My Boyfriend Is Better Than Me At EVERYTHING - Including My Own Passion r/BestOf

[00:00:01] [SPEAKER_01] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit Stories. And if you do love a Reddit Story, why not consider hitting that like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now today's first story comes from He's Better 21 and says, My boyfriend, 20 male, is better than me at everything. 20 female. And it's making me upset.

[00:00:29] [SPEAKER_01] My boyfriend and I have been dating for four years. Since we go to different colleges, we've been long distance for the past two and a half years. And we get on weekly Skype calls, some text messages and occasional visits in the summers and such. He's always been smarter than me. He was valedictorian in high school and I was number five in my class. He goes to a very, very good school, whereas mine is good, but not nearly as great. His major is extremely demanding, mine not so much.

[00:00:58] [SPEAKER_01] He also has lots of friends. He's not popular, but he has plenty of nerdy friends, whereas I'm more of a loner. Whatever, that's all fine. I'm used to it. So I really like to write and read. Those are probably my main hobbies and it's definitely my passion, writing fiction.

[00:01:15] [SPEAKER_01] A month ago, my boyfriend said he wanted to try writing a novel. Sure. Okay. I was a bit skeptical because he considers himself a non-reader and that fiction isn't worth reading. Yet he wanted to write fiction. Okay. He sent me the first few chapters of his novel yesterday. I cried. They're so much better than anything I've ever written. And I've been writing for years. He's so meh about the literary process, but it comes to him so easily.

[00:01:42] [SPEAKER_01] He's a math slash physics major, but here he is being Douglas Adams. It's a sci-fi story he's writing. I don't write sci-fi, so correct me if I'm wrong. I'm just so jealous right now. He's always encouraged me to write, but at the same time, he's never really respected my course of study and always told me I should have been a math major. I'm hopeless at math or something.

[00:02:05] [SPEAKER_01] He's not a bad guy. He's my boyfriend and all, but how do I let go of this jealousy? Oh, and to top it all off, he's better looking than me and we both know it. A commenter says to OP, holy insecurity, Batman. Girl, you need counseling. This type of inferiority complex is super unhealthy. I'm sure your school can hook you up. I guarantee you 99% of this is just in your head.

[00:02:31] [SPEAKER_01] OP says I'm honestly not as insecure as I sound and I'm good at some stuff. He's just better at all of it. Most of the time, I'm happy to have a really smart, capable boyfriend, but I wish I could be as smart and capable too. It just hurts that he's even better at my one true passion. And he thinks of it as a silly little hobby that he can try. Concerned son says there will always be people in the world who are much, much better at something and you are, or even at everything.

[00:02:58] [SPEAKER_01] Your boyfriend just happens to be one of these people. So what? Would you prefer to be in a relationship with a person who is less smart than you? What for? To feel superior over him. Think about it. I'm also much better at almost anything when compared to my girlfriend. I learn anything much faster. She's been snowboarding for three years and after just five days of practice, I am the same level as her.

[00:03:21] [SPEAKER_01] But that doesn't make me love her less. It's irrelevant. I love her because of her personality, not because of how fast she learns. She is successful in life, by the way. It takes longer time for her to learn something, but she's a very hard worker, which helps her overcome more talented, but less hardworking colleagues. She's not upset when I do something better than her. Instead, she's proud of me, as you would be for your boyfriend if you weren't so insecure.

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_01] Opie says, I'm usually really proud of my boyfriend for all of his accomplishments. What bothers me about this time is that he thinks it's also trivial. I hate that writing isn't even something he likes to do, but he decided one day to try it and lo and behold, he's a genius. I would love it if he actually saw it as a discipline to study and get into. I don't know if that makes any sense.

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_01] I guess I'm okay at life. I'm not successful like he is, but I do okay. It just feels like he doesn't respect me sometimes, but that might be in my head. Someone says, why not just talk to the boyfriend? Opie says, well, I do talk to him, but that particular part is rude and irrational. Telling him would only hurt his feelings. I have to get over that myself and not let it affect the relationship. Until now, it hasn't. And everyone was pointing out the insecurity in this post and how it's only going to beat you down.

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_01] And if you're in a loving relationship, why does it really matter? I do get it. It must be brutal, right? Especially considering, you know, he's casually dismissed fiction as not worth reading before. And then turns around and asks her to celebrate his first attempt at writing it. Then he said to her that she should have done maths like he's never respected her degree. I hope he did come in with an update and says, thanks everyone for all your advice. I definitely read every comment and had a lot to think about.

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_01] Something that stood out to me was someone asking me straight up if we loved each other. Honestly, I'm not sure. I told him I loved him at the end of our first year together. He said he wasn't ready to say that. And I just sort of left things alone after that. I sort of forgot about it after a while. And here we are four years later, having never said I love you to each other. It sort of left me in a weird place now that I thought about it. I sent him a Facebook message asking for his thoughts on the matter.

[00:05:33] [SPEAKER_01] He asked if it really mattered if we said that sort of stuff to each other. I didn't really know, but I was still curious, so I pressed it. He said he wasn't sure. Frankly, I'm not sure either. Since we haven't really had a romantic moment since junior prom and we've been long distance for so long, I broke up with him. And he said, okay, good luck. I felt that pang of loss, so I guess I do or did love him, but he didn't really seem to care. So now I'm alone.

[00:06:01] [SPEAKER_01] I've always been a loner, but now I'm totally, completely alone. I don't make friends. I don't think I've had a real friend since maybe middle school. I know it doesn't matter all that much in the long run, since not a lot of adults have friends and college is a bubble and all that. Ah well, I'm hurting now. Let's see how single life goes. Any advice on moving on with my life? Not making friends and joining clubs and stuff. That's not really my thing. Comaner says to AP, good on you. Personally, I think you did the right thing.

[00:06:31] [SPEAKER_01] Do you have anyone, friends or family you can reach out to? Even if they are people you may not have contacted in a while. If you know they are good people, you can always reach out and say you realize you've been neglecting friendships. Just ask how they are. What have they been up to, etc. Don't feel pressure to go and meet people or make friends until you're ready. Maybe just spend some time on your own. Do stuff that you really enjoy or find out what else you might enjoy. Go out and have a coffee and a cake at a nice cafe or something. Pamper yourself a little.

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_01] Wander about town and go see some exhibits or shops, etc. OP says, no friends. Have family but they live pretty far away. I'll be sure to spend quality time with them come Thanksgiving. I did some baking to clear my mind. Funny, my boyfriend isn't a good baker. I guess that's something I'd do better than he does. The commander says, start doing things that you're into and that bring you joy. The only thing I can tell you honestly is time heals all wounds but it will leave scars. The scars will serve as memories. Best of luck.

[00:07:29] [SPEAKER_01] And if you ever need to just talk or vent, just hit me up. Maybe he says, yep, I did some baking and listened to some music for a while. Boyfriend always hated when I played music without headphones. He doesn't listen to music at all. So I did just that. But now I'm going to turn this one to you guys. What do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And let's move on to another story.

[00:07:56] [SPEAKER_01] Now our next story is coming from our very own subreddit r slash mark narrations. The story with multiple updates with a new update as well. A couple of trigger warnings in this. It mentions gun violence, shooting and death and loss within the story. So if you do want to skip the story, please feel free to do so. Tim stamps are always down in the description along the timeline below. Thank you. It's from Tasty Programmer 504.

[00:08:22] [SPEAKER_01] And it says, my mother lied about getting shot and proceeded to blame me. Should I unblock my mother when she lied about getting shot? My grandma and great aunt want me to. Let me start by saying that my mother, 56, has been manipulative and yelling at me for as long as I can remember. She definitely has some mental health issues, but that doesn't excuse her behavior. Especially since she promised she'd get better.

[00:08:48] [SPEAKER_01] It started on a Thursday, about an hour after I came out of therapy. I wasn't feeling great. I'm just starting college and have been going through hell trying to figure out finances, studying, clubs and medication all on my own. My parents promised to help, but haven't. I was already emotional because therapy that day was about how my mother affected my life. Then I got a text from her asking, Did I tell you about a crazed gunman from Florida chasing me on the highway?

[00:09:17] [SPEAKER_01] I, 18 male, thought she was joking. So I replied, Nope, but sounds about right. And didn't think much of it because I had to get ready for work. At 1254, about an hour before my shift, she texted again. He shot at me and shattered the passenger window of the Miata. I floored it through a red light and onto the highway. Then I felt a sharp pain above my bicep and realized I was bleeding. I went to the police, they called an ambulance and the ER removed a .22 slug and glass from my shoulder.

[00:09:47] [SPEAKER_01] I didn't even think about how .22 isn't a slug. I just panicked. My first reaction was to cope with humor. So I text, Sick. Great story to tell and or how about don't get shot? But when she didn't respond right away, I started sending messages fast, asking if she was okay, if it broke any bones and finally, I love you. She finally replied, still acting like it really happened.

[00:10:13] [SPEAKER_01] We text back and forth about it and I wondered why my other mother didn't tell me anything. I text her too, but even though she was reading the messages, she didn't respond. All this went on for about an hour and I was a mess. I told my boss I couldn't come in because my mom had been shot and when they said I could leave, I sat on a bench and cried. And at about 2.08pm, 8 minutes after my shift would have started, She text, I embellished the story son,

[00:10:41] [SPEAKER_01] because I couldn't believe you didn't ask me about being chased down by a man in a big truck with a gun. I was stunned. I asked, why should you let me call out of work and break down over something that wasn't real? She replied, was that after you called Raymond? We've been on the phone with Christina. Honestly, I was just being a smartass because I couldn't believe you didn't ask. Not my fault you called out of work. Why didn't you call me before your friend if you were that concerned? For the record, I never called Raymond.

[00:11:11] [SPEAKER_01] I just texted him because I was panicking and didn't know what to do. I told her that and she still tried to make it my fault. I was furious and heartbroken. She knew what I'd been going through and she still did this to me. I asked her why over and over until she finally said, Most people would have called their mum, not a friend. I replied most mothers wouldn't lie to their son about being shot. And then I blocked her. A few minutes later, my other mother texts me.

[00:11:39] [SPEAKER_01] She was being a smartass because she was in a traumatic event and you didn't act like you cared. It was scary for her. It was dark humour. You didn't pay attention. Your response was sick. Great story to tell. This is blown way out of proportion. I blocked her too. Later I found out from my aunt that Mother 1 told Mother 2 she was going to play this prank on me. After that, I was drained. But I knew if I didn't reach out to my family, they'd twist the story.

[00:12:07] [SPEAKER_01] I spent the rest of the day sending screenshots and explaining what happened. Everyone, including my aunt and my roommate, sided with me. My aunt even told me that Mother 1 tried to convince her this was somehow my fault. The only thing they still pay for is my phone line and I'm already planning for when they cut that off. I don't want to sound ungrateful. They did raise me but this went too far. You didn't fake something like that just to prove a point. I missed two days of work over it.

[00:12:34] [SPEAKER_01] Lost about $100 and honestly, I'm still hurt. They're my parents and that makes it worse. But I feel calmer and more at peace now that I don't talk to them. So am I the arsehole here for not responding the way my mother wanted me to? Am I the arsehole for blocking my parents? The first commenter on this one, Coco Almond Rock, says, Nope, not even close. Prioritize peace in your life. Keep them blocked. Move on. If your other relatives won't let it go, let them know they too can be blocked.

[00:13:05] [SPEAKER_01] Daydreamer says, Boy who cried wolf. Now you're less likely to take any of them seriously. I'm so sorry that you injured panic over a prank and missed work. Opie says, You're right because later one of family's friends tried to get me to unblock her because she had something in her eyes that could make her go blind. And when I verified with my aunt, my aunt told me that it wasn't that serious so I'm glad I verified. It's okay. I've been pulling double shifts to make it up because technically I missed two days worth of work. I got super sick the day after.

[00:13:35] [SPEAKER_01] Tired says to Opie, You are not the arsehole. You're dealing with someone who displays narcissistic traits. You aren't wrong for wanting to cut them out. I grew up with the same type of stuff. I always felt guilty and shame. Never felt like I mattered. The best thing I can suggest is to continue seeing your therapist. How to address this going forward with the therapist and making an action plan and following through. The two mothers you have were working together. This is sick and wrong on both their parts. Keep them on an information diet.

[00:14:04] [SPEAKER_01] They need to go to therapy. But I'm a mere internet stranger. Know that you are seen, heard and most of all loved. You're doing your best and that is good enough. Take care of yourself. So Opie came in with her first update and said, here's an update since the last post of what's happened. And as I'm typing this, I'm on a one hour and 30 minutes of sleep because I had to put an all-nighter to do schoolwork, then go to work. My mother, the one who lied. My other mother, the one who didn't lie.

[00:14:33] [SPEAKER_01] My mother recently sent me a pretty threatening email that said, you don't know how close I am to my family as well as you think you do. After that, she tried to guilt trip me about the $200 she had transferred into my bank account. $100 was for my birthday and the other $100 was to cover the work she had caused me to miss. A couple of days later, she tried to love Bob me on Instagram saying she had made a mistake and that she loved me with all her heart. I just wrote back, you never said sorry and still can't take accountability.

[00:15:01] [SPEAKER_01] You're a grown-ass woman and blocked her. Then she lied to our family and said she didn't know I lost any money and claimed she didn't know that I wanted reimbursement from her, which was a lie. I told her I did. My other mother is now divorcing her because she wants me in her life. Even with that, I still don't trust anyone in this family anymore. I told my other mother it's me or her. I was neglected as a little kid because of her side of the family. The other mother, not the one who lied. Anne was tired of hearing how

[00:15:31] [SPEAKER_01] she was a good person in a shitty situation. I finally made her be strong and not scared of what will happen when the divorce is final. Every single person in this family has broken my trust. I feel like except for my cousins. My mother, the one who got shot, called my uncle crying, trying to get sympathy, but he didn't buy it. But she certainly did for my great aunt. I was in the middle of doing a lab report when I got those texts and it was out of nowhere. She just started texting me.

[00:16:00] [SPEAKER_01] Of course, my mother was at her house so technically not out of nowhere. I just didn't think that betrayal was coming though. My great aunt uninvited me to Christmas dinner and told me I needed to get over myself and that I was being selfish, that going to church should have shown me to forgive and that Jesus forgave us and that we all sin. I didn't say anything back. I stayed mature, didn't instigate and just didn't reply. Once my cousins heard about this, they immediately were on my side too. My family,

[00:16:30] [SPEAKER_01] my great aunt and my grandmother and my mother are just trying to keep me in that toxic cycle. I'm through with it. My grandmother was trying to fish for information about what my other mother thought about the divorce and what one of my cousins thought of all this. I told her nothing. I'm just done with it. Our family is split, but it was not my fault. Either way, I'm choosing myself to protect my peace no matter what. Thanksgiving is not going to happen at my house this year and my cousins are astonished that my great aunt would do that to me. Either way,

[00:17:00] [SPEAKER_01] a family friend got shot in the head. My best friend's grandfather passed away. Raymond's and we grew up together, which they took me in kind of like their own grandson. And I love my best friend like my brother. It's ironic. Not as in funny, but because she was such a sweet person and my mother isn't. And unfair how someone who deserves to live was sentenced to the fate that my mother lied about. I finally see the lesson life has taught me at least. And we do have another update in a second, but I cover the comments from the top of this one. Tied Reclusive says,

[00:17:30] [SPEAKER_01] Hi Tasty, your mental health and stability matter most. Keep up with your therapist and don't let your narcissistic mother back into your life. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to feel peace. Anyone who tries to manipulate you, cut them off. I'm glad your mom decided to divorce your toxic mom. You don't need to go to a Thanksgiving with toxic people. You want nothing more than to drown you in their bullshit. Keep your chin up and keep moving in the right direction. I'm an internet stranger, but nonetheless, the best way to deal with toxic types

[00:17:59] [SPEAKER_01] is to live your best life without them in it. I'm rooting for you. Coco comes into the update with their own comment as well, saying, Please believe me, holidays with family aren't a terrible thing. They're peaceful. They're stress-free. You can stay in your jammies and watch holiday specials all day. You can play video games. You can hold a potluck, friendsgiving slash friends Christmas with a heavy emphasis on dessert. You can also invite your cousins and your other mother over. If not for Christmas Day, then for either Christmas Eve or Boxing Day. Heck, if you're done with the drama,

[00:18:29] [SPEAKER_01] they can skip the family thing. And you all can make your own tradition. Seriously, don't let this get you down. Being uninvited from the family celebration can be the most amazing gift your family ever gave you. And please, go no contact with everyone except your other mother and your cousins. You have that choice. You don't have to tolerate toxic liars just because they're family. You truly don't. So, a couple of months later, OP comes back in with another update and said, it's been a couple of months

[00:18:59] [SPEAKER_01] since I've updated this forum about everything. So, here's what's been happening. I had to go home for winter break and it was tense. Me and my mother barely talked, thank God. And one day before she went to go spend Christmas for her family, she walked up all oddly and asked, can I have a hug? And I asked, why? And turned around and walked out the room. Odd interaction. The day before Christmas, my aunt from her side of the family sent me a message saying, I need to suck it up and forgive my mother because nobody is mother of the year

[00:19:28] [SPEAKER_01] and that I'm not son of the year. So, I text my cousins and told them, if any of you reach out to me again because I'm blocking all of you, I will press charges for harassment. Then that started a confrontation with my mother and me. I didn't care because I told her that she was narcissistic and laid it all out. I poured my heart out and when I really get upset, I have a nosebleed. The last words in the argument were, the only reason why I lied is because you acted like you didn't care. After that, I have not spoken to her

[00:19:58] [SPEAKER_01] or a family ever since. I eventually went back to school and there my therapist had wanted me to have a consultation with a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist wanted to test my vitamin levels and turns out, I have a vitamin deficiency for all these years, which brought up past trauma. As my mother had convinced me for years that I was crazy or faking being injured and not feeling good just for the attention, which turns out, it inflames patellar tendonitis really bad. I was wondering why my knee was hurting to the point where I could not walk without a heavy limp.

[00:20:29] [SPEAKER_01] Anyways, my psychiatrist also diagnosed me with PTSD because of the nightmares I still have with reversible depression. After taking supplements, my knee was better. No brain fog, my mood is better and I no longer get sick as much. My parents have separated finances and I met a girl whose personality I really connect with. Maybe things will start looking up. And it does look like things are starting to turn around for OP and I really do hope that they are because you deserve that

[00:20:58] [SPEAKER_01] after everything you've been through in the past. You should be able to turn around and rely on family, not have to put up with this kind of shit that you're doing. A family turning around to you and say nobody is mother of the year. You're not expecting mother of the year. You're just expecting a little love and support, not whatever's happening here. But Angelmaker9 says vitamin D is such an underrated vitamin in my opinion. Medical professionals overlook it a lot of the time because they assume we're all good because everyone spends time in the sun. Unfortunately,

[00:21:28] [SPEAKER_01] with sunscreens blocking most of the rays, a lot of the population are vitamin D deficient. Great to hear you're doing much better since you blocked your mother's side of the family. Manipulation is never the way to build healthy relationships. Good luck with the new girl OP. Absolutely. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And just a huge thank you for being here today, getting involved in the story, your love, your support, your time. It always means the absolute world to me.

[00:21:57] [SPEAKER_01] So thank you so, so much and hopefully I'll see you in the next one. Take care and much love.