My Sister Is The Golden Child And I'm Going To Skip her Wedding r/Relationships

[00:00:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Do you know that? You are in the morning in the evening, quickly pull your favorite shirt, grab a coffee and a bag.

[00:00:09] [SPEAKER_00]: No panic, parsley discs save the day. With their powerful formula, they eliminate the most hard-knocked stains themselves for deep, clean washing.

[00:00:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Just throw the disc into the trash and the rest, that makes your washing machine because you always give your best. Try now the best discs from parsley.

[00:00:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Keep your children's reach high.

[00:01:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Throwaway account plus fake names.

[00:01:06] [SPEAKER_01]: I 23 male and one of seven kids.

[00:01:09] [SPEAKER_01]: There's Lydia, 31 female.

[00:01:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Josh, 28 male.

[00:01:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Leo, 25 male.

[00:01:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Me, then Erin, 21 female.

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia, 18 female.

[00:01:20] [SPEAKER_01]: And the surprise child, Lexi, 4 female.

[00:01:24] [SPEAKER_01]: With that many siblings, it's easy to get lost in the crowd.

[00:01:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Some of us have our positions, so to speak.

[00:01:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Lydia is the oldest.

[00:01:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Lexi's the baby.

[00:01:32] [SPEAKER_01]: I have a kid.

[00:01:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, that's my descriptor.

[00:01:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Lupi gave us a grandchild.

[00:01:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin is the golden child.

[00:01:40] [SPEAKER_01]: She was the last planned child,

[00:01:42] [SPEAKER_01]: but the one to tie up our family.

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_01]: She was born premature,

[00:01:45] [SPEAKER_01]: so I understand that my parents coddled her to an extent,

[00:01:48] [SPEAKER_01]: but it's more than that now.

[00:01:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin's getting married and recently told us

[00:01:53] [SPEAKER_01]: that she's brought the date forward

[00:01:54] [SPEAKER_01]: due to a cancellation.

[00:01:56] [SPEAKER_01]: No big deal, it just means they're getting married sooner.

[00:02:00] [SPEAKER_01]: But the new date lands on the date

[00:02:01] [SPEAKER_01]: of Nadia's high school graduation.

[00:02:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin was sympathetic,

[00:02:05] [SPEAKER_01]: but she said she's already committed to the date.

[00:02:08] [SPEAKER_01]: They've printed the invitations.

[00:02:10] [SPEAKER_01]: My parents normally go overboard on our high school grads,

[00:02:12] [SPEAKER_01]: but they said they just had to miss Nadia's.

[00:02:15] [SPEAKER_01]: We were all sympathetic,

[00:02:17] [SPEAKER_01]: but it wasn't intentional, or so I thought.

[00:02:20] [SPEAKER_01]: But Nadia later told me and Leo

[00:02:22] [SPEAKER_01]: that she was there when Erin got the call

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_01]: about the cancellation

[00:02:25] [SPEAKER_01]: and told Erin that she was graduating that day.

[00:02:28] [SPEAKER_01]: But Erin just laughed and accepted the date anyway.

[00:02:31] [SPEAKER_01]: This, as much as I hate to admit it,

[00:02:33] [SPEAKER_01]: sounds like a very Erin thing to do.

[00:02:36] [SPEAKER_01]: She's booked her engagement part for

[00:02:37] [SPEAKER_01]: the night of Nadia's 18th birthday.

[00:02:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Luckily she wasn't celebrating until the weekend.

[00:02:43] [SPEAKER_01]: She's announced her engagement

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_01]: at my oldest sister's wedding anniversary.

[00:02:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Everything is about her.

[00:02:50] [SPEAKER_01]: I confronted Erin about this

[00:02:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and she said that Nadia's high school graduation

[00:02:54] [SPEAKER_01]: didn't matter.

[00:02:56] [SPEAKER_01]: She wanted to get married to the love of her life sooner

[00:02:59] [SPEAKER_01]: and our family has been to plenty

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_01]: of high school graduations at this point anyway.

[00:03:03] [SPEAKER_01]: She said something like, we still have Lexi,

[00:03:06] [SPEAKER_01]: but here's what gets me the most.

[00:03:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia's been looking forward to this for too long.

[00:03:11] [SPEAKER_01]: She's watched all of us graduate

[00:03:12] [SPEAKER_01]: and have these huge celebrations thrown by her parents.

[00:03:15] [SPEAKER_01]: I asked Nadia what she wanted

[00:03:17] [SPEAKER_01]: and she said she wanted to have her day.

[00:03:21] [SPEAKER_01]: So I told my family that me and Nadia

[00:03:24] [SPEAKER_01]: won't be attending the wedding.

[00:03:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Leo has also dropped out and everyone's angry.

[00:03:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin's furious and I didn't make it better

[00:03:31] [SPEAKER_01]: by telling her that I could watch

[00:03:33] [SPEAKER_01]: our other siblings get married

[00:03:34] [SPEAKER_01]: since there's all the same in her eyes.

[00:03:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Mum's trying to convince me to come to the wedding

[00:03:39] [SPEAKER_01]: because graduation isn't as important.

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_01]: But I feel like if I don't do this

[00:03:44] [SPEAKER_01]: then it sets a precedent in Nadia's life

[00:03:46] [SPEAKER_01]: that she was always going to mean less than Erin.

[00:03:49] [SPEAKER_01]: I've had messages calling me an asshole,

[00:03:51] [SPEAKER_01]: an idiot, et cetera.

[00:03:53] [SPEAKER_01]: They're telling me to step up and be a good brother.

[00:03:56] [SPEAKER_01]: But that's what I'm doing.

[00:03:57] [SPEAKER_01]: My son is supposed to be a ring bearer,

[00:03:59] [SPEAKER_01]: but with how my family is reacting

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm considering pulling him out of the wedding too.

[00:04:04] [SPEAKER_01]: My dad's told Nadia he'll take her to dinner

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_01]: after the wedding.

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia's currently staying with me

[00:04:10] [SPEAKER_01]: because Mum won't stop cornering her.

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_01]: And I, the asshole.

[00:04:15] [SPEAKER_01]: And you are being a good brother in this

[00:04:18] [SPEAKER_01]: and I think you should continue to stand your ground

[00:04:20] [SPEAKER_01]: and be backing up Nadia.

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia's seen everyone else have their day,

[00:04:25] [SPEAKER_01]: their graduation and now she's being treated

[00:04:27] [SPEAKER_01]: as less than important.

[00:04:29] [SPEAKER_01]: And therefore she's gonna think herself

[00:04:31] [SPEAKER_01]: is less than important than everyone else.

[00:04:33] [SPEAKER_01]: And I can't believe that none of these people

[00:04:35] [SPEAKER_01]: are seeing that.

[00:04:36] [SPEAKER_01]: And it's one of those situations

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_01]: where I have to ask because Erin seems

[00:04:39] [SPEAKER_01]: to have a past history of this kind of behavior

[00:04:41] [SPEAKER_01]: is what is she actually bringing to your lives here?

[00:04:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Honestly, but Opie's first update comes in

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_01]: and says there's two days after D-Day

[00:04:50] [SPEAKER_01]: and I finally come bearing an update.

[00:04:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I've had to condense it quite a bit

[00:04:53] [SPEAKER_01]: because a lot has happened.

[00:04:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Before I start, Nadia wanted me to thank everyone

[00:04:57] [SPEAKER_01]: who congratulated her on her graduation.

[00:05:00] [SPEAKER_01]: She was overwhelmed by the support you all gave her,

[00:05:03] [SPEAKER_01]: especially after she faced such opposition from our family.

[00:05:07] [SPEAKER_01]: So let's start.

[00:05:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Last Friday, Leo and I went to speak

[00:05:10] [SPEAKER_01]: to our parents in Erin.

[00:05:12] [SPEAKER_01]: I wanted to tell them that I'd be pulling my son

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_01]: from the wedding.

[00:05:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Our older siblings ended up turning up as well.

[00:05:18] [SPEAKER_01]: So it was us four standing up for Nadia.

[00:05:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Leo has spoken to them the night before

[00:05:23] [SPEAKER_01]: and helped them see things more clearly from Nadia's eyes.

[00:05:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Apparently, it didn't sink in with them

[00:05:29] [SPEAKER_01]: that Erin chose the date intentionally.

[00:05:32] [SPEAKER_01]: There was a lot of yelling.

[00:05:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin accused me of trying to sabotage her wedding.

[00:05:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Our parents tried to convince me

[00:05:38] [SPEAKER_01]: to let them take my son to the wedding

[00:05:40] [SPEAKER_01]: but I stood my ground.

[00:05:41] [SPEAKER_01]: I felt a lot stronger with my older siblings with me.

[00:05:44] [SPEAKER_01]: There's only two years between me and Erin after all.

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not much of an older brother.

[00:05:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Luckily, Lydia was there.

[00:05:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Her words carry more weight as the eldest

[00:05:53] [SPEAKER_01]: and she didn't give Erin or my parents room to argue

[00:05:56] [SPEAKER_01]: as she told them that Erin chose the date intentionally,

[00:06:00] [SPEAKER_01]: admitted as much in front of me and Leo

[00:06:03] [SPEAKER_01]: and that this was normal behavior for her.

[00:06:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Lydia told them that if they continued

[00:06:07] [SPEAKER_01]: to favor Erin so blatantly,

[00:06:09] [SPEAKER_01]: the rest of us would go no contact

[00:06:10] [SPEAKER_01]: and Lexi would likely follow in the future.

[00:06:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Our dad started yelling,

[00:06:15] [SPEAKER_01]: none of us but Erin surprisingly.

[00:06:18] [SPEAKER_01]: I've never seen him so angry before

[00:06:20] [SPEAKER_01]: and to see it directed at Erin was shocking.

[00:06:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Our mom asked us to leave.

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_01]: We didn't hear from anyone on that side until Monday

[00:06:28] [SPEAKER_01]: when Erin's fiance George asked to meet us

[00:06:31] [SPEAKER_01]: at our parents.

[00:06:32] [SPEAKER_01]: He apologized in Adia.

[00:06:33] [SPEAKER_01]: He didn't know that the wedding and graduation

[00:06:35] [SPEAKER_01]: overlapped nor did he know

[00:06:37] [SPEAKER_01]: that it was something Erin did on purpose.

[00:06:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Our dad was the one to tell him.

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_01]: What followed was a long talk between us

[00:06:44] [SPEAKER_01]: during which we all aired our grievances.

[00:06:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I told our parents that we all felt

[00:06:49] [SPEAKER_01]: that they valued Erin more

[00:06:51] [SPEAKER_01]: and none of us mattered to them compared to her.

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Her artwork always went up on the fridge,

[00:06:55] [SPEAKER_01]: ours always went in the drawer.

[00:06:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I told him that as a parent

[00:06:58] [SPEAKER_01]: I could never imagine treating my child like that.

[00:07:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin tried to argue.

[00:07:03] [SPEAKER_01]: She tried to tell us

[00:07:04] [SPEAKER_01]: that we were trying to turn her into a bad guy,

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_01]: trying to turn our parents against her

[00:07:08] [SPEAKER_01]: trying to sabotage her wedding.

[00:07:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Our mum told her to be quiet,

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_01]: that it was our time to talk.

[00:07:15] [SPEAKER_01]: George stepped in to tell us

[00:07:16] [SPEAKER_01]: that he didn't expect us to attend the wedding

[00:07:18] [SPEAKER_01]: but we were welcome to attend the reception.

[00:07:20] [SPEAKER_01]: He went so far as to say that

[00:07:22] [SPEAKER_01]: he wished he could have canceled the wedding altogether

[00:07:25] [SPEAKER_01]: but it only cost him more money

[00:07:26] [SPEAKER_01]: that he had spent by bringing it forward.

[00:07:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Mum's willingness to hear us out

[00:07:31] [SPEAKER_01]: lasted less than 24 hours.

[00:07:33] [SPEAKER_01]: By Tuesday she was begging us to reconsider.

[00:07:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Apparently our feelings meant nothing

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_01]: in the face of Erin's dire stress

[00:07:39] [SPEAKER_01]: and the fact that people would be questioning our absence

[00:07:41] [SPEAKER_01]: on the big day.

[00:07:43] [SPEAKER_01]: Haven't spoken to my mum since

[00:07:44] [SPEAKER_01]: but I did ask my dad to bring some of Nadia's things

[00:07:47] [SPEAKER_01]: because she's going to be staying with me full time.

[00:07:50] [SPEAKER_01]: We've officially gone no contact with our mother.

[00:07:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad took Nadia out for an early graduation celebration

[00:07:56] [SPEAKER_01]: on Wednesday.

[00:07:57] [SPEAKER_01]: They had a daddy door today

[00:07:58] [SPEAKER_01]: but I think that she really needed.

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_01]: He apologized for a lot of things

[00:08:01] [SPEAKER_01]: and told her he wanted to do the same with the rest of us

[00:08:04] [SPEAKER_01]: but Wednesday was about her.

[00:08:06] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm happy that she got the one on one time with him.

[00:08:09] [SPEAKER_01]: She was happy coming home to me.

[00:08:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Last sibling group chat she said

[00:08:12] [SPEAKER_01]: that she really thinks dad is trying

[00:08:14] [SPEAKER_01]: to mend bridges with us even if mum won't.

[00:08:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad also turned up early yesterday morning.

[00:08:20] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm talking 6 30 a.m. to give Nadia flowers.

[00:08:24] [SPEAKER_01]: He told her that he was proud of her.

[00:08:26] [SPEAKER_01]: George even called while he was getting ready

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_01]: for his big day to congratulate Nadia

[00:08:29] [SPEAKER_01]: which I really appreciated.

[00:08:32] [SPEAKER_01]: We didn't hear from mum or Erin.

[00:08:34] [SPEAKER_01]: My paternal grandma ended up coming

[00:08:35] [SPEAKER_01]: to the graduation with us.

[00:08:37] [SPEAKER_01]: It was a great day, like a really great day.

[00:08:40] [SPEAKER_01]: We didn't think about the wedding.

[00:08:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Didn't think about Erin.

[00:08:43] [SPEAKER_01]: Just had fun together.

[00:08:45] [SPEAKER_01]: My son got to wear his aunt's cap and gown

[00:08:47] [SPEAKER_01]: and nearly drowned in the fabric.

[00:08:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Our grandma tried on the cap too.

[00:08:51] [SPEAKER_01]: He took photos and sent them to our dad

[00:08:53] [SPEAKER_01]: who posted them in a Facebook post he wrote to.

[00:08:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Congratulations both Erin on her wedding

[00:08:58] [SPEAKER_01]: and Nadia on her graduation.

[00:09:00] [SPEAKER_01]: And we laughed about how it must have

[00:09:01] [SPEAKER_01]: pissed off our newly wedded sister.

[00:09:04] [SPEAKER_01]: We went out for dinner and we as siblings

[00:09:06] [SPEAKER_01]: gifted Nadia money for a week away with her best friend

[00:09:09] [SPEAKER_01]: which somebody suggested in a comment on the initial post.

[00:09:12] [SPEAKER_01]: I text George my congratulations.

[00:09:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Despite everything, I do hope he and Erin

[00:09:17] [SPEAKER_01]: are happy together.

[00:09:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Well she might not love us.

[00:09:19] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't doubt that Erin loves him.

[00:09:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes she wants a spotlight in her moment

[00:09:24] [SPEAKER_01]: but I don't think she's marrying him just for that.

[00:09:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Bringing the wedding forward?

[00:09:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.

[00:09:29] [SPEAKER_01]: That's a hugely malicious tactic

[00:09:30] [SPEAKER_01]: to bring herself more attention.

[00:09:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Marrying him for the sake of having a wedding?

[00:09:35] [SPEAKER_01]: She isn't that type of narcissist.

[00:09:37] [SPEAKER_01]: As of right now, I plan on staying no contact with my mom

[00:09:40] [SPEAKER_01]: until she makes some big changes.

[00:09:42] [SPEAKER_01]: This is a sentiment shared not only by the majority

[00:09:45] [SPEAKER_01]: of my siblings but is also encouraged

[00:09:47] [SPEAKER_01]: by our dad and grandma.

[00:09:48] [SPEAKER_01]: She's tried reaching out to me and my partner

[00:09:50] [SPEAKER_01]: mostly berating us for not attending the wedding

[00:09:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and accusing us of planning

[00:09:54] [SPEAKER_01]: to keep her grandchild away from her.

[00:09:56] [SPEAKER_01]: At the moment, our summer looks busy

[00:09:58] [SPEAKER_01]: but planning on filling it with as many family outings

[00:10:01] [SPEAKER_01]: as possible before Nadia leaves for college.

[00:10:04] [SPEAKER_01]: We've also got Josh's 29th birthday to plan.

[00:10:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Our dad's even joining in.

[00:10:09] [SPEAKER_01]: This might cause a bigger rift between him and mom

[00:10:11] [SPEAKER_01]: but for now, at least it looks like we're his priority.

[00:10:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Lydia's threat really did something to him.

[00:10:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Thanks everyone who left comments on the original post.

[00:10:20] [SPEAKER_01]: I know they really cheered Nadia up

[00:10:22] [SPEAKER_01]: when she was worrying about whether or not

[00:10:23] [SPEAKER_01]: she was doing the right thing by choosing herself.

[00:10:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Part of me wishes we could have taken this stand earlier

[00:10:28] [SPEAKER_01]: but it took us a while to find our voices.

[00:10:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Looking into the future,

[00:10:32] [SPEAKER_01]: I do see two empty spaces at my own wedding

[00:10:34] [SPEAKER_01]: but I also see five siblings cheering me on.

[00:10:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm happy with that.

[00:10:39] [SPEAKER_01]: And we do have more updates in a second

[00:10:41] [SPEAKER_01]: but I just wanted to touch on about OPs

[00:10:44] [SPEAKER_01]: to say and about finding their voices

[00:10:45] [SPEAKER_01]: and it's like I always say

[00:10:46] [SPEAKER_01]: when you had this sort of behavior

[00:10:48] [SPEAKER_01]: normalized all your life,

[00:10:50] [SPEAKER_01]: it's hard to break that cycle

[00:10:51] [SPEAKER_01]: but I'm glad that you have broken that cycle

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_01]: especially for your sister.

[00:10:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Lydia sounds amazing at the same time as well.

[00:10:59] [SPEAKER_01]: She sounds like she's taken no shit

[00:11:01] [SPEAKER_01]: but anyway, OP comes in with update two

[00:11:04] [SPEAKER_01]: and says it's been about five months

[00:11:06] [SPEAKER_01]: since I've last posted.

[00:11:07] [SPEAKER_01]: I've had some requests for an update.

[00:11:09] [SPEAKER_01]: I figured I'd sit down and write one up.

[00:11:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Bear in mind a lot can happen in five months

[00:11:14] [SPEAKER_01]: and that's definitely true for this.

[00:11:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Let me start off with July.

[00:11:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin and George went on their honeymoon

[00:11:19] [SPEAKER_01]: and their absence sent our mom into a frenzy.

[00:11:21] [SPEAKER_01]: She wasn't used to having no one around.

[00:11:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Someone was always visiting, mostly Erin

[00:11:27] [SPEAKER_01]: but the rest of us would visit out of obligation

[00:11:29] [SPEAKER_01]: and to see Nadia and Lexi

[00:11:31] [SPEAKER_01]: with Erin on her honeymoon

[00:11:33] [SPEAKER_01]: and the rest of us no contact.

[00:11:35] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom had no visitors and she really didn't like that.

[00:11:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Literally the day after Erin left

[00:11:40] [SPEAKER_01]: we started getting bombarded with phone calls.

[00:11:43] [SPEAKER_01]: She tried convincing Nadia first

[00:11:44] [SPEAKER_01]: which Lydia thought was a strategic move

[00:11:47] [SPEAKER_01]: because Nadia is the more timid of all of us

[00:11:49] [SPEAKER_01]: thus more likely to be persuaded

[00:11:52] [SPEAKER_01]: when Nadia turned her down

[00:11:53] [SPEAKER_01]: she turned her sights on the rest of us.

[00:11:56] [SPEAKER_01]: We all got identical phone calls

[00:11:57] [SPEAKER_01]: with her trying to persuade us to go visit her

[00:11:59] [SPEAKER_01]: to understand her, to see things from Erin's perspective.

[00:12:03] [SPEAKER_01]: She even brought up the circumstances

[00:12:04] [SPEAKER_01]: of Erin's premature birth

[00:12:06] [SPEAKER_01]: and how it was a miracle that she was even here.

[00:12:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Josh told her to do better with Lexi

[00:12:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Lydia blocked her number.

[00:12:13] [SPEAKER_01]: When the phone calls didn't work

[00:12:15] [SPEAKER_01]: she started turning up at our homes.

[00:12:17] [SPEAKER_01]: She continued spewing much of the same shit

[00:12:19] [SPEAKER_01]: she had over the phone and before the wedding.

[00:12:22] [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't understand what she'd done so wrong

[00:12:24] [SPEAKER_01]: by retreating her like this.

[00:12:26] [SPEAKER_01]: She called me ungrateful and disrespectful.

[00:12:29] [SPEAKER_01]: She accused us of harboring unnecessary jealousy towards Erin

[00:12:32] [SPEAKER_01]: and that she loved us all equally.

[00:12:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't respond to these comments

[00:12:35] [SPEAKER_01]: I was just trying to prevent her from going inside

[00:12:37] [SPEAKER_01]: and saying the same thing to Nadia

[00:12:39] [SPEAKER_01]: who was with my partner and son in the living room.

[00:12:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Her comments didn't deserve a response

[00:12:44] [SPEAKER_01]: and when she was done

[00:12:45] [SPEAKER_01]: I asked her to leave as calmly as I could

[00:12:47] [SPEAKER_01]: but truthfully I felt a little like crying.

[00:12:51] [SPEAKER_01]: But who wouldn't feel shitty with their mom

[00:12:52] [SPEAKER_01]: yelling in their face like that

[00:12:54] [SPEAKER_01]: trying to downplay years of pain

[00:12:55] [SPEAKER_01]: and calling it unnecessary jealousy?

[00:12:59] [SPEAKER_01]: My siblings and I have been let down time and time again

[00:13:01] [SPEAKER_01]: by her not dad ever since Erin was born.

[00:13:04] [SPEAKER_01]: They missed out on so many things over the years

[00:13:07] [SPEAKER_01]: both big and small

[00:13:09] [SPEAKER_01]: but we had one thing, one thing

[00:13:11] [SPEAKER_01]: one thing that they never missed

[00:13:13] [SPEAKER_01]: and we were happy with just that one thing

[00:13:15] [SPEAKER_01]: and that was our high school graduations

[00:13:18] [SPEAKER_01]: but they couldn't even give that to Nadia.

[00:13:20] [SPEAKER_01]: All we had was our high school graduations

[00:13:23] [SPEAKER_01]: they missed Josh's college graduation

[00:13:25] [SPEAKER_01]: because Erin broke her leg.

[00:13:27] [SPEAKER_01]: It was an accident I get that

[00:13:28] [SPEAKER_01]: but they never made it up to him.

[00:13:30] [SPEAKER_01]: They never celebrated this huge achievement afterwards

[00:13:32] [SPEAKER_01]: and he just had to grin and bear it.

[00:13:35] [SPEAKER_01]: Our mom didn't turn up to my partner's babysitter

[00:13:37] [SPEAKER_01]: after making such a huge fuss about it

[00:13:39] [SPEAKER_01]: because our mom didn't turn up to my partners

[00:13:41] [SPEAKER_01]: and it says babysitter

[00:13:42] [SPEAKER_01]: but I'm assuming baby shower

[00:13:44] [SPEAKER_01]: after making such a huge fuss about it

[00:13:46] [SPEAKER_01]: because Erin didn't want to go

[00:13:48] [SPEAKER_01]: and wanted them to get their nails done together instead.

[00:13:51] [SPEAKER_01]: But our jealousy is unnecessary.

[00:13:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Sorry.

[00:13:55] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't know how I managed to stay calm

[00:13:57] [SPEAKER_01]: when she was yelling at me but I did.

[00:13:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Asking her to leave made her switch tactics though

[00:14:02] [SPEAKER_01]: and she started calling out for my son

[00:14:04] [SPEAKER_01]: trying to coax him to go to her

[00:14:05] [SPEAKER_01]: and telling me that she had a right to see her grandson.

[00:14:08] [SPEAKER_01]: My partner stepped in then

[00:14:10] [SPEAKER_01]: because she was seething

[00:14:11] [SPEAKER_01]: and took my place at the door.

[00:14:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom yelled some more

[00:14:14] [SPEAKER_01]: but she left when my partner threatened to call the cops.

[00:14:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom repeated this song and dance with my older siblings

[00:14:20] [SPEAKER_01]: but similarly got nowhere with them.

[00:14:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Then came the Facebook posts.

[00:14:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Indirect rants about ungrateful people

[00:14:27] [SPEAKER_01]: and how shocking it is that some kids

[00:14:30] [SPEAKER_01]: could turn against their parents so easily.

[00:14:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin somehow got involved while on a honeymoon

[00:14:34] [SPEAKER_01]: and called Lydia to scold her for being mean to our mom.

[00:14:38] [SPEAKER_01]: But as I said before, Lydia is angry

[00:14:40] [SPEAKER_01]: and she's had enough.

[00:14:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Whatever she said to Erin

[00:14:42] [SPEAKER_01]: prevented her from calling the rest of us.

[00:14:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Then there was a Facebook post

[00:14:45] [SPEAKER_01]: about how much it hurt to be kept from a grandchild.

[00:14:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Now there were no names mentioned

[00:14:50] [SPEAKER_01]: but there is only one grandchild and that is my son.

[00:14:53] [SPEAKER_01]: My mom's sister called me.

[00:14:55] [SPEAKER_01]: There was yelling and I blocked the number.

[00:14:58] [SPEAKER_01]: I know dad was trying to convince our mom

[00:14:59] [SPEAKER_01]: to just leave us alone.

[00:15:01] [SPEAKER_01]: He kept apologizing

[00:15:02] [SPEAKER_01]: because she just wasn't listening to him.

[00:15:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin came home after two weeks.

[00:15:06] [SPEAKER_01]: She tried reaching out to Lydia again

[00:15:08] [SPEAKER_01]: asking for us all to talk

[00:15:09] [SPEAKER_01]: because, and this is a quote from Lydia,

[00:15:12] [SPEAKER_01]: clearly you, we all have some issues to work out.

[00:15:16] [SPEAKER_01]: We did not turn up.

[00:15:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin was very angry at that

[00:15:19] [SPEAKER_01]: because she's not used to us not turning up for her.

[00:15:22] [SPEAKER_01]: July wasn't all bad though.

[00:15:23] [SPEAKER_01]: While our mom was on a rampage,

[00:15:25] [SPEAKER_01]: our dad was still trying to do better by us

[00:15:27] [SPEAKER_01]: and he's improved a lot.

[00:15:29] [SPEAKER_01]: In July, he and I went out for a meal together

[00:15:31] [SPEAKER_01]: just the two of us and grabbed a drink

[00:15:33] [SPEAKER_01]: and he apologized.

[00:15:34] [SPEAKER_01]: It wasn't a generic apology

[00:15:36] [SPEAKER_01]: that he could have repeated to all of us.

[00:15:38] [SPEAKER_01]: About how sorry he's hurt in neglecting us,

[00:15:40] [SPEAKER_01]: but he brought up specific instances

[00:15:42] [SPEAKER_01]: that he wanted to apologize for.

[00:15:44] [SPEAKER_01]: He thought back on all those years

[00:15:45] [SPEAKER_01]: and picked out moments

[00:15:46] [SPEAKER_01]: that he wanted to apologize to me for.

[00:15:49] [SPEAKER_01]: I know he did the same for the others

[00:15:51] [SPEAKER_01]: but having him apologize

[00:15:52] [SPEAKER_01]: for things like canceling a fishing trip

[00:15:53] [SPEAKER_01]: because Erin needed him

[00:15:55] [SPEAKER_01]: was something I wasn't expecting.

[00:15:57] [SPEAKER_01]: And I've never really cared for fishing

[00:15:59] [SPEAKER_01]: but I wanted to go on that trip

[00:16:00] [SPEAKER_01]: because I always saw it on TV, you know.

[00:16:02] [SPEAKER_01]: I'd always see a dad and son fishing together

[00:16:04] [SPEAKER_01]: and I wanted to have that.

[00:16:06] [SPEAKER_01]: I wanted dad to prove that I was a priority to him

[00:16:09] [SPEAKER_01]: somewhere deep down.

[00:16:10] [SPEAKER_01]: It didn't happen and I never asked again.

[00:16:13] [SPEAKER_01]: But we went fishing in July

[00:16:14] [SPEAKER_01]: what started as a trip between the two of us

[00:16:17] [SPEAKER_01]: soon grew into a family day out

[00:16:18] [SPEAKER_01]: when my siblings expressed an interest

[00:16:20] [SPEAKER_01]: in going fishing too.

[00:16:22] [SPEAKER_01]: My brothers first, then Nadia

[00:16:23] [SPEAKER_01]: and even Lydia who hates the smell of fish.

[00:16:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad brought Lexi and I brought my son

[00:16:28] [SPEAKER_01]: and it was great.

[00:16:29] [SPEAKER_01]: It was one of the best days of my life.

[00:16:32] [SPEAKER_01]: We suck at fishing

[00:16:33] [SPEAKER_01]: but I'm pretty good at collecting seashells.

[00:16:35] [SPEAKER_01]: It was brilliant.

[00:16:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Our parents did end up arguing when dad went home.

[00:16:39] [SPEAKER_01]: I wasn't there so I don't know every little detail

[00:16:41] [SPEAKER_01]: but from what dad told me

[00:16:42] [SPEAKER_01]: the argument was mostly because mom didn't understand

[00:16:45] [SPEAKER_01]: why we were still in contact with him and not her.

[00:16:48] [SPEAKER_01]: She found it insulting

[00:16:49] [SPEAKER_01]: that we were repairing our relationship with him.

[00:16:51] [SPEAKER_01]: She was angry that dad wasn't pushing us to forgive her

[00:16:54] [SPEAKER_01]: or why he wasn't stopping us from acting out.

[00:16:57] [SPEAKER_01]: She was angry that he didn't extend an invitation

[00:16:59] [SPEAKER_01]: to her and Erin for the fishing trip

[00:17:01] [SPEAKER_01]: and she was even angrier

[00:17:03] [SPEAKER_01]: when he explained that their presence

[00:17:04] [SPEAKER_01]: would make us uncomfortable.

[00:17:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Josh turned 29 at the end of July.

[00:17:08] [SPEAKER_01]: We booked an escape room for the five of her siblings

[00:17:10] [SPEAKER_01]: then we met our dad and partners for dinner that evening.

[00:17:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Josh introduced us to his new partner for the first time.

[00:17:16] [SPEAKER_01]: All of our attention was on Josh.

[00:17:18] [SPEAKER_01]: The day was completely about him

[00:17:20] [SPEAKER_01]: which was a first for our family.

[00:17:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Then there was a party thrown by him by his friend

[00:17:24] [SPEAKER_01]: which I came out with a massive hangover.

[00:17:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom started giving us the silent treatment

[00:17:29] [SPEAKER_01]: in the middle of August.

[00:17:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad moved out in September.

[00:17:32] [SPEAKER_01]: While we were getting the silent treatment

[00:17:34] [SPEAKER_01]: dad was bearing the brunt of her anger

[00:17:36] [SPEAKER_01]: and it really took it out of him.

[00:17:38] [SPEAKER_01]: He was trying to do better by us

[00:17:39] [SPEAKER_01]: than she was still trying to villainize us.

[00:17:41] [SPEAKER_01]: And he ultimately told her

[00:17:42] [SPEAKER_01]: that if she didn't take accountability

[00:17:44] [SPEAKER_01]: for her actions soon

[00:17:45] [SPEAKER_01]: then he'd be contacting the lawyer.

[00:17:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom didn't take him seriously.

[00:17:49] [SPEAKER_01]: He's been staying in Lydia's guest room since.

[00:17:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom doubled down and said

[00:17:53] [SPEAKER_01]: that he was blind for not seeing

[00:17:54] [SPEAKER_01]: how we were manipulating him

[00:17:56] [SPEAKER_01]: unlike the rest of us.

[00:17:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad obviously still has regular contact with Erin

[00:18:00] [SPEAKER_01]: according to him.

[00:18:01] [SPEAKER_01]: She's even told mom to reconsider.

[00:18:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Unsurprisingly Erin's involvement

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_01]: is what got mom to relent.

[00:18:07] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not sure if she's thinking about

[00:18:09] [SPEAKER_01]: how she's treated us

[00:18:10] [SPEAKER_01]: or if she's silently stewing.

[00:18:12] [SPEAKER_01]: I know she asked dad

[00:18:13] [SPEAKER_01]: if he's going to move back home

[00:18:14] [SPEAKER_01]: but he said that it was better

[00:18:16] [SPEAKER_01]: for them to have space right now.

[00:18:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Personally I'm struggling to see an outcome

[00:18:19] [SPEAKER_01]: where our mom sincerely admits

[00:18:21] [SPEAKER_01]: that she was in the wrong.

[00:18:23] [SPEAKER_01]: I think she has said just to get dad back home

[00:18:25] [SPEAKER_01]: and the rest of us talking to her again.

[00:18:27] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't think she ever hold us

[00:18:28] [SPEAKER_01]: to the same level as Erin.

[00:18:30] [SPEAKER_01]: In brighter news

[00:18:31] [SPEAKER_01]: there's officially less than a year left

[00:18:33] [SPEAKER_01]: into my own wedding.

[00:18:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Currently there is no place for my mom or Erin.

[00:18:37] [SPEAKER_01]: My partner Jade and I are having our father's

[00:18:39] [SPEAKER_01]: wear ties that match me and my groomsmen.

[00:18:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Something I originally didn't plan to do.

[00:18:44] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm happy with the change.

[00:18:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia settled in at college.

[00:18:47] [SPEAKER_01]: She's made some new friends

[00:18:48] [SPEAKER_01]: with kids in her classes

[00:18:49] [SPEAKER_01]: and she's enjoying.

[00:18:50] [SPEAKER_01]: She's happy.

[00:18:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Even though we have an active group chat

[00:18:54] [SPEAKER_01]: she facetimes me every few days just to talk.

[00:18:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Most of what she says

[00:18:58] [SPEAKER_01]: I already read in the group chat.

[00:19:00] [SPEAKER_01]: But I'm always willing to listen to her stories again.

[00:19:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia never used to talk this much.

[00:19:04] [SPEAKER_01]: She looks a lot happier now

[00:19:06] [SPEAKER_01]: than she did five months ago.

[00:19:08] [SPEAKER_01]: I think that's everything.

[00:19:09] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm sorry for the novel

[00:19:10] [SPEAKER_01]: but like I said,

[00:19:11] [SPEAKER_01]: the lock can happen in five months.

[00:19:13] [SPEAKER_01]: And then around seven to eight months later

[00:19:15] [SPEAKER_01]: OP comes in with a new update.

[00:19:19] [SPEAKER_01]: And it starts.

[00:19:20] [SPEAKER_01]: So it's been about seven months

[00:19:21] [SPEAKER_01]: since my last update

[00:19:22] [SPEAKER_01]: and I thought one was well overdue.

[00:19:25] [SPEAKER_01]: I actually intended on sitting down

[00:19:27] [SPEAKER_01]: and writing one out a few months ago.

[00:19:29] [SPEAKER_01]: But life got in the way.

[00:19:30] [SPEAKER_01]: A lot has happened.

[00:19:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Most of it good, some of it not.

[00:19:33] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm sure you can guess what

[00:19:34] [SPEAKER_01]: or who the reason for the not good moments were.

[00:19:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Mum was silent through Lydia's birthday in October

[00:19:40] [SPEAKER_01]: but made a huge song and dance for Erin's in November.

[00:19:43] [SPEAKER_01]: None of us make it a habit

[00:19:45] [SPEAKER_01]: to check her social media accounts

[00:19:46] [SPEAKER_01]: and honestly would have blocked her

[00:19:48] [SPEAKER_01]: if it weren't for Lexi.

[00:19:49] [SPEAKER_01]: But Leo sent a screenshot

[00:19:50] [SPEAKER_01]: in the group chat about a post she had made.

[00:19:53] [SPEAKER_01]: The post essentially painted

[00:19:54] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin as the perfect child.

[00:19:55] [SPEAKER_01]: A precious angel

[00:19:58] [SPEAKER_01]: and said how she'd always be proud of her.

[00:20:00] [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't even mention Lydia on her page at all

[00:20:02] [SPEAKER_01]: during her birthday.

[00:20:04] [SPEAKER_01]: But I can't say I'm surprised.

[00:20:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Thanksgiving was different but fun.

[00:20:08] [SPEAKER_01]: We all drove to our paternal grandparents place

[00:20:10] [SPEAKER_01]: a few hours away to spend it with them.

[00:20:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Technically it was supposed to be an in-law year

[00:20:14] [SPEAKER_01]: since Jade and I tend to switch

[00:20:16] [SPEAKER_01]: who we spend it with

[00:20:17] [SPEAKER_01]: so that neither one of our families were being left out.

[00:20:20] [SPEAKER_01]: But she suggested we switch it up this year

[00:20:22] [SPEAKER_01]: so I could be with my siblings

[00:20:23] [SPEAKER_01]: on the first big holiday since the fallout.

[00:20:26] [SPEAKER_01]: My in-laws are great people

[00:20:27] [SPEAKER_01]: and I've been really supportive throughout all of this

[00:20:30] [SPEAKER_01]: and I'm really grateful for them too.

[00:20:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Mum didn't reach out to us on the day

[00:20:34] [SPEAKER_01]: but I could tell she was fuming.

[00:20:36] [SPEAKER_01]: It didn't help that she was being asked questions

[00:20:38] [SPEAKER_01]: after Lydia posted a Thanksgiving Day photo

[00:20:40] [SPEAKER_01]: that didn't include her or Erin.

[00:20:43] [SPEAKER_01]: In December, she started a group chat

[00:20:45] [SPEAKER_01]: with all of us and dad essentially telling us

[00:20:47] [SPEAKER_01]: it was time to stop this petty drama

[00:20:49] [SPEAKER_01]: to focus on family.

[00:20:51] [SPEAKER_01]: But none of us are stupid.

[00:20:52] [SPEAKER_01]: We all know that she wanted to show off her picture

[00:20:55] [SPEAKER_01]: of perfect family over Christmas

[00:20:56] [SPEAKER_01]: and how could she do that

[00:20:57] [SPEAKER_01]: when all but two of her children can't stand to be near her?

[00:21:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin was in the group but didn't speak up

[00:21:03] [SPEAKER_01]: which was odd for her

[00:21:04] [SPEAKER_01]: but none of us really thought much of it at the time.

[00:21:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad said he'd swing by to see Lexi

[00:21:09] [SPEAKER_01]: but he had no interest in spending Christmas with her

[00:21:12] [SPEAKER_01]: until she was ready to admit the pain they'd caused us.

[00:21:15] [SPEAKER_01]: A week later my birthday also went ignored by her

[00:21:18] [SPEAKER_01]: so that was fine.

[00:21:19] [SPEAKER_01]: It only proved that she had no intention

[00:21:21] [SPEAKER_01]: of admitting that she was the bad guy.

[00:21:23] [SPEAKER_01]: She got more desperate as Christmas drew closer.

[00:21:26] [SPEAKER_01]: The messages and phone calls started up again

[00:21:28] [SPEAKER_01]: but I could ignore those for the most part

[00:21:30] [SPEAKER_01]: but I couldn't ignore was coming home from work

[00:21:32] [SPEAKER_01]: to find her on my doorstep.

[00:21:34] [SPEAKER_01]: She told me she'd been waiting for ages

[00:21:36] [SPEAKER_01]: like I was expecting her to visit

[00:21:38] [SPEAKER_01]: and had done it intentionally

[00:21:39] [SPEAKER_01]: which honestly, I probably would have

[00:21:41] [SPEAKER_01]: given the state of our relationship.

[00:21:43] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm just grateful my family wasn't home.

[00:21:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Jade was on her way back from work herself

[00:21:47] [SPEAKER_01]: and our son was with her parents.

[00:21:49] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't want to invite her inside

[00:21:51] [SPEAKER_01]: but honestly, given how desperate she looked

[00:21:53] [SPEAKER_01]: I also didn't want to deal with her

[00:21:55] [SPEAKER_01]: where my neighbors could see.

[00:21:57] [SPEAKER_01]: This woman told me that Christmas

[00:21:58] [SPEAKER_01]: was about family and forgiveness.

[00:22:01] [SPEAKER_01]: She told me that I was taking it too far

[00:22:04] [SPEAKER_01]: by keeping her grandson away from her

[00:22:05] [SPEAKER_01]: and how confused he must be without her.

[00:22:08] [SPEAKER_01]: She said it was like I was using my son to punish her.

[00:22:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I told her it was better this way

[00:22:13] [SPEAKER_01]: because we all knew what would happen

[00:22:14] [SPEAKER_01]: if Erin had a child someday.

[00:22:16] [SPEAKER_01]: My son would be pushed aside just like the rest of us were

[00:22:19] [SPEAKER_01]: and I didn't want that for him.

[00:22:21] [SPEAKER_01]: She said I was being ridiculous

[00:22:22] [SPEAKER_01]: and once again use that line,

[00:22:25] [SPEAKER_01]: I love you all equally.

[00:22:27] [SPEAKER_01]: I asked her to leave

[00:22:28] [SPEAKER_01]: because nothing was changing my stance

[00:22:30] [SPEAKER_01]: and I wasn't going to be spending Christmas with her.

[00:22:33] [SPEAKER_01]: She got angry.

[00:22:34] [SPEAKER_01]: She started yelling

[00:22:34] [SPEAKER_01]: and while I want to say I kept my composure.

[00:22:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't.

[00:22:38] [SPEAKER_01]: I started yelling too.

[00:22:40] [SPEAKER_01]: The more I yelled, the more worked up I got

[00:22:41] [SPEAKER_01]: to the point I started shedding tears.

[00:22:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Read it.

[00:22:45] [SPEAKER_01]: This was years of her rushing to the surface.

[00:22:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't think I will ever understand

[00:22:49] [SPEAKER_01]: how she can claim to love us all equally

[00:22:50] [SPEAKER_01]: but then tell her crying son to stop being so dramatic.

[00:22:54] [SPEAKER_01]: She only left when Jade come back

[00:22:56] [SPEAKER_01]: and saw the state I was in.

[00:22:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Jade's little but fierce

[00:22:59] [SPEAKER_01]: and would do anything for me and my son.

[00:23:02] [SPEAKER_01]: I swear my mom left terrified of her that day.

[00:23:05] [SPEAKER_01]: The social media post picked up again.

[00:23:07] [SPEAKER_01]: She played victim.

[00:23:08] [SPEAKER_01]: She had posts about children not respecting

[00:23:10] [SPEAKER_01]: the sacrifices mothers make for them

[00:23:11] [SPEAKER_01]: and stuff like that.

[00:23:13] [SPEAKER_01]: She posted how we didn't appreciate

[00:23:15] [SPEAKER_01]: all that she had done for us

[00:23:16] [SPEAKER_01]: but we all ignored it.

[00:23:18] [SPEAKER_01]: We did our own Christmas.

[00:23:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Jade, our son and I visited the in-laws

[00:23:21] [SPEAKER_01]: on Christmas morning.

[00:23:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Washed our son and nieces, opened their presents there

[00:23:25] [SPEAKER_01]: and then went over to Lydia's house.

[00:23:27] [SPEAKER_01]: She offered to host us all this year.

[00:23:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Had took his place in the kitchen,

[00:23:31] [SPEAKER_01]: joined by his assistant chefs Josh

[00:23:33] [SPEAKER_01]: and Lydia's husband.

[00:23:35] [SPEAKER_01]: We didn't see our Marmour airing until January.

[00:23:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Lexie turned five so there was a party

[00:23:39] [SPEAKER_01]: and we weren't about to punish our sister

[00:23:41] [SPEAKER_01]: for the actions of the demon that birthed us.

[00:23:44] [SPEAKER_01]: So we went.

[00:23:46] [SPEAKER_01]: There were some questions but people didn't push

[00:23:48] [SPEAKER_01]: when it was obvious that none of us wanted to get into it.

[00:23:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom acted like everything was fine

[00:23:53] [SPEAKER_01]: but Erin stayed away from us.

[00:23:55] [SPEAKER_01]: At the end of the party as we're helping clean up

[00:23:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom said it was good

[00:23:59] [SPEAKER_01]: that we're finally putting things behind us.

[00:24:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Lydia told her that the only thing

[00:24:03] [SPEAKER_01]: we were putting behind us was her.

[00:24:05] [SPEAKER_01]: That started her off again

[00:24:06] [SPEAKER_01]: but she quickly realized she was outnumbered

[00:24:08] [SPEAKER_01]: and headed inside.

[00:24:10] [SPEAKER_01]: That was when Erin approached us with her husband.

[00:24:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Honestly, I was expecting her to tell us

[00:24:14] [SPEAKER_01]: to go easy on our mom or something

[00:24:15] [SPEAKER_01]: but instead she apologized.

[00:24:17] [SPEAKER_01]: She said she'd been doing a lot of thinking

[00:24:19] [SPEAKER_01]: since all of this started

[00:24:20] [SPEAKER_01]: and she realized that she treated us badly

[00:24:22] [SPEAKER_01]: her whole life

[00:24:23] [SPEAKER_01]: and part of us was influenced

[00:24:24] [SPEAKER_01]: by the way our parents treated her.

[00:24:26] [SPEAKER_01]: She told us she didn't expect us to forgive her

[00:24:28] [SPEAKER_01]: but that she just wanted to tell us she was sorry.

[00:24:31] [SPEAKER_01]: We left a little while later.

[00:24:33] [SPEAKER_01]: There was silence at the end of January

[00:24:34] [SPEAKER_01]: and in February for Leo and Nadia's birthdays

[00:24:37] [SPEAKER_01]: but we were expecting that.

[00:24:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Our days never did matter to her after all.

[00:24:42] [SPEAKER_01]: I got married in April without my mom present.

[00:24:45] [SPEAKER_01]: I was hands down one of the best days of my life

[00:24:47] [SPEAKER_01]: second only to the birth of my son.

[00:24:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Jade and I were surrounded by the people we cared about most

[00:24:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and who cared about us in return.

[00:24:54] [SPEAKER_01]: I had both of my brothers as my best men.

[00:24:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia and Lydia were bridesmaids too.

[00:24:59] [SPEAKER_01]: It was better than anything I could have imagined.

[00:25:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Honestly, I'm still blown away

[00:25:03] [SPEAKER_01]: by the fact that I now get to call Jade my wife.

[00:25:06] [SPEAKER_01]: It's been amazing

[00:25:07] [SPEAKER_01]: but I'm sure you're all wondering

[00:25:08] [SPEAKER_01]: how my mother handled this.

[00:25:10] [SPEAKER_01]: I can tell you plainly that she did not handle it well.

[00:25:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Truthfully, when we sent out invitations

[00:25:15] [SPEAKER_01]: part of me hoped that the news just wouldn't get back to her.

[00:25:19] [SPEAKER_01]: I hoped it would go smoothly enough

[00:25:20] [SPEAKER_01]: that I wouldn't actually have to talk to her

[00:25:22] [SPEAKER_01]: about this decision

[00:25:23] [SPEAKER_01]: but of course that'd be too easy.

[00:25:25] [SPEAKER_01]: She showed up a few days later banging on my door

[00:25:27] [SPEAKER_01]: demanding I talk to her.

[00:25:29] [SPEAKER_01]: I went out, I didn't let her in

[00:25:31] [SPEAKER_01]: despite knowing that the neighbors could see us

[00:25:33] [SPEAKER_01]: and that was solely because I didn't want her inside

[00:25:35] [SPEAKER_01]: my home where my son was.

[00:25:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't want her scaring him

[00:25:38] [SPEAKER_01]: like she was undoubtedly doing.

[00:25:41] [SPEAKER_01]: She demanded to know what I was playing at,

[00:25:42] [SPEAKER_01]: how I could be so cruel,

[00:25:44] [SPEAKER_01]: how I could exclude her from such a special day.

[00:25:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I told her plainly that my wedding was a day for me

[00:25:49] [SPEAKER_01]: to celebrate with my close loved ones

[00:25:51] [SPEAKER_01]: and she wasn't someone I considered close

[00:25:54] [SPEAKER_01]: or a loved one anymore.

[00:25:55] [SPEAKER_01]: She'd made her bed, she had to lie in it.

[00:25:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Part of me worried that she'd turn up at my wedding.

[00:26:01] [SPEAKER_01]: She came by the house a few more times

[00:26:02] [SPEAKER_01]: but stopped when I threatened to call the cops.

[00:26:05] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't do it soon

[00:26:06] [SPEAKER_01]: because I guess I'm soft at heart

[00:26:07] [SPEAKER_01]: and didn't want to see my mom in any trouble.

[00:26:10] [SPEAKER_01]: But every time she showed up to spew some bullshit

[00:26:12] [SPEAKER_01]: about me being a terrible son

[00:26:14] [SPEAKER_01]: and doing this to her, it drained me.

[00:26:16] [SPEAKER_01]: There was social media posts of course

[00:26:18] [SPEAKER_01]: had relatives reaching out to me that I should invite her

[00:26:20] [SPEAKER_01]: what kind of son am I, et cetera.

[00:26:22] [SPEAKER_01]: They stopped when I told them

[00:26:23] [SPEAKER_01]: I'd take back their invites too.

[00:26:25] [SPEAKER_01]: No one mentioned her at the wedding

[00:26:27] [SPEAKER_01]: and she didn't try showing up.

[00:26:29] [SPEAKER_01]: She did however try to prevent Lexi

[00:26:31] [SPEAKER_01]: from being a flower girl like I promised

[00:26:33] [SPEAKER_01]: but dad quickly nipped that in the bud

[00:26:35] [SPEAKER_01]: which takes me to the next point.

[00:26:37] [SPEAKER_01]: My parents are officially over.

[00:26:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad sent her divorce papers sometime in February

[00:26:41] [SPEAKER_01]: and I don't think he's looking back at all.

[00:26:44] [SPEAKER_01]: This is something that also shocked me

[00:26:45] [SPEAKER_01]: because this time last year

[00:26:47] [SPEAKER_01]: he was much the same as she was.

[00:26:50] [SPEAKER_01]: He was someone who cared more about Aaron than any of us.

[00:26:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Someone who brushed off her achievements

[00:26:54] [SPEAKER_01]: if they somehow interfered with hers

[00:26:56] [SPEAKER_01]: and now he would advocate for us.

[00:26:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Every time mom posted something on social media

[00:27:01] [SPEAKER_01]: belittling us, he responded with a post uplifting us.

[00:27:04] [SPEAKER_01]: I never imagined having such a good relationship with my dad

[00:27:07] [SPEAKER_01]: but here we are.

[00:27:09] [SPEAKER_01]: We helped him move into his own place back in March.

[00:27:11] [SPEAKER_01]: He's a new man honestly.

[00:27:13] [SPEAKER_01]: He's worked out a 50-50 custody agreement for Lexi

[00:27:16] [SPEAKER_01]: because as much as he'd be happy to have full custody

[00:27:19] [SPEAKER_01]: he wants to believe that she can change like he did.

[00:27:21] [SPEAKER_01]: He has said however that if he catches

[00:27:23] [SPEAKER_01]: the slightest hint of Lexi being mistreated

[00:27:25] [SPEAKER_01]: like we were, he'd be filing for it.

[00:27:28] [SPEAKER_01]: In the case of my siblings

[00:27:30] [SPEAKER_01]: life has been going good for them too.

[00:27:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Leo got a raise at work and has adopted a dog

[00:27:34] [SPEAKER_01]: that my son is obsessed with

[00:27:36] [SPEAKER_01]: to the point that I think we may need to get a dog ourselves.

[00:27:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Josh and his partner are going strong.

[00:27:41] [SPEAKER_01]: He fits right into our family

[00:27:42] [SPEAKER_01]: and I couldn't be happier for Josh.

[00:27:45] [SPEAKER_01]: He's found someone that really cares about him

[00:27:46] [SPEAKER_01]: and I can tell he's in love.

[00:27:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Maybe they will be wedding bells there soon.

[00:27:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Lexi, well, Lexi's five

[00:27:53] [SPEAKER_01]: so there's really not much going on in her life.

[00:27:55] [SPEAKER_01]: I think she recently made my dad join her tea party.

[00:27:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Quick edit to add, Lexi is obviously aware

[00:28:01] [SPEAKER_01]: that things have changed.

[00:28:02] [SPEAKER_01]: She's naturally confused about it all.

[00:28:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Things changed so much for her in a space of a year

[00:28:06] [SPEAKER_01]: and I can't imagine what it was like for her

[00:28:08] [SPEAKER_01]: living with our parents when mom was angry all the time.

[00:28:11] [SPEAKER_01]: We've let her know that we'll always be there for her

[00:28:13] [SPEAKER_01]: and that we're safe spaces

[00:28:14] [SPEAKER_01]: if she needs to talk about her feelings

[00:28:16] [SPEAKER_01]: or if she has any questions to ask.

[00:28:18] [SPEAKER_01]: We don't want this affecting her more

[00:28:20] [SPEAKER_01]: than it already has.

[00:28:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Josh is the one who's made headway on that.

[00:28:24] [SPEAKER_01]: He works in childcare

[00:28:24] [SPEAKER_01]: and has experience in things like this.

[00:28:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Dad is thinking about setting up therapy for her

[00:28:29] [SPEAKER_01]: but I'm sure you're wondering about Nadia and Erin.

[00:28:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia is great, she's honestly thriving.

[00:28:35] [SPEAKER_01]: I think being away from our mom, Erin

[00:28:36] [SPEAKER_01]: and the pressures at home

[00:28:38] [SPEAKER_01]: has really helped her find herself as a person.

[00:28:40] [SPEAKER_01]: She's made new friends, excelling in class

[00:28:42] [SPEAKER_01]: and she's just an overall happier person

[00:28:45] [SPEAKER_01]: which is all I care about.

[00:28:47] [SPEAKER_01]: She's happy, I'm happy.

[00:28:49] [SPEAKER_01]: She's been invited to move in with my dad

[00:28:51] [SPEAKER_01]: now that he has his own place

[00:28:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and enough room for her and Lexi

[00:28:54] [SPEAKER_01]: which hasn't decided on an answer yet.

[00:28:56] [SPEAKER_01]: She's more than welcome to stay here if she wants.

[00:28:59] [SPEAKER_01]: I know she wants to be closer with our dad.

[00:29:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Our supporter no matter what

[00:29:02] [SPEAKER_01]: and I've told her that she can try with dad if she wants

[00:29:06] [SPEAKER_01]: and she can come back if it's too weird for her.

[00:29:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin is another story.

[00:29:11] [SPEAKER_01]: We're no longer in no contact with her

[00:29:13] [SPEAKER_01]: but we are low contact.

[00:29:15] [SPEAKER_01]: After her apology at Lexi's party

[00:29:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Leah reached out to see if it was genuine.

[00:29:19] [SPEAKER_01]: All of us were pretty stuck on what to do to be honest.

[00:29:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin was never someone to bow her head and apologize

[00:29:24] [SPEAKER_01]: but how could we know if it was genuine and not?

[00:29:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Another ploy to get us to forgive our mom or something.

[00:29:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin asked us to speak with this in person

[00:29:32] [SPEAKER_01]: and Leah reached out to her

[00:29:33] [SPEAKER_01]: and we agreed because we were curious to see how it'd go.

[00:29:37] [SPEAKER_01]: We also agreed that if she tried anything

[00:29:39] [SPEAKER_01]: we'd be leaving immediately and would block her again.

[00:29:42] [SPEAKER_01]: The meeting happened in mid January

[00:29:44] [SPEAKER_01]: between Lexi and Leo's birthdays.

[00:29:46] [SPEAKER_01]: We met at her place.

[00:29:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin looked like a nervous wreck

[00:29:49] [SPEAKER_01]: like she hadn't slept all night

[00:29:51] [SPEAKER_01]: and honestly it was really weird

[00:29:52] [SPEAKER_01]: because she's normally so put together.

[00:29:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Like even when she was throwing tantrum

[00:29:56] [SPEAKER_01]: she looked better than this.

[00:29:58] [SPEAKER_01]: We sat down and she started off by apologizing to us again.

[00:30:01] [SPEAKER_01]: She said that she was needlessly cruel

[00:30:03] [SPEAKER_01]: and unfair to us, especially Nadia

[00:30:06] [SPEAKER_01]: and even apologized for trying to ruin her graduation.

[00:30:09] [SPEAKER_01]: She said when we all backed out of her wedding

[00:30:11] [SPEAKER_01]: she was confused and hurt

[00:30:12] [SPEAKER_01]: because none of us had said no to her before.

[00:30:15] [SPEAKER_01]: She thought we were closer than that

[00:30:16] [SPEAKER_01]: but realized now that it was one sided.

[00:30:19] [SPEAKER_01]: She thought we were close

[00:30:20] [SPEAKER_01]: and we just wanted to be as far away from her as possible.

[00:30:24] [SPEAKER_01]: We asked our questions and she answered everyone.

[00:30:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Why do you think we were close?

[00:30:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Because she'd been acting this way since childhood

[00:30:31] [SPEAKER_01]: partially encouraged by our parents

[00:30:33] [SPEAKER_01]: treatment of us versus her.

[00:30:35] [SPEAKER_01]: I assume that since none of us said anything about it

[00:30:37] [SPEAKER_01]: we were fine with it.

[00:30:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Did you ever feel sorry?

[00:30:40] [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't before this whole fiasco.

[00:30:43] [SPEAKER_01]: It was normal for her to be the center of attention.

[00:30:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Everything was always about her

[00:30:47] [SPEAKER_01]: and she was trying to unlearn that.

[00:30:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Why now?

[00:30:51] [SPEAKER_01]: It came down to her husband.

[00:30:52] [SPEAKER_01]: He tried talking to her a few times

[00:30:54] [SPEAKER_01]: about her treatment of us

[00:30:55] [SPEAKER_01]: but she never saw an issue with it

[00:30:56] [SPEAKER_01]: since, well, we never made it an issue before.

[00:30:59] [SPEAKER_01]: He didn't like that response

[00:31:00] [SPEAKER_01]: but he loved over and she was a lot kinder

[00:31:02] [SPEAKER_01]: outside of our family unit.

[00:31:04] [SPEAKER_01]: So he hoped if he kept talking to her about it

[00:31:06] [SPEAKER_01]: she'd eventually stop.

[00:31:08] [SPEAKER_01]: They fought when she announced

[00:31:09] [SPEAKER_01]: their engagement on Lydia's anniversary

[00:31:11] [SPEAKER_01]: and they fought again

[00:31:12] [SPEAKER_01]: when she booked their party on Nadia's birthday.

[00:31:14] [SPEAKER_01]: He couldn't understand

[00:31:15] [SPEAKER_01]: how she could be so cruel to her family

[00:31:17] [SPEAKER_01]: and she told him she didn't understand

[00:31:19] [SPEAKER_01]: our family dynamic

[00:31:20] [SPEAKER_01]: and that we were cool with it.

[00:31:22] [SPEAKER_01]: The stuff with Nadia's graduation

[00:31:23] [SPEAKER_01]: damned their ruin, their relationship

[00:31:25] [SPEAKER_01]: and I don't know how she convinced him to stay with her

[00:31:27] [SPEAKER_01]: because George admitted

[00:31:29] [SPEAKER_01]: he was very close to walking out the door.

[00:31:31] [SPEAKER_01]: She said she was on our mom's side for a while

[00:31:33] [SPEAKER_01]: because she really did think

[00:31:34] [SPEAKER_01]: we would just act it out.

[00:31:36] [SPEAKER_01]: We'd never been like this before

[00:31:37] [SPEAKER_01]: so why would we like this now?

[00:31:40] [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't get why we're ignoring her

[00:31:41] [SPEAKER_01]: why we would suddenly cut her off

[00:31:43] [SPEAKER_01]: and admittedly had a breakdown over it.

[00:31:45] [SPEAKER_01]: George told her we'd been likely carrying her

[00:31:47] [SPEAKER_01]: to let her to bitterness with us for years.

[00:31:49] [SPEAKER_01]: She said that she knew she was a brat

[00:31:51] [SPEAKER_01]: but didn't realize how bad she really was

[00:31:53] [SPEAKER_01]: until George and our dad laid it all out for her.

[00:31:56] [SPEAKER_01]: That's why she told mom to leave us be

[00:31:59] [SPEAKER_01]: so that we could all have peace from it all

[00:32:00] [SPEAKER_01]: and it turns out dad wasn't the only one

[00:32:03] [SPEAKER_01]: bearing the brunt of mom's anger.

[00:32:05] [SPEAKER_01]: She was constantly blasting Erin's phone

[00:32:07] [SPEAKER_01]: turning up at her place

[00:32:08] [SPEAKER_01]: dragging our names through the mud.

[00:32:10] [SPEAKER_01]: It got worse when dad moved out

[00:32:12] [SPEAKER_01]: and suddenly Erin was all she had in the world.

[00:32:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom called us awful names

[00:32:16] [SPEAKER_01]: that Erin thankfully didn't repeat.

[00:32:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom told Erin that she was all she had now.

[00:32:21] [SPEAKER_01]: George vouched for how bad our mom was.

[00:32:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Said he'd come home from work often

[00:32:25] [SPEAKER_01]: to find Erin staring at a ringing phone.

[00:32:28] [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't want to answer but knew if she didn't

[00:32:30] [SPEAKER_01]: eventually mom would turn up at her house.

[00:32:33] [SPEAKER_01]: I know Erin was awful to us ever since she was born

[00:32:35] [SPEAKER_01]: but it really hurts seeing her like this.

[00:32:38] [SPEAKER_01]: I think she herself was a victim of our mom's behavior

[00:32:40] [SPEAKER_01]: albeit in a drastically different way.

[00:32:43] [SPEAKER_01]: She said she wanted to reach out to us sooner

[00:32:45] [SPEAKER_01]: but knew we probably didn't want to speak to her.

[00:32:48] [SPEAKER_01]: She just couldn't help herself

[00:32:49] [SPEAKER_01]: when she saw us at Lexi's party

[00:32:51] [SPEAKER_01]: and needed to apologize.

[00:32:53] [SPEAKER_01]: We parted ways conflicted.

[00:32:55] [SPEAKER_01]: On one hand Erin had always been selfish.

[00:32:57] [SPEAKER_01]: She'd been manipulative and downright mean.

[00:32:59] [SPEAKER_01]: She always found a way to overshadow us

[00:33:01] [SPEAKER_01]: at every turn and every achievement.

[00:33:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Nadia's graduation was proof of that.

[00:33:05] [SPEAKER_01]: On the other hand, she looked tired.

[00:33:07] [SPEAKER_01]: She looked worn and she looked guilty

[00:33:09] [SPEAKER_01]: and I didn't want to believe.

[00:33:10] [SPEAKER_01]: That was an act put on for the sake of us

[00:33:12] [SPEAKER_01]: getting to forgive her and then our mother.

[00:33:15] [SPEAKER_01]: None of us were sure how to proceed

[00:33:16] [SPEAKER_01]: but then Jade suggested that we invite her to the wedding

[00:33:19] [SPEAKER_01]: or rather we invite her to the reception

[00:33:22] [SPEAKER_01]: after everyone's eaten.

[00:33:23] [SPEAKER_01]: But a few friends coming at that time too

[00:33:25] [SPEAKER_01]: who couldn't attend the wedding itself

[00:33:27] [SPEAKER_01]: due to inescapable engagements.

[00:33:29] [SPEAKER_01]: That way, if Erin did try to bring our mom

[00:33:31] [SPEAKER_01]: security would catch it and would know for certain

[00:33:34] [SPEAKER_01]: whether or not Erin had turned a new leaf.

[00:33:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Reddit, Erin attended the reception.

[00:33:40] [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't bring our mom.

[00:33:42] [SPEAKER_01]: She didn't even mention her.

[00:33:43] [SPEAKER_01]: She and George arrived

[00:33:44] [SPEAKER_01]: and Erin cried as she congratulated me.

[00:33:47] [SPEAKER_01]: She told Jade she looked beautiful and hugged my son.

[00:33:50] [SPEAKER_01]: At some point she took Nadia aside

[00:33:51] [SPEAKER_01]: and when they came back,

[00:33:53] [SPEAKER_01]: they were both a little teary eyed.

[00:33:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh dear, Nadia later told me

[00:33:57] [SPEAKER_01]: that Erin wanted to apologize to her properly one to one

[00:34:00] [SPEAKER_01]: and didn't know if she'd get another opportunity

[00:34:03] [SPEAKER_01]: to do so.

[00:34:04] [SPEAKER_01]: George thanked me for giving Erin a chance.

[00:34:06] [SPEAKER_01]: He told me that she really could be

[00:34:07] [SPEAKER_01]: a warm kindhearted person.

[00:34:09] [SPEAKER_01]: I told him I hoped to meet that version of her someday

[00:34:12] [SPEAKER_01]: and I mean it.

[00:34:13] [SPEAKER_01]: If Erin is truly warm and as kind

[00:34:15] [SPEAKER_01]: and as wonderful as George believes her to be

[00:34:17] [SPEAKER_01]: then I want nothing more to meet

[00:34:19] [SPEAKER_01]: that version of my sister.

[00:34:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Now, you may be wondering,

[00:34:22] [SPEAKER_01]: OP, you forgot to mention Lydia

[00:34:24] [SPEAKER_01]: when talking about your siblings.

[00:34:26] [SPEAKER_01]: That was on purpose.

[00:34:28] [SPEAKER_01]: You see, it's a good thing

[00:34:29] [SPEAKER_01]: dad moved out of her spare room.

[00:34:31] [SPEAKER_01]: He's going to need that space in a few months

[00:34:33] [SPEAKER_01]: and she's not the only one.

[00:34:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I knew Lydia was pregnant

[00:34:36] [SPEAKER_01]: because she sat both me and Jade down

[00:34:38] [SPEAKER_01]: to tell her she was pregnant

[00:34:39] [SPEAKER_01]: and worried about her bridesmaid's dress.

[00:34:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Even offered to step down if it was a problem.

[00:34:44] [SPEAKER_01]: We of course told her not to be ridiculous

[00:34:45] [SPEAKER_01]: and that would cover the cost of any alterations needed.

[00:34:49] [SPEAKER_01]: In the lead up to the wedding,

[00:34:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Jade told me that she planned on having Lydia

[00:34:52] [SPEAKER_01]: make an announcement during the speeches.

[00:34:54] [SPEAKER_01]: I foolishly assumed that Lydia

[00:34:56] [SPEAKER_01]: was going to announce her pregnancy

[00:34:57] [SPEAKER_01]: to our extended family

[00:34:59] [SPEAKER_01]: and while I was a little hesitant

[00:35:00] [SPEAKER_01]: I agreed since Jade wanted this

[00:35:03] [SPEAKER_01]: and well, at least she got in permission

[00:35:05] [SPEAKER_01]: unlike some would have.

[00:35:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Reddit, Lydia made a speech about pregnancy

[00:35:09] [SPEAKER_01]: and how she couldn't wait to be a mom

[00:35:11] [SPEAKER_01]: and how she was grateful to be sharing

[00:35:12] [SPEAKER_01]: at least part of her pregnancy journey with Jade.

[00:35:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Reddit, this is how I found out

[00:35:18] [SPEAKER_01]: my wife was expecting our second child.

[00:35:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Again, I wish I could say I maintained my composure

[00:35:24] [SPEAKER_01]: but I didn't.

[00:35:25] [SPEAKER_01]: I cried, I was so overwhelmed with happiness

[00:35:27] [SPEAKER_01]: that I couldn't help myself

[00:35:28] [SPEAKER_01]: and I'm sure my friends will forever make fun of me for it.

[00:35:32] [SPEAKER_01]: It felt like all the shit we've been through this past year

[00:35:34] [SPEAKER_01]: was all worth it in that moment.

[00:35:36] [SPEAKER_01]: To have my family rally around me in an event

[00:35:38] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm sure somehow would have been made about Erin

[00:35:41] [SPEAKER_01]: and her wedding if my mom had been present.

[00:35:44] [SPEAKER_01]: I haven't spoken much

[00:35:45] [SPEAKER_01]: about how this past year has made me feel.

[00:35:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Truthfully, I have felt like shit for most of it.

[00:35:50] [SPEAKER_01]: I felt like curling up and disappearing.

[00:35:53] [SPEAKER_01]: I felt rotten and useless

[00:35:55] [SPEAKER_01]: simply because my mother told me I was.

[00:35:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I felt sometimes I couldn't show how I was feeling

[00:36:00] [SPEAKER_01]: because Nadia was here

[00:36:01] [SPEAKER_01]: and I didn't want her to blame herself any more than she did.

[00:36:05] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm in therapy now

[00:36:06] [SPEAKER_01]: and I'm not the only one and I'm healing.

[00:36:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Right now I'm happy, I'm so unfathomably happy

[00:36:12] [SPEAKER_01]: that I can barely understand it.

[00:36:15] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm happier than I've ever been

[00:36:16] [SPEAKER_01]: and I know my siblings will say the same.

[00:36:19] [SPEAKER_01]: While our mom will probably say

[00:36:20] [SPEAKER_01]: that our family has fallen apart.

[00:36:22] [SPEAKER_01]: That's not true, hers has.

[00:36:24] [SPEAKER_01]: The family that she made has fallen apart

[00:36:26] [SPEAKER_01]: but ours has grown stronger.

[00:36:28] [SPEAKER_01]: It has grown so unbelievably strong.

[00:36:31] [SPEAKER_01]: We were reunited from before

[00:36:33] [SPEAKER_01]: but it's like now we've upgraded our defenses.

[00:36:35] [SPEAKER_01]: We're coming out of this with stronger relationships

[00:36:37] [SPEAKER_01]: with each other, a real relationship with our dad

[00:36:39] [SPEAKER_01]: and two new family members on the way.

[00:36:42] [SPEAKER_01]: This is what our mom is missing out on

[00:36:43] [SPEAKER_01]: and it's all her own fault.

[00:36:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Maybe I'll update you again in the future.

[00:36:47] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not sure if our mom knows yet

[00:36:49] [SPEAKER_01]: about Lydia and Jay's pregnancies

[00:36:50] [SPEAKER_01]: but the announcement is out there.

[00:36:52] [SPEAKER_01]: We do have her blocked on social media though

[00:36:54] [SPEAKER_01]: so maybe no one's told her the good news.

[00:36:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin hasn't at least.

[00:36:59] [SPEAKER_01]: But if anything happens on that front,

[00:37:01] [SPEAKER_01]: I'll let you know but for now

[00:37:02] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm happy with where my life is.

[00:37:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you all for the support again

[00:37:06] [SPEAKER_01]: and I hope you have an amazing day.

[00:37:09] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not gonna lie, the update got me balling.

[00:37:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Especially the part where, you know,

[00:37:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin was brought back into the fold

[00:37:17] [SPEAKER_01]: and you started making the beginnings of bridges.

[00:37:21] [SPEAKER_01]: I truly wasn't expecting Erin

[00:37:23] [SPEAKER_01]: to make any progress during this at all.

[00:37:25] [SPEAKER_01]: I wasn't expecting any apologies.

[00:37:26] [SPEAKER_01]: I thought she was, you know,

[00:37:27] [SPEAKER_01]: the mom had her claws into her and that was it.

[00:37:30] [SPEAKER_01]: But I'm glad she's made changes

[00:37:31] [SPEAKER_01]: because the alternative is she continued down that path

[00:37:34] [SPEAKER_01]: and you know, it's just shitty behavior.

[00:37:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I think it just showed that Erin being the golden child

[00:37:40] [SPEAKER_01]: affected all her other siblings

[00:37:41] [SPEAKER_01]: but it also affected her in the end

[00:37:44] [SPEAKER_01]: and I'm not making excuses for the behavior

[00:37:45] [SPEAKER_01]: or anything like that but that scene that OP painted

[00:37:49] [SPEAKER_01]: where George came home and saw Erin

[00:37:53] [SPEAKER_01]: just looking at her phone.

[00:37:54] [SPEAKER_01]: That was just there ringing in her mom

[00:37:56] [SPEAKER_01]: and she just didn't want to answer it.

[00:37:58] [SPEAKER_01]: It just said it all for me really.

[00:38:00] [SPEAKER_01]: It was just a small piece of what the other siblings

[00:38:03] [SPEAKER_01]: have faced all these years

[00:38:04] [SPEAKER_01]: and there was a lot of amazing people in this story.

[00:38:07] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm really happy for George at the same time.

[00:38:09] [SPEAKER_01]: He sounds like a good guy.

[00:38:11] [SPEAKER_01]: OP is an amazing person

[00:38:12] [SPEAKER_01]: and congratulations by the way.

[00:38:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Congratulations to Lydia too

[00:38:16] [SPEAKER_01]: and now all your family members

[00:38:18] [SPEAKER_01]: for what they've been through

[00:38:19] [SPEAKER_01]: and sharing your story the way you did.

[00:38:21] [SPEAKER_01]: God, I was invested.

[00:38:23] [SPEAKER_01]: But once again, I'm super glad that Erin is genuine in this

[00:38:26] [SPEAKER_01]: and I hope her redemption arc continues

[00:38:29] [SPEAKER_01]: on the right trajectory

[00:38:31] [SPEAKER_01]: but now I'm gonna turn this one to you guys.

[00:38:33] [SPEAKER_01]: What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:38:37] [SPEAKER_01]: What a roller coaster of emotions.

[00:38:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below

[00:38:42] [SPEAKER_01]: and just a huge thank you for being here today

[00:38:44] [SPEAKER_01]: for getting involved in the stories

[00:38:45] [SPEAKER_01]: for showing your love not just towards me

[00:38:47] [SPEAKER_01]: but towards each other

[00:38:48] [SPEAKER_01]: and towards the OP's and these stories as well.

[00:38:51] [SPEAKER_01]: It means the absolute world.

[00:38:52] [SPEAKER_01]: So thank you so, so much

[00:38:54] [SPEAKER_01]: and hopefully I see you in the next one.

[00:38:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Take care and much love.