A Planned Pregnancy Turned My Husband Into A Monster r/Relationships

[00:00:03] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you're well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories. And if you do love a Reddit story, why not consider a like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys.

[00:00:20] Now today's first story comes from the true off my chest subreddit from a throw away account that says, A planned pregnancy turned my husband into a monster.

[00:00:30] But before we do get into today's story, I just want to let you know that there is a trigger warning of domestic abuse on it. So if you do want to skip the story, please feel free to do so. Timestamps are always down in the description and along the timeline below. Thank you.

[00:00:45] It feels like a cruel, cruel joke. Years before I met my husband, I was in such a toxic, abusive relationship that it almost ended my life.

[00:00:54] I spent years in therapy, bettering myself, figuring out why I accepted that type of love.

[00:01:02] I stayed single for years and once I started dating, I made sure to keep an eye out on all the red flags. Heck, I even took things slowly when there was nothing but green flags.

[00:01:12] Thanks to my ex, I was familiar with love bombing. I met my husband at a work event and things just fell into place.

[00:01:19] I opened up and explained my past trauma and let him know that if we were going to date, that we would require a slow pace and patience.

[00:01:28] I won't say that he was perfect, but he was always kind, compassionate and cared.

[00:01:33] We dated for about five years, engaged for one and married for a little over three years now.

[00:01:39] We recently bought our second home together.

[00:01:41] We both got promotions at work, so we sat down and talked about kids.

[00:01:46] He wanted a big family and I only wanted one or two.

[00:01:50] We agreed on two and, well, started trying.

[00:01:54] It didn't take long and here I am six months pregnant.

[00:01:57] Still working, have swollen ankles and a back that won't stop aching.

[00:02:02] Other than that, I've been very happy and have what I thought was a supportive husband.

[00:02:07] Three weeks ago, I found out that he was having an emotional affair and honestly, probably a physical one.

[00:02:13] When confronted with evidence, he admitted to not being attracted to me while pregnant.

[00:02:18] I'm wracked.

[00:02:19] I haven't gained unnecessary weight.

[00:02:21] I still take care of myself, even with the morning sickness that hasn't gone away.

[00:02:26] He's not sorry about it, but told me that I was being overdramatic when I cried.

[00:02:30] He's staying with his family until he can find a home to rent.

[00:02:33] He doesn't want to get a divorce.

[00:02:35] He's saying after the pregnancy is over, we can go to therapy and fix things.

[00:02:40] I don't want to.

[00:02:41] I cannot physically look at this man in the eye anymore without feeling disgust.

[00:02:45] I have a text from him saying that he's my only option because no man wants to date a single mum.

[00:02:51] I'll be talking to a lawyer and figuring out how to divorce him.

[00:02:54] And I just wanted to vent into the void today.

[00:02:57] For now, I'm going to door dash some nuggets and a frosty from Wendy's and be okay if I gain five pounds from it.

[00:03:04] Thanks for listening.

[00:03:05] Well, reading I suppose.

[00:03:07] On the back of that, someone offered to pay for Opie's door dash and they said thank you for the offer.

[00:03:12] I already ordered my food and I'm stuffed.

[00:03:14] And then in response to a deleted comment, Opie says,

[00:03:17] I don't think you deserve the amount of dislikes for asking a question.

[00:03:20] Maybe it was the way you worded it.

[00:03:22] Who really knows?

[00:03:23] Emotional was how I decided to word it.

[00:03:25] Because what else do I call just talking?

[00:03:28] He was telling a very young, naive woman how hot she was, how he couldn't wait to touch her body.

[00:03:34] Telling her he loved her but then claimed they never met.

[00:03:37] Who complained to her that I wasn't fun anymore?

[00:03:40] There were obvious pictures sent back and forth through the comments but the pictures were deleted.

[00:03:45] I asked him about all the overtime at work and he wouldn't give straight answers, hence the physical aspect of things.

[00:03:51] This man went from working maybe 40 hours a week to 60.

[00:03:55] And I may be dealing with pregnancy but I'm not stupid.

[00:03:59] You didn't ask this but I'm putting it here because people have brought it up and they may read this comment.

[00:04:04] I would never expect my husband or whatever you want to call him to find my changing body attractive.

[00:04:10] Pregnancy is weird.

[00:04:11] I think it's beautiful but he or others don't have to.

[00:04:14] What I did expect was him to not call me hideous to another woman.

[00:04:17] Or to cheat especially while I'm growing a life we both wanted.

[00:04:22] Someone said, why do you have to move?

[00:04:25] Opie says we bought our home together and instead of fighting it out we'll be selling and splitting assets.

[00:04:30] Or at least I hope that's how it will be.

[00:04:33] Plus I just don't want to be here in this house.

[00:04:35] It's too big for just a baby and I plus the dog he just had to have.

[00:04:39] That's currently curled up in the bed with me.

[00:04:42] On the back of that someone says have you moved out yet?

[00:04:44] Opie said, oh I'm sorry I'm still in the shared home.

[00:04:47] He moved out to stay with his family until he finds another place.

[00:04:51] And look, none of this is to do with you being pregnant.

[00:04:55] This is with him being an absolute scumbag.

[00:04:57] There was many comments calling him a wolf in sheep's clothing just waiting until that point where she was trapped in the relationship

[00:05:04] before he revealed his true self.

[00:05:07] And it felt like that to me as I was reading it at the same time.

[00:05:11] I'm not surprised but I still find it incredibly scary that someone can hide their true selves for so long and then just reveal it just like that.

[00:05:21] I think that's terrifying.

[00:05:23] Opie updated in the same post and said I'm making an edit because I'm not sure this sub will let me do an update post.

[00:05:28] I was told I'm not allowed to change the locks due to it being his home as well.

[00:05:32] And he came over last night knowing there wasn't crap I could do to prevent it.

[00:05:37] Thankfully, he only grabbed some personal belongings, threatened to take the dogs.

[00:05:40] He did not and let me know he emptied our shared account.

[00:05:44] Part of me rolled my eyes and figured he wasn't dumb enough to do that.

[00:05:48] And the other part of me made a mental note to check it once he left.

[00:05:51] Sure enough, our account maybe has $5 in it.

[00:05:55] He did a transfer which I'll be calling the bank about and speaking to an attorney this afternoon.

[00:06:00] Thankfully, my dad taught me you don't fully mix finances so my savings wasn't capable of being touched.

[00:06:06] And while it's not a lot, it's enough to pay for the fees over the next few weeks.

[00:06:10] I don't have any family left so I think he's doing a power play to make me feel like I'm alone and need him.

[00:06:15] When in all reality, it's lit a fire under my ass that I don't want or need such a garbage person in my life.

[00:06:23] Thank you to everyone that's reached out with comments, kind messages and helpful advice.

[00:06:28] OP's next update says,

[00:06:29] I wanted to do an update with how many people took the time to send messages, leave comments and share their own personal stories.

[00:06:35] Which especially helped make me feel not so alone.

[00:06:38] Which especially helped make me feel not so alone.

[00:06:41] As mentioned in an edited post, I was not allowed to change the locks on our house due to both of our names being on it.

[00:06:48] I never feared for my safety.

[00:06:50] It was more so an annoyance.

[00:06:52] He showed up to grab some personal belongings and I thought that would be the most that would happen.

[00:06:56] It was like he was trying to get a reaction from me.

[00:07:00] He told me he transferred funds and emptied out the account.

[00:07:03] I didn't believe him until I saw it myself.

[00:07:06] That was both of our money so that's being dealt with currently.

[00:07:09] He showed up the day before yesterday completely drunk, begging to talk, increasing in anger when I would just ignore him and walk away.

[00:07:17] I kept increasing so I went to grab my bag and walk down the road to a neighbor's home so I wasn't alone.

[00:07:23] He grabbed my arm to stop me and when I yanked it away, he slapped me.

[00:07:28] Almost a backhanded open slap.

[00:07:30] The cops were called.

[00:07:31] I didn't have a mark on my face.

[00:07:33] It was my word versus his.

[00:07:35] They escorted him off the property and I'm only now assuming he's back with his parents now.

[00:07:39] He did throw a fit about the dogs and does have proof of ownership so I'm guessing he'll be able to take them.

[00:07:45] I went to leave to go for a drive to clear my head after everything and realized three of my four tires were flat.

[00:07:52] I know it was him but I don't have proof.

[00:07:54] Insurance won't cover it so going to a tire shop on Friday morning.

[00:07:58] Just another drop in the bucket.

[00:08:00] As for the attorney, I've had my consult and I'm waiting for my chick to come in for my actual appointment and getting the ball moving on this.

[00:08:08] There's not any family left and a few close friends I kept in the loop but I don't want to burden them or treat them like unpaid therapists.

[00:08:16] So I think that's why I came back to Reddit.

[00:08:18] Something therapeutic about just typing it all out into the void.

[00:08:22] The baby and pregnancy is okay.

[00:08:24] I've actually lost weight and the doctor has told me to avoid stressful situations and to take things easy.

[00:08:30] I'll be calling to see if I can change the locks on the home now and if not, I'm going to start looking for places.

[00:08:35] And my first thought with that is like if I ever had a friend in a similar situation, I would want them to be telling me about what's going on.

[00:08:44] And I think OP should be doing the same, leaning on support around her where she can.

[00:08:49] Friends would want to help you in a situation like this.

[00:08:52] Terrifying.

[00:08:53] Backhanded you.

[00:08:54] Stabbing the tires on your car.

[00:08:56] This guy is dangerous.

[00:08:58] Super dangerous.

[00:09:00] A comment said to OP as well, it's okay to burden one of your friends.

[00:09:03] Otherwise, you could stay in a woman's shelter for safety.

[00:09:07] OP replied saying staying with friends isn't possible.

[00:09:09] A lot are out of state and lawyer mentioned abandonment of assets.

[00:09:13] Plus my job and doctor are here.

[00:09:15] I do have someone coming out and putting a few cameras up and thankfully the neighborhood is aware and keeping an eye out.

[00:09:21] This is all short term, of course, and the goal is to leave.

[00:09:24] There's just a ton of reasons why that can't be right this moment.

[00:09:28] OP responded to a different commenter and said,

[00:09:30] And unfortunately, all my friends are out of state and too far away from my work, doctor, and I was recommended to stay on the property so he couldn't go after me for abandoning the assets.

[00:09:40] OP on their best friend and says thank you.

[00:09:43] While I'm trying to do what I can and stay safe, my friends are on the other side of the US.

[00:09:48] What we're doing right now is FaceTimes and phone calls.

[00:09:51] My best friend has outright said if she calls and I don't call back within five minutes of our setup time, she's calling the police.

[00:09:57] She also put in for some time off work and wants to come up to help me look at places and just be there in general.

[00:10:03] I'm not going to lie.

[00:10:04] I'm struggling in every way possible and I'm scared but I know I have a support system to lean on.

[00:10:10] Someone said about cameras.

[00:10:11] OP says,

[00:10:21] Someone says,

[00:10:22] I hope you get that money back.

[00:10:24] OP says,

[00:10:25] I really hope so too.

[00:10:26] He seriously transferred everything but $5 from the checking and savings, which didn't even have his name on it.

[00:10:32] Someone says,

[00:10:32] Wait, how?

[00:10:34] OP says,

[00:10:54] Someone mentions to OP about the relationship with the in-laws and can you start the divorce proceedings sooner than the birth.

[00:11:01] OP says,

[00:11:02] While I would consider it a civil relationship with the in-laws, they are his parents and in their eyes he can do no wrong.

[00:11:08] He's an only child and they have a very, very close relationship.

[00:11:11] His mother apologized on his behalf but asked me to put myself in his shoes.

[00:11:16] They're choosing to wear blinders to the whole situation.

[00:11:20] With a divorce, that's the whole attorney thing.

[00:11:23] I've done a free consultation.

[00:11:25] The attorney and I agreed with the assets and how things are going, it won't be a mediation.

[00:11:29] And will be a long, expensive court battle knowing how spiteful he's being.

[00:11:33] They've recommended a police report on any issue to have it filed.

[00:11:37] To not block contact with him for proof of harassment.

[00:11:40] And that the best course of action is selling the property and splitting assets.

[00:11:44] I'd love to focus on my pregnancy and myself but due to safety reasons, I'm staying on top of legal issues.

[00:11:49] OP's next post says he broke in late last night.

[00:11:52] I was able to contact the police before I confronted him but due to the location, I knew it would be a bit.

[00:11:57] I tried walking by him to leave the house but every time I would, he would shove me.

[00:12:01] Once hard enough to make me stumble and fall backwards.

[00:12:04] The eerie part is he never once yelled through things.

[00:12:08] One of the items hit me causing an emergency room visit requiring stitches.

[00:12:12] He said the most vile things.

[00:12:14] He hated me.

[00:12:15] I should kill myself.

[00:12:16] How useless I was etc.

[00:12:18] Yet never once raised his voice.

[00:12:20] I'm not saying that in a good way.

[00:12:21] I wish he would have yelled.

[00:12:23] It was a fight or flight instinct and I found out mine was to freeze.

[00:12:27] I hate that for myself.

[00:12:29] He was arrested and his mother already bailed him out.

[00:12:32] I'm staying in a hotel thanks to a work advance and looking into apartments.

[00:12:36] I won't be stepping foot into that home we shared until my best friend is here and

[00:12:40] even then it will be with police being with us.

[00:12:43] Nobody can figure out what made him change almost overnight.

[00:12:46] Only thing I'm guessing is a psychotic break but I'm not a therapist or doctor.

[00:12:50] Besides some ugly bruises and some stitches myself and the baby are fine.

[00:12:54] My lawyer feels this is enough to get a protection order for myself and will include the pregnancy

[00:12:59] and baby.

[00:13:00] Next time I see him we'll be in court.

[00:13:02] Sorry I'm rambling and maybe this doesn't make any sense.

[00:13:06] Now I'm safe.

[00:13:07] Can sleep good for the first time in weeks.

[00:13:09] I have dogs.

[00:13:11] Nobody is aware of where I am besides one close person and the police.

[00:13:15] Final update they said in this post but there's another update as well.

[00:13:18] I changed the locks.

[00:13:19] Figured if he'd get the law involved I'd use pregnancy brain and being forgetful to give him a spare set.

[00:13:25] So someone asked OP could it be a head injury.

[00:13:28] OP says I wish she was hit in the head.

[00:13:30] Fucker deserves it.

[00:13:32] On a serious note nothing changed.

[00:13:34] No outside stress.

[00:13:35] No injuries.

[00:13:36] Nothing that I'm aware of.

[00:13:37] I know it sounds unbelievable but once the mask slipped gloves were off.

[00:13:41] I think he thought he wanted it to the point where he tried to believe that that is what he wanted slash the right thing to do.

[00:13:49] It's hard.

[00:13:50] It's so damn hard.

[00:13:51] I wish I could hate him but I just feel sorry for him.

[00:13:54] That does not mean I will ever go back or at this point talk to him without the law involved.

[00:13:59] I'm choosing myself and the little one.

[00:14:01] And really it's his loss.

[00:14:04] Someone says can you get an abortion?

[00:14:06] OP says I've had a couple of those comments so don't take this reply personally.

[00:14:09] Just the one I'm using.

[00:14:11] Abortion is not in the books for me.

[00:14:13] I'm not anti-abortion and I feel like it's the right women should have and it's heartbreaking what our nation is going through when it comes to women having that stripped away.

[00:14:21] I'm six months pregnant.

[00:14:22] I can feel her move.

[00:14:24] I love her.

[00:14:24] She isn't a fetus to me.

[00:14:26] She is a baby.

[00:14:27] If I was four to eight weeks, yeah maybe it would have been an option but it isn't now.

[00:14:32] I will take every step in making sure we are protected.

[00:14:35] I will love her enough for the both of us.

[00:14:37] I will not let a sperm donor have the opportunity to hurt her.

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[00:15:32] OP comes in with another post and says police met me at my home to grab some personal belongings and pretty much anything and everything else I could grab.

[00:15:39] Thanks to the user who recommended me calling the non-emergency number.

[00:15:43] It was smooth sailing.

[00:15:44] He wasn't home.

[00:15:45] I didn't have the fear of him showing up and both officers were very kind.

[00:15:49] What I walked into on the other hand was not very fun.

[00:15:52] This man looked like he went on a bender.

[00:15:55] Bleach on clothes, food everywhere, personal belongings just destroyed, especially the nursery.

[00:16:00] I was able to salvage a lot of the bigger items and packed what I could.

[00:16:04] They're now in storage until I move into my place.

[00:16:07] Took pictures and as aggravating as it was, especially the one step forward two steps back,

[00:16:12] I'm hopeful that there'd just be another thing used against him to prevent custody.

[00:16:17] As far as him, he has no way of contacting other than attorney or email and it's been quiet on both ends.

[00:16:23] His parents have not reached out and I don't even know what to say to them if they tried so no loss there.

[00:16:30] His girlfriend, yes, girlfriend as I found out, has been trying to contact me via friends to let me know she's pregnant.

[00:16:37] I'm unsure if that's true or not, but that in the very least confirms the affair and how well he kept things hidden.

[00:16:43] I do want to clear the air.

[00:16:45] I made a post asking for helpful information on resources that could potentially help and

[00:16:49] someone made a comment saying I was in it for a long con.

[00:16:53] And that's just untrue.

[00:16:54] I have not and will not accept any personal items or donations other than advice and maybe an internet hug.

[00:17:01] While I wish my story was made up, it is not.

[00:17:04] Maybe it's a venting board.

[00:17:05] Maybe it's just connecting with people that have been in the same situation, but it helps keep me sane.

[00:17:11] Anyways, I'll leave it at a thank you all for listening and checking up on me.

[00:17:14] I'm safe.

[00:17:15] I'm good.

[00:17:16] Pregnancy is the only thing kicking my ass and I make sure to post in a few months,

[00:17:20] letting you all know she's here and that we made it.

[00:17:23] Bye for now.

[00:17:24] I hope you left a comment on this post and says,

[00:17:26] Oh, trust me.

[00:17:26] I'm having bad days with it, especially emotionally.

[00:17:29] I'm sure the hormones aren't helping.

[00:17:31] I've debated if I turned a blind eye and if there really weren't any red flags.

[00:17:36] I've had moments where I've missed him because it's not just a switch.

[00:17:40] We loved each other or at least I loved him.

[00:17:42] This is a person I planned a future and had a past with.

[00:17:46] It's really just an emotional rollercoaster and that's okay.

[00:17:49] I don't think there's a right or wrong way to handle all of this, but I'm doing my best.

[00:17:53] Opie also commented on one of their posts that they deleted,

[00:17:57] one of their comments that they deleted and said,

[00:17:58] I'm not asking for money. I'm sorry it came across that way.

[00:18:01] I can provide proof and anything else.

[00:18:03] I had multiple people reach out and ask if they could help and I've always turned it down.

[00:18:08] The only thing I'm asking is for someone to point me in the way of an organization that I may not know of.

[00:18:12] If that's coming across as that way though,

[00:18:14] I can and will delete my post as it wasn't my intention.

[00:18:18] Opie came in with another update and says,

[00:18:21] I've read every single message in the majority of comments.

[00:18:24] Thank you for sharing your experiences, your advice, your love.

[00:18:28] More than a few have offered baby items, groceries and gift cards.

[00:18:31] I cannot in goodwill accept any of those, but if you have any items laying around,

[00:18:36] please consider donating them to a charity that helps homeless parents.

[00:18:39] One thing that stuck out is someone asked how I could feel sorry for him.

[00:18:44] I guess I'm an empathetic person to the point where it could be a flaw.

[00:18:47] I wish if he was so unhappy, he would have just told me.

[00:18:51] We could have fixed it before it became violent and if it wasn't fixable,

[00:18:54] we both could have been amazing parents.

[00:18:56] His girlfriend that reached out wrote an email in which was forwarded to me.

[00:19:01] She's saying she's pregnant and for her sake, I hope she's not.

[00:19:04] She's accusing me of ruining a good man's reputation.

[00:19:08] She called the injuries self-inflicted and how they want a paternity test.

[00:19:12] My personal favorite was if my baby is actually his,

[00:19:16] she hopes her baby can grow up with her and have a sister.

[00:19:19] Little does she know I will go to hell and back to make sure that man does not know anything about my daughter.

[00:19:25] As for him, I've seen him once while leaving the grocery store.

[00:19:29] Outside me was calm, cool and collected,

[00:19:32] acted like he was a stranger I wouldn't give a second look at.

[00:19:35] On the inside, I said,

[00:19:36] oh shit, about 500 times and cried in the car.

[00:19:40] Money situation is fixed.

[00:19:42] Work bonus and promotion.

[00:19:44] I've bought a new and better living room suite and having a painting party at the end of the month.

[00:19:48] You're all invited by the way.

[00:19:50] Still good, still safe,

[00:19:52] slowly learning to love my new normal.

[00:19:54] If you're in a similar situation or in an abusive relationship,

[00:19:58] man or woman, reach out.

[00:19:59] You're not alone.

[00:20:01] You don't need to be brave.

[00:20:02] I'm certainly not.

[00:20:04] You just need that,

[00:20:05] I can't do this anymore,

[00:20:06] to light that fire.

[00:20:08] Someone says to Opio on the back of this one,

[00:20:10] I'm a petty Betty and would have posted the girlfriend's text about ruining a good man's reputation

[00:20:15] right next to all the destruction of the house.

[00:20:17] Let everyone see what a good man he is.

[00:20:21] Opio says,

[00:20:22] you know,

[00:20:22] petty me wanted to show her the texts,

[00:20:24] the pictures,

[00:20:25] the well,

[00:20:26] everything.

[00:20:26] I'm going to let him show her himself because until he does,

[00:20:30] I'll just be that vindictive lying ex.

[00:20:33] I was perfect to that man.

[00:20:34] I poured endless love into our marriage.

[00:20:37] I spoiled him.

[00:20:38] I was a best friend,

[00:20:38] and a therapist and probably his biggest hype man.

[00:20:41] And if he can leave that,

[00:20:42] he can leave anything.

[00:20:44] There's no bad issues.

[00:20:45] I want to see her eat,

[00:20:47] just not at my table type of thing,

[00:20:49] but I'm treating her just as I do like him.

[00:20:52] They're nothing but a stranger to me.

[00:20:54] He doesn't have to go on the birth certificate.

[00:20:56] And really after the divorce and court dates,

[00:20:58] I don't think I'll allow either of them to be a second thought in my head.

[00:21:02] Another post from OP says,

[00:21:04] hi,

[00:21:04] it's been a while since I've posted.

[00:21:05] I mean,

[00:21:06] last time I posted I had swollen ankles,

[00:21:08] waddles,

[00:21:09] thought every little cramp was a contraction,

[00:21:10] and felt like life was falling apart.

[00:21:13] I want to thank everyone who reached out,

[00:21:14] even months after the fact,

[00:21:16] just to check in on a stranger.

[00:21:17] My daughter is here.

[00:21:19] For privacy,

[00:21:19] I'm going to leave out her date of birth,

[00:21:21] as she was six pounds,

[00:21:23] two ounces,

[00:21:23] and the most beautiful head of hair I've seen.

[00:21:25] She's now got the hairstyle of Danny DeVito.

[00:21:28] My original posts are still up in case anyone is looking at this with puzzlement.

[00:21:33] But to say things have been rough would be an understatement.

[00:21:36] He showed up at the hospital.

[00:21:38] Thankfully,

[00:21:38] everyone was aware and hospital staff handled it properly and perfectly,

[00:21:42] and I was able to focus on labor and delivery.

[00:21:44] Unfortunately,

[00:21:45] the stress of that alone took an already hectic moment in time and amped it up.

[00:21:49] But things could have been so much worse,

[00:21:51] and I'm highly thankful they were not.

[00:21:54] Right now,

[00:21:55] I've got about 10 different CPS calls.

[00:21:57] They came to my house on four occasions.

[00:21:59] His family and him have filed for an emergency custody hearing,

[00:22:02] and due to leaving the state with my daughter,

[00:22:05] that did give him a foot in the door.

[00:22:07] It seems the protective order isn't really helping in the matter.

[00:22:10] I'm still on maternity leave,

[00:22:11] so thankfully my focus has fully been on my daughter

[00:22:14] and collecting all the evidence to make sure he doesn't get any custody,

[00:22:17] other than possibly supervised visits for an hour.

[00:22:20] My main concern is,

[00:22:21] if he doesn't get any custody,

[00:22:23] those parents may do the grandparent route.

[00:22:25] I wish it was an update to say I'm kicking motherhood's ass and taking names,

[00:22:29] but most of the time I'm feeling like a burnt out blob.

[00:22:33] I'm in therapy,

[00:22:34] and the doctors are keeping an eye on postpartum depression.

[00:22:38] Yet my doctor thinks a giant hemorrhoid,

[00:22:39] X,

[00:22:40] is the cause instead.

[00:22:42] Don't have an update on the girlfriend of his.

[00:22:44] I've kept the dogs.

[00:22:45] I think they love little one just as much as I do.

[00:22:47] I'm excited and anxious to see

[00:22:49] where the next chapter of my life will lead me.

[00:22:52] Someone says to OP,

[00:22:54] don't worry about grandparents' rights.

[00:22:56] OP says,

[00:22:56] thank you for this.

[00:22:57] The rational side of my brain knows that they have a slim to none chance of getting anywhere.

[00:23:01] Yet the exhausted,

[00:23:03] overstimulated hormones all over the place kept going.

[00:23:06] What if?

[00:23:07] So anytime that fear creeps back in,

[00:23:09] I'll come to your comment and read it a few times.

[00:23:12] OP posted another post and says,

[00:23:15] Well, honestly,

[00:23:16] she's been here for a bit,

[00:23:17] but still a newbie at life.

[00:23:19] She was born with a full head of black hair,

[00:23:21] six pounds,

[00:23:22] two ounces,

[00:23:23] and was alert from the very start.

[00:23:25] I made an update on the true of my chest,

[00:23:27] but making a small one just in case it gets taken down.

[00:23:30] CPS has been called numerous times and came out for a few visits.

[00:23:34] Everything from,

[00:23:35] I was living in filth,

[00:23:36] to,

[00:23:36] I was leaving the baby home alone,

[00:23:38] to,

[00:23:39] I was addicted to meth,

[00:23:40] has been said,

[00:23:41] and investigated and proved wrong.

[00:23:43] I did leave the state,

[00:23:44] and that got his foot in the door for an emergency custody battle,

[00:23:47] which will be coming up soon.

[00:23:48] The protective order was a joke,

[00:23:50] and has been unhelpful.

[00:23:51] The man showed up to the hospital while I was in labor,

[00:23:54] but thankfully,

[00:23:55] the hospital staff handled it perfectly.

[00:23:57] The cops not so much,

[00:23:58] but didn't expect it.

[00:24:00] I think his parents are the biggest push in the custody thing,

[00:24:03] but I don't think he'd get granted more than a few supervised visits.

[00:24:06] My main concern is if,

[00:24:08] that happens as grandparents go in after grandparent rights.

[00:24:11] To protect their reputation is highly likely they will.

[00:24:15] Unfortunately,

[00:24:15] I don't have an update on his girlfriend,

[00:24:18] but I did keep the dogs,

[00:24:19] aka the gruesome twosome,

[00:24:21] and I think they love the little one just as much as I do.

[00:24:24] Thank you all for caring and messaging and checking in months later.

[00:24:26] It means more than I can say.

[00:24:29] Someone says to OP,

[00:24:30] how did he find out you're in labor,

[00:24:32] so he could show up at the hospital?

[00:24:34] Do you have a mole feeding him info?

[00:24:36] OP says,

[00:24:36] I'm assuming so, yes.

[00:24:38] Most likely a co-worker,

[00:24:39] or at least that is my best guess.

[00:24:41] A commenter on why they claim to have emergency custody says,

[00:24:44] I think they probably tried to file for emergency custody,

[00:24:47] claiming that she was kidnapping the baby by moving out of state.

[00:24:51] OP replies in,

[00:24:52] exactly what happened?

[00:24:53] Is it kidnapping,

[00:24:54] fleeing the state?

[00:24:55] From what I understand from my lawyer,

[00:24:57] that won't hold,

[00:24:58] but I'm required to do a paternity test,

[00:25:00] since he's not on the birth certificate.

[00:25:02] Why he gets this chance,

[00:25:04] I have no clue.

[00:25:05] It's exhausting,

[00:25:06] and I think it's a control scare tactic to keep his family happy.

[00:25:10] Going to use this comment just to add in two other questions from this post that I can't find.

[00:25:14] Someone mentioned an air tag.

[00:25:16] I called a garage,

[00:25:18] explained the situation,

[00:25:19] they're going to have me drop it off,

[00:25:20] and go over it with a fine tooth comb.

[00:25:22] So,

[00:25:22] if the person that mentioned that is reading this,

[00:25:25] a big,

[00:25:25] big thank you.

[00:25:26] As for the co-workers,

[00:25:27] slash someone leaking information,

[00:25:29] I've stayed silent ever since.

[00:25:31] Finally,

[00:25:32] I cannot get them in trouble with false accusations with CPS,

[00:25:35] because they're making anonymous reports.

[00:25:37] I know it's them.

[00:25:39] My lawyer knows it's them.

[00:25:40] Heck,

[00:25:41] at this point,

[00:25:41] the caseworker probably knows it's them,

[00:25:43] but legally,

[00:25:43] it's anonymous,

[00:25:44] and they're just declined saying,

[00:25:46] slash reporting anything.

[00:25:48] Pictures of his destruction,

[00:25:49] Shinopi says,

[00:25:50] thank you so,

[00:25:51] so much.

[00:25:51] I've not kept the pictures personally,

[00:25:53] but my lawyer has them.

[00:25:54] Police documents,

[00:25:55] the texts,

[00:25:55] the voicemails.

[00:25:56] I couldn't physically keep them in my home,

[00:25:58] because I would just look at them over and over again,

[00:26:01] trying to figure out what I missed,

[00:26:02] where it went wrong,

[00:26:03] what I could have done to prevent it.

[00:26:05] It made my mental health spiral.

[00:26:07] Neither one of us,

[00:26:09] lawyer or I,

[00:26:09] believe that he has a chance when it comes to custody,

[00:26:12] but neither one of us thought he'd get his foot in the door,

[00:26:15] as far as he has either.

[00:26:16] Right now,

[00:26:17] he's focusing on the baby,

[00:26:18] the dogs,

[00:26:19] and keeping my physical and mental health in a good place.

[00:26:22] So thankful for Reddit and everyone that checks in,

[00:26:24] because it's been therapeutic in a way.

[00:26:27] Opie then posted in Dad for a minute as her last post,

[00:26:30] and says,

[00:26:31] In all reality,

[00:26:32] I need some dad advice.

[00:26:34] Life has been hectic,

[00:26:35] crazy,

[00:26:35] scary,

[00:26:36] defeating.

[00:26:36] I'm still going and keeping my head up,

[00:26:38] because I just had a baby,

[00:26:40] and won't let her down.

[00:26:41] A kind Redditor sent me over here,

[00:26:43] because I'm looking at,

[00:26:44] most importantly,

[00:26:45] the safest,

[00:26:46] but also the easiest way to sell things online.

[00:26:48] Every place seems to have its downfall.

[00:26:50] eBay seems like the best,

[00:26:52] but I'm unsure.

[00:26:53] Craigslist seems simple,

[00:26:54] fast,

[00:26:54] easy,

[00:26:55] but scammers,

[00:26:55] and then meeting someone online.

[00:26:57] Where's the best place to meet?

[00:26:58] Is cash best?

[00:26:59] Should I take a friend?

[00:27:00] Makes me question my sanity.

[00:27:02] A gaming store seems hopeful,

[00:27:04] and the safest,

[00:27:05] but I've also heard that they give you bottom dollar

[00:27:06] for anything you can bring in.

[00:27:08] Oh yeah,

[00:27:09] they will.

[00:27:09] This is jumbled and a mess,

[00:27:11] but if you see this,

[00:27:12] and have any kind,

[00:27:13] helpful,

[00:27:14] so desperately needed,

[00:27:15] that advice,

[00:27:16] I need it.

[00:27:16] A dad joke wouldn't hurt either.

[00:27:18] You want a dad joke?

[00:27:19] I'll give you a dad joke.

[00:27:21] What do you call two bananas on the floor?

[00:27:23] A pair of slippers.

[00:27:26] Oh my God,

[00:27:27] I'm so pleased with that one.

[00:27:28] But just carving my mind back to the title,

[00:27:31] and calling him a monster,

[00:27:32] and that is absolutely what he is.

[00:27:34] I just,

[00:27:35] it's just so frustrating,

[00:27:36] they just wouldn't let you,

[00:27:37] leave you alone to get on with your life.

[00:27:39] The whole family is,

[00:27:40] you know,

[00:27:40] the in-laws as well,

[00:27:42] or the ex-in-laws should I say.

[00:27:43] And I was carving my mind back to,

[00:27:45] the sudden flip after eight years together,

[00:27:48] that he suddenly changed during the pregnancy like that,

[00:27:50] but there was lots of comments saying,

[00:27:51] you know,

[00:27:52] that he probably didn't just suddenly change.

[00:27:54] It's been,

[00:27:55] you know,

[00:27:56] slowly happening over time.

[00:27:58] And,

[00:27:58] and once she was pregnant,

[00:28:00] then the mask can come completely off.

[00:28:02] And I just find that absolutely terrifying.

[00:28:06] And the parents backing up this as well.

[00:28:08] Oh,

[00:28:09] it's just,

[00:28:09] it's just sickening.

[00:28:10] I'm so glad you're away from him at the moment.

[00:28:14] You've got protective orders where you can,

[00:28:16] but I really hope that one day you can completely sever ties with this person and the ex-in-laws as well.

[00:28:22] You truly deserve some peace because dealing with all that with a newborn at the same time,

[00:28:26] everything you've gone through and still going through is,

[00:28:30] it must be just exhausting.

[00:28:32] So with that said,

[00:28:33] Opie,

[00:28:33] I really do wish you all the love and all the best going forward for you,

[00:28:37] your little one,

[00:28:37] and the gruesome twosome as well.

[00:28:40] But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:28:43] What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:28:46] Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:28:49] That's just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories.

[00:28:53] Your love,

[00:28:54] your support,

[00:28:55] your time always means the absolute world to me.

[00:28:58] Thank you so,

[00:28:59] so much.

[00:28:59] And I will see you in the next one.

[00:29:01] Take care and much love.