My Fiancee Wants Me To Forgive My Family After They Stole My Inheritance r/Relationships

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[00:00:51] I Subred Etten says, I 25 male refused to forgive my family sisters 33 female 31 female

[00:00:59] and my parents 63 female and 60 male until they pay me back my inheritance. They spent on

[00:01:06] themselves. I 25 male and the youngest of three siblings 33 female and 31 female. My

[00:01:16] parents 63 female and 60 male are owners of a grocery store that was passed down through my

[00:01:21] father's side of the family for generations. My grandparents on both my dad and mum's side left me

[00:01:27] and my siblings each a college slash trust fund of 100k. Each of my sisters blew through their

[00:01:34] money and dropped out of college. Both of them became single mothers to my three nieces,

[00:01:40] and female 8 female and 7 female and came back to work for my parents store.

[00:01:46] I was the only kid who didn't work for my parents business as I got a job as a landscaper

[00:01:51] for the summers and after school throughout my entire high school years and saved up about 20k.

[00:01:57] I got accepted into college on a partial scholarship and I was beyond thrilled because

[00:02:02] I knew I had a great opportunity to leave college debt free and own my own home by the time I was 22.

[00:02:09] Just as my sisters did when they turned 18, I asked my parents to turn over access to the trust

[00:02:14] as I wanted to have the money under my control just like my sisters did. That's when my parents

[00:02:19] told me we would discuss this a dinner tonight. So at the dinner my whole family was there including my

[00:02:26] nieces. When it was time to talk about my trust my dad and mum asked me if I would consider

[00:02:31] hauling off on access in the trust for two years as they had to use some of the money to cover

[00:02:35] some of the healthcare and living cost to their grandkids and also pay off a lawsuit that my sister

[00:02:40] Gloria received for a DUI. I asked how much they used and my mum said there was currently 5k left

[00:02:47] in the account so they spent 95k and none of it went to me. My dad said that you need to just

[00:02:53] think about your family and understand that we need your help in this request. I said isn't it great

[00:02:59] that everyone benefited from this money besides the person it was intended for? Gloria and Lori got

[00:03:05] to go to college and travel the world with their money. While with my money I got to pay for all

[00:03:10] their mistakes. My last words to my family were that this was not a request as the decision was

[00:03:16] already made and I moved out and left. I still went to college as I had a partial scholarship

[00:03:22] and over those years I used money I had in my savings to start my own landscaping business

[00:03:27] which employees six guys and we are doing great. I never got a chance to spend any of the money my

[00:03:33] grandparents left for me as my parents never built back up the trust. Two years ago I found out

[00:03:38] from my lawyer when I sent a formal request to access the trust that the current balance was

[00:03:43] $3456.13. Less than 5k my parents told me about. My sisters and parents have tried to reconnect

[00:03:54] through the years but I have always resent every gift, letter and invitation have sent me back

[00:03:59] to them. I'm getting married next month and fiance wants to meet my family and help me close this

[00:04:04] chapter in my life. My fiance wants me to forgive and move on as I haven't spoken to them in years

[00:04:10] but read it am I in the wrong for telling my fiance sorry but I cannot move on from this.

[00:04:16] Now I don't know the full legalities of a trust etc all I can compare it to and obviously I'm

[00:04:21] basing the UK so again it might be completely different is when I was dealing with my father's

[00:04:27] estate and how I was told about the legalities of it. I need to ensure whatever money is there

[00:04:33] needs to be split equally between the people in the will. If I don't I will be legally responsible

[00:04:40] for that so in some ways I'm quite surprised your lawyer hasn't said anything along those lines

[00:04:45] that they are legally liable to give you that money again I don't know the legal side of a trust

[00:04:52] compared to what I dealt with. I think a fiance saying that they want you to forgive and move on

[00:04:57] because you haven't spoken to them in years doesn't even sound like they've apologized

[00:05:03] and when your parents said about holding of access to the trust for two years my assumption then

[00:05:09] is that they was going to top it back up which they haven't done which I feel like if they

[00:05:14] were sorry they would have tried to make it up to you in some kind of way they would have actually

[00:05:18] done what they was going to and start filling that money back up passing you that money

[00:05:23] that is owed to you. But Lamirk says someone still has a hundred K from me no shot in hell they get

[00:05:28] to stay in my life you are all adults obviously this is just my opinion but there is more than enough

[00:05:35] reason to not trust these people in your life we would ever get that money back and the fact that

[00:05:39] the amount now has gone down instead of up when they promised to eventually pay you back says they

[00:05:44] also lied to you good on you for moving on without them and doing well he did enough for them

[00:05:50] without your consent already side note I'll redrain what is left there if you can this still your money

[00:05:57] but last baseload says tell your fiance that you understand they think they're doing something good

[00:06:02] but that you need them to respect your decisions regarding your family and understand

[00:06:06] that pushing you to reconcile is not what you want and not what you need and that this is the

[00:06:11] only time you'll discuss it with them and warn them to never try to go behind your back to

[00:06:15] contact them and ambush you with them because if they do you will divorce and cut them off too

[00:06:21] Opie says trust me I've told my fiancee in very explicit language that if she ever decided

[00:06:26] to surprise or force every union with me and my family there will consider that as an act of betrayal

[00:06:32] and she would not be forgiven it's just seen if I do not even talk to my own family she knows

[00:06:37] I'm completely serious she's tried and currently is trying to get me to soften my stance but

[00:06:42] I'm not open to reconciliation with words at the moment once my trust fund is back funded

[00:06:47] where it was eight years ago then I will reconcile with words right now actions do all the talking for

[00:06:53] me learns from experience as you can't forgive if someone hasn't asked for forgiveness and sincerely

[00:06:59] apologized until there's some acknowledgement that they basically stole from you in a set up

[00:07:04] some means to start paying you back I'd shine them on life's too short to deal with selfish people

[00:07:09] you can't trust and it's ten times worse when those people are your family Opie says me and my

[00:07:15] parents spoke two years ago after I hired a lawyer to actually sue them they apologize and explain

[00:07:20] that they had to make some tough decisions and would hope I would give them the opportunity to make

[00:07:25] it right I of course said you guys had the opportunity over the past three years at the time and

[00:07:30] my trust fund is still not back at what you promised it would be they said times are hard and

[00:07:35] they're working on it I asked as my parents how do you justify sacrificing my future to pay for

[00:07:41] their other kids mistakes and why was I asked before they made the decision to empty my account

[00:07:47] they really could not give a good answer I cried basically said you did a great thing for your

[00:07:51] daughters but a horrible thing to your only son basically left me on my own to figure it out

[00:07:56] we've not spoken since and then there was a bit of a string of comments the WA Marma says can you

[00:08:02] put a lean on your parents business Opie says I would not do that as the business

[00:08:06] employs a lot of people who truly need that money to survive two years ago I started the process

[00:08:12] of filing a lawsuit and hired a lawyer in everything but ultimately I put the suit on hold as the

[00:08:16] pandemic and the economy was affecting everyone really bad and blessed that my business has flourished

[00:08:22] the way it has to allow me to afford to make those kind of decisions three this replies that

[00:08:27] said the lean wouldn't shut the business down would make sure you got paid first out of their

[00:08:31] estate when they pass if they went bankrupt or if they try to sell the company Opie says yes you

[00:08:36] are correct nevertheless I want to keep this away from the store if that makes sense the business

[00:08:42] cannot be sold without majority family approval the lean is very much possible but I do not want

[00:08:47] to go that route as for me that is the last option you have some employees who have worked for

[00:08:51] that store for 40 years think small town america family grocery store and notorious dad replies

[00:08:58] that saying yes you're being naive your family has already conspired once had a preview of your

[00:09:02] fair share of your inheritance selling the business with majority family approval means they

[00:09:07] can make a decision without you keeping you in the dark until the sale is approved and denying

[00:09:12] you participation you'd be without any share of the store sale and without recovering their theft

[00:09:17] I put a lean on the business including the property that will prevent the sale and assure that

[00:09:22] the debt is resolved I'll also have them put their shares or interest in the business in your name

[00:09:27] and agree and writing to return their interest once your inheritance is restored again says if they

[00:09:33] draw away you can look into garnishing their wages and a final reply from Opie that says gen legally

[00:09:39] I can force the issue like a hammer however the collateral damage is not so unready to assume

[00:09:44] responsibility for why do I have to be the bad guy to force him to do the right thing a struggle

[00:09:50] immensely over the moral question to force this issue in the cause the store has nothing to do

[00:09:55] with their actions and I know it sounds naive but I've made the moral decision to try all costs

[00:10:00] to keep the store out of this for now some of my close friends family members work for the store

[00:10:04] to this day my family knows this and I believe this is why this is dragged on for so long

[00:10:10] side note knowing that the family can take away a giant 85k while working for the store

[00:10:15] all additional profits must be invested back into the business so Opie does come back into

[00:10:22] update their post he said so much has happened that I think the best way to do this is to put this

[00:10:27] in key points and answer in the comments thank you to everyone who sent me direct messages and

[00:10:32] wrote me in the comments the thread was locked after four hours of it being posted so blew up

[00:10:36] fast and I know everybody did not get a chance to comment last time as a result my inbox was flooded

[00:10:43] so wanted to give the best update I could because so many of you took an interest in my story

[00:10:48] what has happened since beyond say admitted to speaking with my family on facebook messenger

[00:10:53] and they also spoke in person when she said they met each other in a restaurant

[00:10:58] happened a month ago he answered it was very emotional I told my fiancee I'm extremely

[00:11:04] disappointed that she withheld this information from me for a month he answered told me she felt

[00:11:08] guilty and afraid to tell me because she thought her might break up with her and cans were the

[00:11:12] wedding if I found out she wanted to wait till after the wedding to tell me however yesterday my

[00:11:17] mum called her directly begging her to help me reunite our family she missed so much of my life

[00:11:23] she doesn't want to miss another milestone the wedding she wants to know she has violated my trust

[00:11:29] and gave me the most heart meltings and serapology I ever heard in my life and asked for forgiveness

[00:11:35] she even had her parents ask me to forgive her and not cancel the wedding a mom and dad told me they

[00:11:41] loved me and hope I could move past this a dad loves me literally has a picture of me in his office

[00:11:48] just me and him lol introduces me as a son for the past two years he cried and said he doesn't

[00:11:54] want to lose me as a son I forgave my fiance sisters came to my business with my nieces and

[00:12:01] desperately wanted to talk sisters deeply regret their part in the decisions that were made on their

[00:12:06] behalf want to be a family again they understand my position and anger but they miss me and want

[00:12:12] me back in their lives my nieces also asked why I didn't come around anymore and at my mad at them

[00:12:18] sisters explained this has destroyed our parents marriages it has now come out that my

[00:12:23] mum apparently spent the majority of the money without my dad knowing and then when he found out

[00:12:28] my mum wanted dad to say it was both of their decision because she believes if it came out

[00:12:32] that it was her that decided by herself and not my dad that I would never forgive her no matter what

[00:12:38] and would the sonar because I always accused her of playing favorites to be honest she is right

[00:12:42] I would have disowned her my mum pleaded with my dad to cover for her decision to empty my fund

[00:12:49] dad was furious but decided to say he and mum decided to spend the money

[00:12:54] dad now resents our mum because he no longer has a relationship with his only son

[00:12:58] he only hears from his friends how great a relationship me and father-in-law have

[00:13:03] I call father-in-law bad he calls me his son

[00:13:06] dad told my mother either she fixes this or he is done with her and he's telling me the truth

[00:13:12] I told my sisters that I love them and my nieces and I do not hate them however they

[00:13:16] helped rob me of a very important gift that our grandparents gave each of us and I missed out on

[00:13:21] life experiences they got to experience and I did not it's like they stole my last gift that

[00:13:27] our grandparents left for me we all cried and I accepted their apology but I told them

[00:13:32] I do not know how to let go of this resentment I feel towards them I let them know our relationship

[00:13:37] all take time to rebuild I asked them to set up a meeting with just me and dad and not my mum

[00:13:44] I met with my dad alone my dad was shocked that I requested the meeting he looked defeated

[00:13:49] and asked to speak first my dad told me he's been depressed for the last few years and feels like

[00:13:55] he truly failed me as a father and he knows he betrayed me and as a father he must take that to his

[00:14:00] grave that he is the reason his son hates him he said he's extremely jealous of the relationship I

[00:14:05] have with my father-in-law and he just started crying for like three minutes straight I told him

[00:14:11] my note was mum who decided to spend the money I told him I understand why he didn't throw

[00:14:15] mum to the bus but he deeply hurt me by covering mum's decision this long I told him I love him

[00:14:21] and said he doesn't owe me anything anymore he's done owing mum's debt we both cried and hugged

[00:14:27] for like five minutes I invited him my sisters and my nieces over to dinner at my place that night

[00:14:33] without mum I let my sisters and my dad know if they came to dinner with mum with them

[00:14:38] that this would be the last time we speak my mum clearly found out about the reunion without her

[00:14:43] and wanted to speak I refused a request and told her please bring a check for 100k if you want to talk

[00:14:50] my wedding is on September 3rd and I have since invited everyone but mum my sisters want me to hear

[00:14:56] mum's side of the story my dad has said he is done covering for my mum's decisions

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[00:16:07] my fiance is happy and supports my decision 100% even though I know she wants me to meet with

[00:16:13] my mother she just got forgiven herself she doesn't want to push read it should I meet with my

[00:16:18] mum before or after she hands me the check for 100k and i'm not sure how I felt at the end of this

[00:16:23] one it's like a very very forgiving person clearly in this and it's clear that the mum was the main

[00:16:30] one in the wrong within this story but they it seems like they've all had some sort of part to play

[00:16:36] in it and no one seems to have taken any responsibility for the decisions that happened in the past

[00:16:42] either no one's you know no one said oh yeah we'll get what we can to or anything like that it's

[00:16:47] just sort of like forgive us let's move on let's crack on with this now let's move past it just felt

[00:16:52] like throughout all there was no effort at all you know how many years has it been was it six or

[00:16:59] seven or something like that and not even a penny's been put back into that into that trust in fact

[00:17:06] some was taken out i know people struggling etc etc but if you're trying to rebuild anything with

[00:17:13] your son who's got no contact with you surely you'd try to fix the situation that was created

[00:17:20] rather than do the complete opposite of it but i don't know what do you guys make of this

[00:17:25] situation let us know your thoughts down in the comments below let's move on to another story

[00:17:33] and some people been asking for a couple little stories from the entire tool people subreddit and

[00:17:37] I saw this one today it's a UK based story it's about being cute which is like a DIY hardware

[00:17:43] story if you're like that's tools paints gardening stuff all the usual stuff right it's from

[00:17:49] averagely brilliant who says strange behavior in being cute i went to my local DIY store to get

[00:17:57] a few things yesterday when i got to their checkout there was a man in front of me explaining

[00:18:02] something to the checkout woman i didn't hear what was said but the gist of it was that he wanted

[00:18:07] her to save his place in the queue while he went and got something he had obviously forgotten

[00:18:12] as he walked away the woman shrugged and pointed at the queue as if to suggest she couldn't hold up

[00:18:17] other customers for him he walked away leaving his items on the conveyor and a checkout woman

[00:18:22] gestured me to come forward i paid for my items very quickly and as i was waiting for the receipt

[00:18:28] chummy returned chummy as i walked away he said to anyone who might want to listen well either i

[00:18:36] lost my place in the queue or people chose not to listen implying that the entire queue should have

[00:18:41] been held up for his majesty i nearly turned around to tell him to calm down and be nice but

[00:18:47] i suddenly got a very real sense saying something would not have been helpful as i left them

[00:18:53] returned to my car he hadn't come out of the store i wonder whether he made an enormous fuss about

[00:18:58] it and demanded to see the manager it's getting worse this unearned sense of entitlement

[00:19:05] or self-importance seems to be growing like a malignancy in the UK people have lost all sense of

[00:19:11] courtesy and fair play i noticed it on the roads especially people do some really stupid things that

[00:19:17] have no grounding in common sense naive adds a similar story on the back of that and says had a

[00:19:24] similar yesterday in little which is just like a supermarket i joined the shortest queue woman with

[00:19:29] trolley was pottering about the lane looked like she was still shopping little has a space between

[00:19:35] the shopping aisles and lane and checkout she then rams the trolley up beside me in a very loud

[00:19:40] voice she just walked in front of me and took my place i ignored her she wasn't in the queue

[00:19:45] she was looking at the queue while in the aisle and looking at crisps or chips in the us

[00:19:50] she continued about her place being stolen while i was served and is probably talking about it now

[00:19:56] in general people have become rude and aggressive to customer service and others even

[00:20:00] walking down a pathy i'm not looking where i'm going because i'm on my phone watching tiktok

[00:20:05] brigade the parent given a baby or a toddler a phone so they don't have to engage with them

[00:20:09] and blare out kokumalat and dribble there is an epidemic of a rudeness and me me culture

[00:20:17] it is really sad people just don't care hope you reply saying it reminds me of a time i went up to

[00:20:23] an empty tail and started emptying my groceries onto the conveyor a voice from behind said

[00:20:28] what's your game it left about six or seven items stored on a large bulkhead built next to

[00:20:33] and high above the conveyor usually used for items that people decided not to buy when they got

[00:20:38] to the till he grabbed them and put them in front of my stuff on the conveyor i said why did you leave

[00:20:44] him up there if you were coming back belt was empty he said nothing after he noticed that his

[00:20:50] watch your game had attracted a bit more attention than he wanted this was a few years ago when

[00:20:55] was probably the first time i'd experienced this kind of thing the difference now is that people

[00:21:00] are less inclined to back down and more willing to escalate one weird interaction that i had and

[00:21:06] i may have told this one before it was around sort of christmas time and i don't know if it's in a

[00:21:11] shop called Tesco which is like a local supermarket you know food or what sort of stuff it was sort

[00:21:17] of like the week up to leading to christmas and now people are doing some of their christmas shop

[00:21:21] in like they weren't getting the complete fresh stuff so there's quite a lot of people in there

[00:21:26] looking around and for some reason there was like like pre-packaged salmon slices

[00:21:32] and there was a crowd i mean like a proper crowd at the very end of the aisle there's like a little

[00:21:37] friduna at the end that had the salmon in and they were waiting for this person to come out and

[00:21:42] restock and when this person come out the people were like going into his trolley grabbing it out

[00:21:48] they were showing it each other and i just like what the fuck man it was so weird to see

[00:21:54] it just reminded me of like those videos you see online about like black friday sales when people

[00:21:59] run through the door and they're like ripping the TVs off each other and chucking them about it

[00:22:06] which is crazy and you could just hear get off my fucking salmon there was a whole bunch of drama

[00:22:13] after it like it went on like the local facebook group and it was like people need to be more

[00:22:20] conserate of others i didn't get my salmon i better have to go to another supermarket now anyway

[00:22:28] oh man the world is just wild isn't it anyway i don't know where i was going with that story

[00:22:34] what do you guys make of this situation if you had yourself any weird little interactions in

[00:22:40] the supermarket don't forget to let us know down in the comments below and just a huge thank you

[00:22:45] for the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories you'll love your support your

[00:22:49] time always means the absolute world to me so thank you so so much and hopefully i'll see you

[00:22:54] in the next one take care and much love

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[00:23:37] a world of laughs by downloading the amazon music app for free or go to amazon.com slash comedy ad free

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