Am I Wrong For Not Giving My Siblings A Percentage Of The House Our Mother Lived In | r/BestOf

[00:00:01] [SPEAKER_00] Hey Waffle Gang, I do hope you are well. My name is Mark and today we're checking out some more Reddit stories and if you do love a Reddit story why not consider hitting the like, subscribe, maybe that notification bell too. It would be super cheeky of you by the way. And let's crack on with today's first story. Much love guys. Now today's first story comes from the Am I The Arsehole Here subreddit from MotorAerie1485 and says Am I The Arsehole Here?

[00:00:28] [SPEAKER_00] For Not Giving My Siblings A Percentage Of Our House Our Mother Lived In. I, 35 Female, bought my first house when I was 23 for me and my mum to live in after renting for many years. I paid the 80,000 deposit and my mum helped with the mortgage, paying $300 a week while we lived there together. I did this because I didn't want to live alone or pay rent to someone else, which allowed for I to improve my finances.

[00:00:56] [SPEAKER_00] When I moved out at 27, with my husband and later had 3 kids, my mum started paying $450 a week. I covered the rest of the mortgage, which wasn't much. Now my mum has passed away. And my two sisters, 38 and 40, think they should get a part of the house. I don't agree. They say since I already own another house, I don't need it. And they want to split it three ways and rent it out. I've said no because my husband and I do not want to rent it out.

[00:01:25] [SPEAKER_00] As it hurts me to think of someone else in my mother's house. And I know they couldn't afford the mortgage and their own bills. Because of this, they started arguing. Calling me selfish because they think I already have everything. And they don't. But I have not spent over 200k on that house just to give it to someone else for free. They also believe that since house prices have gone up significantly, that I'm to earn an extra couple of hundred thousand.

[00:01:51] [SPEAKER_00] That I'm to earn an extra couple of hundred thousand. Which I might, but I always pay the property taxes and any maintenance needed. However, I do know my mother spent her money on this house over the years. And are forever grateful she could help me out. So I offered each 5,000, which is all I can spare after having to pay for most of my mother's funeral and headstone. But they believe it's not enough and are continuing to argue with me about this. Have any of you experienced this?

[00:02:20] [SPEAKER_00] Opiats and edit in the same post and says I've read most of your comments. And most of you think I'm not the arsehole, so thank you. Sorry, I couldn't reply to everyone. But there was just too many. Especially with the kids keeping me busy. A little update too. Again, in the same post. My middle sister called again saying I'm being greedy and that her daughter should get a share too. I love my niece as she's my only niece and very special to me but I still said no.

[00:02:46] [SPEAKER_00] In my mind, she's always welcome to stay at my home or the other house anytime once everything is sorted. But she won't receive any percentage of the house because her mother didn't contribute anything. I told my sister to stop calling about it or she wouldn't be welcome at my house. I don't want my children hearing or seeing their mom and aunt arguing. Nor do I want my niece to hear. She said that was fine because she wouldn't want to visit someone so greedy anyway.

[00:03:13] [SPEAKER_00] Opi also adds in the same post, just for newcomers as I know some are confused. I'm solely on the deed. No arrangement was made. Mother paid well below market rent. Two houses down just listed the house for $6.50 weekly. As far as I can see, absolutely not the arsehole in any way whatsoever. Opi bought the house, her name on the deed, her deposit, her mortgage, her property taxes, the maintenance bills at the same time.

[00:03:43] [SPEAKER_00] And Opi even paid for the funeral and the headstone costs. And it sounds like the sisters contributed absolutely nothing, not a penny, and then comes up to you thinking that they're entitled to something here. Opi was kind enough to even offer them five grand a piece out of their own pocket while raising her kids, the funeral costs, and they called her greedy. I'd absolutely be taking that offer back because they're taking the piss, but the commenter says, wait a minute, you bought this house and it's in your name,

[00:04:13] [SPEAKER_00] presumably, and they want it. Why? Because your mom lived there. Is this house entirely in your name? Did your mom have any stake in the game? Opi says yes, that's why they want it. They think they're entitled to it because she paid half and lived in it, so they see it as partly hers. But the house is fully in my name. Honestly, they always thought of it as my mom's house and never really saw it any other way. But I won't say that to them. Commodore says not the arsehole.

[00:04:43] [SPEAKER_00] If you hadn't bought that house, your mother would have continued renting. So the money she spent on the mortgage would still not be there anyway. And there would be nothing for your siblings to ask for. At least that's the way I look at it. The money your mother spent was the same as paying rent. It just so happens that you were the landlord. It's your house. Do with it what you wish. Opi says that's how I see it. Thank you. Needed clarification from unbiased people as all I've heard these past weeks was

[00:05:11] [SPEAKER_00] I was in the wrong and began doubting myself. So Opi came back into the post two and a half weeks later and says if you had not read my previous post and are interested, then you should. Updates about two days after I made the post. I ended up speaking with both of my sisters and we had a long conversation. It took a while but things eventually calmed and were able to talk properly again. At first they insisted they should have a share of the house.

[00:05:38] [SPEAKER_00] And I went through everything I paid for over the year as an owner. I explained the repairs I handled while wasn't living there. The renovations, installing security cameras, property taxes, mortgage rate increases and the constant upkeep of the house. When they heard the full picture, they both admitted that those ongoing costs weren't something they could realistically afford themselves. I also got the sense that my elder sister never really cared about owning part of the house and always believed it was mine anyway.

[00:06:06] [SPEAKER_00] Once she said that out loud, my other sister eventually agreed too and the argument finally settled. That same day, we sorted through our mum's belongings together. We each kept the things we personally gave to our mother and shared out the rest. In the end, I kept most of the furniture simply because neither of them wanted it. The house is now mostly set up the same as before but I've kept my mum's personal belongings in our room. Now that some time has passed, I've decided to turn the house into a small holiday home

[00:06:36] [SPEAKER_00] that the whole family can use. When I told my sisters, they were happy and thankful. I did explain there would be a few rules though. No parties, remove all food before leaving. If something gets broken, it needs to be replaced. I also said I wouldn't expect them to pay any household bills but there would be a cleaning fee. The maid, who used to come weekly for my mum, now comes every third week and after any weekend visit. She washes sheets, remakes beds and cleans the entire house.

[00:07:05] [SPEAKER_00] I told them the cost is about $90 plus a tip. Jumping in before we get to the next part. I bet you they're not going to be happy about this. Here we go. One sister wasn't happy and said she wasn't paying for my maid. What I explained when I stayed there recently, I paid it myself. It's actually reasonable considering she comes on short notice and has to clean everything when doesn't do that each visit. So I explained to my sisters that it really wasn't about making money from them.

[00:07:33] [SPEAKER_00] It's simply about sanitation. If the house sits closed up for weeks without being properly cleaned, it will start to smell. I also used the example of I staying at my husband's parents' holiday home many times and every time we always pay the cleaning fee and usually leave a small gift as well. It's just respectful and a way of saying thank you for using the place. My sister kept arguing though, saying I was just trying to take money from her, which honestly isn't the case.

[00:08:01] [SPEAKER_00] I even explained that the maid doesn't change the sheets every single visit unless I ask and I pay extra. I only plan to have them fully changed before our own family stays because we have small kids. These things have to be planned ahead around school and after school activities and aren't ever spontaneous. I told them we were planning to visit as a family in about two weeks and that both sisters and my niece could come too. Since we'd all be there together, they wouldn't have to pay the cleaning fee that time.

[00:08:29] [SPEAKER_00] The plan was for my husband and I to sleep with our youngest in mum's old room. The older two kids to share the next room with their cousin, one sister to take the other room and the other sister to use the fold-out couch. Everyone agreed and we ended up staying last Saturday and Sunday. Honestly, we enjoyed ourselves. I was happy and took heaps of photos. However, when my husband took the kids out for a bit, my younger sister started making judgmental comments about the house like,

[00:08:56] [SPEAKER_00] You think you're better than us because you have this house and you could easily rent this out and make real money instead of letting it sit here. She also said things like, It must be nice owning two houses while making us still pay your bills. At that point, I'd honestly had enough. I told her to stop and that if she continued making comments like that, she wouldn't be welcome to stay next time. She replied that I would just use the house against her every time we argued.

[00:09:23] [SPEAKER_00] I told her the only time I would is if she insults me in my own home, especially when I've only tried to be kind and include everyone. I then told her she had until dinner time to change her attitude. Otherwise, we'd go out to dinner without her and I wouldn't be paying for hers. In the end, she decided to leave early and we haven't spoken since. Love her but had enough and just found out she isn't speaking to my other sister as she took my side. Top commenter on this one said,

[00:09:50] [SPEAKER_00] I'm sorry one of your sisters has let a sense of entitlement strain your relationship. I don't think there's anything you can do. She's made the decision to blame you for perfectly valid and reasonable life choices and will continue to feel entitled to your money whilst also resenting you for having your life together. I hope your family and your other sister have fun making loads more memories in your holiday home. This one was a bit of a roller coaster for me because, you know,

[00:10:15] [SPEAKER_00] at the very start, I was absolutely not a penny goodbye kind of stuff. Then because the sisters contributed nothing and had the nerve to demand a third each. You know, it was simple for me. But then OP turns it into a holiday home and I was like, oh no, don't you dare. This isn't going to go well, right? So also thinking, you know, it's a lovely thing to do at the same time because she didn't have to include them all, especially with the way that they've been behaving.

[00:10:43] [SPEAKER_00] But because she could have sold it, she could have rented it out, she could have kept it entirely to herself. Her name is on the deed. End of story, right? But she chose to keep her mom's memory alive and share it with her family, which is nice. And it seems one of the sisters at least seemed to start appreciating that and saw it for what it was. Whereas the other sister, you know, she was getting a free weekend at a holiday home. The cleaning fee absolutely waived at the same time, but still decided to make shitty comments towards OP.

[00:11:12] [SPEAKER_00] And I think at the end of this, at some point you just have to accept that some people's going to resent you no matter how kind you are about it. And I think OP found that out in the end. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And let's move on to another story. Now our next story comes from Irritable Seabass who says, I the asshole for emergency breastfeeding my best friend's baby.

[00:11:39] [SPEAKER_00] And just a trigger warning on this one, it contains postpartum depression. So if you do want to skip the story, please feel free to do so. Timestamps are always down in the description along the timeline below. Thank you. My best friend of 10 years gave birth to her first child about eight weeks ago. She never wanted kids and she disconnected from her pregnancy and never really connected to the baby after he was born either. She has really bad postpartum depression. So I've been trying to help.

[00:12:08] [SPEAKER_00] However, I gave birth to my second child about two weeks after she had her baby. So I'm needed at home with my family. I could tell she was getting stressed. So I offered to take the baby for a day so she could have downtime. She brought him over and we put the babies together. Her son has a really bad digestion problem. So he can't ingest regular formula. Only breast milk or special formula. She doesn't breastfeed. So he takes the special formula.

[00:12:36] [SPEAKER_00] I asked her if she had packed diapers, wipes, a change of clothes and bottles in his diaper bag. And she said yes. Then she left. For the first three hours, everything was fine. The babies chilled out together. We all played. I put on some music and danced around for them. My baby needed a feed so I fed her. And then about 30 minutes later, best friend's baby needed a feed. I went to fix him a bottle and realized she hadn't packed his formula.

[00:13:04] [SPEAKER_00] When I asked if she had packed bottles, she answered literally. But I never specified if she packed formula as well. I thought it was a given. My baby is exclusively on breast milk right now and everything I have is frozen. And it takes time for frozen milk to unfreeze. I tried calling her about four times and she kept sending me to voicemail so I text her. She had red receipts on so I know she saw my text. I kept trying to call and she just wouldn't answer me.

[00:13:32] [SPEAKER_00] I couldn't go to the store and get a jar of formula because she didn't leave me as car seat. And I only had my infant seat. My older child is seven and doesn't need an infant seat anymore. I don't know my neighbors and other than my husband, I don't have family in the area. At this point, the baby was crying and screaming so hard I thought he might get sick or hurt. So I sat down and breastfed him myself. I'm completely healthy. She just got a flu shot and a clean bill of health from both my OB and my GP.

[00:14:02] [SPEAKER_00] I have no diseases. So the baby was not at risk for anything. Best friend finally returned three and a half hours later. I remained calm but told her that she can't leave her child with someone and not answer when that person calls and texts because it might actually be a serious emergency. And that she also hadn't packed any of the baby's special formula. I told her how badly he got upset and how worried I was so I breastfed him myself.

[00:14:28] [SPEAKER_00] She freaked out on me and accused me of some horrible things and then left. She blocked me on social media. Something I learned when a mutual friend told me. Best friend was saying some awful things about me online. I didn't know what to do. I can't even talk to her about this. I thought I was doing the right thing. But maybe I was wrong. From I. E.R. Sol. ETA. I wanted to let everyone know because I could not due to the character count restrictions.

[00:14:56] [SPEAKER_00] One of our mutual friends already placed a call to CPS a few weeks ago. We had several friends who are also worried about her but were unable to come help me when this happened. She gets two wellness visits a week at her home from a case worker. And she had been ordered to seek mental health help. I'm brand new at breastfeeding. Didn't do it with my older child due to illness. And I'm still learning about everything. I received three free sessions with a lactation consultant while in the hospital and nothing since. ETA. When I say in the post.

[00:15:26] [SPEAKER_00] No one who could come help me. I mean it. Like dead serious. My husband and I moved to this town right before we got married. And our family is all back on the west coast. We have a small group of friends. All of whom were either at work or unable to come at the moment. We're a small town. We don't have Uber. Hell. Domino's Pizza doesn't even deliver out here. I didn't know my neighbors. I'm not even sure what my closest neighbors names are. We're farm country. The nearest neighbor is a mile up the road.

[00:15:54] [SPEAKER_00] Even my husband couldn't leave work. ETA. I lost my temper on a few folks and have been banned for seven days. So I can't answer direct questions. Here are a few big ones. 1. Where is the baby's father? Dead. Drugs. Not a good person. Conception was less than good. 2. Why didn't I express milk or a bag? I've literally answered this question a blue billion times. Both in the post and in the comments. So I'm not answering it anymore. 3.

[00:16:24] [SPEAKER_00] Have I called CPS? No. Because CPS is already investigating her on unrelated issues however. The mutual friend mentioned in the post told the case worker. So CPS is aware of all incidents. 4. Not important but I got an article in a newspaper about this. So I feel interesting. 5. Best friend called CPS on me and reported me for the above post. So I'm dealing with that now. ETA made the front page. The commenter says, This story is wild.

[00:16:54] [SPEAKER_00] I'd honestly prefer this over starving my child. Your friend had a very odd reaction. Not the arsehole. OP says, I honestly and truly think she's just really really stressed right now. And this reaction might be a manifestation of her own fears and feelings. I'm really just hurt and upset. That we can't even talk about it. Wet cardboard smell says, You can worry and be upset. But your friend sounds like she is suffering from intense postpartum psychosis and or postpartum depression and anxiety.

[00:17:23] [SPEAKER_00] I can't imagine leaving my child with somebody and not checking my phone or not sending them with literally everything they need. Food obviously for an infant with special dietary needs. Please don't take it personally. Try really hard to know. You did everything you could and you fed the baby. Which is the most important thing here. I'm sorry your friend is struggling. I hope she gets help. Not the arsehole. So it was five weeks later that OP came in with her update and said, Well, hello.

[00:17:53] [SPEAKER_00] Since my post, CPS did come and speak to us. I gave the two workers who came out a full tour of the house. I let them speak to my older daughter. They interacted with the baby. They played with the dog. They interviewed my husband and myself. And we were given the all clear. I showed them my post and let them read some of the comments. I wasn't disciplined or anything. And they told us that unless they get a call about us again, we'll probably never hear from them again.

[00:18:18] [SPEAKER_00] I mentioned in my post and comments that I never received proper breastfeeding and lactation help. Well, that changed too. I got a message from a lactation consultant who actually lives an hour away from me. She made the drive five straight days to come and coach me. Gave me some really great literature and tips. So I'm up to date on breastfeeding now. My baby is thriving and gorgeous. The dog loves her to death. As for my former best friend, she saw the post. She unblocked me and called me and we talked.

[00:18:48] [SPEAKER_00] She got mental help and hired a nanny as well. And she seems to be on the road to doing much better. She apologized for everything and I apologized for my part in it. However, I told her we could never be friends again. Maybe I could have forgiven her for the day she left her baby son with me, but I could never forgive her for calling CPS on me. I could have lost my kids. So we are no longer in contact, but she's not trash talking about me anymore. Anyway, that is what's been happening since my post. It's been an active month for me.

[00:19:18] [SPEAKER_00] We've all had a stomach bug and the dog got his balls cut off. Finally, my husband got a vasectomy and that he's currently recovering from. And I lost 10 pounds. Thanks for listening. Now that clearly there was postpartum depression going on within this story, but for the initial part of it, I was like, absolutely not the asshole in this situation. You handled an emergency with the baby's best interest in mind. What else was you meant to do? You had no options around you and your friend was clearly struggling.

[00:19:48] [SPEAKER_00] And you know, I do feel for her, but leaving a child without food and ignoring calls is the real issue here. And you stepped up when she couldn't. I can maybe understand, you know, the first sort of like visceral reaction would be breastfeeding someone else's child would probably be a bit shocking at first, you know, because it's very personal thing. But the context does matter that this was an emergency and you wasn't doing it to take the piss. You actually just solved a crisis that was in that moment.

[00:20:17] [SPEAKER_00] It was something you had to do. And I really do hope that she continued to get help for a PPD for both her sake and a child's sake at the same time. But what do you guys make of this situation? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. Let's move on to another story. Now, our next story comes from trainingwind1789 from the am I the asshole here subreddit. And it says, am I the asshole here for refusing to watch my daughter when we meet my husband's

[00:20:47] [SPEAKER_00] friend. I created this account to post here as my husband knows my user. Sorry if the title doesn't make any sense. So to start this off, I, 26 female and my husband, 27 male, have a toddler, two female. I don't know how everyone else has it, but our toddler creates so much chaos wherever she is. She's so curious. She explored everything all the time, loves to rearrange stuff and she runs wherever she needs to go. Basically, she is like what I've seen most two-year-olds be like.

[00:21:16] [SPEAKER_00] At home, it's fine. Of course, I tried to keep her in check, but we have, of course, childproof our entire home. The problem here is that one of my husband's friends and his girlfriend live just five minutes away from us. My husband and I get invited there almost every weekend, whether it's for food or just coffee. They're lovely people, but their house is filled with stuff. It's messy and overall the opposite of our home. No problem. They don't have children and they like to have stuff around.

[00:21:43] [SPEAKER_00] The problem is that every weekend I spend three hours running after her, comforting her when she trips, making sure she doesn't break stuff or put things in her mouth. It's honestly tiring. And the fact that my husband just sits at the table and chats while I run around like crazy for so long irritates me. When we got invited over two weekends ago, I told him I wouldn't tag along. I explained my reasons and he told me that I was overreacting and that it's a normal part of parenting. I told him that either way, I wasn't coming.

[00:22:11] [SPEAKER_00] If he wanted our daughter to tag along, he could bring her. So he did. And he came back after just an hour and was in a bad mood the rest of the day. I asked him how it went and he asked me if I felt happy with myself. This last weekend, we got invited over once again. I asked him if he wanted to look after her himself or do 50-50 with me. He didn't respond and went there himself. He's been off with me the whole week, making passive aggressive remarks about my insane

[00:22:39] [SPEAKER_00] need to always be right and yeah, other stuff. I'm starting to feel like I went overboard because I know he has a much harder time keeping her in check than I have. And even if I have it hard, am I the asshole for refusing to go there if that means I have to watch her the whole time? Them coming to us isn't an option. I don't know why because before his girlfriend moved in, he was here just as much as we were at his place. But after she moved in, he has declined every invite to come here.

[00:23:06] [SPEAKER_00] I think he has a much harder time keeping her in check because he doesn't. And his comment about it's a normal part of parenting. Absolutely not. Leaving one parent to do everything is absolutely not normal. But a commenter says, I can't tell you how many family gatherings I've been to with this exact same dynamic. The women doing the cooking while watching the kids, while the men just sit around and chat with a not a care in the world. Opie says it's pretty much the same in his family.

[00:23:33] [SPEAKER_00] In my family, it was the standard that both parents look after their children. But in his, it's only the mother's or even his own mother or grandma who look after them. I guess we grew up with different outlooks on parenting. But I can't help but feel like my outlook on it is right. Commodore says you did yourself a disservice by having a child with him, knowing his family dynamics and not discussing your expectations of him beforehand. Opie says we did talk about stuff like that even early on.

[00:23:59] [SPEAKER_00] At first, he even wanted us to equally spit the parental leave offered in our country. But it's like that after she was born, something just switched regarding his outlook on parenthood. Equality between us as parents and things like this. I sometimes can't help but feel deceived. But I know that he unfortunately has influence from his family. So sadly, that plays a big part into it. I just wish I would have prepared for that possibility at least. Different idea says not the arsehole. The toddler made him look like a jackass in front of the friend group on that solo trip.

[00:24:30] [SPEAKER_00] Opie says yeah. His friend actually had to make a few comments about how bad my husband was doing alone with her. So he left because he felt embarrassed about it. Opie adds a small update in the same post and says, We've talked pretty short about it this morning. And it turns out he got pretty embarrassed at his friend's house. We'll probably talk more about it. But yeah, he pretty much realized the difference in how much we both put in. Don't know if I'll make an update post. If people want it and if something changes or anything, I will probably. If not, thanks for all the comments.

[00:25:00] [SPEAKER_00] I tried to read both the top comments and the ones who got downvoted. And I think both were pretty helpful for what points I will bring up. So then Opie comes in with our update and says, Hi everyone, who will see this update? I'll start this off by saying that I'm very grateful for all the responses my post got. I tried responding to people and read all the comments, but I honestly got overwhelmed with all the attention it got. I'm still incredibly happy that so many wanted to help and give their opinion. So the update.

[00:25:25] [SPEAKER_00] I added this in the edit I made on the original post, but the short answer I got was that he was embarrassed. His friend had made a few comments about how different me and my husband take care of her and how much more my husband struggles with her. I'm sorry if this update makes no sense. We talked about it very much later yesterday and we both brought up so many points. So I'll share those down here. Again, I'm sorry. One, I brought up his lack of understanding for the work I put in to be a good mother.

[00:25:52] [SPEAKER_00] Also brought up that he always criticizes my parenting, but never tries to parent himself. He argued that I had taken the lead in parenting, forcing him to be a background character. This stems from the fact that he wanted to gentle parent to what I saw as an extreme. He wanted us to forbid the usage of the word no, other ways of telling her, don't or discipline in any way. I refuse this and I'm not strict or anything, but for God's sake,

[00:26:17] [SPEAKER_00] I need to be able to tell my child to stop doing stuff, especially when that can cause her harm. Still, he felt like I had pushed him out of the way, which I didn't. He still parents her like that when they're alone. I just refuse to parent her that way. Two, he himself brought up the way he's behaved during these last week was not appropriate and he told me he was very sorry for that. He told me he had thought it all over, but he also felt like I played a big part in how he has felt and acted. Three, I brought up how whenever we go somewhere,

[00:26:46] [SPEAKER_00] our daughter becomes my sole responsibility and he just gives up on being a parent. To this point, I also brought up that before we had our daughter, he hated the idea of becoming the kind of dad he saw his family members be when he was little. But he had turned out to be just like that. He denied that and told me he wasn't like that because when our daughter shows him things or talks to him, he interacts with her when we're out. I told him that that is the bare minimum. He disagreed and wanted me to drop that. Of course he did.

[00:27:14] [SPEAKER_00] Or he backtracked from what he told me yesterday morning. From going from that, he felt embarrassed to that I had gone out of my way to try and embarrass him on purpose apparently. This is not true and I explained my reasons to him. He still felt like I'd refused to come with him just to make him look like a bad father in front of his friend. We talked so much more, but I feel that was the most important stuff. So in conclusion, he still feels like I'm wrong and he's right. I can't say anything to change his mind.

[00:27:42] [SPEAKER_00] He refuses marriage counseling or to take any action to my points. I don't really know what to do from here. I feel disappointed and frustrated with the whole situation. This will probably be the only update I make to this because I don't think the situation will improve in any way unfortunately. Thanks again to all of you. Even if the situation didn't improve, I still feel a whole lot more confident in myself and where I stand. We have a mini update in a moment, but a commenter says, if he isn't willing to do couples therapy and firmly believes that nothing he has done in the situation is wrong,

[00:28:12] [SPEAKER_00] then it may be time for you to start talking to a lawyer if this is not how you want to live the rest of your life. Only you can make that decision. But just talking to a couple of lawyers to get possible options is not necessarily a bad thing. That's not saying you want to divorce him. That's just saying you're making sure your ass is covered in case this gets worse. I'm sorry that he's not willing to even consider negotiating some sort of therapy or anything like that and I wish you the best of luck. Hope he says, I can't lie and say that I haven't thought about that because I have.

[00:28:42] [SPEAKER_00] I feel so sad that the thought has even crossed my mind because he truly was amazing before and during the pregnancy. We've had more problems than just this, but almost all of our problems have occurred since she was born. It's like he just went from being one person to another after it and obviously not for the better. I just hate for it to even come to a point where I doubt our relationship sometimes. Another commenter says, you have a husband problem. If he refuses to acknowledge his wrongdoings and refuses therapy,

[00:29:11] [SPEAKER_00] you know what the only option is. It's leaving. And he can be a full-time parent on his time and no more excuses that it's somehow your fault. Really, you probably should have contemplated a lot harder on marrying him at all. Not the asshole for making him be a parent. You're the asshole if you stay and put up with his shit though. Hope he says, I really think I'll talk more in depth with his mother about all of this. His mom divorced his dad when my husband was 15. I don't know that much,

[00:29:37] [SPEAKER_00] but I know his dad was very much like how my husband has behaved since our daughter was born. So I also think it would be good for his mom to talk with him about all this. To explain how things like this really affect the relationship. If he wants to put in work after that, he absolutely can and I would love it. But if not, I think I already know the outcome unfortunately. And the mini update comes in and says, yeah, we will separate. We talked again today and everything has just turned worse. He isn't the man I married or wanted to create a family with.

[00:30:06] [SPEAKER_00] Everything has just gone to shit and I hate it all. But it is what it is. I think I finally felt comfortable to put my foot down. Thanks to all of you on Reddit. And I'm not really surprised by the outcome in the end. How about you guys? Let us know your thoughts down in the comments below. And just a huge thank you for being here today. Getting involved in the stories, your love, your support, your time. It always means the absolute world to me. So thank you so, so much for being here. And hopefully I'll see you in the next one.

[00:30:36] [SPEAKER_00] Take care and much love.

[00:30:42] [SPEAKER_01] Bye. Bye. you were everything i need but then along came a time when you crushed my dreams oh yeah you played me like a fool when you made me believe that the line between love was ridiculous oh yeah you see we in the spare crime everywhere you're selling false hope because you just don't care you just don't care you just don't just don't care you just don't still selling false hope because you just

[00:31:09] [SPEAKER_01] don't house if we talk into it