AIO For NOT Giving Mom Money From My Grandfather's Will - She's Pressuring Me For It | Reddit

[00:00:02] [SPEAKER_00] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark B and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories. And if you do love a Reddit story, why not consider hitting that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Today we're going to be covering some stories from the r slash r/AmIOverreacting subreddit. And our first one comes from directcomplaint2697. And it says, am I overreacting?

[00:00:32] [SPEAKER_00] Mom got cut out of grandfather's will and pressuring me for her share. I said no. So, I will add context by saying my mom is not struggling for money. Quite the opposite to be honest. I'm the one who doesn't have much. My grandfather recently passed away. We're expecting it. He was in his mid-90s and was in hospital for several weeks. But the issue is that he was in an argument with my mom not long before he got his final illness.

[00:01:00] [SPEAKER_00] I don't know what this argument was about, but I heard through my cousin who seems to know everything that he was so angry with my mom. He got his lawyers to come to the house so he could adjust the will and have my mom cut out of it. So, once we find out what the will says, we basically learn that me and my siblings are getting my mom's share, divided between us. My two brothers have special needs, so mom isn't asking them for money. But she is pressuring me for the money.

[00:01:28] [SPEAKER_00] The thing is, this was my grandfather's final wish for her not to have it. Even though he probably did it in a fit of anger and wasn't truly himself in his final days. Also, as I mentioned, she doesn't need the money. And she knows I will benefit from having it. I am saying no to her. And she is saying she will cut me off and never speak to me again. Am I overreacting by sticking to my response and not caring if she cuts me off because I need the money?

[00:01:56] [SPEAKER_00] Now, for me in this, this is not overreacting at all. Your grandfather made a choice. Whether he was angry or not, he went to the effort of getting lawyers to his house to make this change. That's like, that's not a spur of the moment decision. He actually, you know, it's a thought process. And I believe your mom is showing her true colors here. You know, she doesn't need the money, knows you do, and is still threatening to cut you off if you don't hand over what your grandfather specifically left to you.

[00:02:22] [SPEAKER_00] It's manipulative behavior, full stop. She's saying give me your inheritance or lose your mother, which is a hell of a thing to do to your own child, right? And if she's willing to cut you off over money she doesn't need, it tells you exactly what kind of relationship this is. It's a conditional one. And in this, you're simply respecting your grandfather's wishes and protecting yourself at the same time.

[00:02:47] [SPEAKER_00] I say simply stand your ground and whatever choices she makes, they're her choices. And you need to remember that. And I kind of always wonder on the back of these kind of stories, you know, if she does cut you off, will your life be peaceful in other ways as well? I got a feeling it will. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Let's have another one.

[00:03:14] [SPEAKER_00] So our next story comes from, again, this is all going to be amioverreacting subreddit from weekindependent2835 who says, Am I overreacting? My friend broke my expensive turntable and won't pay for it. So this happened last weekend and I'm still mad about it. Had my friend Sarah over for dinner and she was being her usual clumsy self. Knocked over my vintage turntable that I've been collecting records for.

[00:03:43] [SPEAKER_00] Thing completely shattered. The tonearm snapped clean off and the platter cracked down the middle. This wasn't some cheap Amazon special either. I paid $800 for it two years ago and it was in perfect condition. When it happened, she just stood there like, oh my god, I'm so sorry. But didn't offer to pay or anything. I was trying to stay calm so I just said we'd figure it out later. Next day I texted her the receipt and asked if she could cover it since her insurance might help.

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_00] She completely flipped on me saying it was an accident and I shouldn't have had something so expensive where people could bump into it. Like what? Am I supposed to childproof my entire apartment for grown adults? She kept saying she doesn't have that kind of money right now, which I get. But she literally posted pics from some expensive brunch place the same day. Then she had the nerve to suggest I should have told her beforehand that stuff in my house was fragile.

[00:04:39] [SPEAKER_00] I've known this girl for six years and she's acting like I set some kind of trap for her. The worst part is she's making me feel like the bad guy for even bringing it up. I ended up telling her that if she can't take responsibility for breaking other people's stuff, then maybe she shouldn't come over anymore. She called me materialistic and said our friendship means more than some stupid record player. Now half our friend group is saying I'm being harsh and that accidents happen.

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_00] But like, if you break something expensive, you pay for it, right? That's just basic adulting. I'm not asking her to pay for it all at once. Even $50 a month would show she cares. My roommate thinks I handled it wrong and should have been more understanding about her financial situation. But honestly, I'm tired of people thinking being broke gives you a free pass to be irresponsible. She could have at least offered something instead of getting defensive and trying to make it my fault.

[00:05:34] [SPEAKER_00] The turntable is completely ruined and I can't afford to replace it anytime soon. Am I overreacting here or is she being a terrible friend? Part of me wonders if I should just have eaten the cost to keep the piece. But that doesn't seem fair either. I work extra shifts to buy that thing and now it's sitting in pieces in my closet. She won't even acknowledge that she should help pay for it and keeps changing the subject whenever I bring it up.

[00:06:00] [SPEAKER_00] Really questioning this whole friendship at this point because her reaction tells me everything about what kind of person she is. A commenter says to Opie on this one, I'd be more annoyed about the fact that she doesn't seem to care and turning it onto you by calling you materialistic. Real mates don't do that. Hillsbury Hoboy says, As a record collector, I'd be very frustrated and I'd like them to pay me back too.

[00:06:25] [SPEAKER_00] Have a cheaper modern turntable and I'd be devastated if that broke, let alone a vintage player worth $800. Which would be my prized possession to be honest. But hobby aside, I think a good friend would be very willing to help replace it even if it's little bits at a time. Reminds me of when I was a broke 18 year old and lost 10 grams of my friend's weed and paid her back like 40 bucks at a time. I had no problem doing that over something silly, let alone an expensive vintage turntable.

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_00] And just a comment from the other side as well saying you're overreacting. Why the heck were you keeping your very expensive vintage turntable that your guest was able to easily knock it over? Most people have their players on a sturdy tabletop and tucked into a corner of the room. Why was it placed in such a precarious position that it would even be capable of being knocked over? Seems like this one is on you for not properly protecting your very expensive, hard to replace things. Why would her insurance cover your stuff?

[00:07:21] [SPEAKER_00] Your homeowner's insurance should cover your belongings in your home when accidents such as this occurs. Love the moment where you dogged on your friend for always being so clumsy. As if this accident occurred due to some moral failure in her character. And there was a few comments like that as well just saying you know why did you leave it in that particular place? It's like oh dear. For me you know OP's not overreacting in this situation. And you know if I was that friend and I knocked over something like that. Or anything in a friend's home like that.

[00:07:50] [SPEAKER_00] I would be insistent even if I couldn't afford it in that particular moment. Coming up with some sort of plan so that I can sort them out. Not trying to deflect saying oh you shouldn't have had something so expensive where people could bump into it. I mean like come on now. In reality this friendship is probably cooked now anyway so you may as well keep asking for it. But what do you guys make of this situation? What would you do if it was OP? Maybe you agree with the other comments. Maybe you got a different opinion on the matter. Let us know your thoughts and let's move on to another one.

[00:08:22] [SPEAKER_00] Now this next story is from a deleted user who says am I overreacting for wanting to break up with my girlfriend over a joke she made? Hello using my friend's account to make this post because I don't have my own reddit and don't plan on using it for anything else besides this. I was crying pretty hard while I was writing this and forgot to mention I'm also a woman. I could see why this would read like I'm a guy. With that out of the way my girlfriend and I are both 19 to 20.

[00:08:50] [SPEAKER_00] Around two months ago I got in my first car accident. My younger sister was also in the car with me. A car hit mine on the side pretty bad but the driver just sped off. I pulled over somewhere and after that I remember being in total shock and froze. I thought I was well prepared on what to do but it was like I forgot everything about how to handle a car accident. On top of that I'm ashamed to admit it but I also lost my composure and freaked out and cried for a bit.

[00:09:18] [SPEAKER_00] So many things just hit me all at once and I didn't know how to handle it. I wasn't sure if my car was safe to drive longer distances. Only the side door and front panel had to be replaced and the suspension realigned. The engine was fine but I didn't know that at the time. I was worried about how much the repairs were going to cost. I also felt worried about my sister. Not only was she there for the accident but I had to take her to an extracurricular.

[00:09:45] [SPEAKER_00] I thought about contacting our mum but I didn't think it'd be best to bother her with a situation. She works in healthcare and my thought process was that. Even if I could get a hold of her I shouldn't make her take time off work to deal with this. I also needed to return to my campus on time for an important test that I couldn't make up. Professor's words not mine and later go to work. My girlfriend and I have been together for years and has been my rock so I decided to call her.

[00:10:13] [SPEAKER_00] Maybe that wasn't the best choice for a situation like that but I needed help and felt like I didn't have other options. But she talked me through it and I was able to snap out of the haze I was in. Dropped my sister off and made it to my college and job on time without the car blowing up. I was really grateful for my girlfriend's support. Up until this point my girlfriend has not brought up the accident unless it was to be supportive. That's why it was so shocking when she cracked a joke about how I was blubbering on the phone to her after my car got hit.

[00:10:42] [SPEAKER_00] Like we're in the middle of a convo. I don't remember about what but it wasn't about the accident. And she did an impression of what I sounded like on the phone. I just stared at her like I must have misheard her. But she doubled down. She also said it was ridiculous that I was sad about my precious car being damaged. For the record the car is almost 15 years old so I really couldn't care about the way it looks. I told my girlfriend it was messed up that she was making fun of my reaction to the accident.

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_00] I also felt hurt that she remembers the accident as me crying because I was sad about my car. And not because my family was relying on me. And I was scared I wouldn't be able to fulfill all my obligations that day. And yes when I called her that day I did tell her about everything I needed to do. She said it wasn't messed up because it wasn't like I or my sister had injuries from the accident. Or that my car got totaled. If either of those things did happen she swore that she wouldn't have made jokes about it.

[00:11:37] [SPEAKER_00] I honestly don't even know if I can believe her on that. I never would have guessed she'd even joke about a moment where I was emotionally vulnerable with her. Those kind of jokes are not normal in our relationship either. I would never make fun of her for something she went through or her reaction to it. I don't know if I can trust her to not make jokes about a situation where I did get hurt or in any kind of difficult situation. What kind of excuse could she give the next time? Like what if I broke my leg?

[00:12:05] [SPEAKER_00] Would she make a joke about me being upset that I couldn't walk and say it's okay because it's not like both your legs are broken. This also made me feel like I can't be emotional to her again out of fear that she'd make fun of me for it later. I can understand that it's silly to cry or freak out about small things but I don't think being in a hit and run is a small thing. And I did what I was supposed to do afterwards. I didn't just sit there, cry and do nothing. She didn't apologize and told me she didn't do anything wrong. I spoke to her again about it.

[00:12:35] [SPEAKER_00] This time she added that she made that joke because she thought it was funny that my younger sister didn't react the way I did. She also said that my mom took the cost of the car repairs like a champ while I was fretting about our financial situation. Because I had the worst reaction in my family, she said the joke was supposed to highlight how I wasn't as strong as either of them. I should have handled it more like they did. I told her I needed time away to think and she's respected that. But it's been hard because I've wondered if she had a point.

[00:13:04] [SPEAKER_00] I did react more badly than my mom and sister did and I'm embarrassed for it. On some level I agreed that I wish I was emotionally stronger. But a part of me still says it was really messed up for her to make that joke to begin with. That is absolutely shitty behavior from your girlfriend and no, you're absolutely not overreacting to the situation. You were in a hit and run accident. Traumatic in itself. It also sounds like you had a lot going on around you. You were worried about your sister's safety.

[00:13:34] [SPEAKER_00] Of course you are. You're responsible for her while she's in your car. That's scary, right? You had financial concerns, academic pressure as well, work obligations. And you were trying to deal with all of that as well. The very fact that you pulled it all together and got your sister where she needed to be, made your test and got to work. That's no weakness right there. And your girlfriend's joke, air quotes joke in this, wasn't just insensitive. It was just damn right cruel. And her doubling down on this makes it even worse.

[00:14:03] [SPEAKER_00] She's not turning around to you and saying, look, I'm really sorry I hurt you. I shouldn't have said that. I shouldn't have, you know, I shouldn't have taken the, I shouldn't have taken the piss. She's not doing that. She's doubling down. And she's quite happy to mock you for it. And that ending where she was comparing you to your mom and sister, it's just, it pisses me off to be quite honest. Everyone processes trauma differently. And you were the one actually driving when it happened.

[00:14:29] [SPEAKER_00] I think you really need to ask yourself, you know, she's created the situation now where you can't be vulnerable with her because you're going to be worried about what she's going to say or do or mock you for it. And you've learned that, you know, if something happens and you need to turn to her, is she going to mock you? Is she going to weaponize it against you? That's not someone you can feel safe with. That's not a relationship in my opinion. And you're certainly not weak for crying during a hit and run.

[00:14:56] [SPEAKER_00] You're human and you deserve someone who treats you with care when you're showing that vulnerability towards them. Absolute wild ass behavior. I'm just going to cover the top comment on this one from BloodRain12569 who says, Dude, not overreacting. Having the thought that you don't want to bother or call your parent for something as serious as a car crash that could have left you in the hospital is disturbing. This tells me you don't have someone safe to reach out to or someone that you feel you could talk to without being a burden.

[00:15:27] [SPEAKER_00] Naturally, the only person who seemed safe was your girlfriend who later made fun of you for being unable to emotionally regulate yourself. Dude, you should be able to talk to your parents, man. Please go to therapy and reassess every single one of your relationships. You know, that was interesting that OP was hesitant to get in touch with their mom, just didn't want to, wasn't it? Because you would hope that any parent would want their children to be their first call in an emergency like that. Obviously, after emergency services, etc.

[00:15:57] [SPEAKER_00] But what do you guys make of that one? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Let's move on to another story. Now, our next story comes from Strawberry Lizard who says, Am I overreacting to my family calling my hobby weird and creepy? Sometimes when I want some alone time, I visit the local cemetery, clean the graves and leave flowers or small cards for those who never receive any.

[00:16:23] [SPEAKER_00] Not like the idiots on TikTok who are cleaning graves with bleach and pretending to vacuum them. I use water, Dawn dish soap and D2 biological solution, along with soft bristled brushes and microfiber cloths. I started just going for walks in the cemetery because it's beautiful there and peaceful. And lately, I found myself preferring the company of the dead over the company of some of the people in my life. Largely due to behavior like what I'm about to share.

[00:16:50] [SPEAKER_00] Several members of my family have always made fun of me. My appearance, anything I like to do, my job. Nothing is really off limits to them. And every time I get frustrated with it, they laugh it off and say, I'm being too sensitive. Well, I stopped by a family member's house on the way home from the cemetery to drop off some stuff for Thanksgiving yesterday. And I was asked why I was so dirty. I did have leaves in my hair and grass and dirt stains on my jeans and hands.

[00:17:18] [SPEAKER_00] But it wasn't like I hadn't showered in weeks or anything, or anything crazy. I made the mistake of explaining that I liked to visit the cemetery and clean up neglected graves. I was immediately mocked for it. And the second I left, this family member sent a message to a family group chat I'm not a part of and did not know existed until my brother asked today if I saw the group chat messages. And I asked, what group chat?

[00:17:42] [SPEAKER_00] The messages consisted of several members of my family making fun of me, sharing gifs of skeletons and ghosts, calling me weird, saying I'm a freak and it shouldn't surprise them. And that maybe I should just be uninvited to Thanksgiving so I could go spend it with the dead people in the cemetery. I sent the family member who started at all a message telling her that I would, in fact, rather spend Thanksgiving with the dead. And that she could feel free to take the vegan items she planned to make for my husband and I off the menu because we're no longer coming.

[00:18:11] [SPEAKER_00] And I told her she should be relieved to not have a creepy weirdo such as me at her home. Some of my families are mad at me and said that I made her cry and should apologize and still attend Thanksgiving. My husband is in agreement with me and even offered to come to the cemetery with me on Thanksgiving and help me clean up and deliver flowers, which sounds way nicer to me. Was my response an overreaction? One commenter says, not overreacting, but I think your hobby is weird. I think it's weird that you prefer the company of dead to living people.

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_00] You realize that they're not company, right? Leaving cards for them is also odd, especially if you didn't know them in life. I think it's weird that you would turn up at someone's house with leaves in your head too. But I think they were too mean to you about it. You're doing a decent service, cleaning up messy areas like picking up trash or cleaning off graffiti. So they were too mean to you even though what you do is unusual. Opie responds saying, I may not have known most of them, but somebody did.

[00:19:08] [SPEAKER_00] Maybe all of those somebodies have moved away or died or just simply don't care to check on a loved one's grave or aren't able to clean the gravesite if they do visit. But they were still a person and I think they deserve to be remembered in some way. Maybe one of those people will find my cards and it'll make them happy that somebody still remembers that grave was a person once. Maybe nobody will ever know or care that I put them there. Either way, we're all going to end up a headstone one day.

[00:19:34] [SPEAKER_00] And when I do, I hope somebody cares enough to clean the moss off and leave me a flower or card. Adventures of Violet says you're an adult. You don't have to do dinner with anyone you don't want to and don't have to offer apologies to anyone you don't want to. Carpet Scary says, I go to cemeteries for relaxation. I even hauled my best friend up a hillside when our cruise ship stopped in Sitka, Alaska. So we could go and see and read the headstones.

[00:20:02] [SPEAKER_00] Often I take requests for headstones from find a grave. Honey, look, there are plenty of us weirdly wonderful people who are just like you. Shame on your family. I'm sorry that they feel so comfortable about whatever it is that is making them that way. You're not overreacting. And just so you know, if you and my niece, both you and your hubby would be welcomed at my parents' house for Thanksgiving. While my mum would give you maps of the local cemeteries with interesting characters to go visit.

[00:20:29] [SPEAKER_00] So don't engage with crazy people who don't love all of who you are. And it's kind of you to take care of those headstones. So many of them have no family living. Your auntie in spirit sends you a hug and be glad you're not alone. I promise you. And I think it is a very unique hobby as such. But I also think, and again, I'm going to have to put this in there, that as long as it's being done properly, etc. I don't know the full ins and outs of cleaning graves, all that kind of thing.

[00:20:58] [SPEAKER_00] So as long as it's being done correctly, etc. I think it's just such a genuinely kind and community-minded thing to do. From the comments that I've seen, it seems Opie has a lovely kind heart. You know, they're not doing it for socials. They're not doing it for views or anything like that. They're doing it because they care about the people who was once there, if I worded that correctly. And I'm totally with the comments on this one. You know, you don't have to apologize to everyone. You don't have to change your ways to suit anyone else.

[00:21:26] [SPEAKER_00] You're doing something that you love, that brings you peace, that cares about others. But Opie did add a little update within the same post and says, thanks everyone for the responses. My brother messaged a group chat yesterday and essentially told off the entire family that was part of that chat. Let them know that he isn't attending Thanksgiving either. Their response was basically, well, you weren't invited anymore anyways. He's been invited to go to the cemetery with my husband and I on Thanksgiving.

[00:21:52] [SPEAKER_00] As have any other family members who would like to not spend Thanksgiving with that part of the family. I'm going no slash low contact with them after I get back my tablecloths and decorative turkeys that I loaned to the bully in question. But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys. What do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And how about you? Do you have any unique hobbies that you'd like to share with us down in the comments? Please feel free to do so. Would love to hear about them.

[00:22:21] [SPEAKER_00] And just a huge thank you for being here today. Getting involved in the stories, listening, taking part, caring for one another as well. All super amazing, especially in today's times. Thank you so much and I will see you in the next one. Take care and much love.