:39] My mother is highly allergic to certain fragrances in detergents.

[00:04:43] My father didn't know slash forgot when he picked one up.

[00:04:46] Used it, she had a bad reaction.

[00:04:49] He felt bad and gave the detergent away, then went and got something she wasn't allergic to.

[00:04:53] His response was to fix it so his wife was not hurting.

[00:04:56] Yours is treating you as an inconvenience for something as little as laundry soap.

[00:05:01] Fiancé won't put in the effort to not do something that hurts you.

[00:05:04] Does grandma know you are allergic?

[00:05:06] Opie responds saying she doesn't.

[00:05:08] If she would have known, she probably wouldn't have given it to us.

[00:05:11] She gave us lots of cleaning stuff in general, so laundry detergent fits right in.

[00:05:15] His mother knows though.

[00:05:17] I don't think she knows exactly what I'm not allergic against and figured her son would handle it.

[00:05:22] If it's something harmful to me.

[00:05:23] The home of Listic says, wait, what?

[00:05:25] Help me understand your thinking here.

[00:05:28] Your fiancé is purposely triggering your allergic reactions while you were pregnant.

[00:05:32] You asked him about it and he called you dramatic and is now ignoring you.

[00:05:36] Your response is to change your will.

[00:05:38] That makes me think, you think he's trying to kill you, right?

[00:05:41] You don't want him to benefit from your death, but you are staying with him.

[00:05:45] If you feel your health and the health of your child are at risk, is there somewhere else you can stay?

[00:05:50] Can you talk to your doctor?

[00:05:52] Have your doctor talk with your fiancé?

[00:05:54] Do you even trust him with your health and safety?

[00:05:56] If not, I don't see this leading to a happy ending.

[00:05:59] Will or no will?

[00:06:01] It seems like there are a lot of missing steps between what happened and your response.

[00:06:06] Opie says,

[00:06:07] I am not thinking he is trying to kill me.

[00:06:09] I'd set up my will before childbirth, as we aren't married and we won't be before our son is born.

[00:06:14] I'm afraid of me dying during childbirth and I wanted to make sure that both of them would have a comfortable life.

[00:06:20] I just can't trust him to take care of that amount of assets.

[00:06:23] If he so easily disregards my slash our health, I still make sure my son will get taken care of and they can keep living in this house,

[00:06:31] but he won't be able to decide that asset X is to be sold so they can move wherever.

[00:06:37] He would have to involve my family because he has shown me that he doesn't have the best interest for our son at heart.

[00:06:42] If that makes any sense and isn't just my pregnant interpretation of things that occurred.

[00:06:47] Danu says,

[00:06:49] Even if he isn't trying to kill you, he doesn't care if he hurts you.

[00:06:51] That alone should make you end the relationship.

[00:06:54] Opie says,

[00:06:55] I guess.

[00:06:56] It's just been such a switch up from him.

[00:06:58] He used to be my best friend and would have done anything to keep me from bodily harm and now he did this.

[00:07:04] I guess I just can't come to terms with it because I keep thinking,

[00:07:07] maybe it's because he hasn't seen me hospitalized for it yet and thinks I'm just dramatic.

[00:07:11] He used to take this allergy so serious though.

[00:07:14] I don't know what changed, except me getting pregnant.

[00:07:18] So Opie comes back in with her update and says,

[00:07:21] Hey, it's been a while and I wanted to give you all an update.

[00:07:24] Honestly, a lot happened.

[00:07:26] I had a rather uneventful conversation with him after he returned home.

[00:07:30] He justified his usage of the laundry detergent with the presence of cleaning towels in between the normal towels.

[00:07:36] I asked him how that matters.

[00:07:38] Well, apparently it's because I wasn't going to dry myself with those.

[00:07:42] I wasn't satisfied with that answer and asked about the normal towels.

[00:07:46] As there were only two for cleaning and over 10 normal ones and how the smell of cleaning towels is relevant.

[00:07:52] Because like he said, they are for cleaning.

[00:07:54] He didn't answer and started ignoring me.

[00:07:57] That was answer enough for me though.

[00:07:59] I knew it was BS, but I don't know.

[00:08:01] I'd kind of hoped for a better excuse.

[00:08:04] I was kind of withdrawn from him at this point and decided to watch his behavior towards me to figure out what was going on.

[00:08:11] I thought that I might get an answer somehow, somewhere, because he was my best friend and I just didn't want to believe that I mattered that little to him.

[00:08:19] The next incident happened soon after though.

[00:08:21] I was carrying a rather heavy drawer.

[00:08:24] I had to deep clean it.

[00:08:25] Mailworms escaped the enclosure.

[00:08:27] I am using them as food for my spider.

[00:08:30] As the drawer was so heavy, I struggled a lot, but he was busy working on some shelf.

[00:08:35] I asked him if he could help me, but he didn't react.

[00:08:38] So I asked him where I should put the drawer, as he was sitting in front of the shelf thingy where it belongs.

[00:08:43] He told me to just put it on the floor, so I did.

[00:08:46] What I didn't see in time though was my karcher.

[00:08:49] I put the drawer on the vacuum tube.

[00:08:52] Nothing broke, and even if it's mine, he wasn't using it at the moment or anything.

[00:08:56] It was just laying in the middle of the room.

[00:08:58] He lost his shit.

[00:09:00] He asked me if I can't even use my one brain cell and other stuff implying I am dumb.

[00:09:06] That hurt, more than I would like to admit.

[00:09:09] I started silently crying and went to the living room.

[00:09:12] He followed me quite some time later, got upset with me because I was still sad and said it was just a joke.

[00:09:17] I told him I didn't find it funny, and it hurt me.

[00:09:20] If he could just apologize, please.

[00:09:23] Spoiler, he did not.

[00:09:25] Just said it was a joke and we haven't had an argument before.

[00:09:27] So he didn't say it out of spite, but in a joking manner.

[00:09:30] I wish I could say it stopped there, but I fell and had mild cramps plus a bloody knee.

[00:09:36] I called him on the phone because I didn't have any friends in this country yet,

[00:09:40] and he was the only one available.

[00:09:41] Plus, I knew his boss would let him go, as he is a very kind man,

[00:09:45] and he was supposed to end his workday 30 minutes from then anyway.

[00:09:49] That's what he had told me at least.

[00:09:50] I called him.

[00:09:51] He didn't pick up.

[00:09:52] I texted him, and he didn't read my messages.

[00:09:55] He came home an hour late from work.

[00:09:57] He wasn't at work.

[00:09:58] He was visiting a friend whom he gave the laundry detergent to.

[00:10:02] He helped me, but even a stranger would have been kinder,

[00:10:05] and he told me to just lay down, as I am too dumb to walk,

[00:10:09] endangering our son's life.

[00:10:11] I just wanted to take a nap and lay down on the couch,

[00:10:14] as it's way closer than the bedroom.

[00:10:16] He started to vacuum the house.

[00:10:18] I did it yesterday, plus mopped the floor, so there wasn't a lot.

[00:10:21] But he spent 40 plus minutes vacuuming right next to me,

[00:10:24] walking in circles, cleaning the same spots over and over,

[00:10:28] mumbling how I didn't clean today, and how I'm such a messy person.

[00:10:32] Yes, I do like to leave my shirt occasionally on the chair,

[00:10:35] but I've cleaned every day, since I've been on maternity leave and before that too.

[00:10:40] I'd be comfortable with visitors at any given hour.

[00:10:43] After he finished vacuuming, he asked me about some mopped parts.

[00:10:46] His grandmother put in our house weeks ago, asking me what I am doing with them.

[00:10:51] I still don't understand what he meant by that.

[00:10:53] I told him his grandma put them next to the vacuum cleaner.

[00:10:56] So much too, I never clean and can't do anything right.

[00:11:00] If he would have ever decided to vacuum in the last weeks,

[00:11:03] he would have noticed them.

[00:11:04] But he decided to vacuum while I was doing badly and just needed a nap.

[00:11:09] He just doesn't like me anymore.

[00:11:11] I'm heartbroken to say that, but he truly doesn't.

[00:11:14] At least our cat and dog have picked up on that.

[00:11:17] Our cat keeps his distance from him now,

[00:11:19] doesn't want to be a pet and bites and scratches him when he tries to cuddle with him.

[00:11:24] My beloved dog keeps himself between me and him,

[00:11:28] follows me around and tries to avoid him.

[00:11:30] While he still wags his tail when he comes home, it's just not the same.

[00:11:34] I don't know how to describe it, but I don't recognize him anymore.

[00:11:38] The animals can feel his anger too.

[00:11:40] He looks at me with such contempt and he is very mean towards me.

[00:11:44] I thought he would be my forever, but he won't be.

[00:11:47] He's punching our walls.

[00:11:49] He's hiding his phone.

[00:11:50] I'm sad and tired.

[00:11:51] I don't even have the energy to go through his phone,

[00:11:54] because even if there would be answers to his behavior,

[00:11:57] I just don't care anymore.

[00:11:58] I'm just sad.

[00:12:00] I gave him the engagement ring back.

[00:12:02] He didn't seem to care.

[00:12:03] My car's battery doesn't work at the moment,

[00:12:06] so I have to figure that out.

[00:12:08] As some of you guessed, I am indeed from Germany.

[00:12:10] Well, he is from a neighboring country.

[00:12:12] I'm seven hours from my family and about three hours from the border,

[00:12:16] by car, so I don't have to fly, luckily.

[00:12:19] I'm sleeping in the guest room on a couch for the time being.

[00:12:22] My ex seems very content with that.

[00:12:24] Now he's just on his phone constantly and leaves me be, for the most part.

[00:12:28] Thank you for all your input, kind words, and DMs.

[00:12:31] For the people who claim this is fake, believe me, I wish it was.

[00:12:36] Absolutely get yourself out of that position, ASAP.

[00:12:39] Call family, even if they are seven hours away.

[00:12:42] I could tell you now, if a family member told me what you just told me,

[00:12:45] it doesn't matter how long I would drive to have to come pick you up.

[00:12:49] So get in touch with your family and tell them what's going on and get out of there.

[00:12:52] That guy is wanting to hurt.

[00:12:54] He's wanting to punish you.

[00:12:55] And it sounds like it's escalating very, very quickly.

[00:12:59] And I just find it a coincidence with the Hoover thing and all this stuff going on

[00:13:03] and the testing your allergies.

[00:13:05] That is quite a coincidence now.

[00:13:07] Your car battery doesn't work.

[00:13:09] But what do you guys make of this situation?

[00:13:12] Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:13:15] And let's move on to another story.

[00:13:18] Story.

[00:13:19] Now, our next story comes from the Off My Chest subreddit from Messed Up Wife,

[00:13:24] who says,

[00:13:24] I completely messed up and may have lost my husband.

[00:13:28] Me, 34 female, and my husband, 35 male.

[00:13:31] Been married for five years and together for nine.

[00:13:34] From the start, I totally felt like I won the boyfriend slash husband lottery

[00:13:39] because he's definitely out of my league.

[00:13:41] He's handsome, very fit and athletic.

[00:13:44] Wrestling and boxing and jiu-jitsu.

[00:13:46] And super charming.

[00:13:48] I see the way women look at him and I'm very aware of how attractive he is.

[00:13:53] My husband has never given me any reason to think he has been unfaithful.

[00:13:57] He's a wonderful provider and father to our two-year-old son.

[00:14:01] However, about six weeks there was a change in his routine that made me suspicious.

[00:14:05] My husband is an engineer.

[00:14:07] Doesn't work crazy long hours but does bring work home usually.

[00:14:11] I work part-time from home.

[00:14:13] Two or three days a week.

[00:14:15] We have a spare bedroom that my husband made into a beautiful office.

[00:14:19] Usually when my husband comes from work, I am done working by the time he comes home.

[00:14:24] He usually eats something then finishes up some work or he goes and works out.

[00:14:28] However, I do admit kind of pestering him for things while he is working or exercising.

[00:14:33] If he can reach something for me, move a box, take the trash out.

[00:14:37] Or our son wants to see him and play or be read to.

[00:14:40] I admit that it's probably very distracting but never has indicated to me that it bothered him.

[00:14:46] So, about six weeks ago, my husband started to leave for work very early.

[00:14:51] He always woke up first, made breakfast and coffee, fed our son and then he would leave when I would wake up.

[00:14:58] But lately, he would leave for work about an hour earlier.

[00:15:01] He would make coffee still but would leave before our son got up.

[00:15:04] My stupid friends told me he was probably cheating so they convinced me to sneak into his phone.

[00:15:11] I looked at his phone while he was in the shower.

[00:15:13] He doesn't keep it locked.

[00:15:15] I found nothing.

[00:15:16] No texts or phone calls but I did share the location of his phone to mine.

[00:15:20] Next morning, he leaves earlier as usual and I track his phone.

[00:15:25] Turns out he was going to a hotel.

[00:15:27] I am livid.

[00:15:29] I ask my neighbor to watch our son for me and head to the hotel to try and confront him.

[00:15:33] When I get to the parking lot, I can kind of see on my phone that he is on the direction of this little restaurant associated with the hotel.

[00:15:40] It was a little diner and that's where I found my husband.

[00:15:43] He was in a booth by himself with his laptop doing work and having breakfast.

[00:15:48] My husband spots me and asks what I'm doing there.

[00:15:50] I felt so relieved and told my husband my suspicions and what my friends told me.

[00:15:55] My husband hates my friends.

[00:15:57] I saw how disappointed he looked.

[00:16:00] He didn't say much to me except,

[00:16:02] I can't believe you thought I would do that and that you would trust your dumb ass friends over me.

[00:16:07] He ended up going to work and I went home and tried to be the best wife ever.

[00:16:12] I even made dinner for him which I never do because he is a way better cook.

[00:16:16] I don't know what to do though.

[00:16:18] My husband has been very distant the last few days and slept in the guest room past three nights which totally broke me.

[00:16:25] And today I found out my husband would not come home today.

[00:16:28] He's staying with a friend.

[00:16:30] I'm totally panicking now.

[00:16:32] How can I fix this Reddit?

[00:16:34] Lynn says to the OP,

[00:16:35] Why wouldn't you just ask why he was leaving early?

[00:16:38] Brad Panda Party says,

[00:16:39] Yawn, OP.

[00:16:41] You're up early, what's up?

[00:16:43] Husband says,

[00:16:44] Oh, I'm kind of tired of cooking and found this diner I like and do some work at.

[00:16:48] Done.

[00:16:49] So cool says,

[00:16:50] I think from your post it's clear you are self-conscious.

[00:16:53] You even say he's out of your league.

[00:16:55] I think you need to confess that the suspicions were not a notion that he wasn't trustworthy,

[00:16:59] but a failing on your own self-worth.

[00:17:03] An apology that is,

[00:17:04] I should have trusted or I had no reason to doubt,

[00:17:07] won't hold any water,

[00:17:09] as that's exactly what you did.

[00:17:10] You need to tell him that after internalizing,

[00:17:13] you failed him and not him having a problem.

[00:17:16] As others said, of course,

[00:17:18] he could have communicated more.

[00:17:20] But regardless of communication,

[00:17:22] she didn't have his trust.

[00:17:24] Communication isn't necessary to say,

[00:17:26] I'm not cheating.

[00:17:28] Sure, he could have communicated to make his life better and relationship better,

[00:17:31] but that has nothing to do with OP,

[00:17:33] not trusting and being suspicious.

[00:17:36] You have to lay your cards out and be vulnerable to him and prove to him that this is your shortcoming,

[00:17:41] and not just a,

[00:17:42] I made a bad decision in the moment.

[00:17:44] It's a,

[00:17:45] I have to give myself more self-worth,

[00:17:47] and I instead turned it on you.

[00:17:50] Call Me Mama T says,

[00:17:51] why would you listen to your friends instead of asking your husband?

[00:17:54] Learn how to talk to each other.

[00:17:56] He's probably pissed because,

[00:17:58] now he knows that your friend group thinks he's a cheater.

[00:18:00] How would you feel if the tables were turned?

[00:18:03] Not good,

[00:18:04] I guarantee you.

[00:18:05] You have some groveling to do.

[00:18:07] Grimhole says,

[00:18:09] why would you listen to your friends instead of asking your husband?

[00:18:12] I'll start out the same way as that last comment.

[00:18:14] Because realistically,

[00:18:15] most people in real life give the same advice they give on Reddit.

[00:18:18] Mistrust and projection of fear and trauma tends to catch easily.

[00:18:22] I think after finding nothing in his phone,

[00:18:24] you owed him a conversation.

[00:18:26] You had already technically proven to yourself he was innocent,

[00:18:29] all very, very good at hiding it.

[00:18:32] Opie said in the same post,

[00:18:33] I just heard from my husband through text.

[00:18:35] He changed his mind and will come home tonight.

[00:18:38] Thank God.

[00:18:39] He said the part that he was upset the most was

[00:18:41] that I told my friend about the issue instead of talking to him.

[00:18:45] I kind of know how much this would bother him

[00:18:47] because he always makes comments about how much he dislikes

[00:18:49] when people talk about their spouses negatively.

[00:18:52] So Reddit,

[00:18:53] I'm going to apologize profusely.

[00:18:55] I know I messed up,

[00:18:56] but I need to save this.

[00:18:59] Opie came into the post a couple of hours later

[00:19:01] and says he's coming home in a few hours.

[00:19:03] He says he doesn't have to do any work when he comes home.

[00:19:06] Yay!

[00:19:06] And I'm not really sure how to approach it.

[00:19:09] Do I let him talk to me?

[00:19:10] Do I just apologize and tell him I was worried about losing him?

[00:19:14] I'm not sure what to do about my friends.

[00:19:16] I've known these girls since elementary school

[00:19:18] and we're doing a girls trip to Nashville in like a month.

[00:19:21] I haven't told him what happened,

[00:19:23] but I haven't been really in the mood to talk on the group text.

[00:19:26] But for some context,

[00:19:28] yes, I am the only one out of all of them who is married.

[00:19:32] Clockateer says,

[00:19:33] You have not mentioned dumping your friends

[00:19:35] who almost sabotaged your marriage.

[00:19:39] Perfinator says,

[00:19:40] I wouldn't take advice on my marriage from friends that aren't married.

[00:19:43] I would cut that out completely.

[00:19:45] You don't have to drop the friends,

[00:19:46] but keep your marriage off limits.

[00:19:49] Gothic Gingerbread says,

[00:19:50] At bare minimum,

[00:19:51] Opie needs to back away from those friends

[00:19:53] and skip the trip to Nashville.

[00:19:55] So then Opie came in with her update

[00:19:57] and says,

[00:19:57] Good morning Reddit.

[00:19:58] Last night went well I think.

[00:20:00] I was rehearsing all day what I wanted to say to him,

[00:20:03] but when he came home I just broke down.

[00:20:05] I cried and my husband just hugged me.

[00:20:07] He told me that we can talk later

[00:20:09] after we put our boy to bed.

[00:20:11] After our son went to sleep,

[00:20:13] that's when we talked.

[00:20:14] To be fair to my husband,

[00:20:15] he was telling me the night before

[00:20:16] that he was leaving early for work

[00:20:18] and was really only doing that

[00:20:20] if I wasn't working the next day.

[00:20:22] I apologized every other sentence,

[00:20:24] but I asked him what I could do

[00:20:26] to make things easier on him.

[00:20:27] How could I help?

[00:20:28] If he feels safe at that diner,

[00:20:30] how could I do that at home?

[00:20:32] So I told him that I was going to start

[00:20:34] waking up with him in the morning.

[00:20:35] I can get our son up and dressed

[00:20:37] and get both him and my husband fed.

[00:20:39] I told him he can even work in the morning

[00:20:41] and I will stay out of the way too.

[00:20:43] I think he really appreciated that

[00:20:45] because he kind of choked up and said,

[00:20:46] that would be really nice.

[00:20:48] We slept together too.

[00:20:51] Ask my friends,

[00:20:52] there is a backstory there.

[00:20:53] My husband didn't say never talk or see them,

[00:20:56] but I'm not going on the trip

[00:20:57] and I'm definitely going to distance myself from them.

[00:21:01] Pancake Kid on the back of that one says,

[00:21:03] lesson learned OP.

[00:21:04] I hope it works out.

[00:21:05] You seem like a nice lady

[00:21:07] who just needs to mature and get some confidence.

[00:21:09] Just remember next time a friend

[00:21:11] says something stupid,

[00:21:13] always remember who would be rooting for you.

[00:21:15] Who wants you to succeed?

[00:21:17] Who wants you happy?

[00:21:19] Seems to me your husband through his actions has proven

[00:21:21] he wants the best for you and your son.

[00:21:24] OP comes in with what they title their final update

[00:21:27] and says,

[00:21:27] hi Reddit,

[00:21:28] this will probably be my final update.

[00:21:30] I put it here,

[00:21:31] makes it easier to find.

[00:21:33] My other updates are scattered in the comments.

[00:21:35] So definitely having one of those epiphany moments.

[00:21:38] Like I've been asleep the past few years

[00:21:40] and now I'm awake and aware.

[00:21:42] I woke up with my husband and my son.

[00:21:44] Lazy Sunday feelings.

[00:21:46] Both of my boys at the kitchen table

[00:21:48] while I made breakfast and fed them both.

[00:21:50] All of a sudden,

[00:21:51] I'm just hyper aware of everything in the moment.

[00:21:53] My husband and son being silly.

[00:21:56] My husband tickling me and pranking me.

[00:21:58] My son and my husband chasing me around the kitchen.

[00:22:01] I just about peed my pants

[00:22:02] when my husband yelled,

[00:22:03] get mom!

[00:22:04] And they both started to chase me around the kitchen.

[00:22:07] I know it won't be like this every day,

[00:22:09] but for the first time,

[00:22:10] I was very aware of how much power I have

[00:22:12] to make my home that safe and happy place.

[00:22:15] A lot of people were messaging me about my friends.

[00:22:18] I haven't spoken to them since everything happened

[00:22:20] and quite frankly,

[00:22:21] I'm terrified of anyone finding out what happened.

[00:22:24] But when me and my husband first started dating,

[00:22:27] they talked very badly about him

[00:22:29] and some of what they said

[00:22:30] made it back to my husband from a mutual friend.

[00:22:33] It always stayed cordial with them,

[00:22:35] but there was one day,

[00:22:36] years ago,

[00:22:37] my friends were over for wine at my home.

[00:22:39] My friend was in the middle of a story

[00:22:41] and my husband had just walked in the house from work.

[00:22:43] She said,

[00:22:44] can you go somewhere else?

[00:22:45] I'm telling a story.

[00:22:47] And she basically yelled it at him.

[00:22:49] She can be obnoxiously loud.

[00:22:51] My husband absolutely flipped out on her.

[00:22:53] He walked right up to her,

[00:22:54] got in her face and yelled,

[00:22:56] who the fuck do you think you are?

[00:22:57] You're in my fucking house.

[00:22:59] You go somewhere else.

[00:23:00] My husband has raised his voice at me like once ever.

[00:23:03] So I was in shock to see my husband do that.

[00:23:07] Wine night was over to say the least.

[00:23:09] But ever since that moment,

[00:23:11] my husband was very openly hostile towards my friends.

[00:23:14] Reflecting on everything that's kind of happened,

[00:23:16] I feel very ashamed.

[00:23:18] I think I dodged a huge bullet

[00:23:20] and I hate how I've been acting,

[00:23:22] contributing so little to our marriage.

[00:23:24] Amazing how a mundane Sunday morning

[00:23:27] can at the same time be the best thing ever.

[00:23:29] My husband forgave me.

[00:23:30] I just now need to try and forgive myself.

[00:23:33] Thank you Reddit.

[00:23:34] OK Complaint says to OP,

[00:23:36] I like your husband.

[00:23:38] He's assertive and showed to this obnoxious drunk woman,

[00:23:40] aka friend, her place.

[00:23:43] Drinking is never conducive to anything good.

[00:23:46] This is my own epiphany recently.

[00:23:48] Enjoy and take care of your family.

[00:23:50] Protect them from ill-wishing and jealous,

[00:23:52] trashy people whom you call his friends.

[00:23:55] Unlucky Customer says he forgave this time.

[00:23:58] You may be out of forgiveness

[00:23:59] if you ever mention your friends again.

[00:24:01] He gave you a massive gift.

[00:24:03] Don't throw it away with losers in your life.

[00:24:06] Do better, be better, choose wisely.

[00:24:10] But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:24:13] What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:24:16] Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:24:20] Now just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart

[00:24:22] for getting involved in today's stories.

[00:24:25] Your love, your support, your time

[00:24:26] always means the absolute world to me.

[00:24:29] Thank you so, so much.

[00:24:30] And hopefully I'll see you in the next one.

[00:24:33] Take care and much love.

[00:24:36] Wake up.

[00:24:37] Wake up.

[00:24:37] Get up.

[00:24:38] Stretch my legs.

[00:24:40] Eat some breakfast.

[00:24:44] Brush my teeth up.

[00:24:46] Watch my face.

[00:24:48] Don't mind.

[00:24:49] Clothes on.

[00:24:50] Start my day.

[00:24:52] Wake up.