I Ran From My Abusive Ex But I Swear He's Watching Me

[00:00:01] [SPEAKER_01] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories. And if you do love a Reddit story, why not consider that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now today's first story comes from Mysterious Ruin from the True Off My Chest subreddit. And it says, I ran from my abusive ex. And I think he found me.

[00:00:28] [SPEAKER_01] And just giving a trigger warning on this that contains domestic violence, stalking and harassment as well. So if you do want to skip it, please feel free to do so. Timestamps are always down in the description and along the timeline below. Thank you. I, female 27, ran from my abusive ex when I was four months pregnant. I got into a different state. I legally changed my name and I didn't name my child the name we had agreed on. He didn't know my social or my ID number.

[00:00:56] [SPEAKER_01] The only way he had of tracking me down was my name, but that was gone. Long gone. I had to sign into domestic violence safe haven shelters to get into my own place and find a job. I'd built a great life for me and my child. I'd planned running from him a little over a year because it felt like my only way out. He would always find me and drag me back. He made it out to if I don't take my depression meds, I act out and tried to harm myself. The police ended up believing him and became of no help.

[00:01:26] [SPEAKER_01] They brushed off all four of my domestic violence calls as simple disagreements. I'd saved up just a little over 10k in my bank account my mom had set up to help me get away and come see her so he wouldn't find out about how much money I really had. My dad helped mostly by putting in a lot more than what I could. He would get suspicious and ask where all the money was going and I would pass it off as bills.

[00:01:50] [SPEAKER_01] In my new town, I've made very few people aware of my situation. There's people that could help if something was to happen. These past two months, I've been being watched by someone unknown. He's always wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses, but I could swear on my life, it's my ex. I ended up leaving work a few times due to having panic attacks from seeing the guy. He never interacts with me, only my co-workers. He waits until I'm out of earshot to speak to order and he gives different names for his orders.

[00:02:20] [SPEAKER_01] My co-workers have thought it was strange because he comes in almost every other week for a week straight for the past two months using different names. After this, I went to the police station to speak to one of the people I made friends with and is aware of my situation. He said he would have patrol officers drive by my house and keep a lookout. I've never seen him around my house or drive by it. I started getting letters in the mail that I believe is from him. No one signs them with their name. The envelope only ever has my old name and new address on it.

[00:02:50] [SPEAKER_01] The letters consist of him saying, I love you and miss you. It never goes into detail about who is writing them. I took them to the police station to the one I'm friends with. He told me I need to find another place to stay for a while and file for a restraining order. I made a fake account and messaged one of my old friends. They said they was glad to hear from me. They are glad I'm okay. And that he'd been trying to report us as missing, which I'd already knew. That he's still there working his old job.

[00:03:18] [SPEAKER_01] But he does go on weekend long trips and nobody knows where he's going on them. What's keeping us from becoming a missing person's case is my mum. Police had contacted her and she told them everything. She showed them proof that I was in fact alive and doing well. She explained why I ran and she said she wouldn't disclose my location. They ended up contacting me to confirm the story my mum gave them. The police finally after all this time believed me. They asked me if I wanted to come back to file charges or a restraining order.

[00:03:48] [SPEAKER_01] I told them no. I want to stay where I'm at and to stay as far as I can from him. Yesterday, I'd missed my mailman. And he left a slip that I need to sign for a letter. I haven't ordered or requested anything to have signed for. I'm not on any government benefits or having any court case going on. I reactivated the fake Facebook and messaged my old friend again. She said she hasn't heard anything but she'll ask. I keep it active and she messaged me early this morning.

[00:04:15] [SPEAKER_01] She said that there is some talk that he knows where I'm at. And he's thinking about going to court to take me for custody. I asked her if I would get it via mail and would have to sign for it. She said she isn't sure that I would have to ask the post office. I left the letter there all yesterday at the post office instead of calling them and going to get it. I don't think I want to go pick it up. I don't want to face the possible truth that he has found me. I don't want to go back to that town. I don't want to go back to my old life.

[00:04:42] [SPEAKER_01] I don't want to relive the nightmare that I had finally escaped. I don't know what to do at this point. Edit. I just want to say thank you first for all your kind words and advice you've all gave me. After I made this post, I went to work. When I got to work, they said a guy came in looking for me. They described my ex. They kept telling him I don't work there and if he comes back, they'll have him arrested because apparently he threw a big fit when they said I don't work there. I was given permission to leave to seek legal help.

[00:05:12] [SPEAKER_01] Went to my friend that's a cop and got me in contact with a few lawyers. I'd spoken to one and he's taken my case. He filed stalking, harassment and domestic violence against him. He has also filed a CPO. They issued a warrant and cops are combing the area to find him. They have all his pictures and name. They aren't going to stop until they have him in custody. I sat and cried because this has been my life for the past four, almost five years since I ran that he's trying to ruin.

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_01] Where I live, they rule in favor of the mother when it comes to domestic violence. Apparently since I left, he was with someone that files charges against him for domestic violence and it got dropped. Thank you so much for all the kind words and advice. I appreciate it beyond words, I could say. And you can tell from OP's edit, OP was getting a lot of advice to, you know, report this to the police, getting a restraining order, all that kind of thing, which OP obviously started the process of.

[00:06:07] [SPEAKER_01] 11 days later, OP came back in and said, here's a long awaited update. He was caught at late night slash early in the morning when he ran a stoplight heading back home. He was processed and sat in his cell waiting to appear in front of the judge on his warrant for domestic violence, which was that following Thursday. When he was arrested and processed, they served him with a CPO. As he was being processed, he obviously got a call. He had called his dad and told him everything.

[00:06:34] [SPEAKER_01] His dad told him he didn't raise a woman beater and he wasn't bailing him out. They also saw that he had another warrant that he'd been issued a few days prior back home. Apparently, the girl he was with left him while he was away and pressed domestic violence charges against him as well. I'm not sure what they'd do with him now, but he has charges in two different places or how that will work. He had appeared in front of the judge on Thursday and said they were holding him on a $100,000 bond because they considered him dangerous and an extreme flight risk.

[00:07:03] [SPEAKER_01] He sat there until following Tuesday when he was released to the other police department that they had contacted to let them know. He's now currently up there waiting for his bond to be set. They said he's most likely not getting one from them, but will sit there. He was made to serve 30 days in jail on his warrant back home. Cops had said he probably won't be let loose, doing both trials due to the circumstances surrounding his case and him being extremely dangerous while being a flight risk.

[00:07:30] [SPEAKER_01] They're going to do their best to keep him in jail until his convictions in both cases. Yes, CPO issues against him in both. I asked them to keep my name redacted out of everything just in case this breaks to the media. I've purchased a gun, bear spray and other forms of protection. They have moved and still in contact with a cop that I was friends with. For the first time in a long time, I finally feel free and I can live without fear. Sorry for making you guys wait for an update.

[00:07:58] [SPEAKER_01] So, it was 11 days later, again, that OP came in and says, I heard that they have found witnesses to his abuse that can account for the other girl's abuse. Since this came to light, he has changed his plea in both cases to guilty. They aren't going to have a trial for either of the cases, just a court date for sentencing. I believe he knew he was fucked when witnesses was mentioned. He has gotten sloppy with his abuse the last few years. I hope he rots.

[00:08:24] [SPEAKER_01] Six and a half months later, OP comes in with what was titled their final update, but there is another post as well. It said, This is what he got for each charge.

[00:08:53] [SPEAKER_01] Two counts of felony stalking, two years. A year for each charge. Two counts of harassment, four months. Two months for each charge. Two counts of domestic violence, eight months. Four months for each charge. Two counts of felony assault, four years. Two counts for each charge. One count of child endangerment, 180 days. One count of a resisting arrest, 90 days. He's to serve them consecutively.

[00:09:22] [SPEAKER_01] They didn't punish him with a max sentence on the felonies because he pled guilty and waived a trial, just took the sentencing. They wanted this done and over. The sentencing took a little longer because where it was between two states. He'll serve all his time in one state, then transfer to another and serve his time there. Me and my baby have since relocated and thank God every day for the ones that helped. I'm still in contact with the people I knew at my old home. They're glad we're doing well.

[00:09:48] [SPEAKER_01] So then four months later, Opie comes in one more time and says, Life after I ran from my abusive ex. Long time no see. After the sentencing, me and my baby felt relieved. We decided to go out and live a little. We went down to Florida and visited all the beaches we could find. We made a beeline to Disney World. I would have spent every penny on this planet because we finally felt like we were living life. We made our way up to Nashville and showed her my love for country music.

[00:10:17] [SPEAKER_01] After leaving Nashville, we went back to my hometown. It was so much to process. We ended up starting therapy when we got there. It's a long road of healing and we decided to settle here for a little bit. So she gets to know her awesome grandpa, his dad. My parents are flying in and we're going to go to family therapy. I plan to go back to my home, but right now I want to heal in the place I got lost in and broke. I feel pulled here to heal, to gather myself and find a way to let my past here go.

[00:10:46] [SPEAKER_01] I feel like I won't be able to move on if I don't. I'm glad he didn't affect our child very much. I don't think my baby had the understanding of what was going on. If I post any more updates, I'm not going to give very many details about us to protect our identity. I'm going to go to school so I can work in social services and help women that was in my shoes. I'm going to wait until I'm in a healthier mindset and a better mental state.

[00:11:09] [SPEAKER_01] I just want to give this final life update because I'm so proud of myself and the life we are now living and pushing through for. I'm so glad that OP and daughter is in a much better place now, but it's incredibly terrifying and just sad at the same time that they had to go through this to begin with. You know, fleeing states while pregnant, secretly saving money and having to spend years looking over your shoulder, just wondering where he could be terrified of this.

[00:11:37] [SPEAKER_01] Trying to force contact through the courts. But I'm glad that, you know, the dad in this situation turned around and said I didn't raise a woman beater and refuse to bail him out. Fucking too true. But the ending did get me a little bit emotional because, you know, after years of surviving, basically, CPO talking about beaches, Disney World therapy, healing with family and, you know, wanting to help other women someday.

[00:12:04] [SPEAKER_01] It felt like someone that was finally getting their life back after all the shit that they've been through. So, you know, fair play to them, honestly. What do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Let's move on to another story. Our next story comes from KindNecessary8115 and says, Am I the arsehole here for not wanting to befriend my landlady's son?

[00:12:30] [SPEAKER_01] I, 21 Female, recently, about a month ago, started renting a room in a family home. It's in their basement. And I have my own entrance, kitchen and bathroom. I generally don't need to go upstairs for any reason. The family who lives in the house consists of a middle-aged couple and their 18-year-old son. The son has a room in the basement next to mine. But he goes upstairs to eat, so he doesn't use my kitchen.

[00:12:55] [SPEAKER_01] There isn't any common space in the basement apart from the kitchen and bathroom, so I don't really see him that much. I spend most of my time in my room when I'm at home, and so does he. However, a couple of days ago, the mother, my landlady, came downstairs to talk to me. And she seemed upset about the fact that I hadn't been trying to befriend her son after I moved in. She said he's nervous about leaving his room because I'm so unapproachable, and that I should try to be more friendly and get to know him.

[00:13:22] [SPEAKER_01] Now, I haven't exactly been trying to start conversations with him, but I don't think I've been hostile either. I've smiled at him politely and said hi whenever we saw each other in the hallway. And he's never made an effort to talk to me either, so I don't know what landlady was expecting. When I moved in, she did tell me her son lives in the basement too, and that maybe we could become friends. However, she didn't phrase it in a way that made me think she was expecting me to actively make an effort to befriend him.

[00:13:47] [SPEAKER_01] I just assumed she thought it would be a nice thing to happen, but not an expectation. I was never against the idea of being friends with him. And if it had happened organically, that would have been cool, but being asked by his mummy to befriend him isn't really making me want to make an effort. It also wouldn't feel like a real friendship if I'm only doing it because I'm being asked to. But I'm also thinking that maybe I should just try and talk to him since it's not his fault his mother is like that.

[00:14:14] [SPEAKER_01] And I obviously want to keep the peace, but I don't know. Am I the arsehole for not wanting to be friends with my landlady's son at this point? And I gotta be honest, this gave me creepy vibes. It's probably not, but all I could picture as I was reading that is like them stood at the top of the stairs to this basement. The mum and an OP just looking down and it's pitch black down there like you see in the horror movies, right? And the mum's going, go downstairs. My st...

[00:14:43] [SPEAKER_01] Go downstairs and talk to my son in the basement. He's waiting for you. Like, no offense to the son because he honestly might just be shy and normal and not knowing what the bloody hell's going. But the mum coming downstairs to pressure OP, the tenant, into socializing with her son is just... Absolutely not. A commenter says, he's 18. That could be a high school student or recently graduated. You're 21. That's three years out of high school as an adult.

[00:15:12] [SPEAKER_01] What in the world is this woman thinking? Continue as you are while looking for a space. Continue as you are while looking for a new space and move ASAP. Trouble ahead, avoid it. Yeah, absolutely trouble ahead. OP says, the son is in high school. I'm studying to become a nurse and work as a bartender during weekends. I've never been invited upstairs. The dad and son seem normal. The mum is basically the only one I've had an actual conversation with. When told to keep her door locked, OP says, there is a lock on my door.

[00:15:41] [SPEAKER_01] But honestly, I'm not really worried about the son. He hasn't been giving me bad vibes or anything. Just seems like a typical teenage boy gaming in his room. Dad also seems normal. Mum is the only crazy person as far as I'm concerned. When asked if OP made a decision yet, OP says, yeah, I'm going to look for a different place to live. Also, since my landlady has tried to impose new rules several times that weren't discussed when I moved in or mentioned in my lease. Such as me not being allowed to come home after 10pm.

[00:16:10] [SPEAKER_01] And absolutely, it isn't a problem when I get off at work at 7am because then they're already awake when I get home. But I don't know what I'm going to do when I get off at 1am or something. I think I'm going to just have to avoid those shifts until I find a different place to live. So OP does come in with their update and says, so I moved out. My problems with landlady only got worse. When I moved in, she told me I was allowed to have guests over as often as I liked.

[00:16:35] [SPEAKER_01] But then later, she changed it to twice a week after I had a friend over for several days in a row. With everything else going on, I couldn't help thinking she was trying to force me to spend less time with my friends so I'd be more likely to want to talk to her son. This also wasn't the first time she suddenly added new rules after I already signed the lease. She also asked me to not come home after 10pm because their dogs would bark when I walked in the driveway.

[00:17:00] [SPEAKER_01] I would not have moved in if this rule was mentioned before I signed the lease because I work as a bartender. So it's not really an option for me to never come home after 10pm. All your replies really validated my concerns and confirmed that I was not overreacting. So I started looking for different living arrangements. I talked to my friends about it and one of them immediately said he'd actually been considering renting out a room in his apartment to save some money. So I moved in with him two weeks later.

[00:17:27] [SPEAKER_01] Landlady seemed quite happy to get rid of me if I'm being completely honest. According to my lease, I was supposed to put in a four week notice but when I told her I'm moving out, she asked me how soon I could do it. Maybe she's going to try and find someone else to set up with her son because her plan didn't work with me. Anyways, not my problem anymore. Too true. And I'm glad OP said that at the end because that was absolutely my thoughts at the same time. Get rid of you. Get someone else in. It's going to be another unsuspecting girl of this situation.

[00:17:57] [SPEAKER_01] But I do wonder how much the son actually knows about this. Bloody hell. He may be in on it. He may not be. But imagine this guy actually does get a girl from one day. What that mom is going to be like. Holy shit. Scare him away. Quick as you like, right? But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And let's move on to another story. Now our next story comes from Educated Vegetable from the Anti-Works subreddit.

[00:18:26] [SPEAKER_01] And said, notified my work weeks ago I'm leaving for a family vacation in July. Tickets were bought, non-transferable, and they are panicking, begging me to cancel. This whole situation is absurd and I need a sanity check. I work in admin in a niche but important multinational industry. I am a knowledgeable, reliable cog and I pick up a lot of slack as we're incredibly short-staffed with plans to add more because it's working out fine for right now. Blah blah.

[00:18:55] [SPEAKER_01] My boss is going on vacation and she and I were comparing dates and I realized they line up. She immediately told me I had to cancel. I told her I can't. Things are non-refundable. Since I'm a cog, I never considered my manager's schedule. That is not my job. She told me she could deny my PTO and if I go, I would be released. Great. I go to her boss and say, let's make a plan. They say, okay, great.

[00:19:21] [SPEAKER_01] And I build a schedule for task coverage, including him taking a few hours each day to sit at my desk and doing my in-person job of fielding industry questions or taking their info and I'd follow up later. And I offer to log in, paid for a couple of hours every day to help support. She says, cool, I present this to the higher-ups. My boss's boss told me that the higher-ups think that he's too important and high-paid to sit at a front admin office for any amount of time. Then the board comes up with a great idea.

[00:19:51] [SPEAKER_01] We'll just offer to reschedule my vacation. They offered a few hundred bucks to cover scheduling fees. I calculated the fees. They are way more than a few hundred dollars. Talking thousands as hotels, travel, transport, everything for four, I book in advance so I can just relax. We do this because it's not just my life, but my partner's summer schedule and his two kids. And their crazy schedules with sports, split custody, their bio-mums vacation plans, a whole thing.

[00:20:20] [SPEAKER_01] They asked me to cancel it and go some other time. I said, affirm, no. The kids are finally old enough to comfortably travel internationally. We're excited. And I'm not telling them we can't go because work won't let me. Huh? My thing is, I'm a cog. Should I have double-checked everyone's calendar before scheduling? Sure. But I'm not a managing party. I haven't experienced something like this in my entire working life. I've previously notified upper management of my vacation time at the beginning of the year, just like this.

[00:20:50] [SPEAKER_01] And they say, okay, great. Thanks for letting us know. Why is my leaving for seven working days leaving the office in such a panic? There are options to resolve this, like having someone come from another department for a couple of days here, another couple of days there, and I offer to support remotely. Also, my vacation scheduled for July. I tell you in February. Also, shouldn't this be a reasonable indicator of how short-staffed a department is for two people?

[00:21:16] [SPEAKER_01] Being out for any extended period of time throws a wrench into everything. Did I do something wrong? Is there something I'm not seeing? Any insight or advice would be amazing. ETA, I'm a woman. I hate it when companies do this because they're creating the crisis that they're panicking about. You know, one person becomes the entire safety net for like one niche role. I worked somewhere kind of like this where they'd give someone maybe an hour of rush training

[00:21:45] [SPEAKER_01] before I went away for holiday. And then the second I left, everything would sort of just collapse and my phone would start exploding nonstop. And this is not because, you know, I was some irreplaceable genius. Absolutely not. But because management never like gave anyone proper time or anything like that to be able to cover the role. It was really weird role, to be fair. But for me, I always felt bad for the poor co-workers who were shoved into the role too because they didn't want it either and were basically set up to fail.

[00:22:15] [SPEAKER_01] Which I know isn't my bad on my part, but I would answer the phone for them because, you know, I felt sorry for them. I know ultimately I should have just let it, you know, fall apart because it's enabling it, right? I just felt so sorry for the people that were covering those positions. But I don't blame OP at all here, you know. Notice was given months in advance, offered remote support, offered a coverage plan, offered solutions. Meanwhile, management is just being dickheads about it. A commenter says to OP, July is ample time for them to figure out a temporary situation.

[00:22:45] [SPEAKER_01] If they truly can't because you're just that unique, then they can't exactly fire you. A commenter says, sounds like a good reason for a very healthy raise, in fact. Another commenter says, maybe your boss is too important and high paid to have a vacation. Commenter says, I love how the boss rescheduling their vacation was never an option. Another one says, just imagine if you were in an accident and were incapacitated. They'd have to figure it out. Never think you're so indispensable you can't be replaced. You can and will be without thought.

[00:23:15] [SPEAKER_01] OP says that's a good point. Commenter says, take your vacation. Say out loud to them, if you can't do without me for seven days, what will you do without me if you fire me? OP says, I did. He told me I was a valuable employee, but ultimately replaceable and should start looking for other work. OP comes in a month later and says, interesting update in this saga. Original post linked, hopefully. And I need another sanity check. Summary, I notified my workplace in March that I'd be going on vacation in July.

[00:23:43] [SPEAKER_01] Dates overlap with my bosses who panicked and told me she would deny my leave and it would be job abandonment. Cool. So, some time has passed and upper management is absolutely begging me to reconsider, reschedule, cancel, anything so that I'm here for the time our dates overlap. Overlapping time? Five work days. They keep telling me they have to consider the needs of the business. That they will pay for rescheduling fees? In the thousands. They keep asking me to pull up or answer for my personal calendar.

[00:24:12] [SPEAKER_01] They can join me into rescheduling to come back early to cover some of the time. They keep saying, but you know how busy it gets. Look at your metrics. On top of this, we had two people leave the department in as many months and we are being told no additional personnel will be hired. The reason why no one is being hired is because I've absorbed most of the workload and see, it's fine. We don't need more people. Great. The thing is, I know how busy it gets.

[00:24:40] [SPEAKER_01] That's why I booked a family vacation during the slowest time of the year and told you all in March that I wouldn't be here. I wasn't asking. I feel like I'm going crazy with six people telling me I'm being unreasonable, inflexible and putting them in a bad position. I even made a temporary schedule for other departments to cover my work for that time. Again, five days. And was told it's not going to be considered because other departments are really short-staffed.

[00:25:06] [SPEAKER_01] It just really is making me feel like all personnel issues are falling onto me. The thing is, I'm looking at the job market right now and it's bleak out there. Recession indicators waving red flags. Sure, I could get a new job, but not at my pay scale or in my field right away. I'm seriously considering making my part of the family trip shorter so I can come back early. Do I hold strong or do I let them bully me into changing my vacation plans so I have job security?

[00:25:34] [SPEAKER_01] Seriously asking because I feel like I'm actually going crazy from stress. Commenter says, If they can't live without you for the duration of your vacation, what sense is letting you go? Commenter says, Piggybacking top comment to add, If you fold on this, they'll expect you to fold on absolutely everything moving forward. So strap in to completely lose all agency for the rest of your time there. You never deal with bullies by caving. You deal with bullies by standing up for yourself. That's the only way to earn respect. Lastly,

[00:26:04] [SPEAKER_01] unless you've got some sort of ironclad explicit agreement to compensate you for thousands of dollars in rescheduling fees, they're not going to pay you jack. A commenter says, A job tried pulling this on me with their blackout week. It was towards the end when everything was slowing down. I was their best front-end guy. Customers loved me. One of the employees did a little too much as well. That's why I was taking the break. The manager made all these threats and said I wasn't allowed to call off. I told them I wasn't asking, I'm just letting you know.

[00:26:33] [SPEAKER_01] Came back and nothing happened. Coworkers were kind of pissed and jealous. I left two weeks later and got a better job. The commenter says, You gave them four months notice and they can't or won't come up with a backup plan. Enjoy your vacation. Another one says, You gave plenty of notice. If they legit cannot cover for five days, there are serious structural issues with this company. Also, they can absolutely cover for five days. It is unlikely that they will fire you right away for this. However, you should look now for the next employer.

[00:27:02] [SPEAKER_01] You have to ask yourself if you want to work for a company that treats you like that. Hopi says, Yeah, that's where I'm ultimately leaning. At this point, I have such a bad feeling about this whole thing and questioning if my own sanity is worth the cost of staying employed here. And it just isn't. The commenter says, Yeah, if I had to guess, Hopi does the work of multiple people and they're too greedy to hire more people so they can be okay with Hopi gone. If your company can't run without you, you should be rich as fuck. A software company I worked at

[00:27:31] [SPEAKER_01] wouldn't bother me while I was on vacation unless it was about certain systems that I built myself and they had exhausted all of their resources. In all the years I worked there, they emailed me two times and both times I paused my vacation for 30 minutes to fix something for them. And they'd always give me a fat bonus for not leaving them high and dry. So Hopi comes in one month later and says, Final update. Hopefully I linked the post correctly. Thanks to all who commented or interacted with me on the previous posts. All comments were read, considered,

[00:28:01] [SPEAKER_01] and offered many perspectives I didn't consider. So thank you. In short, I notified my employer months in advance that I was leaving for vacation. They needed coverage for five days and they told me that if I went, I would not have a job when I returned. Cool. After some reflection and your encouraging comments, I decided to look for another job in the industry I work in. It's pretty niche, so the major players know of or have met each other. I have reached out to a vendor of the company I currently work for

[00:28:29] [SPEAKER_01] and they immediately offered me a position. Fully remote and at the same pay scale. They said I can start now, later, whenever. They are stoked to have me on the team. They mentioned I have a great reputation and all of our vendors' interactions have been positive and because they were a vendor, they couldn't approach me. But they were happy I reached out to them. I'm over the moon. I gave my current position a month's notice. I'm training my replacement over the next two weeks, taking a short break and then starting my new remote position.

[00:28:58] [SPEAKER_01] And I get to keep my vacation with no hassle. All in all, I'm really happy how this all worked out and not sure if I'd have pursued anything new without my current position treating me so poorly. So honestly, kind of have to thank them for opening my eyes. Feel the force, Harry asks. How did they react to you leaving? If they can't cover you for five days, I would expect them to panic even more over replacing you. Opie says they were mostly resigned. Made a counteroffer but I respectfully declined. They asked if I could stay

[00:29:27] [SPEAKER_01] an additional week and I also declined that saying I wanted to reestablish my routine with a new company and that I wanted to focus on my growth there. I thank them for everything I've learned while with them and the opportunity to move on wouldn't have been a possibility without them. Which is true. These last couple of weeks have been a mad scramble for them to get a replacement. And frankly, they're in for a fun awakening when they realize they had taken on the job of about three people. But this workload will be up to management to decide how to allocate. Not my problem anymore.

[00:29:57] [SPEAKER_01] Commodore says, yay! I love it when everyone gets what they deserve. Congrats on the new job. Another one says, the new recruit she is training probably doesn't deserve this. But hey, maybe after this company will treat its employees better. Doubtful though. Commodore says, bad management never learns. They deserve to get fired but rarely do. Best talent leaves because of bad management. Always. It's either unfair wage to a top performing slash most knowledgeable person. General disorganization causing the team

[00:30:27] [SPEAKER_01] to be excessively stressed out and so on. A bad manager can make the easiest job hell. Another one says, please make sure to thank your current role for prompting you to see what was out there and congrats. And one more says, I know a lot of people are saying you're being too kind here but this is exactly the sort of situation where I don't think a fuck you on the way out the door serves you. It's not about your employer deserving better although the kindness to your replacement is the sort of thing would pay benefits in a just universe but it's really easy

[00:30:56] [SPEAKER_01] to say burn it down to someone else. Yeah, and there was a lot of comments, you know, saying just leave them high and dry and all this kind of stuff but I feel like the last comment is the right approach. OP was respectful on their way out and that was probably the best way especially if you're in a niche job and you know all the different companies know each other and all this kind of thing. Word does get around so it's probably best to be on the cautious side with that kind of thing and besides, OP won in the end.

[00:31:26] [SPEAKER_01] New job, remote working, all that good stuff. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. That's just a huge thank you for being here today getting involved in the stories, your love, your support, your time. It always means the absolute world to me so thank you so so much and hopefully I'm going to see you in the next one. Take care and much love.

[00:31:51] [SPEAKER_00] Yeah, man I remember being so naive when life was good weather and palm trees back in the day you were everything I need but then along came a time when you crushed my dreams oh yeah you played me like a fool when you made me believe that the line between love was ridiculous or real oh yeah you see we end up spare crime everywhere you're selling false hope cause you just don't care