I Called The Police On My Sister After She Snuck Shellfish Into My Food r/Relationships

[00:00:16] [SPEAKER_00]: Mark Narrations

[00:00:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit Stories.

[00:00:34] [SPEAKER_01]: And if you do love a Reddit Story why not consider hitting that like, subscribe and maybe that notification bell too.

[00:00:40] [SPEAKER_01]: And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys.

[00:00:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Now today's first story comes from Rude Disaster 1658 from the Am I The Arsehole Here subreddit and says

[00:00:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Am I the arsehole here for calling the cops on my sister after she snuck shellfish in my food?

[00:00:58] [SPEAKER_01]: I've posted this in other subs but it keeps getting removed so I'll try one last time.

[00:01:04] [SPEAKER_01]: I, 21F and my sister 23F have never had any issues until last week.

[00:01:11] [SPEAKER_01]: She and her husband, 23M had invited me over for lunch which is normal for us.

[00:01:17] [SPEAKER_01]: I have a severe shellfish allergy, even touching it makes me extremely itchy.

[00:01:22] [SPEAKER_01]: My sister is completely aware of this and has been since we were children.

[00:01:26] [SPEAKER_01]: When I got to their house she said that the food was already finished and in the fridge.

[00:01:31] [SPEAKER_01]: She claimed that it was just a tuna pasta, yes I can eat tuna and many other fish, just nothing with a shell.

[00:01:39] [SPEAKER_01]: After she finished cleaning up we had a short conversation about what's been happening in our lives since it had been a while since we'd seen each other.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I got this strange feeling from her but just brushed it off as I was extremely tired that day.

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_01]: She grabbed the food out of the fridge and served it for me, giving me a small bowl in case I don't like it.

[00:02:00] [SPEAKER_01]: I couldn't smell much of it and from what I could smell I just assumed it was fish but when I took a bite I almost immediately felt my throat burning.

[00:02:10] [SPEAKER_01]: I was coughing and grabbing at my throat and her husband kept asking me if I was choking.

[00:02:15] [SPEAKER_01]: My sister turned to me panicking and said I thought you were exaggerating.

[00:02:19] [SPEAKER_01]: An ambulance was called and I was rushed to the hospital.

[00:02:22] [SPEAKER_01]: I was thankfully okay but they had made me stay to be monitored for the next two days.

[00:02:27] [SPEAKER_01]: My sister and brother in law had tried to visit me but I told her to get out.

[00:02:32] [SPEAKER_01]: She kept apologizing and refusing to leave.

[00:02:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I told her that I'd be calling the police on her for what she had done as it's literally attempted murder and she lost it.

[00:02:41] [SPEAKER_01]: She kept screaming at me, I know you're faking this, you always act like you're allergic to shellfish so I wanted to test you.

[00:02:48] [SPEAKER_01]: I've been pressing the call button for the nurse but they heard her regardless and had asked me if I wanted them removed and I said yes.

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_01]: I explained the whole situation to her and the hospital security eventually decided that with the help of the nurse and security guards I'd file a report against her.

[00:03:05] [SPEAKER_01]: My mother is saying I'm overreacting and I should have just cut contact but I don't know anymore.

[00:03:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Also, when I was a young child my sister had witnessed me have a severe reaction and went to the hospital where I underwent treatment.

[00:03:19] [SPEAKER_01]: She was also there when I informed I had a shellfish allergy.

[00:03:23] [SPEAKER_01]: You may be wondering why I never had an epi-pen on me and that's because I didn't feel the need to as she was my sister.

[00:03:30] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm I the arsehole.

[00:03:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Edit I'm not in America, my country has free healthcare so I can't make her pay any medical bills for me.

[00:03:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Edit I'm sick of people who refuse to read and continue to blame me for not having an epi-pen and I was never able to get one.

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I was never able to get a prescription due to doctors refusing like what has happened to many people in the comments too.

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_01]: This post wasn't about the pen so if you come here to mention it you'll be blocked.

[00:03:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Now we've had these tests posts before and I can never understand the logic.

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_01]: What are they actually trying to get out of this by testing your allergy?

[00:04:05] [SPEAKER_01]: What I always find absolutely wild is the comments below these.

[00:04:10] [SPEAKER_01]: There's always people who have been tested for these allergies as well by their own families.

[00:04:16] [SPEAKER_01]: There's one comment who said they've even had strangers like baristas at coffee shops who try this sort of stuff.

[00:04:23] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean that sounds like a quick way to get yourself fired but holy shit.

[00:04:26] [SPEAKER_01]: And the mum in this post as well.

[00:04:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Like you just sent your sister to hospital with something that was life threatening.

[00:04:34] [SPEAKER_01]: The mum's just like oh you're totally overreacting here I mean what the hell no she isn't.

[00:04:40] [SPEAKER_01]: But MelodicSale says I wonder if the sister's husband was the person that turned his wife against the OP.

[00:04:45] [SPEAKER_01]: The sisters grew up together and she witnessed her allergic reactions.

[00:04:49] [SPEAKER_01]: She knew that the sister wasn't faking.

[00:04:51] [SPEAKER_01]: I wonder if the brother-in-law doesn't like the OP.

[00:04:54] [SPEAKER_01]: OP says my sister and I never had many obvious problems but I was very aware she thought she was better than me

[00:05:00] [SPEAKER_01]: due to my mother treating her better than me.

[00:05:03] [SPEAKER_01]: I was the one who introduced brother-in-law to my sister.

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_01]: We were friends however he never had any idea about my allergy.

[00:05:11] [SPEAKER_01]: AnxiousCustard says that's so weird.

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Why would she care that much about proving something that quite literally doesn't affect her life at all?

[00:05:19] [SPEAKER_01]: She's got problems.

[00:05:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Samuel says some golden children have a need to be in control and to be in the center of attention.

[00:05:27] [SPEAKER_01]: OP's allergy is outside of her control and gives OP some attention.

[00:05:32] [SPEAKER_01]: A waiter taking longer to confirm and explain an order for example

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_01]: and those kind of people cannot stand others getting more attention than them.

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_01]: So they try and create scenarios where they are in control or expose the other for faking it.

[00:05:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Consequences, the victim being harmed ending up dead are something they do not care about.

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_01]: This is me, me, me.

[00:05:54] [SPEAKER_01]: So reporting this is actually the only chance OP has to teach this person actions do have consequences.

[00:06:02] [SPEAKER_01]: So OP does have an update and says update.

[00:06:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Just like to say all of you who are blaming me for not having an EpiPen make absolute zero sense.

[00:06:11] [SPEAKER_01]: 1. Not everyone can afford one, even if you have free healthcare because it's not 100% covered.

[00:06:17] [SPEAKER_01]: 2. Not everyone with an allergy carries an EpiPen.

[00:06:20] [SPEAKER_01]: 3. She was my sister.

[00:06:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Why would I feel the need to bring an EpiPen to her house for a homemade lunch?

[00:06:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Obviously now I know to save up for one.

[00:06:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, this morning I went to the police station and with the help of the nurse who overheard everything filed a report.

[00:06:35] [SPEAKER_01]: I wanted to know what I could do and they said that they could realistically only give me a temporary protective order

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_01]: while we wait for the court date where the judge will decide what's best.

[00:06:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, the hospital has cameras so I'll ask the hospital if that can be used as evidence in court.

[00:06:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Or even with the police if they still need to write a statement.

[00:06:54] [SPEAKER_01]: Other than that, almost fully recovered and back to work tomorrow.

[00:06:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I know it's a short update but that's all I've got for you guys.

[00:07:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Also, the only reason I'm updating this so soon is because I originally posted this in another sub a few days ago.

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Kopey then edited and said I'm not American, I do not live in America.

[00:07:11] [SPEAKER_01]: The top comments on that one said,

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Wow, what the fuck is wrong with your sister?

[00:07:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Obviously not the arsehole.

[00:07:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Playing with someone's lives for shits and giggles is just as wrong as it gets.

[00:07:21] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't blame you for pressing charges at all.

[00:07:23] [SPEAKER_01]: AMW says,

[00:07:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that's weird as hell to be playing with someone's life like that.

[00:07:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Vaa says,

[00:07:28] [SPEAKER_01]: I know you're faking, I just wanted to test you.

[00:07:31] [SPEAKER_01]: She screams,

[00:07:32] [SPEAKER_01]: After having already seen you spend multiple days in the hospital from a previous incident.

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Your sister needs to either be in jail or in a mental ward.

[00:07:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Her cognitive function is seriously messed up.

[00:07:43] [SPEAKER_01]: And with these stories, I always kind of want to know what happened in the past.

[00:07:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Obviously I'm not excusing it or trying to blame Kopey in any way, shape or form.

[00:07:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I just want to know what that relationship was like in the past.

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Was there any other signs of it going down this road?

[00:07:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Any other signs of jealousy from the sister?

[00:08:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Because it was going in my head that maybe she's got a tension from her allergy in the past.

[00:08:06] [SPEAKER_01]: And then the sister just sat there thinking,

[00:08:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Alright, let's test this, shall we?

[00:08:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Which I know is absolute crazy thinking.

[00:08:12] [SPEAKER_01]: But what's the alternatives?

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:08:18] [SPEAKER_01]: And let's move on to another story.

[00:08:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Now our next story comes from the Relationship Advice subreddit.

[00:08:26] [SPEAKER_01]: From Drew who says,

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_01]: My wife wants a separation.

[00:08:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Is there ever coming back from a trial separation?

[00:08:33] [SPEAKER_01]: My 39 male, wife 34 female have been together for almost 8 years, married for 4.

[00:08:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Without going into a ton of background,

[00:08:42] [SPEAKER_01]: she has lost a lot of family recently from either death or estrangement.

[00:08:46] [SPEAKER_01]: She has always felt that she has no family to turn to and is all alone.

[00:08:49] [SPEAKER_01]: We moved states to be able to afford a house in 2021,

[00:08:53] [SPEAKER_01]: and she hates it here since we haven't really made any friends

[00:08:56] [SPEAKER_01]: and her workplace is extremely toxic adding to her stress.

[00:09:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Before we met she wandered and was impulsive and would move on a whim.

[00:09:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Now she feels stuck in our tiny house and living situation.

[00:09:08] [SPEAKER_01]: She has expressed these feelings often and while I fully support her well-being,

[00:09:12] [SPEAKER_01]: I know I'm not always enough.

[00:09:14] [SPEAKER_01]: We try to take trips often to escape but I've always mentioned to her

[00:09:17] [SPEAKER_01]: if she ever felt the need to take a solo trip when feeling impulsive,

[00:09:21] [SPEAKER_01]: I would stay behind to take care of our dogs and house.

[00:09:24] [SPEAKER_01]: 2 weeks ago she booked a trip back to CO at Colorado

[00:09:27] [SPEAKER_01]: to visit old friends and stay alone in the mountains to grieve by herself

[00:09:31] [SPEAKER_01]: for her losses over the past year.

[00:09:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I was completely for it until the day before she left

[00:09:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I could tell something was bothering her and when I pressed,

[00:09:40] [SPEAKER_01]: she says that she feels we need a separation.

[00:09:43] [SPEAKER_01]: My heart absolutely sank.

[00:09:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Not only do I feel like I've failed as a partner,

[00:09:48] [SPEAKER_01]: but I'm so nervous about what that means going forward

[00:09:51] [SPEAKER_01]: if divorce happens with the house, our dogs etc.

[00:09:55] [SPEAKER_01]: After she left I noticed she left her wedding ring behind

[00:09:57] [SPEAKER_01]: and it pretty much killed any hope she still viewed our marriage as something to save.

[00:10:02] [SPEAKER_01]: As for the separation, we live in a small 2 bed house.

[00:10:06] [SPEAKER_01]: There is nowhere to escape and be alone when one wants privacy.

[00:10:10] [SPEAKER_01]: While I mostly work from home and get my me time,

[00:10:13] [SPEAKER_01]: she rarely has the opportunity.

[00:10:14] [SPEAKER_01]: We also don't have the funds for one of us to rent an apartment to truly be separated.

[00:10:20] [SPEAKER_01]: So back to my original question,

[00:10:22] [SPEAKER_01]: is there ever any hope to mending a marriage when one person wants a trial separation?

[00:10:27] [SPEAKER_01]: I asked if we could try counseling which she didn't oppose

[00:10:30] [SPEAKER_01]: but she's always been skeptical of therapists and counselors.

[00:10:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm in a bad place right now, especially since she told me before she left,

[00:10:38] [SPEAKER_01]: leaving me home by myself for 4 days not knowing what the future holds.

[00:10:43] [SPEAKER_01]: So in the comments BopperBopper says it also seems that somehow you ended up in a situation

[00:10:48] [SPEAKER_01]: that is the complete opposite of the way she likes to live.

[00:10:51] [SPEAKER_01]: She wants friends, freedom and travel

[00:10:53] [SPEAKER_01]: and you are living away from her friends in a tiny house.

[00:10:56] [SPEAKER_01]: It may be that there's another person in her life.

[00:10:59] [SPEAKER_01]: It may be that she's been telling you she's unhappy with the way that you live.

[00:11:03] [SPEAKER_01]: You both are living for quite some time and you've come up with excuses.

[00:11:07] [SPEAKER_01]: It might be that you're just fundamentally incompatible with your lifestyles.

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Toby says we originally moved here because we wanted to buy a house

[00:11:14] [SPEAKER_01]: and couldn't afford to do it where we were living.

[00:11:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Unfortunately, that meant leaving friends behind but hoping to make new ones.

[00:11:22] [SPEAKER_01]: We're also taking several trips a year together to fill in that travel itch.

[00:11:26] [SPEAKER_01]: But yes, I've been making excuses as far as their concerns

[00:11:29] [SPEAKER_01]: because I didn't think we'd be able to finally afford a change at this time.

[00:11:33] [SPEAKER_01]: But slowly I've been giving into the thought as I saw on how happy she's become.

[00:11:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Trespassers Will says are you actually in touch with her or did she just ghost?

[00:11:43] [SPEAKER_01]: Are all of these revelations and realizations too late or is she still receptive to you?

[00:11:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Leaving the ring seems kind of final.

[00:11:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Loopy says we've texted a little yesterday and today.

[00:11:53] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm trying to keep it light knowing we'll have plenty to discuss when she gets back.

[00:11:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Give me a ward says she's off on a solo trip to grieve by herself

[00:12:02] [SPEAKER_01]: and conveniently drops the separation bomb right before.

[00:12:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Sounds like she's already made up her mind.

[00:12:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Brace yourself buddy.

[00:12:09] [SPEAKER_01]: And I guess like some of these comments says there could be many reasons

[00:12:11] [SPEAKER_01]: but if I was putting myself in Opie's position and you know,

[00:12:15] [SPEAKER_01]: she told me she's going on a trip, she left the ring behind

[00:12:17] [SPEAKER_01]: that would look like the other comment said that would feel pretty final for me.

[00:12:22] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not saying you should just give up immediately but the way it's looking seems awfully bleak.

[00:12:39] [SPEAKER_00]: You can find our school goods on Nachtexpress.

[00:12:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Just upload a list of the items you want and pick them up stress-free at your Müller branch.

[00:12:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Now in your Müller branch or online at müller.de.

[00:12:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Müller.

[00:12:52] [SPEAKER_00]: On time for school start Müller will be selling prices of over 1000 written goods.

[00:12:56] [SPEAKER_00]: Everything for school, university and office you'll find at our best prices.

[00:13:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Or you can use our school goods on Nachtexpress.

[00:13:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Just upload a list of the items you want and pick them up stress-free at your Müller branch.

[00:13:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Now in your Müller branch or online at müller.de.

[00:13:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Opie came back into the post 5 days later and says first off thank you for many of you who had kind words through posts and direct messages.

[00:13:23] [SPEAKER_01]: It certainly helped allow me to vent and get my thoughts out.

[00:13:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Since it's been a few days since most of these comments I can't remember everything that was asked or touched on

[00:13:31] [SPEAKER_01]: but I wanted to catch you all up to speed on the last few days.

[00:13:35] [SPEAKER_01]: We did speak throughout the weekend through text and a couple of calls.

[00:13:38] [SPEAKER_01]: I had a couple of our mutual friends reach out when they learned of the news

[00:13:41] [SPEAKER_01]: and she used them as her outlet and source of advice having gone through their own separations.

[00:13:47] [SPEAKER_01]: We had a Saturday night call where she was alone at the condo and was extremely low.

[00:13:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I kept making sure she was safe but she assured me she would never hurt herself as she has too much she needs to accomplish and prove.

[00:13:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Sunday was a better day for her running the trails and attending a big event in Vail.

[00:14:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Finally on Monday night I picked her up around 11pm but were too exhausted to speak and she passed out as soon as her head hit the pillow.

[00:14:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Tuesday after work we had a couple of hours worth of good discussion.

[00:14:15] [SPEAKER_01]: It felt good to be able to speak openly about a lot of things.

[00:14:19] [SPEAKER_01]: She was able to explain her motivations a little more.

[00:14:21] [SPEAKER_01]: All her life she was told she couldn't do something or couldn't succeed.

[00:14:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Her parents were either absent or manipulative.

[00:14:28] [SPEAKER_01]: She feels she has something to prove by herself.

[00:14:30] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't fully understand why she feels the need to do it on her own without her partner and I may never understand this.

[00:14:37] [SPEAKER_01]: She brought up co-dependency and how especially after moving to Florida we lost who we were as individuals.

[00:14:44] [SPEAKER_01]: We do everything together since we don't have any friends here.

[00:14:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Also having the one car we feel obligated to never leave without the other.

[00:14:51] [SPEAKER_01]: I thoroughly enjoy our activities together but I get her point.

[00:14:54] [SPEAKER_01]: We did lose ourselves in each other pushing aside hobbies and friends.

[00:14:58] [SPEAKER_01]: This is something I know we need to figure out.

[00:15:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Her plans for sure include moving back to Colorado, whatever that timeline looks like.

[00:15:06] [SPEAKER_01]: She speaks to them as referring to her doing it alone and figuring out jobs and living situation.

[00:15:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Not going to lie this hurts hearing but I went along with it as I'm here to be supportive.

[00:15:17] [SPEAKER_01]: In a month when her real tall friend returns from vacay we're going to put our house up for sale.

[00:15:22] [SPEAKER_01]: What the next moves afterwards are I have no idea whether I will be part of them or not as this scares the shit out of me.

[00:15:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Having more flexibility at work and a support system of family we've decided to leave for 2 weeks starting this weekend.

[00:15:35] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm going to buy a car and first head up to my parents place in NC and either my sisters or another relative.

[00:15:42] [SPEAKER_01]: At this point I know I'll need to come home to recharge, see my dog, sleep in my own bed etc.

[00:15:46] [SPEAKER_01]: I told her this plan and she needs to be away from me, she need to find her own spot for however long.

[00:15:52] [SPEAKER_01]: This didn't go well and she took it as I was kicking her out.

[00:15:56] [SPEAKER_01]: I love living with her and don't mind sharing the space but I have to set a boundary.

[00:16:00] [SPEAKER_01]: This was something that she wants and I can't be the one leaving my home indefinitely.

[00:16:04] [SPEAKER_01]: I had to revisit the topic and tell her I'm not kicking her out just I don't want to have to leave my home in comfort.

[00:16:10] [SPEAKER_01]: She said she reacted because of the reality setting in that she has no one or nowhere to go.

[00:16:15] [SPEAKER_01]: She does have a couple of people that would take her in for a short duration if necessary but she is full of self doubt and abandonment issues.

[00:16:23] [SPEAKER_01]: As for living together currently, we're still sleeping in the same bed though now we're clothed in pajamas.

[00:16:30] [SPEAKER_01]: No cuddling, no kissing, maybe get a hug once a day.

[00:16:33] [SPEAKER_01]: It's so hard to turn off the switch like this as I'm a very affectionate person.

[00:16:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Touch and physical conduct is my love language so to that end I'm scared as to what that means our living situation will be like.

[00:16:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Is this healthy?

[00:16:46] [SPEAKER_01]: Would me having a car, leaving for a couple of weeks then coming back and vowing to live separate but still interconnected lives work?

[00:16:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Or do we need to absolutely move away from each other in order to heal?

[00:16:56] [SPEAKER_01]: I reached out to my organization's mental health line and got to spill my guts.

[00:17:01] [SPEAKER_01]: They set me up with a marriage therapist.

[00:17:03] [SPEAKER_01]: My wife was referred to one by a co-worker.

[00:17:06] [SPEAKER_01]: We still have so much to work through.

[00:17:08] [SPEAKER_01]: I go through highs and lows.

[00:17:09] [SPEAKER_01]: The not sleeping thing is weighing me down though.

[00:17:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I just hope and pray this is something we can work through and she's able to heal however she needs without moving across the country.

[00:17:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Best case I see is we continue to grow for our own selves until we can sell the house and move together and continue our lives back in the state we fell in love with each other.

[00:17:27] [SPEAKER_01]: And the two top comments on this one says

[00:17:29] [SPEAKER_01]: It ain't coming back to what it was dude.

[00:17:32] [SPEAKER_01]: It's time to look out for your own best interest.

[00:17:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I know it's not your want but reading this really made me feel like you don't get that it's over.

[00:17:39] [SPEAKER_01]: You don't recover from this.

[00:17:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Hopi says I'm slowly coming to the realization.

[00:17:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Letting go is just the hardest part.

[00:17:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Hailu says it's okay if it takes time.

[00:17:50] [SPEAKER_01]: This isn't like having a big blow up fight or finding out a spouse was cheating or some other horrible secret.

[00:17:56] [SPEAKER_01]: There's no big catalyst forcing you out of love.

[00:17:59] [SPEAKER_01]: The best you can do is try not talking yourself into having hope things will turn around.

[00:18:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Instead talk yourself into moving forward and remind yourself that with time it will get easier.

[00:18:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Hopi says thank you for this.

[00:18:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Guess all the advice from friends around me and material online says the same.

[00:18:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Don't make the act any easier but at least it's something to give me guidance and know I'm heading in the right direction.

[00:18:22] [SPEAKER_01]: And now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:18:26] [SPEAKER_01]: What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:18:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:18:33] [SPEAKER_01]: And let's have one more story.

[00:18:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Now our next story comes from the am I the asshole subreddit.

[00:18:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Doesn't have an update is yet.

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_01]: It's from hotfly1091 and says am I the asshole because I went on my honeymoon without my brand new wife since she had to take care of her sister.

[00:18:51] [SPEAKER_01]: I just got married.

[00:18:52] [SPEAKER_01]: My wife Tanya basically raised her sister Marie after their mom passed away.

[00:18:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Even after their dad remarried Tanya and her sister were more mom and daughter than sisters.

[00:19:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Marie got married last year and she got pregnant right away.

[00:19:07] [SPEAKER_01]: No not before they figured they got pregnant on their honeymoon.

[00:19:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Marie went into premature labor at our wedding reception.

[00:19:14] [SPEAKER_01]: She gave birth to a tiny but healthy baby girl.

[00:19:17] [SPEAKER_01]: And for some reason Tanya decided that she needed to go take care of her.

[00:19:21] [SPEAKER_01]: We were supposed to leave for our honeymoon 2 days after our wedding but Tanya said she just couldn't leave.

[00:19:27] [SPEAKER_01]: She isn't a doctor or nurse.

[00:19:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Marie has a dad, a step mom, a husband, a mother and father in law.

[00:19:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't understand why she had to go.

[00:19:36] [SPEAKER_01]: But we had non refundable tickets and insurance didn't cover I have to stay and take care of my sister as part of the coverage.

[00:19:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Plus I booked 2 weeks off for my wedding and honeymoon.

[00:19:47] [SPEAKER_01]: So since I was going to be home by myself doing nothing while my wife was in another city doing whatever.

[00:19:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I went on the honeymoon by myself.

[00:19:55] [SPEAKER_01]: I got a massive bed all to myself.

[00:19:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I used all the resort credits that were for couples massages, romantic excursions and special meals on deep sea fishing and a dune buggy tour on the island.

[00:20:06] [SPEAKER_01]: I just got back and my wife is still with her sister.

[00:20:09] [SPEAKER_01]: But she is upset I went on our honeymoons by myself.

[00:20:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Was I supposed to let the money go to waste?

[00:20:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Was I supposed to sit at home playing Diablo while I waited for her to be done?

[00:20:19] [SPEAKER_01]: We are fighting about it.

[00:20:21] [SPEAKER_01]: My friends all agree that I would have been dumb to waste the money and my time off.

[00:20:24] [SPEAKER_01]: My friends think I was a dick to go and enjoy myself while she was taking care of her sister and new baby.

[00:20:30] [SPEAKER_01]: I will add that there was no place for me to stay at Marie's house.

[00:20:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Tanya is sleeping in the nursery since the baby is still in NICU.

[00:20:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Positive Piccolo says as someone who had a baby in the NICU you are not the asshole.

[00:20:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Your wife is basically there to emotionally support her sister.

[00:20:46] [SPEAKER_01]: Babies in the NICU are surrounded 24x7 by still nurses and doctors and they are only allowed a few visitors for a limited amount of times per day.

[00:20:55] [SPEAKER_01]: So there is really nothing for your wife to do except hold her sister's hand.

[00:20:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Which may be really important.

[00:21:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Having a baby in the NICU is scary.

[00:21:04] [SPEAKER_01]: I was worried all the time.

[00:21:06] [SPEAKER_01]: If they are really close and that's all she is doing then support her decision.

[00:21:09] [SPEAKER_01]: But you were not needed in this scenario and the tickets would have been a total loss.

[00:21:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Plus it's your vacation too so not the asshole.

[00:21:18] [SPEAKER_01]: You both need to sit down and work this out or it will fester.

[00:21:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Commander replies that and says yes people could bash an OP for ditching his wife.

[00:21:26] [SPEAKER_01]: If anything his wife ditched him.

[00:21:28] [SPEAKER_01]: They had plans, she bailed and OP was left alone at home.

[00:21:32] [SPEAKER_01]: It might be a different situation if OP was allowed to join the rest of the family but he wasn't.

[00:21:36] [SPEAKER_01]: He was left alone at home by his newly wed wife just after their marriage.

[00:21:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Not the asshole.

[00:21:43] [SPEAKER_01]: One more comment which says not the asshole at all.

[00:21:45] [SPEAKER_01]: What were you supposed to do?

[00:21:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Sit in the house alone and waste all that money?

[00:21:49] [SPEAKER_01]: The baby is still in NICU.

[00:21:51] [SPEAKER_01]: That means Tanya wasn't taking care of her sister and new baby.

[00:21:55] [SPEAKER_01]: She was just taking care of her sister who had plenty of other support.

[00:21:59] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't understand why Tanya had to go.

[00:22:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Me either but it doesn't bode well for your new marriage.

[00:22:04] [SPEAKER_01]: She's telling you that she'd rather stay and be completely unnecessary help to her sister than be with her new husband.

[00:22:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Tanya is a selfish asshole.

[00:22:12] [SPEAKER_01]: She probably thinks she's supporting her sister but what she's really doing is crapping on you, her husband.

[00:22:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Marie is also an asshole if she didn't tell Tanya to go on the honeymoon.

[00:22:22] [SPEAKER_01]: But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:22:25] [SPEAKER_01]: What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:22:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:22:32] [SPEAKER_01]: And just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories.

[00:22:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Your love, your support, your time always means the absolute world to me.

[00:22:40] [SPEAKER_01]: So thank you so so much and hopefully I'll see you in the next one.

[00:22:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Take care and much love.