My HOA Tried To Tow My Car TWICE In One Day r/Relationshions HOA Stories

[00:00:03] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well, my name is Mark and today we're checking out

[00:00:08] some more Reddit Stories and if you do love a Reddit Story why not consider hitting that

[00:00:12] like subscribe maybe that notification bell too and let's crack on with today's first

[00:00:18] story.

[00:00:20] Now today's first story is an HOA story with an update 3 years later.

[00:00:25] It's from DesertNurse760 and says HOA tried to tow my legally permitted vehicle twice in

[00:00:33] one day.

[00:00:34] I paid cash for a 2 bedroom condo in April.

[00:00:38] The condo came with two parking permits, one red and one green.

[00:00:42] The updated rules that were sent to me after closing states that an owner gets two parking

[00:00:47] permits, one for covered parking and one for uncovered parking.

[00:00:51] However, the rules do not state which permit is for which parking.

[00:00:56] Walking around the neighborhood revealed both green and red permits under covered parking

[00:01:00] as well as about half of the vehicle showing no permit at all.

[00:01:04] One week ago I received a notice on my windshield that my car would be towed for not showing

[00:01:08] the proper permit even though the permit was clearly visible in the corner of the passenger

[00:01:12] side windshield.

[00:01:13] In fact, the notice was placed under the passenger wiper blade directly above the permit.

[00:01:19] I called the management company and informed them of their mistake along with a picture

[00:01:23] of the permit in the corner of the windshield.

[00:01:26] I thought that this would solve the problem.

[00:01:28] I was wrong.

[00:01:29] I am a nurse and I work night shift.

[00:01:32] About 1 o'clock my wife came in screaming that one of our cars was being towed.

[00:01:37] I immediately got up, got dressed and went outside to find an employee of the management

[00:01:41] company directing a tow truck to tow my car.

[00:01:44] She said that it was being towed because it had the wrong color permit.

[00:01:48] I immediately pulled up the rules and regulations on my phone and asked her to show me where

[00:01:53] the color codes were explained.

[00:01:55] She couldn't do that because that explanation doesn't exist in the rules.

[00:01:58] But she refused to stop the towing company so I had no choice but to call the police.

[00:02:03] Upon arrival I explained to the officers what was happening and showed them the rules and

[00:02:07] regulations on my phone and both of my cars were the proper permits.

[00:02:11] I told the management employee and the tow company that they had no reason to tow my

[00:02:15] car.

[00:02:16] The rep hemmed and hawed that I was parked wrong even if the rules didn't state so.

[00:02:21] The cop ordered the tow company to release my car.

[00:02:25] Problem solved right?

[00:02:26] Wrong.

[00:02:27] I go back to bed and just fall asleep when my wife comes in screaming that they're

[00:02:31] towing the car again.

[00:02:32] I go back outside and the same cop is there from earlier.

[00:02:36] This time the president of the management company, the one who oversees HOA board meetings

[00:02:41] is there along with the same tow truck driver and employee from before.

[00:02:45] This time my car is already up on the flatbed.

[00:02:48] The manager told police I still had the wrong permit to use covered parking, even though

[00:02:52] it was the right one according to this unwritten rule that I had learned of earlier in the day.

[00:02:58] The cop asked the manager if she had inspected the permit before calling for the car to

[00:03:01] be towed.

[00:03:02] She admitted that she hadn't and was just going off what the employee had told her from

[00:03:06] earlier.

[00:03:07] The cop asked her to verify that the permit was the right color to be under covered parking

[00:03:12] and she hesitatingly admitted that it was.

[00:03:14] The cop was visibly perturbed and again ordered the tow truck to release the vehicle.

[00:03:19] He then gave a stern talking to the manager about making false claims and not verifying

[00:03:23] for herself what her employee told her.

[00:03:26] The cop gave me a case number and said that both reports will be available in 24 hours.

[00:03:30] I plan to use those reports to bring the attention of the HOA board as I know for certain that

[00:03:36] the manager will try to sweep this under the rug or will refuse to even acknowledge this

[00:03:40] incident.

[00:03:41] What should my next step be?

[00:03:57] I always get emails after these stories people telling me I live in a good HOA etc etc.

[00:04:02] I get that but the stories whenever I read them they always come across as super power

[00:04:06] trippy like your bins been left out for one day and you're getting a fine for it, your

[00:04:12] grass length is too long.

[00:04:13] I always imagine him going along with a ruler measuring the grass length.

[00:04:16] Nope that's not acceptable.

[00:04:18] 100 pound fine.

[00:04:19] Like a whole group of them walking down the middle of the street with a clipboard just

[00:04:22] marking everyone down fining everyone.

[00:04:25] I understand rules are there in place for a reason etc but why can't they just like

[00:04:30] go knock on the door and say just let you know could you please do this.

[00:04:35] Would you be able to just bring your bin in?

[00:04:37] Or whatever it is, just a friendly conversation surely these are your neighbours at the same

[00:04:41] time as well.

[00:04:42] You want to have a good relationship with these people around you and not be some arsehole

[00:04:46] who's fining them every 2 seconds.

[00:04:47] I just find the power dynamics in these ones really weird.

[00:04:51] But Diresta says Notifying the HOA board in writing about these attempts to illegally

[00:04:56] tow your vehicle is the first step.

[00:04:59] Looks like you're already preparing for that.

[00:05:01] Rest depends on your state laws, you might even be able to file a small claim.

[00:05:05] But if I were you I wouldn't do it yet even if your state laws allow this.

[00:05:10] Typically a towing authorization should be given in writing, after a copy of this authorization

[00:05:14] from the management company.

[00:05:15] Make sure to let them know you're prepared to sue them if this happens again.

[00:05:19] If you're prepared to do that.

[00:05:21] I'm not a lawyer, just my opinion and how I'd address this if I were in your position.

[00:05:26] And I just realized my comment about knocking on your door might not be relevant in this

[00:05:30] situation because if it's a management company they don't care.

[00:05:35] Does every HOA have a management company?

[00:05:37] I swear we've read stories in the past where it's just ran by neighbours.

[00:05:41] Opie responded to that comment and said the officer notified dispatch that my car was

[00:05:45] not to be towed.

[00:05:47] Apparently the tow company notifies the cops when they're going to tow a vehicle and

[00:05:50] they presumably give the license number to dispatch.

[00:05:53] So my local PD isn't going to play this stupid game again with a management slash tow

[00:05:58] company.

[00:05:59] Whitey dude says I'd be out for blood so to speak.

[00:06:03] I'd really really press the board to fire this manager.

[00:06:06] The first attempted tow can be forgiven, the second not so much.

[00:06:10] At this point she knew you were a resident, had appropriate tags and was just confused

[00:06:14] by the lack of system.

[00:06:16] Second attempted tow was malicious and an abuse of power.

[00:06:20] Desk pilot says I would take time stamped photos of the permit clearly affixed, send

[00:06:24] the letter to the towing company and the board certified mail return receipt with a copy

[00:06:28] of the CCRs and then if the car disappears report it stolen.

[00:06:33] At this point you can demonstrate intentional harassment.

[00:06:36] Opie says I already took the pictures and am preparing the letter as we speak.

[00:06:40] I think I can already show intentional harassment as my car was the only one targeted even though

[00:06:45] there were other cars, literally two spaces away from mine who had no parking permits

[00:06:50] visible.

[00:06:51] But Opie came in with her update and says as of today here is what happened.

[00:06:56] This is like 3 years later and says I've worked tirelessly these last 2 years to explain

[00:07:01] to as many homeowners what went on between me and the HOA.

[00:07:05] Most of them knew the basic details because they were aired during the monthly HOA meeting.

[00:07:10] Many HOA members sided with me, a few didn't and a good chunk of them couldn't care less

[00:07:15] because it didn't affect them personally.

[00:07:18] That all changed last year with the onslaught of Hurricane Hillary.

[00:07:22] The storm did considerable damage to many of the roofs in the complex.

[00:07:26] The HOA board, led by the incompetent management company dragged their feet when it came to

[00:07:31] performing the needed repairs.

[00:07:33] This really opened the eyes of many homeowners to the absolute incompetence of the board.

[00:07:38] Some homeowners stepped up and volunteered to run for the board and in February of this

[00:07:42] year the entire board was replaced in a landslide election.

[00:07:46] Their first item of business was to fire the management company that was responsible for

[00:07:50] trying to tow my cars and was responsible for running up a $10,000 legal bill in the

[00:07:55] process.

[00:07:56] As for the parking permits, the new board has rescinded to the previous parking rules

[00:08:01] and now there is no segregated parking.

[00:08:04] One pass for covered or uncovered parking.

[00:08:07] I guess I'm about as happy now as one could be living in an HOA.

[00:08:11] The new board is filled with sane adults with no vendettas and seem to be taking their responsibilities

[00:08:16] seriously instead of targeting homeowners with malicious BS.

[00:08:21] Some people on the back of this one suggesting that the current board should chase up the

[00:08:25] old management company for money back basically.

[00:08:28] I don't know about the legalities of this one but it seems to have been solved so far.

[00:08:34] I'm not sure about the current board but it seems to have been solved so far.

[00:08:37] When OP mentioned Hurricane Hillary, I hadn't heard of that hurricane before.

[00:08:41] They seem to give them all names these days don't they so I get confused which is which.

[00:08:45] I thought to myself bloody hell who's Hurricane Hillary?

[00:08:47] But anyway, now I'm going to turn this one to you guys.

[00:08:51] What do you guys make of this situation?

[00:08:53] Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below and let's move on to another story.

[00:09:00] Am I the Arsehole?

[00:09:01] Our next story comes from the Am I the Arsehole subreddit does have an update from beginning

[00:09:05] date 1924.

[00:09:07] She says Am I the Arsehole for rejecting the worst name ever for our offspring?

[00:09:14] So my husband 38 male and I 36 female are expecting our first child, a bouncing baby

[00:09:21] girl due in a few months.

[00:09:23] We were both over the moon when we found out the gender but now things have gotten complicated

[00:09:29] to say the least.

[00:09:31] See when we first started talking about names, the boy name was immediately decided Stuart

[00:09:37] Jr after my husband.

[00:09:39] No problem there, it's a classic name and carries family meaning but for a girl things

[00:09:45] got murky.

[00:09:46] My husband suggested Stuata.

[00:09:51] My husband suggested Stuata.

[00:09:53] No you're not having a stroke.

[00:09:56] Basically his logic is that since Stuart ends in T we can just add an A to make it

[00:10:02] feminine.

[00:10:03] I tried explaining why that doesn't work, how it sounds more like a furniture brand than

[00:10:08] a human name, how she'd be endlessly correcting people and explaining its origin.

[00:10:14] He's adamant though, says it honors him while giving our daughter a unique name.

[00:10:20] I've suggested alternatives, feminine names that maybe share a similar sound or meaning

[00:10:25] to Stuart, names he mentioned liking in the past, even just going back to the drawing

[00:10:29] board entirely but he's fixed on Stuata.

[00:10:33] Now I love my husband dearly and I understand wanting to honor family but I can't imagine

[00:10:38] subjecting our daughter to a lifetime of awkward stares and endless questions about her unusual

[00:10:43] name.

[00:10:44] I also worry about potential bullying and the impact it could have on her self-esteem.

[00:10:48] So Reddit, I'm either jerk for refusing to budge on Stuata.

[00:10:54] Is there any compromise I haven't considered?

[00:10:56] Help a soon to be mama out.

[00:10:59] Looking forward to your thoughts and hopefully some sanity checks.

[00:11:03] Edit, please no suggestions for other T names.

[00:11:07] The man clearly has a theme and I need to gently steer him away from it, not fuel the

[00:11:11] fire.

[00:11:26] Polly the pony says, not the arsehole.

[00:11:50] Naming a child as a 2 yes and 1 no situation means you need 2 times yes for a name to be

[00:11:55] it and 1 no to make sure that name is not the name you choose.

[00:11:59] Works both ways if you'd ask me.

[00:12:01] Of course I'm not a fan of naming the first name of a child after a parent because then

[00:12:05] the child will always be compared to their parents and need to fight harder to be their

[00:12:09] own person.

[00:12:10] I have less problems with a middle name being connected to someone else, parents, grandparents

[00:12:16] because that is only a formal name and not used in everyday business.

[00:12:20] Why is he dead set on Stuata?

[00:12:22] I mean there are so many beautiful names but he only wants to name his daughter after him,

[00:12:27] why not after the mother like your name junior?

[00:12:30] It's a bit misogynistic to only want to name the baby after the father.

[00:12:34] Whose last name will the baby get?

[00:12:37] His as well?

[00:12:38] Maybe you could find a way like name the baby with the first letter as your husband, Stella,

[00:12:43] Sally, son etc.

[00:12:46] Make sure the baby has a middle name if she shares the same last name as her father because

[00:12:50] it would be annoying for simple things like mail and stuff.

[00:12:54] Shell says to piggyback on this, what's his middle name?

[00:12:57] Could there be a feminine version of that less objectionable slash actually a name rather

[00:13:02] than just a weird mishmash of sounds?

[00:13:05] Princess Ferocious says not the arsehole telling me he only gets one kid named after him so

[00:13:09] if he goes with Stuarta now he'd never get a Stuart Junior and how come it's so important

[00:13:14] that he be honoured but not you?

[00:13:16] See how he feels about naming a future son a male version of your name.

[00:13:20] Remind him that baby names need a yes from both parents or it's a no.

[00:13:24] You both need to be able to live with whatever you go with even if that means both of you

[00:13:28] missing out on the one you want most.

[00:13:31] And Tempting Penguin says not the arsehole, Stuarta sounds like a pharmaceutical product.

[00:13:35] I can hear the commercials now.

[00:13:37] In some cases, Stuarta can cause headaches, rashes and even death.

[00:13:41] It doesn't have a decent nickname.

[00:13:42] Even though adding an A doesn't make it feminine in all cases, then this is one of them.

[00:13:47] I'd go for Stuart as a middle name.

[00:13:50] I find it so bizarre the insistence on this name.

[00:13:55] Not even considering how the child will feel growing up.

[00:13:58] They're not an object or a pet or anything.

[00:14:00] They gotta grow up with this name.

[00:14:01] They gotta live with this name.

[00:14:03] The child is the one that has to live with this name and to not take that into consideration

[00:14:07] at all is just bizarre to me.

[00:14:09] But OP comes in with an update and says first the good news.

[00:14:12] We have a beautiful, healthy baby girl.

[00:14:15] She weighed in at 7lbs 4oz and already has the most incredible head of dark hair.

[00:14:20] Seriously, where did that come from?

[00:14:23] Labor was a marathon, not a sprint.

[00:14:25] 18 hours of... fun.

[00:14:28] But the amazing nurses kept me fueled on ice chips and cheesy encouragement.

[00:14:33] Now for the not so good news.

[00:14:35] The name situation.

[00:14:36] Oh no, buckle up because this might take a minute.

[00:14:40] Right before pushing started, things got a little heated between me and Stuart.

[00:14:45] Apparently the stress of contractions made him even more attached to Stewarder.

[00:14:49] He was pacing the room muttering about family legacy while I was doing some very impressive

[00:14:55] Lamaze breathing exercises.

[00:14:58] Suddenly my water broke with a rather impressive pop.

[00:15:01] Let's just say it startled everyone in the room, including Stuart.

[00:15:05] The nurse, bless her heart, took advantage of the distraction and very calmly started

[00:15:10] prepping for delivery.

[00:15:12] Everything after that was a blur of pushing, encouraging words and the most amazing head

[00:15:16] of dark hair emerging into the world.

[00:15:19] The second our daughter was out, screaming her little lungs out, a wave of pure primal

[00:15:24] love washed over me.

[00:15:25] It was in that moment, staring at this tiny, perfect human being, that the name debate

[00:15:31] completely evaporated.

[00:15:33] There was no way I could call this beautiful little girl, Stewarder.

[00:15:37] So what did we end up with?

[00:15:39] In the haze of postpartum bliss, I blurted out the first name that popped into my head.

[00:15:44] The name of the incredible nurse who coached me through labor.

[00:15:47] Ella.

[00:15:48] Yes, Ella.

[00:15:49] Not exactly the most adventurous choice, but in that moment it felt perfect.

[00:15:54] Strong.

[00:15:55] Steady.

[00:15:56] Kind.

[00:15:57] Just like the woman who helped bring our daughter into the world.

[00:16:00] Stewart, bless his confused heart, just looked at me, then at our daughter, then back at

[00:16:05] me again.

[00:16:06] Finally, he let out a shaky laugh and said, Ella it is.

[00:16:10] Thanks for all the support and hilarious Stewarder comparisons.

[00:16:13] Here's to sleepless nights, endless diaper changes and the incredible journey of parenthood.

[00:16:19] A couple of comments after that one, so Exciting Cattle says, I'm so happy you guys could

[00:16:24] agree on a name.

[00:16:26] Ella is a really good and classic name.

[00:16:28] Hell wishes to you and your baby.

[00:16:31] Fated Breath replies, I like Ella too, but I'm surprised OP's husband didn't counter

[00:16:36] with Stewartella.

[00:16:39] Jewels Lot replies, then he'd be a Nutella.

[00:16:44] Professional Ruin says, A sensible counter would be Stella, but the paperwork is done.

[00:16:50] Too late.

[00:16:51] And I'm glad that it came to a compromise and Ella was chosen and they move on.

[00:16:56] But was anyone else weirded out when it got to the bit where it says he was pacing the

[00:17:02] room muttering about family legacy.

[00:17:05] I mean, what the fuck?

[00:17:07] I'm really curious to know what this legacy is that he's muttering about it.

[00:17:10] I want to know what the exact words were.

[00:17:13] But holy moly, what do you guys make of this situation?

[00:17:17] Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below and let's have one more story.

[00:17:22] Now this one is from the Am I the Arsehole subreddit.

[00:17:26] It doesn't have an update as yet, but I saw neighbor in the title and I was like, you

[00:17:29] know me.

[00:17:30] It's from Throwawayflatissues who says, Am I the arsehole for refusing to help rekindle

[00:17:36] my girlfriend's friendship with our neighbor after she refused to help her in an emergency?

[00:17:41] My 25 female girlfriend, 26 female, Lotta has always been on the more quiet and reserved

[00:17:47] side, but also incredibly kind and conscientious of other people.

[00:17:52] She also doesn't let others walk over her and knows how to set and stick to boundaries,

[00:17:58] which is one of the reasons I was attracted to her.

[00:18:00] But a few weeks ago, I think she was too ruthless.

[00:18:03] A few weeks ago, our upstairs neighbor, who Lotta and I are close with, showed up at our

[00:18:09] door sobbing and begging Lotta to babysit her five-year-old for an hour because her

[00:18:13] one-month-old was having trouble breathing and had stopped breathing at one point and

[00:18:17] needed to go to the hospital ASAP.

[00:18:20] The neighbor explained her mother was on the way as they speak, but she has no one

[00:18:24] else to take care of her other son.

[00:18:26] She offered to pay Lotta.

[00:18:27] I was at work at the time.

[00:18:30] Lotta said no.

[00:18:31] She said she was busy and couldn't do it.

[00:18:34] The neighbor ended up taking both kids to the hospital.

[00:18:36] I found out about this incident when I got home from work and Lotta told me.

[00:18:40] I was genuinely surprised to hear she said no, which seemed to annoy Lotta.

[00:18:45] It's been three weeks since that event and our neighbor has been quite cold to Lotta

[00:18:50] and this really bothers her.

[00:18:52] She says she was just setting boundaries and that our neighbor was entitled and snobby

[00:18:55] for being upset that Lotta said no.

[00:18:58] I explained I felt differently and am more on our neighbor's side as 1.

[00:19:02] She's never asked us for any favors in the three years we've known her, and 2.

[00:19:06] This was a medical emergency, not her wanting to go clubbing with her friends.

[00:19:11] I told Lotta that she didn't teach our neighbor a lesson.

[00:19:14] She only added stress she didn't need.

[00:19:17] This really upset Lotta because she thought I would be on her side.

[00:19:21] She then asked me to talk to our neighbor to try and rekindle their friendship.

[00:19:24] I said I can't do that for her.

[00:19:27] She needs to apologize herself and put in the work.

[00:19:30] Lotta stormed off and now keeps saying I'm being a huge asshole for not siding with her

[00:19:35] and helping her with our neighbor who is a friend.

[00:19:38] Am I the asshole?

[00:19:40] Edit, Lotta was busy cooking dinner and catching up on a show of hers.

[00:19:44] She wasn't working or doing anything that would be dangerous for kids to be around.

[00:19:49] Nah, not the asshole for trying to rekindle that relationship.

[00:19:52] As you said, she needs to go talk to her and try and build whatever she can out of this

[00:19:57] so I wouldn't expect too much there if I was you.

[00:20:00] This sounds like a good neighbor who hasn't asked for any favors in 3 years, even a friend

[00:20:05] you said in this post.

[00:20:06] And that's how she treats her friends.

[00:20:09] A medical emergency.

[00:20:11] She came up to you and told you that a child was having trouble breathing and can you just

[00:20:15] look after the child for an hour while her mom turns up.

[00:20:17] I mean come on now and you turned her away.

[00:20:20] That's mad.

[00:20:21] But Lynn says not the asshole and then quotes that it was a medical emergency and says,

[00:20:26] that's it right there.

[00:20:27] This is so horrible to do to someone.

[00:20:30] Because Lotta was busy, that poor 5 year old was exposed to further trauma by having to

[00:20:34] go to the hospital and potentially witness their baby sibling being poked and prodded

[00:20:38] and probably have tubes shoved down their throat.

[00:20:41] I really hope Lotta doesn't want children of her own, or maybe I do, because then she

[00:20:46] will realize what a total asshole she was to this poor woman.

[00:20:49] Now I have to question, what does this mean for OP's relationship?

[00:20:54] Would you consider looking at this in a different way?

[00:20:57] If like hypothetical situation my partner treated a neighbor that way, someone they considered

[00:21:02] a friend and treated them like that, I would certainly be side eyeing things after that.

[00:21:07] B Jackson says not the asshole, good for you for recognizing that it wasn't your job to

[00:21:11] mend the fences that Lotta broke.

[00:21:13] She might be good and kind in most instances, but in this case she doesn't know how to admit

[00:21:18] that she was wrong and apologized to the right person.

[00:21:21] Sounds like she's mad at everyone but herself.

[00:21:23] I'm also on the neighbor's side, this was a small test of friendship for Lotta and she

[00:21:27] failed it.

[00:21:28] She didn't want to be inconvenienced, which is fine, but now your neighbor doesn't want

[00:21:33] to be inconvenienced by befriending Lotta.

[00:21:36] Now I'm going to turn this one to you guys, maybe you got a different opinion on the matter.

[00:21:41] If you was Lotta would you ever be able to become friends with someone like that again?

[00:21:45] That's mad.

[00:21:46] Let me know your thoughts down in the comments below.

[00:21:50] Just a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart for getting involved in today's stories.

[00:21:53] Your love, your support, your time always means the absolute world to me so thank you

[00:21:58] so much for being involved and hopefully I will see you in the next one.

[00:22:02] Take care and much love.