"Buy The Perfume I Like Or I'll End Our 2 Year Relationship" r/Relationships

[00:00:01] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories. And if you do love a Reddit story, why not consider? And that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. Let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now today's first story comes from MIRSW from the Relationship Advice subreddit and it says,

[00:00:22] My boyfriend, 24 male, threatened to break up with me over Miss Dior and now won't talk to me, 22 female, because I laughed. Hi guys, my boyfriend, 24 male, and me, 22 female, have been together for almost two years now. Aside from some small bumps in the road, we've been in a very good place throughout the whole relationship. However, last night's things escalated over, in my opinion, something super dumb.

[00:00:50] But he thinks differently of that and now stopped talking to me. It started when we were on bed, when we were on the bed and he was gaming and I was on my laptop looking to order a new perfume. Since I stopped my job, to focus on studying, I don't have much of an income. So I decided not to get an expensive perfume. I usually go for Miss Dior. I thought it'd be better to find a body spray with a resembling scent. As he was looking over my shoulder, he asked what I was doing, so I explained.

[00:01:19] He then reacted saying I wore Miss Dior in our first period of dating and it is my smell and it was one of the things that attracted him to me. I must admit, this made me a bit annoyed because I'd rather get that perfume too, but it's just not responsible to do so right now. He started rambling on about how I care more about saving money than I care about him. I said that's not true, but then he kept saying his hypersensitivity issues can't deal with adjusting to a new scent.

[00:01:48] I said I'd find a scent similar to my old one, but he wasn't content. At this point, he said he'd have to break up with me if I would go for another scent. I found this hilarious and thought he surely must be joking, so I laughed, which made him go silent. I let him be because I was really annoyed and he went to sleep. Now, he left early morning, doesn't respond to my texts or calls and I have no idea what to do. I'm starting to doubt how I handled a situation.

[00:02:16] Did I fail him by not taking his hypersensitivity into account? For me, this came across as particularly manipulative behavior. I mean, he watched his girlfriend trying to be financially responsible while she was studying and instead of offering to help buy the perfume, if it meant that much to him, he threatened to end a two-year relationship if she didn't spend the money that she doesn't have on an expensive perfume. And let's face it, it's an expensive perfume.

[00:02:45] I mean, I just did a quick Google and it says £88 and that's for the smaller bottle. And now he's given you the silent treatment after you laughed at, frankly, his absurd ultimatum. And I'm not saying, you know, there's no sensory issues there. There could be, but he has the choice to have an adult conversation with OP to come up with a solution. OP would love that perfume. They just can't afford it right now. The easiest option is, is that he can contribute or buy it.

[00:03:15] Not tell her that, you know, we're going to break up unless you buy that one. But MC Susie says, I'm concerned that you're even asking this question. This boyfriend of yours tried to assert that you must stick with a Dior perfume and never once offered to buy it. What is wrong with him? In any case, his reaction to your perfume choice is very strange. What are you asking us if you did something wrong? Shelby the Turd says,

[00:03:44] Say that aloud. He's holding the relationship hostage because you didn't smell a certain way. Auntie Venom says, He started rambling on how I care more about saving money than I care about him and then says that he offered to buy it for you. This is some of the dumbest shit I've ever heard. Sorry. If you're in the saving money mode, you're going to pull back on admittedly frivolous purchases. And any regular partner with their head on straight would be glad they had a frugal partner when circumstances demand.

[00:04:11] He wants you to overspend in order to satisfy his pants feelings. Thanks.

[00:04:52] The idea of letting him buy a bottle. However, for some context, I do think he might be on the spectrum. No diagnosis, but his dad is too. And it didn't make sense. So I did want to show him that I care about his hypersensitivity seriously. Therefore, I decided to suggest we pay half-half for a new Miss Dior. And then until that one would be finished, I'd make sure to do research to find a really good dupe. He was not convinced. Told me it wasn't my birthday anytime soon.

[00:05:21] I explained I understood, but we'd have to both compromise. Well, to quote his literal words. If you're such a feminist, you should be so financially too. This got me fuming. Had no words. So this time I left. As per your advice in the replies, I did some thinking about the rest of our relationship. I realized other things in our relationship that at the time didn't sit quite right with me. Were situations of him being controlling and self-concerned.

[00:05:49] Situations I always concerned as little things he'd mean differently or would learn from. I was wrong. You were right. I asked him to meet up today and I dumped his ass. I feel terrible right now, but I know I'm better off. So anyone, advice for a cheap, nice body spray. And Opie replied to some comments on that one. Someone said that was a difficult decision, but the right one. I don't know where you live, but in the UK and Ireland, Aldi does a great mist your dupe on occasion.

[00:06:18] It's called Perfect Pink. Opie says we do have an Aldi here, so I'm going to check it out. Thank you. Another commenter says good for you. He sounded unreasonable. I would have said that he should pay the difference between the perfume. You would have bought in the perfume he wanted you to buy. But his comments are so out of line, it's not even worth thinking about anymore. Opie says, I didn't even think about this. It would have been a good reaction, but since he thinks I have to pay for everything because I'm a feminist, I didn't think he would have been okay with that either.

[00:06:48] Another commenter says I'm so tired of people weaponizing feminism. Good riddance. Opie says this. I always found it very hard to be mad at him for long, but when he said this, I felt like he showed his true colors, and I was so, so done. Another commenter says, what did he say when you broke up with him? Opie says he mumbled something along the lines of, good, I deserve better. But after that, he did text me to say sorry, and if we can talk again. So he's not very consistent.

[00:07:18] Another commenter says, good on you for throwing him out, Opie. I'm glad you also got recommendations for a juke perfume, although maybe a change of fragrance may not be a bad idea, so you don't associate it with him. Opie says, thank you a lot. I was thinking the same thing. I feel like it's a good time to reinvent myself, starting off with a new signature scent. Hee hee. I love a hee hee. And good on Opie to get themselves out of that situation.

[00:07:46] Yeah, red flags were waving, right? But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below, and let's move on to another story. Now our next story comes from the wedding drama subreddit from Tiny Birds Nest who says, Friend having wedding day before mine, and kept relationship hidden for a whole year. What do I do? Apologies for the long post. So, I'm getting married in a few weeks.

[00:08:15] About a month ago, one of my best friends who I've known since college and have kept in regular contact with dropped the bomb that she was getting married. I didn't even know she was seeing anyone. She then drops the bomb that she's marrying a guy in our friend group and that her wedding is going to have to be the day before mine, because her father-in-law can't get time off work at any other time that month, and essentially gave a few of the half-arsed reasons about why other weekends weren't possible.

[00:08:41] One weekend will be a few days before her period starts so she'll be bloated. The other, she's on her period. The other is Valentine's weekend and that's cringy. The other is too close to Ramadan so she can't go on a honeymoon straight away. Some backstory about the person she's marrying. She is someone that we always thought she had a thing, but she'd always deny it and say she saw him like a brother. We used to argue a bit over her prioritizing him over me back in college,

[00:09:08] especially because this guy and I didn't really get on much and her and I were so close. Example, me and her had brunch plans once and she spent the whole time texting him. After graduating though, I feel like we all matured and put differences behind us. To the point where her husband-to-be was actually invited to my wedding as my friend. My knee-jerk reaction to telling her that she was engaged was crying tears of joy for her. I was truly happy for her.

[00:09:36] But when I went home to think about it, I felt really icky. All year, I've been wedding planning. She's been asking me really specific questions about my planning process. She complained to me that, as my best friend, she didn't feel involved enough in my planning process and she wanted to come dress shopping with me. Which I invited her to because of her expressing this. But then for her to turn around and tell me that she's been dating this guy on and off for a year while also keeping it a secret,

[00:10:04] makes her feeling left out of my stuff come across as so hypocritical. And then there's the question of why the rush since she's known him a decade? And why specifically my wedding weekend when I sent out my save the dates back in March? So she's had much time to plan and leave some time in between. It's not about me not having all the attention on me. It's just how can she expect me to be fully present at her wedding? And how selfish she must be to expect me to have to fit her into an already stressful weekend for me.

[00:10:34] When I told her this, she doubled down on that weekend being the only one available. And that she specifically chose that one because she knew I'd be available since I'd booked a few days off from work before the wedding. And that she needed me at her wedding. She said I would embarrass her around her future in-law since she made such a point of needing to pick a date that I could attend. Even though I had no clue she was seeing him, nor did she check if the day was a good fit for me. I then also expressed how upset I was that she kept the relationship hidden from me.

[00:11:03] To which she said she thought I'd cut her off because of my history of not getting on with this guy. Again, we all moved past that stuff years ago. And I were a far cry from the kids we were when we all met back in freshman year. When I told her I didn't think I could make a wedding. She was so upset she cried and said she never thought I'd do that to her and skip a wedding. She'd been telling other friends in the friend group that I'm coming to the wedding when they've asked if that date is doable for me.

[00:11:29] We haven't spoken since my conversation about how upset with her I was a month ago. I'm not trying to be a bridezilla and I know people are entitled to be private. My issue is that she should have extended that privacy with me and not asked so many questions about my life knowing she was being so type-lipped with hers. This is where I now need advice. I feel so bitter, like the whole friendship was a lie. I can't make it to her wedding and honestly, having her at mine feels disingenuous.

[00:11:57] She's been telling friends she is still coming to mine. Is it rude for me not to go to her wedding? Should I go to her wedding since this is a decade-long friendship? Part of me wants to disinvite her and her husband from my wedding because of the lies. Is that rude? Is there a polite way to disinvite someone from your wedding without coming across like an absolute villain? Thank you for reading up to here if you have. Edits I'm Middle Eastern, so traditionally we don't have bridesmaids or a rehearsal dinner.

[00:12:24] Also fix some of the wording plus added some more detail. Now, it might not be this, but to me it just felt like she saw your wedding, she wants to get married before you, and that's simply it. And wanting to be more involved in all the planning, etc. She wanted your ideas. I was kind of thinking there's a chance here that your two weddings are going to be absolutely identical.

[00:12:46] You're going to be at the same venues, the same decorations, the same table layouts, the same everything because she's taken all your ideas and then used them the day before. You know, that might be the extreme, but it kind of felt like it was going that way for me. But some comments were Opie replying. Commenter said, When did this friend send out wedding invitations that you just found out and she's expecting you to attend? It sounds very last minute on her part. Opie says,

[00:13:12] So from what I've heard from the grapevine, she's only just found a venue and no invitations have gone out yet. She's been insisting that officially the engagement and knowing they were getting married in November, which is why nothing has been booked. It all just seems so wishy-washy to me. Commenter says, I just have to add a totally instant gut reaction to the situation. Your friend was siphoning off all of your wedding planning to make hers easier. Bad, I'm not the only one thinking that. She deliberately planned a day before yours to cover that fact up.

[00:13:42] Hers is the earlier wedding, therefore you copied her. In her mind anyway. I'm very sorry you're going through this, but this is not a friend. Grieve the loss of what you thought you had and move on with your life. No way should you bother to attend her wedding. She knows it isn't possible for you to go the day before your own wedding. She planned that, but I would formally revoke her invitation to your wedding. Best of luck. Hugs from an internet nana. Opie responds saying that's what I was thinking too.

[00:14:10] Before all of this, she kept on saying how easy wedding plans seem to be going for me. It's not been easy at all. I'm just good at hiding it and very organized. And how I thought of things she would never have known was a thing. In terms of disinviting and the cultural impact, it's very split down the middle with opinions. So I'm really torn. Thank you for the hugs. I really appreciate it. This has really helped me feel like I'm not being unreasonable or a bridezilla. Commenter says to Opie, Quite simply, she's a terrible friend.

[00:14:41] Here's the gist of what you wrote.

[00:15:13] If she thought you'd cut her off for dating this man, why would she think you'd be okay not cutting her off for marrying him? She seems the kind of friend who wants to know all of your business without sharing anything from her own life. Honestly, not the kind of company you'd want to keep. Yeah, and also just going back on the friends where she's lying to everyone about you attending her wedding. I found it pretty telling where she'd been telling people that you're going to the wedding. And they was asking, is that date doable for me?

[00:15:42] You know, the friends know that that's a huge ask. And I can only imagine them being shocked like, really? The day before her wedding? Lopey responded to that last comment saying heavy on the last point. Have so many friends who are private people and don't speak on many things until they're set in stone. At the same time, they follow and don't ask, don't tell policy. So it doesn't bother me at all. And I completely agree about the worry of me cutting her off. I said this to her and she really didn't have anything to say in response. I was over all of that stuff anyway.

[00:16:11] I invited him to the wedding because I'd gotten over my dislike of him these last few years. But apparently she has selective memory and only wants to believe the things that suit her narrative. Another commenter says, How would she know you got over your dislike of her fiance? Lopey says, She should have known I moved past it because we all hang out as a group a few times a year. And her husband-to-be received an invite to my wedding. My issue is her getting upset with me for not being involved in my wedding planning, which comes across as hypocritical. But you're right.

[00:16:40] I've learned I should be more tight-lipped about certain things now, I guess. Commodore says in reply saying, So, she told your friends about the wedding weeks ago. She's been telling other friends in the friend group that I'm coming to the wedding and they've asked if that date is doable for me. And says, How long did she invite them? No one mentioned it to you. It is unreasonable for anyone to expect you to attend a wedding the day before yours, especially with only a few weeks notice. Lopey says,

[00:17:14] Someone said, What kind of wedding is she planning? Is this like a courthouse wedding in the late morning followed by a nice lunch or a full-on catered event? The request is certainly presumptuous of her. So, I'm just trying to understand all the details. Lopey says, Someone says,

[00:17:42] Someone says, Someone says, Someone said, Opey says, Definitely don't think she's pregnant. I know she's quite religious, but of course, that doesn't really mean it's not a possibility. Opey added one more thought and said, Trust me, there are so many holes that I'm curious about too in her story, and a lot else that I didn't put in myself. In terms of how busy I'll be, the day before Opey's wedding, I'll be putting together my wedding favors with the girls in the family

[00:18:12] in the days leading up to the wedding. We'll be doing airport runs up to the day before, as a lot of family will be traveling in, some from 20 plus hours away. And we live close to three major airports, so it's all hands on deck. And honestly, I was hoping I'd get a nice early night to relax for once, because I've had such a busy year. I'll be combining my Henna event with a reception on the day of the wedding, because I've already had two events. I have a western-style bridal shower the weekend before, so I wanted to cut down on events.

[00:18:42] So, a month and a half after that post, Opey updates, and says a few people in the original post were asking about rehearsal dinners, and all of that stuff. I'm Middle Eastern, and we don't really do that in our culture. Some people also said I needed to get over myself, and that I don't own the whole weekend, which is true. I don't. My issue was the lying, and also the expectation of me to drive a total of five hours, two and a half hours there and back, the day before my wedding, and to attend another, when I had so many things to finalize.

[00:19:12] I also just needed to vent. Being lied to and having something that felt so calculated happen, and what I thought was one of my closest friendships, is strange. Oh, and I don't think it was a shotgun wedding, which a lot of people were suggesting. Anyway, I had my wedding. It was perfect, and I wouldn't change a thing. I didn't go to her wedding. I genuinely didn't have the time. I did see some posted videos of her wedding. She didn't copy mine,

[00:19:42] I'll give her her flowers though. Her wedding was gorgeous, but definitely not a two-month planned wedding, like she was making it out it was to me. In the end, she ended up coming to my wedding about three hours late. I was too busy being in my own newly married bubble, to notice her or anything. But I did get feedback from people, who were sat at her table. Like people said she would in my original post, she spent the whole time talking about her wedding. In our culture, the bride receives a heavy piece of gold jewelry at her wedding.

[00:20:11] She's made a show of having her new husband take her piece of jewelry out of her bag and putting it on her at the table, just after my husband and I. Feels so nice saying that. Did our outfit change? She was also showing off other pieces of jewelry she received, making a point to emphasize that she received real sapphires and real diamonds. Her and her husband also spent the whole time texting each other, which means they were probably saying not very nice things, that they didn't want our mutual friends overhearing. And she would frequently turn to him and say,

[00:20:41] don't worry, we're leaving soon. They were also packing on the PDA with neck kisses. She also then cried to my mom and brother about how she doesn't understand why I've not been talking to her and how I've been so cold to her. This wasn't true. I'd only told her how much her actions and lies had hurt me. And to be honest, she was the one who didn't respond to my last message. My mom being the classic mom she is, brought her to me and tried to make us hug it out.

[00:21:09] We have this very awkward exchange caught on camera. My mom did tell my friend that she shouldn't have lied to me for a whole year though. So it's nice to know she had my back, even if she pulled a typical mom move trying to make everyone happy. Our mutual friends are all on my side. No one really thinks she's in the right. Most of them didn't go to her wedding, with the invites being so last minute and her wedding being on a weekday. A lot of people couldn't get the time off for childcare. No one else knew about the wedding, which is crazy.

[00:21:38] I do believe that her truth is that she doesn't think she's done anything wrong. And she really does think that she considered me and my situation in her wedding planning. Unfortunately, I think it's one of those friendships where we no longer really align. And I've taken a step back and distanced myself from her. I do appreciate that she came to my wedding. However, I think she did it to make a point. More than out of the goodness of her heart and respect for our friendship, considering what she pulled. Absolutely, I'd be pulling myself out of that friendship. That is not a friendship.

[00:22:07] Friends don't treat you like that. And it just felt like she was trying to one-up you in this whole situation. The whole wedding. Maybe she didn't copy you, but maybe she was trying to find ways to, again, one-up you during your wedding with the decorations, the setup of it all, or whatever. And then for me, what really sealed the deal on that is at your wedding, when she turned up and then you said about the heavy piece of gold jewelry that you put on, that your husband puts on, and she did it just after you.

[00:22:38] She knew exactly what she was doing. There's no way you can sit there and think, oh, I'm just gonna put on my piece of gold jewelry now right after the bride and not think that you're doing something there. Absolutely wild and weird behavior. And to be quite frank, I wouldn't want to be a part of it either. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories. Your love, your support, your time. It always means

[00:23:07] the absolute world to me. So thank you so, so much and hopefully, I'll see you in the next one. Take care and much love.

[00:23:44] Bye. Auf booking.com findest du dein Ferienhaus ganz einfach. Booking.com booking.com